Step by step

Disclaimer: I do not own The Mortal Instruments or anything like that, all characters are those for Cassandra Clare to have and for us to fantasize about The following occurs shortly after City of Lost Souls.

Clary remembered while she was standing at the threshold of the open gate of the Institute, watching as multiple fires burned within the property the offer Sebastian gave her an entire week before.

It was the day after she had spoken with Jace in the infirmary, she had taken a walk to clear her head, to take some time to herself. She had managed to escape her mother's hold on her, insisting that she look after Luke. Jocelyn was wary of leaving her daughter on her own for even an instant, but she reluctantly allowed Clary to leave under strict rules that she come back and not be out too long.

The New York atmosphere was familiar and reassuring, something she had missed while popping from one place to the next during her time in the house where she had lived with Jace and Sebastion. She visited several comic book stores to enjoy herself, happy that she could actually focus on them instead of having to worry about Shadowhunter world stuff, and whatnot.

I'm just an ordinary, short, red-haired, artistic, manga loving girl, whose here to pass the time, not to fight demons, or open Portals, or fight half-demons that are your brother while having to open Portals…..

After a while she had let herself go, wandering from street to street, looking at everything but not really looking at anything in particular. She was just there, and that was the whole point. Walking past a shop window she saw a glimmer that caught her eye. Stepping closer the glass, she peered in and saw a hairpin in the shape of a rose. The flower was shaped to appear as if in full bloom, and was almost the exact shade of her eyes. She could feel her hands stretching, yearning for not the first time that she her Prismacolor pencils with her, to be able to draw it. Clary felt within herself the sudden girly impulse to buy the hairpin, and quickly rejected it. She was always doing things like this, seeing things so feminine that caught her eye, then deciding that it wouldn't suit her.

After another indecisive glimpse at the shop window, she turned around and headed back home, still seeing the shade of green in her head. Clary winded her way through streets and people, discovering that in her attempt to convince herself that she was here to relax, she hadn't noticed how trafficked the city was. There were cars blaring their horns at each other, people were competing for foot space on the sidewalk, she could hardly move without shoving someone to their doom onto the street.

Deciding to take a short cut, she began to take all the less crowded streets, going through trashed alleys and walking between buildings that were only two feet apart. She let her mind wander, not really knowing where she was going but letting her instincts tell her where to head. After some time Clary began to feel like she was being watched, followed, but not wanting to get tensed up and beat up the poor homeless man who was probably the one stalking her, she let it go.

She was almost home, she could feel it, but she didn't want to arrive just yet, so she circled around, she procrastinated and took slow steps, watching her feet hit the ground like it held meaning. In a strange way, she felt like it did. When your feet hit the ground doesn't it mean that you're going somewhere, have a destination, even though you might not know where exactly it is? When your feet touch the ground and hold it means that you're strong enough to hold you and your troubles up. Taking a step could be the end of something, or the beginning.

She was so caught up in her meaningless jarble that she had undeliberately walked into an alley that dead ended. She stood facing a brick wall, and was turning around to head back when she saw a shadow striding towards her. The sun was directly at the mouth of the alley, so she couldn't see much of the person coming towards her except for their outline. They walked with a straight back, much too confident and with meaning that it couldn't be a hobo. Clary did a quick search on the walls surrounding her for fire escapes or doors that could mean the person simply lived in this building. There were none.

That was it, this person was here for her, and Clary had been too stupid to have not noticed.

What was one beat up hobo? Stupid Clary, Stupid!

As the figure approached, blocking the sun with their back, Clary tried not to gasp or shout as she recognized the white hair, black eyes, tall form that smiled maliciously. Her heart rate accelerated with, what? Fear? Adrenaline? Excitement? Maybe a mix of all three. Until he was standing five feet from her, Clary didn't move, speak, or try to make any facial expression. She was blank, waiting for him to make the first move, to attack her, kill her, pull out another cup and attempt to pour the damned blood that would turn her like him down her throat.

On the outside she betrayed nothing, while on the inside she repelled as he cocked his head slightly to the side, and as Sebastian held out his hand.

"Hello Clarissa, my sweet sister"

Back at the Institute, Clary could see how much damage had been done. The several fires that had gone up, either on accident or purpose or both she couldn't fathom, wrecked much of the place. The grass was ashes, and the walls of the castle like Institute were scorched black with soot. Trees were up in flames and Clary could make out small figures running amongst. Shadowhunters trying to put out the fire, drawing runes for water everywhere they could. Some were fighting each other, much to Clary's confusion until she noticed their black, pit-like eyes.

Sebastian.

He's here. And he's brought more of his cursed anti-Shadowhunters with him. Clary cursed and ran up the path heading towards the stairs, where she could see four new forms dancing in the flames. She held her stele in her hand, having pulled it out unconsciously when she first spotted the smoke in the air on her way over. Isabelle had called her, saying that they had been caught with their guard down, that before they even knew what was going on, already fire was burning and demon Shadowhunters were on the grounds. How they got there, she didn't know. No one knew, and at the moment it didn't matter how they got in, but how to get them out.

As she got near the stairs, the four forms turned into two limp bodies. Clary's eyes widened as she recognized Isabelle, her electrum whip still wrapped in her loose grip, her hair trailing behind her and covering her face like a curtain. She was slumped over carefully, as if before she blacked out she made sure she wouldn't hit her face on the cement stairs.

The other figure didn't fare so well. Alec was barely a hop away from Isabelle, a seraph blade also held limply in his hand, his body was sliding down the steps and his head would have banged down on a step, obviously not the first time based on the blood already seeping through a gash at the back of his head, had she not quickly caught him. He was long and heavy, Clary did her best to pull him up the top of the stairs, and tried to pull him into the open doorway, but was out of breathe soon and found that Isabelle also weigh a ton when she was dead weight. She laid them on the floor just inside, the light flickering from the candles next to the pews.

She drew a healing rune on the inside of each wrist for both brother and sister, and Clary was relieved to see that their wounds and bruises were already starting to fade. Seeing that it would be best that she help out in other areas, she left the siblings, hoping that the fight was mainly going on outside, and ran throughout the madness, drawing water runes here and there, for the fire wasn't backing down.

She helped several fallen Shadowhunters, drawing more healing runes, and helping a man when he was about to be stabbed by a demon Shadowhunter. She could hear human fire trucks in the distant, at first her hopes went up, but quickly plummeted when she realized that all the mortals would see is a filthy church gone up in flames. They wouldn't see what was really going on.

As she jogged around, avoiding tangles of fighting and jumping over fallen trees, she heard a familiar laugh, searching, she found at the back of the Institute, roughly the same area as when she drew a Portal for the first time to get to Alicante, two tall figures. Jace and Sebastian.

Over a week ago, they might have been acting all buddy-buddy, Jace making jokes and Sebastian smirking, pretending to be his friend. But that was all a lie, Jace was no longer under Sebastian's hold, and Jace was never going to forgive him.

Ever.

Standing at a distance, Clary couldn't help but marvel at how alike and different the both seemed. Jace had tan, golden skin, and gold blond hair, while Sebastian's skin was pale, just as his hair was. When she first met Sebastian, his hair had been dyed black, she couldn't but remember Snow White, hair as black as night, skin as white as snow. But this was no house cleaning, singing beauty, this might have been the devil himself. They had both been raised by the same man though, they had the same habits, and knew much of the same techniques.

As she listened closer, she could hear Sebastian speaking, while Jace held a scowl on his face and a lit seraph blade in his hand.

"Come on little brother, you've got to admit, we made a pretty good team, you and I, I mean, look at what we accomplished all on our own," Sebastian said.

"Oh, you mean when you had me zombified and I was your happy little servant, pleased to do what master said?" Jace retorted, managing to sound like he meant it, "Gee, I think anyone would work well with anyone as long as they're their puppet!"

"Oh, details, details. You know, I didn't come here to tie you to me anymore, why would I need such a weak link, you were easily swayed, especially by her"

"You say one word about Clary and I swear I'll beat your as-"

"Really? I don't think so, you see, Clary and I are siblings, therefore I can say whatever I want," Sebastian was playing with him, pushing his buttons, trying to make him angry to the point where he's unfocused.

"Did you know," Sebastian continued, seeming to ignore or not care when Jace lifted his seraph blade, "that I kissed Clary? Not just in Alicante when you two were having your arguments, but at home too, you should have seen us, we practically broke the glass table."

Sebastian barely got the last word out when Jace lunged at him, having had enough.

They fought fiercely, slashing at each other, Sebastian having pulled out a seraph blade sometime throughout the fight. At first, they both seemed evenly matched, but then Jace was getting backed up against the wall, he was still recovering and therefore not completely up for the match, but his anger at the time didn't let him see that.

Before Clary knew it, Sebastian had Jace by the neck, pinning him to the wall, both seraph blades were on the ground, and Jace pawed furiously at the hands that gripped him, but to no avail. As Sebastian squeezed tighter, Clary's mind raged back towards the week before.

"What do you want Sebastian?" Clary's voice sounded normal, what any sister would say to her brother, but she still could hear her undertone, what does he want!? What is he going to do!?

"Can't a brother come and accompany his younger sister anymore?" he asked, hurt. "You know Clary, it's awfully dangerous for you to be out here all alone, someone could follow you and treat so badly." He smiled at that last part

"We both know that's not your intention," Clary could still feel the desperate need to escape from then, when Sebastian pressed his lips unto hers back then. The sick feeling. "Now, what do you want?" This time she dropped all normalness and let her disgust trickle through her words.

"I've been thinking a lot Clary, remember the question you asked me? Back in Paris? Who did I belong to? Remember, I belong to you, and you belong to me."

"That's absurd, I don't belong to anyone but myself!" And Jace

"But Clary, don't you see, we are alike, brother and sister separated their entire lives and brought back together in harsh times, it's destiny! Clary, you must come with me, we could be together at last, no rules, nothing to hold back, I could show you everything, give you anything, can't you see that with me you're better off than with them, if you stay with me you'll be safer." Sebastian's eyes had softened, his smile gone, he sounded sincere, so sincere, that it took every ounce of willpower for Clary to remember that Sebastian was nothing but a monster taught to fake emotions.

"No, Sebastian, if I go with you, it'll only be hell," Clary tried to walk past him, but his hand shot out and gripped her upper arm.

"Let me g-,"Clary started to say.

"If you go, I'll destroy them, everyone. I can have everything Clarissa, but the one thing I don't have is you."

"I said let me go!"

"Even if I do let you go you'll just run, and I'll catch you, come with me-"

"Let go of my arm!"

"Claris-"

"JONATHAN. CHRISTOPHER. MORGENSTERN," She spoke each name like they were the last things she wanted to say, "Let go of my arm, now!" Her voice was filled with ice, and her eyes were cold as she stared into her brother's coal black eyes.

Slowly, without breaking eye contact, he let her go, but as soon as she turned her back toward him and took a step, he wrapped her arms around her waist and held her to his back.

"Sebastian!" Clary writhed around, using her elbow to jab at his weak points but he wouldn't budge.

"You said arm, not waist," he chuckled into her hair, his face pressing against her neck, "I'm giving you a choice, my Clarissa, come with me, and I won't ever bother your friends and family ever again, be mine."

"And if I refuse? Are you just gonna take me anyway?" she had stopped fighting, seeing as it was better to not waste her energy. Even if he was broken and bleeding he wouldn't let go.

"It's an offer, one that you can make at any time, just say that you'll come with me, and all that you care for will be spared."

It was tempting. Her whole existence felt like a burden on everyone, she always felt like she was doing the wrong thing, why risk everyone else's lives just because she didn't want to go with him. But still. They'd never accept it, if they were all here, Jocelyn, Luke, Isabelle, Jace, Alec, Magnus, even Maryse, they'd all tell her no, that they'd rather fight to their last breath than just sacrifice her off for their protection.

"I'm sorry Sebastian, I really am, but I'm going to have to decline your offer."

She could feel him smirk. "Don't make the choice now, remember, you make it any time you want."

Any time you want…

His words vibrated in her mind like a broken record, scratching over and over her thoughts as she tried to figure out what she was going to do. She still hadn't revealed herself to the two, should she fight? If she sneaked behind him, she could pick up one of the seraph blades and stab him in the back, Sebastian could fight Jace in his recovering state, and Clarissa had fought well enough against him on her own, maybe the two of the together could bring him down.

That still wouldn't solve everything else, they needed to know how to put out the fires, and to call off the other demon Shadowhunters. They needed his cooperation, and they needed it now.

Clary made her mind before she could change it.

"JONATHAN CHRISTOPHER MORGENSTERN!"

Everything froze. Sebastian's grip on Jace, Jace's struggling, the fire, everything stopped when Sebastian turned his face and met her eyes. Clary expected to see resentment, hate, anger, and the urge to kill in those eyes.

What she saw was what also froze her heartbeat. Sebastian's eyes lit up, like they found hope in a place full of darkness, his muscles relaxed, his expression softened and his mouth smiled like she was the first thing he ever hoped for.

He was happy to see her.

"Clary," the word left his lips like a prayer, as if he spent nights repeating it again and again. Clary's heart dropped when she realized that maybe he did.

"Sebastian, I….I…..," she looked down, was she really going to do this?

She swallowed. Forgive me, Jace

She lifted her head and met Sebastian's eyes "I accept your offer."

Sebastian seemed to stop. Then his lips lifted in the most bursting smile. It was gorgeous, and Clary hated to admit it. He let go of Jace's neck, making Jace slump down and cough, while peering up at Clary in astonishment. Sebastian managed to walk towards her in the fraction of an instant, stopping just in front if her.

"You mean it?" he asked, worry tingeing his bewilderment.

Clary nodded.

"Clary, wait!" Jace was standing now, his voice was hoarse, his hand had found a seraph blade and was pointing it straight at Sebastian, "You don't have to accept anything this thing made to you to save me, I'd rather die than lose you!"

"It's not just you she's saving, it's everyone. Despite what you may think not everything revolved around you Jace," Sebastian said, not sounding like he cared really, like we wasn't even talking to Jace, He hadn't taken his eyes off of her for a second.

"I'm sorry, Jace" Clary croaked, trying to stop her eyes from welling with tears as Sebastian wrapped an arm across her shoulders.

Sebastian's eyes had returned to their evil, blood thirsty intent, and looked at Jace like he was filth.

"Don't worry little brother, I'll take very good care of our little shared love," as he said this, Clary felt like she was slipping into darkness, the last thing she could remember was Jace yelling out her name.

Claaaaryyyy….

Clary woke to an echo of a scream that came from her dreams.

"Jace?" she sat up, expecting Jace to be seating in a chair next to the bed, reading a book that she had fallen asleep to while he read aloud to her, as he had done so many times.

But he wasn't there.

Clary was in an unfamiliar room, laying in what was the largest bed she had ever seen. It could have easily taken up her entire room a Luke's. There were posts on the four corners of the bed, holding up what appeared to be a pole that held curtains that would wound around and conceal the bed if done.

For a large room, it was mostly empty. There was a large vanity mirror, a dressing drawer, a large wicker chair that faced a window whose curtains were closed, and a door that led into a bathroom. The floor was carpeted with fluffy green, so Clary didn't even bother to find her shoes as she slipped out of the bed.

She was still in her clothes from the battle, her red hoodie, covered in soot and smelled of smoke, and her black jeans. She was wearing her green sketchers, and would look for them later. She felt dirty, so decided to take a quick shower, but first she rummaged through the dressing drawer, and found t-shirts of all colors, as well as hoodies, jeans, all in her size.

There was even a packet of socks, underwear and bras that must have been recently bought. Clary tried not to think of how creepy it was that they were also in her size.

She took a change of clothes, a showered quickly, running the warm water through her tangled hair, and rubbing soap over her, trying to get rid of the scent of the fire. When she was out, now dressed in a yellow T-shirt and blue jeans, she walked out the door in search of, what? She had no idea where she was.

She was hungry, that's for sure, yet the thought that she just abandoned everyone she cared for made the idea of food seem revolting. She had to figure out where she was, and if she could get out.

I have to figure out where Sebastian is.

Clary creeped out of the room, and into the hallway, which was also covered in the lush green carpet. Clary was thankful, for the carpet muffled her steps. The hallway led both left and right, yet to the right it dead ended. So she chose to move left, where the hallway stopped and the ceiling angled down. She assumed there would be stairs there.

She was right. The stairs led down into an enormous room that served both as a kitchen and living room, a long bar separating the two. There was a comfy looking couch with a coffee table set in front of it and a large plasma screen T.V that was mounted on the wall that couch was facing. Simple. The kitchen was basic as well, the chrome refrigerator, the sink, and wide counter to cook on. There was a microwave, a toaster, blender, stove, just about everything. Even a juicer.

Clary was just about to head towards the promising looking door that might take her outside, when two arms encircled her and pressed her back into a warm hug.

"Good morning Clarissa," Sebastian greeted her by whispering this into her ear, his breathe hot.

She tried not to recoil. "Good morning Sebastian," she was glad he couldn't see her face.

"Now, let's talk about that first, shall we?" Without letting go of her, he walked them towards the couch, and he released her to sit down. He sat facing her, one elbow propped against the couch, the other resting by his leg.

"Talk about what?" Clary sat with her hands in her lap.

"My name. Now that I think about it, I like it when you call me Jonathan Christopher, instead of Sebastian."

"You want me to call you something else?" Clary was stunned. She was expecting for Sebastian to want to use her right away, to have his way with her, like he said right before they left the other house, the one she got rid of. Speaking of which…..

"Where are we?"

Sebastian blinked, then smirked . "I can never get you off of what you want can I? Well if you must know, I encountered another one of our houses, and allow me to tell this to you now Clary, if you even pull another one of your rune tricks, I will command those under my power to make another assault on your precious Institute."

He was still smirking, as if he had planned it all out. Typical.

"And how are you going to do that?" She asked.

"A guy's gotta have his secrets," he replied, "But enough about that, yes, you can call me some other name, preferably Jonathan Christopher."

"Well, why don't I give you a nickname, like Jace has," she didn't know where she was getting at, here she was, away from the people she cares about, practically trapped, and she was going to give Sebastian a nickname.

It was ridiculous, yet felt normal. Sebastian was making it easy, so Clary was going to along with it. Jace was called Jace because of his initials, she assumes, since he was also named Jonathan Christopher. But what name to give Sebastian?

"A nickname?" Sebastian tilted his head slightly to the side.

"Yeah, like John, or maybe I can just call you Christopher, you know I think I like Chris. Yeah, I like Chris, you kind of look like a Chris," she was babbling, but if it was what he wanted Clary might as well try.

"Chris? Hmm, it does sound nice. Chris." He was smiling, like he actually appreciated the fact that she was helping him a get new identity.

He stood up, and paced around the coffee table. "Chris, Chris, Chris, yes, I like it. Chris."

He faced her, in front of the T.V, and beamed at her. "Well then, that settles that."

"That's it?" Clary stood up, "That's it, just Chris? Shouldn't you do some paperwork or something?"

"Oh Clary, we won't be working under anything like that, to you I am Chris, and that's it, don't you see, this is the beginning of something new, new start, new life, new name. You're free to change your name too if you want."

Change my name? "No thank you, I like Clary just fine."

"Suit yourself," Sebas- Or Chris now, she guessed, shrugged and sat down on the couch again, reached for the coffee table for the remote, and switched on the screen.

Clary sat down as well as Chris flicked through channels.

"Didn't the last house not get any channels?" she asked.

"Yes, well, I had that arranged as you can see." He said, not taking his eyes off the screen.

"Yeah, but," Clary let the topic drop. His name is Chris. We have T.V. Weeeee

As they sat together and watched T.V, Clary felt herself relax, despite the fact that she kept telling herself that Chris was a demon, he did not feel human emotion, did not laugh at funny shows, feel sadness when someone died in a movie (and they watched several) he did not feel obliged to help someone when they were looking for the popcorn in the cabinets, it was simply not real.

Yet he was doing it. Whether it was acting, or just that he was getting into the vibe like she was, Clary couldn't know.

It was getting late, or at least she felt it was getting late, judging that she hadn't seen the outside world at all, when she started to feel her eyelids getting heavy. She urged them open, not wanting to fall asleep. She tried to focus on things, details that required her concentration, the hand of an actress on the T.V, the hand of the clock in the kitchen, the slight twitch in her fingers, when she found herself staring at Chris's eyelashes.

Why are they so long! Just like Jocelyn's, I don't have long eyelashes, it's not fair….

"Why are you staring at me like that?" Chris had paused the movie to a scene where the actors were in a high speed chase on a highway. "You look like you're trying not to have a fit."

"It's not fair." She voiced her complaint aloud.

"What is?" He readjusted himself so that his whole body faced her.

"Your eyelashes! They're so damn long it's not fair! Why couldn't I get that! I have short, ugly, eyelashes, it's not possible! And….freckles! You don't have a single one! Look at me! I'm like a kid's connect-the-dots, why don't you have any freckles!"

Clary stared at him, her lips in a pout, only slightly regretful that she had let herself open up to Chris.

All of a sudden a laugh bubbled out from Chris' lips. He doubled over, unable to contain himself, Clary could only watch in astonishment, and then tried to remain angry, but couldn't as a smile crept onto her expression as she taunted him, "What's so funny? Huh?" she threw a pillow that she was leaning against at him.

He let it hit him, and when he managed to calm down, he said, "You! The fact that you'd get mad over something like that! Honestly, I didn't even notice I had long eyelashes, much less that yours were short."

"How can you not notice? Do you know how much girls hate-love guys with long eyelashes!" Clary shouted, though she had to admit, she didn't even sound remotely upset.

"Hate-love?" Chris asked, "Why would they both hate and love it? Can't they just decide?"

"They hate it because boys don't necessarily need long eyelashes, and girls with short eyelashes will hate them for that, for example, moi, but they love it because boys with long eyelashes look good," Clary stated, matter-of-factly.

"This love-hate, hate-love, is a very simple thing really, not everything is perfect, therefore while you can love something or someone, it or they may have a default that causes you trouble or that you just don't like, alcohol and drugs for one are an excellent proof of this, because people love the high of it, but when they're dropped back down they feel like dump." Clary sat back, slightly pleased that she was able to explain something in a way that made sense.

She glanced at Chris, waiting for him to nod in agreement.

He however, had apparently zoned off, and when she met his gaze he said, "So what I'm hearing is, I look good because of my long eyelashes, enough to make girls jealous, even you?" He smiled contently, "Don't be jealous Clary, you have your own traits, for one, do you know how many people would kill for your green eyes?"

Clary hadn't actually thought about that. Well she had, she knew that she liked her eyes, and that people that they were pretty, but she never considered people to be jealous of her for it.

She shook her head, telling Chris she didn't know. "Well," he continued, "Now you do. And your freckles, you may hate them, but they make you special, I like your freckles." He said that with a low tone, his laughing tone gone. Clary could feel the mood around them change from happy, bubbly, joking siblings, to something deeper, more intimate.

The change made her stomach drop.

Suddenly nauseous, she stood up, "Well thank you Chris, I think I'll head back up and sleep, I'm tired." She did what she hoped was a convincing yawn, and headed towards the stairs, when she felt his presence behind her.

"I'll come with you," He placed his hand at her elbow, and she tried not to recoil. Despite the fact that they had spent the entire day together, they hadn't made any physical contact, which she was grateful for and was probably why she allowed herself to loosen up. But now, his touch on her revived all the old feelings. Disgust, hate, the desperate need to get away, that this wasn't right. He was a demon, one that would stop at nothing to have her, all he wanted was her, no matter what.

She attempted her best at shrugging him off politely, "That's alright Chris, I can find the room I was in on my own."

Clary walked up the stairs, but by the time she was on the second floor, Chris had gripped her upper arm. "Please Clary, let me come with you, I'm asking you."

Clary could feel him wanting her. This was it, the reason why Chris had wanted her to come. This whole time she knew, that this was inevitable, that Chris' sick, twisted mind could only hold its act for so long, and that the demon within him would rage against her. The feelings she'd been trying to pent up were breaking through with a torrent of thoughts.

Why did I come here? Why did I take his offer!? I should have stayed and fought alongside Jace, we could have handled Chr-, no at that time he was still Sebastian. We could have done it, I know we would have. Why was I so stupid!

You did it for them The reasonable part of said, you did it for your love of the people you cherish, don't forget about the sacrifices and losses they've had for you.

Chris stared at her as if he could read her every thought, and without giving her much choice, he said "Come with me" and dragged her down the hallway, and opened a door just two away from the one she awoke in this morning.

He showed her in, and closed the door behind him. Closed and locked. The door could only be unlocked on the outside, while on the inside you would need a key. How they were getting out, Clary's mind begged how.

"Why'd you lock the door?" she demanded as her hand flew automatically to the chain around her neck that held Jace's ring.

"Just in case," Chris walked towards the giant bed that dominated the room, which was in much the same decor as the one Clary was in. Clary didn't budge. When Chris noticed, he sighed, "Clary, you know what you came here for."

He strode towards her, and placed his hands on her shoulders, to hold her or make sure she didn't make a break for it and suicide herself by jumping out the window, which was free of curtains and gave her the first view of outdoors all day, revealing a night sky jotted with stars, Clary wasn't sure.

"Come on Clary, join me in bed." Clary's feet moved like a robot, almost against her will, but she was controlling them. There must be something she could do, something to prevent this.

Clary sat at the edge of the bed, while Chris kneeled down and removed her socks, "They're too hot for me and frankly I don't like them while sleeping," he claimed.

He stood up and was looking deeply into her eyes, leaning closer, when Clay blurted out, "What happened after we left?"

"What?" he asked. His eye widened in a confused, stare. "Oh, after you accepted my offer, I used trinket I have that opens a Portal between where I stand, and the house. And in case you're wondering, it only works on getting it, not out."

"And then, what about the demon Shadowhunters, the fires?" she was eager now to know, but it also served as a distraction to Chris, as well as dragging on the time while Clary thought about how to work her way out of this one.

"Oh, well I command the demon Shadowhunters, as you call them, when my presence was no longer there, they left, and will await my commands for any further plans, if I don't tell them to do anything, then they won't do anything. As for the fires, I used dark magic to control them, I put them out as soon as we left."

"Oh." Clary's guilt lessened. At least now she didn't have to worry about abandoning her friends in the middle of battle.

"Now that your questions are all answered…."he dragged that on, as if waiting for anything else she wanted to know, and she desperately tried to think of one, but in the moment she couldn't think of any except for HOW DO I GET OUT OF HERE?!

Chris was staring at her again, and he leaned down, and Clary couldn't take it anymore. Anymore of the fighting, the holding her ground, she was a Shadowhunter, but she wasn't as powerful as the rest of the people who grew up knowing that they were Shadowhunters. Clary thought maybe if he just let it happen, it wouldn't be as bad as she thought. Get it over with, she could do it. She would let her mind wander, like she did so many times before she discovered what she was, who she was. She remembered walking around in mindless states, with Simon having to jostle her out of her world to knock her into the present. She could have gone hours back then in her own world without noticing, but that was before everything changed, and Clary was required to focus.

But now, maybe she could do it again. There was nowhere to go, she could lose herself in her mind.

And it worked, on one level, she could feel Chris, his body heat radiating off of him, his fingers trailing her cheekbones, down her throat and straight through the middle of her breasts. Could feel his fingers caressing her back, and she could feel her body responding, giving off sighs, shudders, and the arching of her back where his fingers touched. He wasn't doing anything yet, he was simply touching. Then he began to kiss her forehead, the back of her hand, her wrist, taking his time, for she now belonged to him, and they had all the time they could ever need. They were both sitting on the bed now, and he had managed to get her to sit in his lap, his arms traveling up and down her spine, moving her raid hair to the side so he could kiss the back of her neck, but soon she could hear his breath getting heavier, anticipation wearing down on him.

Clary knew this, but wasn't entirely aware. In her mind, it was Jace that was with her, and Jace was simply holding her, whispering little things to her in her ear, making her smile. Suddenly, Clary remembered something, a night where she and Jace had slept together, her in a nightgown, and he was reading when she entered the room. She remembered asking him if they could just sleep that night. Just sleep.

Chris was getting more savaged, he was kissing her neck with more passion now. He shifted from sitting position, turned Clary around so that he was kneeling in front of her, and grabbed the front of her shirt and tore it down the middle. Clary gasped, more automatically than actually caring, she was still in her world. Chris yanked off his shirt as well, looked at Clary with his flushed face.

"If I wanted to, I'd count each and every one of your freckles, and tell you why each one was special, but right now, I'm afraid looking at you isn't just gonna cut it for me."

Chris grabbed her, and in absolute lust and fury, pressed his lips down unto hers.

That snapped Clary. In a jolt, she went from her pleasant mind-world, to a world where she and Chris were shirtless, in a bed, and furiously kissing.

No.

She was frozen. Chris had pushed her down so that he was on top of her, his hands on both her arms, holding her, and his legs pressing between hers, pulling them apart.

NO

He was reaching for her pants, still not breaking the kiss and fumbling with the button, Clary noticed his were already sliding down his waist.

NO!

That was it. Clary panicked and violently turned her face to the side, so that Chris was stuck kissing into her ear. He reared back, eyes full of want, need. Of her.

"Clary, what-" his voice was breathless, also filled with lust.

"Chris, let's just sleep." Clary said evenly.

"What," he asked bewildered, "No, you can't do this now, not now! You belong to me now!" He tried to reach for her again, but his reflexes were slower, his movements shaky. Clary however, was rock steady.

"Yes, that was our agreement, I stay with you, therefore, I belong to you," she took a breath, "but that means that we have a lot of time together, and I don't want to go through this so quickly, please Chris, do it for me, let's take this step by step."

Clary walked over to the dressing drawer, found a random shirt that was too large, and pulled it on. She walked back to Chris, and placed her hand in his, suddenly sure in what she was doing.

"Step by step, I promise you, for every step, it'll be better," she smiled a true, genuine smile.

Chris was taken aback, he was slumped, like a child whose toy was taken away, but perked up when she smiled. So he smiled.

"Jace, did you do this with Jace too?" he asked.

"Yes. I told Jace to sleep, so we slept." She answered.

"Oh." Was his only comment.

So that night, Clary and Chris slept in the same bed, Clary's back to Chris' stomach, Chris with his arm across Clary, and with a faint smile on his lips that he swore he never slept with before.

Chris's last thoughts before he slept, I'm not alone anymore, I found the angel to balance my demon…..

What did you think? Comment, REVIEW. Please do so nicely, but tell me if I rushed the ending too much. This is my first fanfiction so I'm crossing my fingers!