Author's Note: For those of you who care about such things-ESCAPE is a real radio drama that aired in the 1950s. It can be found online in both html format, and as a recording that you can listen to for free.

Also, thanks to those of you who wished me a "happy birthday" today! You guys really are the best Scarf-clad army an author could have! (sniffs and wipes away tears).


I reached for the cigarettes. There was only one left in the packet. I lit it. I threw it on the empty fire…and watched it burn.

Seras stared at the fire, when suddenly a voice pierced through the dim room.

"Under the direction of Norman Macdonnell, ESCAPE has brought you "The Birds" by Daphne du Maurier, specially adapted for radio by Robert Ryf, starring Ben Wright with Virginia Gregg. Featured in the cast where John Deh-" Walter clicked off the radio and Seras stretched before pulling herself off the floor.

This was a Thursday night tradition of theirs: relaxing in the sitting-room while listening to a channel that still played old radio shows-chiefly the half-hour thriller ESCAPE. Seras enjoyed it because it was the closest thing to television that she was able to get in the boring mansion; Walter enjoyed it because the outdated shows reminded him of his youthful days.

They listened together; Seras often sprawled on her stomach on the rug, Walter in "his" comfy chair with closed eyes and a smile on his face. They both escaped the rigors of their lives for 30 minutes, wrapped in up in the retelling of "The Most Dangerous Game" or "The Fall of the House of Usher" (Seras' personal favorite). They'd heard the stories at least a thousand times, but it seemed as though neither of them cared as they kept meeting up at exactly 6:59 pm each week.

In all honesty, Seras often looked forward to their ritual; it relaxed her before she went to train with Alucard or on a mission with her men. She was pretty sure Walter looked forward to it as well; the one time that she was forced to miss it, he'd given her a sad glance-although he'd brushed her apologies aside.


Shaking the thoughts from her head, she bid Walter bye for the moment and made her way down to Alucard's chambers. They hadn't had a mission in two days, and already Seras was feeling antsy as she walked through the cooler air of the lower levels. That wasn't a good thing….if she was bored, that meant Alucard was bored, and a bored Alucard wasn't something very beneficial to have on your hands.

The hairs on her neck rose slightly but she didn't falter, continuing her stroll. Contrary to her outward indifference, she was actually on high alert as she tried implementing her training. Alucard's mentorly advice rang in her mind as she walked, branching out her sixth sense as easily as she did her sense of sight or hearing. After a long moment she stopped and stared a spot next to her, looking at a blank cement wall.

"I see you," she called in a sing-song voice. Her master emerged from the spot, a satisfied expression on his face.

"Very good; much faster than last time," he said with a nod. "But it took you far too long to find me. I'd have killed you by now if I wanted to." Seras frowned slightly, making a mental note to work harder on observing her surroundings. "Where were you?" he added, falling into step beside her on their way to the basement. "Your mind was elsewhere this evening."

"I was with Walter," Seras replied with a shrug. Alucard gave her a look but said nothing. They reached his chambers and Seras waited, as always, until he invited her in with a wave of his hand. Even if he never asked permission to enter her room, she'd never felt right about just barging in his although she was pretty sure that he didn't mind. In fact, she had half a mind to believe she was the only one allowed in his room at all.

"You're right," he said in answer to her thoughts, although he didn't clarify which one he'd meant to answer. Maybe he meant both? His outerwear vanished with a wave of his hand, leaving him in his suit and boots. Seras looked around the sparsely furnished room curiously. She'd never been inside farther than his chair, but she saw the only other furnishings were his coffin and an old cupboard. Feeling bold, she walked over to the cupboard and looked at the items littering the top of it. A tiny hand mirror caught her eye and she picked it up, admiring her image in the glass.

"Do you often stay with Walter when you're not with me?" he asked, not bothering to look around the chair and see what she was up to. She put the mirror down and picked up a leather-bound book.

"Yeah, I do most of the time. Every once in a while I used to visit Sir Integra but since she's currently…unavailable I suppose that's out of the question." The poor woman still had a full three months of prison left, and Alucard refused to take her to visit.

She flipped the pages and frowned when she found it was in a foreign language. Going to the last page, she found that part of the book was empty, but the last written page had her name on it, familiar against the strange words. Maybe it's Master's memoirs? she considered before returning the book to its former spot.

"And for how long?" he asked quietly. Seras stopped, looking at the back of the throne before moving down to open the cupboard door. It was filled with golden objects. Making a face (money didn't seem so important anymore when you supposedly lived forever) she closed the door and moved over to view the coffin.

"Um, about thirty minutes or so? Maybe longer-it depends on how many chores he has to do. Most of the time we have to make anything we do rather hasty. We still have fun though." She fought the urge to finger the beautiful lettering on the lid. A vampire's coffin was a sacred thing; you didn't just touch it without the owner's permission. Suddenly she felt his mind spear her own and she jumped with a yelp. She put a hand on her temple and spun to face the chair.

"Ow! I wasn't gonna touch it, I promise!" she half-moaned and stomped back around to the front of the chair, her exploration over for the moment. She wavered when she saw his hands clenching the armrests, his knuckles white against his already-pale skin. "What's the matter?" she asked hesitantly. "Master?"

"No. Do not do anything with Walter again. I forbid it." His voice was deathly quiet and forceful. Seras blinked once, twice before the meaning sat in. No more Thursday night radio? No more helping with the laundry or training together? Unacceptable!

"Master, no!" she gasped. "Walter's one of the only friends I've had in my entire life! Don't do this to me!" she said angrily. Alucard looked up sharply, his eyes boring into hers.

"What do you need friends for?" he sneered. "You've got me for eternity, since you won't drink my blood." Seras shook her head in exasperation, trying to think of a way to make him understand.

"Yes, that's right! I've got you for eternity; can't I enjoy Walter while he's still young enough to do things with?" she reasoned, half-hopeful. She saw immediately that that was the wrong thing to say. He growled low in his throat, throwing himself from the chair to tower over her menacingly. She gasped and backed up, her instincts screaming at her: Run away, stupid bloke!

"No! He won't have you-you're mine," Alucard hissed and grabbed her wrist, trying to drag her to him despite her boots scrambling as she tried to get away. He tightened his hold and she heard her bone cracking and squealed in pain, jerking her arm.

"Master!" she cried in disbelief, trying to pry his fingers off before he crushed her. He let go and she went crashing to the floor, sprawled out on the hard stone with an aching tailbone. She whimpered and pulled her wounded arm to her chest, looking up at him, tears in her eyes. She began to realize that there was no reasoning on the matter; her heart clenched at the thought of losing her only friend and she resorted to pure begging. "Master, please don't do this. Don't keep me away from him, please." She saw the answer in his eyes and stood; her heart breaking as it felt the weight of his judgment.

She spasmed and her vision completely blurred as she let out a broken sob, unable to hold back any longer. Turning, she ran out of the room and slammed the heavy door, sprinting up a level to her own room and slamming her own door as well. She flung herself on the bed, not caring whether she turned her nice white sheets red with bloody tears. She just held her pillow and cried as loudly as she could, feeling more alone now than she ever did as a human being.


Hours later, she felt the sun beginning to rise but she remained where she was, rocking her pillow as she sat against the wall. She'd sobbed until she threw up from overexertion, but as soon as she was done she'd sat in the bathroom next to the toilet and began to cry again. Part of her was reminded of her human days where she'd had PMS and had sat alone in her flat, blubbering like an idiot because she forgot to buy paper towels at the store. But this felt different: after all these years, she'd finally found a true friend only to have her master's orders keeping them apart.

It wasn't as if she had to follow his command-sure, she wanted to please him but she'd disobeyed before and didn't die from it or anything. It was more out of fear of what he'd do if she disobeyed. He could hurt her, but worse than that: he wouldn't hesitate to maim or kill Walter. She'd never forgive herself if that had happened.

She finally sniffed for the last time and wiped her eyes on a blood-soaked bath towel that she'd been using as a makeshift hanky. She listened to the sound of silence, punctuated by the ticking of the clock on the dresser. When she'd first begun her breakdown, she'd heard Walter pounding on the door, but that was the last thing she'd needed so she ignored him for the moment. She'd heard him go away soon after, and part of her rationalized that her master may have made him leave her alone.

As for Alucard, he'd tried to worm his way into her mind, but she'd imagined her mental-self slamming a door in his smug face and suddenly he was gone. She realized that she'd just learned something, but half-heartedly conceded that although he didn't, he could have crushed her mental block into fine dust without breaking a sweat.

The man in question popped from the brickwork above her head and she looked wearily at him, emotionally drained. He sniffed at the bath towel in disdain before stepping fully from the wall to address her.

"Have you finished with your little womanly display?" he asked in irritation. "You seemed dead-set on busting my eardrums. Things echo in this basement, you know-and enhancing your sobs with your powers doesn't help much either." Seras closed her eyes, not wanting to look at him.

"I wasn't enhancing my sobs with my powers," she muttered. Now that she'd quieted down, she feltexhausted. I thought crying was supposed to help you feel better, not worse.

"Au contraire. They sounded through the entire grounds. You had all the soldiers running up to the doors because they thought it was some new alarm system," Alucard continued. "You certainly know how to make a nuisance of yourself." From his tone, one would have assumed he was pleased as punch that she had created such an uproar.

Seras felt the first edges of anger curling at her mind. She fingered the sopping towel thoughtfully, a plan working in her brain. She vaguely heard her master ask her something, but she ignored him, instead reaching down to find herself-more specifically, the seat of her powers.

"Answer me. Are you listening, Police Girl?" Alucard asked, and she looked up to glare at him balefully. He narrowed his eyes slightly and crossed his arms, preparing for another fight on her part. She mimicked his stance, crossing her arms and turning slightly on the bed to keep him from her direct line of sight. When he prodded her again to answer, she turned her head and stuck her nose in the air. If he wanted to treat her like a spoiled child, then by God she was going to act like a spoiled child.


Alucard pressed his lips in a thin line. Seras kept her powers focused on him but her eyes closed, using her other senses rather than sight alone to keep her master in check. She heard a snarl and her chin was jerked around violently in a vice grip. She opened her eyes to glower at him, her mouth turned in an angry pout. He repeated his question a third time, and she replied by trying to yank her head out of his hand. When it didn't work, she looked down until he was forced to get close to her face. Gathering her courage, she quickly prayed to whatever god would listen before spitting dead in his left eye. He jerked back in surprise, blinking his eyes rapidly before scowling and back-handing her across the bed. She twisted in the air and landed on all fours without a sound, just like he'd taught her on the training field.

He wiped the remaining spit rolling down his cheek with one thumb as he clomped over toward her, his lip curling and showing the edge of one fang. She bristled like an animal, reminding herself that she was only doing this to make a point (although at this point, it didn't seem to be getting across too well).

She stood, refusing to give in to the fleeting urge to run away from the incoming danger. He raised his hand to hit her again and she caught it mid-slap, pushing against it in a power struggle before giving up when he clearly won, using the momentum from his arm to maneuver out of the way. His nostrils flared and she glanced up to see his eyes were mere slits, a surefire sign that he was beyond pissed.

"You are mine and yet you dare to rebel against me? Do you honestly need to be taught your place?" he gritted out around his teeth, clearly showing an enormous amount of restraint.

"Maybe I don't want to be yours anymore!" she shouted defiantly. "Maybe I want to be free, so I can be with my friends! What next; you're going to force me to stay in this room because a soldier smiled at me on a mission?" Rather than yelling back, Alucard seemed to freeze for a long moment.

"You would rather be free," he said plainly, more a simple fact than a question. He gave her a stony look before biting his wrist and offering it to her. "Be free then." Seras stared at the blood dripping down his arm. She felt a strange twist in her stomach: she couldn't give up now, but she didn't really mean that she wanted to be a No-Life-Queen just yet!

Weighing her options, Seras gulped and moved toward him, her ego not allowing her to admit defeat. She gave him a sorrowful look, their eyes meeting briefly before she leaned forward, sticking her tongue out to catch the first drop of blood that was going to fall from his forearm. Before she was able to get a single lick in, he jerked his arm away, giving her a strange look.

"You really would have," he said in amazement. Seras stared up at him in confusion. Didn't he want this-didn't he offer her the exact same thing back when he first turned her? What changed between then and now? He offered no explanation, simply turning away silently and phasing down through the floor. Seras blinked in surprise before stomping her foot hard in annoyance, leaving a crack in the solid cement. Grumbling to herself, she went to bed. Crossing her hands on her lap, she watched the lid close on her with an infuriated expression, heavy with the thought that she never got the message across to her boneheaded sire.