Part 6:

Everything was silent.

I am not even exaggerating.

There was literally no sound whatsoever.

I stood, frozen on the spot, staring at everybody who all seemed to be staring at me.

What the hell?

C-can they see me?!

"Lucy?" Wendy asked, breaking the creepy silence. She seemed afraid, but yet she still took a step towards me. I only nodded, but didn't speak. I was still afraid that they wouldn't be able to hear me now that they could see me.

Although it doesn't do much good now does it?

I'm still dead.

Natsu!

I suddenly remembered once more what I had literally just recalled.

Natsu…oh my god. I bet he's crushing himself up. He blames himself, I know he does, because if it happened in reverse, I know that I would probably blame myself for the rest of eternity. Oh Natsu…I whipped my head around trying to find him, but I couldn't see him?

Huh?

Where was he?

I felt arms around me. I stiffened. I felt a breath on me. It was warm…and I knew it was Natsu.

"Lucy," he breathed. "Finally…I can actually see you."

I blinked slowly. He just confirmed it. They can actually see me now…why?

"Umm…" I started to say, but then trailed off, still confused. They were all just staring…damnit it was pretty uncomfortable.

"Would you please stop staring at me?!" I snapped at them. They all widened their eyes in surprise and Natsu chuckled, not letting go of me.

Damnit…if they didn't stop staring at me with that pure expression of…of…of hope on their faces, then I was going to burst out into more tears. I was going to…any minute now…

"I guess it really is you, right Lucy?" Gray broke the silence. I just frowned at him, still unsure of how to react.

"Yeah…" I mumbled, trailing off. I looked around the guild watching expressions go from sadness to anxiety and then to a mixed doubtful happiness. However, my gaze stopped on one particular person who was standing by the guild doors.

It was Mavis, and as far as I could tell, she was invisible to everyone right now.

She motioned me over, and I frowned not wanting to take away the happiness that my family just received right away.

She only smiled at my immediate reaction, but kept motioning forward before flicking her head around the guild. I understood, and the weird thing was…I didn't even knew what I "understood".

I just knew that I understood. I shuffled out of Natsu's grasp, and he grunted, but I rushed over to the guild doors. I glanced back at Fairy Tail and gasped,

"So…I'm coming right back, but don't follow me, because if you do, then I won't."

There. That should keep Natsu from coming after me.

Once I was outside, Mavis stopped walking as well. And before I could even say anything, she was hugging me.

"I'm so sorry Lucy…I really am… I mean, I know it's not my fault…but you should not have died this young. You were…no are such a good person, and it really isn't fair, but you know what you have to do, right? And after this… you're free," she whispered. I shivered, and hugged her back.

I didn't want this.

I started to cry then. My whole body was shivering from the choked, broken sobs that I was crying.

The tears flowed, endlessly, down my face, as I buried my head in Mavis's shoulder. She just held on, and I could feel her shaking too.

W-was she crying as well?

Of course…she's dead too…maybe this reminds her of her… that only made my tears worse.

I felt physically broken. My whole body couldn't stop shaking, and my eyes were starting to hurt from how tight I scrunched them up to try and stop the crying.

But the tears continued on.

And I knew they would always be continuing on, even if I am supposedly "free".

I just wanted my life back.

I mean, was that really so hard to ask for?

Why couldn't I have my life back?!

Why?!

I sniffled, and tried pushing Mavis away, but she only shook her head and said,

"This will be the last time to let it all go Lucy. Just. Let. The. Tears. Flow," she stated.

Damn…was she trying…to…help?

I cried, sobbing helplessly at the thought of no future.

Why did this have to be so hard…why…why?!

"I-I don't want to leave them!" I said. Mavis only listened.

"I-I-I don't want to leave them!" I repeated as more tears followed as if it were a endless cycle.

"I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE THEM!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, finally letting go all of the anger and frustration as well as the sadness.

Most of all…the loss. The pain.

My heart was breaking all over again, and I wasn't sure if I could actually handle it this time. I didn't want to. I really didn't. I didn't want to be in this situation.

Why?!

And why can I not stop crying?

Mavis only held me listening to my cries and screams echo around us. My eyes hurt so much, and my throat was becoming sore, but I still wasn't done.

This pain was not done with me.

"Why Mavis?" I whispered so softly, I was afraid that maybe she didn't even hear me. She did and answered back just as softly,

"Because life is cruel Lucy…that's why."

I only nodded. Yes. Life is cruel. Life is the leading cause of death. It's what took away my mother. It's what took away Michelle. It's what made me hate my father.

Life is cruel.

Although…life can be happy too.

I've had so many happy moments in my life, and I am glad that I survived all of those cruelties just to have those moments.

Meeting Natsu…meeting Erza and Gray…meeting everybody.

Helping others and saving lives…yeah…those are good memories.

But…but the ones where Natsu would fall asleep on my shoulder by accident, or where the whole guild is fighting like usual…now those are the great memories, and now…and now that I was gone, I just wished that I appreciated it more when I was with them.

Still alive.

I shut my eyes, and unlatched myself from Mavis's grasp.

This is my last time.

That is true, and now…now I think I am finally done letting it all out. I turned towards the guild, and looked over my shoulder at Mavis who was smiling sadly.

"Thank you so much Mavis…" I whispered. Her smile stayed in place, but she giggled slightly. I gave a soft smile, and started to walk towards the guild doors.

Last time.

This is also the last time I have to be strong.

Because I am.

I. Am. Strong.

…

The guild fell into a hushed silence as I walked through the guild doors for what I already knew to be the last time.

Before anyone could say anything, I spoke, walking towards Natsu and Wendy.

"I have to leave now guys," I started.

Almost immediately, shouts of pretests voiced and echoed around the guild, but it was Natsu's who was the loudest and clearest.

"Lucy… please don't go," he begged. He walked towards me, completely broken, and I stared at him, as impassive as I could be. I failed at it.

"Natsu…" I whispered. I shifted my gaze to my feet. I brought my gaze back up to meet his eyes. He was almost right in front of me.

"Natsu, I have to ," I declared, softly. He grasped my shoulders, and I wondered vaguely if he had always been this tall.

"No. You don't," he declared, much louder than me. I just shut my eyes for a brief second, unable to lock gazes with him. Finally, they opened to meet those wonderfully black eyes of his.

"Yeah I do. I'm selfish Natsu. I want to leave. I mean…out of the choices of either staying here, dead, or going off to some afterlife…Natsu I choose the afterlife. I want to be free.

Do…do you know how painful it is staying here, and watching your best friends go on with their lives, miserable at the moment? I want to come back. I want to so badly, but I am dead Natsu. It's…it's just as simple as that," I said. Suddenly, Natsu's grip on my shoulders tightened as he said frantically,

"But what if there's a way to bring you back! I mean. There could be an—"

"Natsu, stop it," I cut it. "You know…you know that's not possible."

His shoulders slumped, and I just leaned against his chest for a few seconds before pulling away. He was still the only one who could actually feel me. The others could only see me and hear me, but for some reason…Natsu could interact with me just like another human being.

I sighed, not letting into crying anymore…plus I didn't feel like it. I guess I really did let out all of my tears earlier on with Mavis…that's good. I don't want to cry in front of them. That would just cause them more pain. I grimaced.

I turned to face everybody else, and breathed in deeply.

"All right guys…I don't want to say good bye, because…I feel as if I say good bye then you'll forget about me, so I'm just going to say, you guys are seriously the best. You gave me a home, a job, support, need, want, love, and most of all…family.

You're my family, every last one of you. And I mean…I'm not happy that I'm dead, but I am, and you and I are just going to have to accept that, and…I have. I hope that you can too…ermm…yeah this is weird, and even…even though now I am trying really hard to not cry, I think I'm about to if I keep talking. Okay wait! First…

Wendy, don't break too many guy's hearts, and also even if there comes a time where you love someone who seems completely wrong…just go with it."

Wendy gave a sad smile as tears fell slowly on her cheeks.

"Erza…you are amazing, and continue to look after all of these boneheads around here, okay? I will miss you so much…" She nodded, and looked away, but I saw the glistening wetness on her cheeks as well.

"Gray…just stop it already with the stripping! Seriously, oh and you need to really get with Juvia already." I smirked, and strained laughs flitted across the room. Juvia started to say something, but I kept talking.

I felt that I didn't have much time…

"Okay…well I know that I don't have much time left, and trust me, I don't know how. Just know…that well…thank you so much for everything."

That's all I had to say, and I walked around, to hug everyone, holding back my tears.

I will not cry.

When I finally reached Natsu, the last hug, we embraced for what seemed forever until I pulled away and said,

"You know… I loved you too Natsu. No…I mean I know that this doesn't make it any easier for you, but I still do love you. You were the best person that I knew and I hope you will always be who you are in the future.

Never change, not for anybody. I don't regret meeting you Natsu, and I do not regret saving your life. I love you, and well…bye Natsu," I practically smiled my words, and I watched as he cried. He opened his mouth and said something, but I couldn't hear anything.

All I saw was myself fading away, and I watched as he started to freak out, crying harder, sobbing.

I gave a tight smile, and I knew that this was the end.

Finally.

I looked down at Natsu, and held my hand to his Fairy Tail mark.

Fairy Tail.

My home.

My family.

Guess what?

I looked down at Natsu again, and he said another thing, but I knew what he said. I smiled. I am Natsu trust me. I am. I love you, and thank you. I closed my eyes, and felt myself fade away into nothing but a haze.

"You're free."

I'm free.

*Oh my god. I finished. I'm done. That was it….I feel a great sense of loss and achievement now that I am finished. I really hope that you liked reading this story as much as I love writing it. I hope that this brought some form of entertainment or tears…or whatever. Thank you dear readers and could you leave a review on what you thought of the story? Please? Well…

Bai guys.

-DiAnna44 :)

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