DISCLAIMER: I do not own Sonic the Hedgehog or any of the characters! Other than that, ENJOY!

CHAPTER FOUR?

"Oh grow up, Sonic. He's just a friend!"

Sonic and Amy sat side by side in Doctor Eggman's mastor suite on a yucky yellow and orange polka dotted bedspread. Eggman had finally caved in under Amy's persistance that siblings should be able to share the same room and bed when they are running from the popo.

It only took 16 hours of Amy's intense sobbing to reach that teeniest soft spot of the evil scientist's decayed heart. However it happened under one condition.

A condition that was made between Doctor Eggman and Amy the second Sonic's eyes and ears were safely behind the walls of Eggman's bathroom stall.

"If that's true..." Sonic began. "Then why did he kiss you on the mouth the moment he saw you?"

"I don't know Sonic! It's not like I asked him for it!"

"He had to have kissed you for a reason. That would'nt have just happened out of the blue!"

Amy threw her $67 manicured nails in the air.

"Fine! Alright alright! We had sex! Okay Sonic? We had sex!" Amy had had enough. "Happy now?"

Definetley not.

Sonic was not prepared for this shocking confession. Neither was his hedgehog pride. Pathetic, heartbroken tears threatened to fall.

Sonic blinked faster than the speed of sound in order for the unwanted substance to evaporate. The suface of his eyes bubbled with the sudden heat.

"Ow!"

"Sonic don't you know what convection is? You should've known what that would do to your eyes." Amy says matter-of-factly.

No Sonic did not know what that was, he failed and dropped out of Kindergarten.

"How many times did you do it with him?"

Amy bursts out laughing. "Does it matter?! He's nothing to me! We are just friends!"

"Just tell me the truth."

"Fine. We messed around three times senior year. It was just a part of my rebel phase to piss my folks off."

Three times.

They had sex three times and Amy friendzoned him.

If Sonic wanted to stay out of the friendzone, he had to have sex with Amy at least four times.

He felt hopeful again.

That didn't sound too hard. I've got plenty of experience, Sonic assured himself.

There was that one time I masturbated to a lock of Amy's hair. There was that one time I was dared to play "7 Minutes in Heaven" with Tails when I was 15 and I got to third base...

Wait.

What happens in a closet, stays in the closet.

Sonic shivers.

Thank the Great Headgehog in the sky that he wasn't a virgin.