Caught in between

"I love you! And I have for all these years… please, can't you see how much you mean to me?!" America clung to me and cried.

"I'm sorry…" It was all I could say.

The look I got back killed me over and over again. America let go of me as he fell to the ground and cried. I had not seen him cry since he was a child. I wanted to stretch my hands out and comfort him.

"Don't touch me!" He growled as he looked up at me with his blue eyes, "LEAVE! I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN!"

America… you must understand, you did fight for independence after all so why do you want me now?

Chapter 1

The world conference was just about to begin when I arrived with France. We walked into the room and I was glad to see he wasn't there yet. France held my hand as we took our seats at the far left side of the table.

"Are you alright, Mon amour?" I had been dreading coming to this meeting, seeing it would be the first time I'd see him since... well...

"No…" I said truthfully.

"You'll be ok, I promise," France whispered before kissing me lightly on the lips.

I looked around the room and noticed all the couples. Italy sat on Germany, playfully nuzzling him; Spain and Romano, though Romano was yelling at Spain, there was love behind the words; China was being cuddled by Russia near the doors; Japan was watching his sleeping Greece and… The doors suddenly opened and all colour drained from my face. America entered the room, his usual happy self.

"Hey man! Long-time no see!" he said to some country or another.

I couldn't take my eyes off him as he moved around the watched my eye sight before realizing what I was looking at. I felt strong hands grip my face as he turned me to look at him.

"Just keep your eyes on me," He whispered before locking our lips passionately.

I knew that he was doing this to comfort me but I also knew his eyes were open and watching the same person I'd just been watching. I knew that he wanted to make America jealous, rub it in that he had me. I kissed back half-heartedly; the empty feeling began to settle in again.

As I pulled away, my eyes instantly found America. He had seated himself on the other side of the room and was starring daggers, having just watched France's display of affection. The meeting soon began and everyone started to notice America's gloom.

"Ve~ is it just me or is everyone becoming a bit... depressed?" Italy seemed to be one of the only countries not affected by it.

"Ja… how about a break," Germany said, not quite himself, "We'll come back in an hour…"

Everyone agreed and most countries quickly left the room, wanting to escape this gloom that had a hold of them all. I stayed where I was, I wasn't game to move. America had been watching me this whole time; the way a hunter would stare down the animal he wished to shoot.

"England… come on," France grabbed my hand and tried to pull me out of my chair but I wouldn't budge, "You're only making this harder for yourself."

I knew he was right but I didn't want to move. I was eventually dragged to my feet and France wrapped his arms around me for comfort and support. I could see America out of the corner of my eye.

His eyes followed us and I wanted to run screaming when we had to pass him. I closed my eyes momentarily and wished we could get out of here sooner.

"Hey England, how's it going?" I stopped; everything stopped.

I couldn't move, I couldn't breathe. All I could do was look ahead of me. I couldn't even hear France or feel his slight tugs on my waist.

"What, not going to talk to me?" America's tone was poisonous.

"Why should he?" France spat back and I instantly came back to this reality.

"Well it wasn't like I was the one who broke his heart," America's stare was full of hate.

"Oh get over it," France turned back to me, "Come on, let's go,"

I moved away from France just as America threw himself at him. There was a cry and a splatter of blood as America's fist made contact with France's nose. France tried to push the American off him but America was by far, one of the strongest nations.

"AMERICA! FRANCE!" Came cries from some of the other nations left in the room.

"Stop it!" I yelled.

America looked up at me, his fist coiled back ready to hit France again. America stared at me for some time; I felt the first tear roll down my cheek. I couldn't take it anymore. Turning I ran out of the conference room.

With tears streaming down my cheeks I just ran, out of the door and past nations who tried to stop me, I just couldn't take it! I kept running till I'd found a far enough away room. Opening the door I was thankful to find it deserted.

I shut the door and locked it. Sinking to the floor I let myself cry. This was the first time I'd cried since the Revolutionary Wars. 'America, you stupid git! Why are you always the one to make me cry?!' My sobs grew louder as the time passed.

I finally reached that stage, when you cry, that even though you feel ten times worse and want to cry, you just can't anymore. I closed my eyes and wanted to sleep. I hated America… I hated myself… 'Maybe I should end it all now,'

Just as the thought entered my mind I heard a light knock at the door. It scared me and I sat still, waiting for the person to speak.

"England… It's me," France called; he sounded odd. Probably since his nose had just been broken.

I knelt up and unlocked the door. France opened it slowly and found me quickly. He dived down to the floor to hold me. We sat like this for some time; neither one wanting to move.

"Are you alright?" France asked, pulling away and looking at me.

"I'm fine… you were the one who got punched," It was then that I noted the bandage tape over his swollen nose and the bit of blood dripping down.

I was quick to pull out my handkerchief and dab at the blood. France smiled before leaning down to kiss me gently.

"It's all right, just a broken nose but Japan said it'll be ok in a few days," France kissed the palm of my hand, "And you're not all right."

It was slow but sudden as France laid me down. Our lips locked as his tongue moved with mine, making the hair on the back of my neck stand up. God, France can kiss.

"France..." I muttered as his hands went up under my shirt and his lips down my neck.

He licked and sucked at my skin, leaving red marks. A knee had moved between my legs and I couldn't help but grind against it. This was France's way of comfort, I may feel worse after but right now I needed this.

Our clothed piled up and our breath grew ragged. Our naked, slicked bodies rubbed together. I was more desperate for it now. I let out a needy moan and France entered me. I rocked my hips as he moved within me, looking for that spot.

My back arched as he found it, I opened my eyes only to close them again as his lips were upon mine. As France changed our position something caught my eye, a shadow by the window. I couldn't concentrate on it. I gripped at France's hair as his pace grew faster. I moaned and grunted with him.

But all this time I was trying to watch the shadow. France noticed that I wasn't giving my unbinding attention to him, and turned my face back to look at him. I panted as our hand's entwined. I was trying to think of France but someone else had entered my mind.

I closed my eyes and imagined it was him. I imagined that he was the one pounding into me; it was his tongue dancing with mine; that he was the one making me feel this good. I could feel his name about to slip from my lips.

"America," I whispered and suddenly all movement stopped.

It was then that I realize what had happened. France looked at me, his eyes full of confusion. I quickly pulled away from him, full of shock of what I had just done. My eyes looked to where the shadow had been to find it gone.

I panted slightly, whipping sweat from my brow. I looked up at France who seemed to be pondering something.

"You… You said… You said America…" He trailed off before his eyes shot up to me.

"F-France… I… it…" I really couldn't explain this, nor would I get a chance.

I had no time to fight back, no time to do anything but yell. France held my wrists above my head and stared at me possessively. The whole time, as he bought our bodies together again and again, I begged him to stop.

He didn't want anyone else to have me, America the least since he was someone I was supposed to hate. I cried, unable to voice anything anymore. I craved gentle touches but these were painful.

I wished for sweet nothings in my ear but instead got harsh breathing. I wanted… someone else…

I lay where I had been taken, not having moved since. Tears rolled down my cheeks, my eyes watched the ceiling. France sat next to me, his hand moving up and down my thigh. He had a slight frown on his face, and I couldn't decipher what he was thinking.

"I'm sorry… you needed comfort and I only hurt you more," I knew he was truly sorry, but his possessiveness over took him.

"It's alright… the damage has been done," I whispered, "Please leave,"

"England… please?" France looked at me but I would not meet his eyes.

He kissed me lightly on the forehead and dressed before leaving. It was then that I realized I had missed the meeting; if it was still happening France would go back and make some excuse for my absence.

The tears stopped and I was able to sit up with only slight pain in my lower back. I looked around the room; I hadn't taken much notice of it when I got here. It appeared to be a living room of sought, with all the couches and fire place and large book shelves.

I reached for my clothing and dressed slowly. It pained me to move but I tried to forget about it. I walked over to one of the large arm chairs and sat down. It was much like the one I had at home.

I looked to the table beside the chair and found something that made me feel a lot better. 'The Princess Bride,' I opened to the first page and began to read. I had read this book over a million times but it still captivated me every time.

"As you wish," I read, "But every time he said this, what he meant to say was… I love you,"

It was a story of true love, undying love, something I probably will never find. I put the book down slowly and looked up after realizing this then… I saw him. He stood just outside the window and it looked as though he hadn't been there too long.

I watched him take a long drag from the smoke he was holding. 'Since when did you smoke?' I watched as he slid down the wall and sat on the ground. He dropped his head and looked at his shoes.

"I love you…" He whispered, "I… Love you,"

I knew he was talking to me but I also knew that he didn't know I was here. He continued to talk to the imaginary me who seemed to be out there with him. I wanted to answer some of the questions he was asking but the words wouldn't leave my lips.

We both sat in silence for a while before he got up and left. In those two minutes I had learnt a lot of things that I never knew about America; that he drunk so he could forget and that he took some stranger to his bed most nights.

'I should be the one in your bed,' I slapped a hand over my mouth as this thought entered my mind. It was then that my phone went off. I was quick to pull it out and read the text from France.

'Meeting over, meet me in my car?'

I sat there for some time before finding a mirror and checking my appearance. I had slightly red eyes and marks on my neck, but they were mostly hidden. I decided it was as good as it was going to get and left.

As I came to the doors, leading out of the world meeting house, the Nations there watched me. Some had a questioning gaze or a worried look. I took in the amount of couples around here too; all happy.

Germany and Italy were kissing now; Romano and Spain, cuddling; so were China and Russia; Japan and Greece walked out holding hands. I didn't know what I felt towards all these happypeople. I got to France's car and climbed in.

Looking at France I wanted to cry again. He looked horrible. His nose had begun to bleed again, it was now red and swollen to but the worst thing was the tears. I looked at him for some time before stretching my arms out to him. He leaned over and placed his head on my chest.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," He kept muttering.

"It's ok, I forgive you," I kissed him lightly, "Come on let's just go home and forget everything that happened today."

It would have to be one of the worst days of my life. The person I hate/love wants me; my boyfriend had his nose broken; I was just about raped I guess and… it was all just crap. I need a bath and at least three cups of tea before I even think of working anything out.

A/N: Hello and welcome to the first chapter of Caught in between. What do you think? Do you like it? I hope you do~ Thanks for reading to the end of the page! This is my second big chaptered Fan Fiction I've written so let's hope it works out well! It should ;)