Hello, again. Original chapter for you today. Once again, sorry for the long wait. Hopefully you...

Enjoy.

"What gives, Sock Head?" Eddy asked as he and Ed followed behind his friend. "The dorm's back that way." The smartest Ed didn't turn to acknowledge his friend, who pointed a thumb in the opposite direction that the trio was walking in. Instead, he continued to lead his friends towards his intended location, not even bothering to explain his intentions.

"Double D's been acting weird toady, Eddy," Ed whispered to his friend.

"Some news flash, Lumpy," Eddy quietly retorted. "The only people he's talked to are the teachers and Algie, and I have no idea what the heck he wanted to talk to him for."

"Don't forget," Ed began to add. "Double D also skipped lunch today."

"Everyone except you skipped lunch today," the shortest Ed muttered. As he turned his attention back towards his sock-headed friend, he noticed that he led them to the front of a building they had passed by time and time again, but never bothered entering. Much like the boys dormitories, it was a rectangular building with stone walls and a similar roof. Where it differed was that this building's entrance was much nicer than boys' dormitory, as well as the fact that it had no distinguishable windows anywhere. Eddy looked up to read the sign above the archway, realizing that it read, "Library".

"What are we doing here, Double D?" Eddy asked.

"Are we gonna get a magic spell book that will tell us how to extend our ammo capacities by giving us spells to write onto a sandcastle floor, with the secret bonus that'll allow us to turn into a washing machine?" Ed inquired. While Eddy didn't hesitate to give his friend a bewildered stare, Double D didn't respond in any manner to correct his friend. His silent and stern demeanor was more than evident that, even though his friends couldn't see his face, Ed and Eddy could easily tell that their friend was hiding something from them.

"Ed, stop him," Eddy commanded. Ed gave a nod and trotted after his sock-headed friend, scooping him into a bear hug with relative ease. He made sure to hold back his strength enough to keep Double D from squirming out of his grasp without causing him any pain.

"Ed!" Double D exclaimed. "Release me at once!"

"Not until you answer some questions, Sock Head," Eddy replied before Ed could register his captive's order. "What's with you? You've been acting weird ever since we left Tad's house yesterday." Ed and Eddy noticed that their friend's face switched from frantic strain to stern reflection, his mind reflecting on how he had suffered at the hands of Tad and his friends and how much it had hurt not only his head, but his pride. While the smartest Ed believed himself as being above petty feelings of revenge, he soon realized that he was quite wrong.

"…If you release me, fellows, I'll be sure to tell you my full plan," he sighed. Ed looked towards Eddy, who appeared to be satisfied with his friend's answer. The shortest Ed gave his strong friend a nod, who happily released his friend from his grasp. After taking a second to dust off his sweater vest and adjusting his hat, he turned to his friends.

"Yesterday, before we began our journey back to campus, remember when I remarked that we should become more skilled in combat in the event we face another fight against the Preps?" he asked, pausing to wait for his friends to give him an affirming nod. "Naturally, we know that Ed's relationship with his master will ensure he lives up to this requirement. Eddy and I, however, are at a disadvantage in close quarters combat…with me running the largest risk in any and all possible circumstances that I find myself in a situation like that."

"If you're talking about Parker, then why do you need to worry?" Eddy asked. "All we gotta do next time is stick by ya to make sure you can keep your distance. Then when they're weak, me and Ed'll take care of the rest of 'em." Double D responded to his friend's plan with a solemn shake of his head.

"You and I both know that it's not always going to be that easy," he told his friend. "So, I talked to Algernon about what the library had to offer in aids, and he informed me that we could use its resources to learn new techniques."

"So what you're saying is that we can become strong enough to take those spoiled jerks on if we go to the library?" Eddy asked, only to grow a large grin. "Why didn't you say so in the first place? Let's go!" The shortest Ed took the lead, enthusiastically walking up the stairs to the door. Double D didn't seem to mind his friend's newfound enthusiasm and dutifully followed him into the library. While Ed followed behind his friends, he appeared to adopt Double D's look of concern.

"Guys, can I use the library too?" Ed asked his friends. This halted Double D's and Eddy's steps on the staircase so they could acknowledge their friend's request.

"I thought that your master was training you in new moves," Double D commented.

"Yeah, Monobrow," Eddy added. "That was the first time you did that weird flipping headbutt thing, right? Didn't that hobo teach you that one?"

"You know that Master hates wrestling," Ed explained. "If he knew I still do that, he'd stop training me. Besides, he won't train me anything new unless I give him a radio, and I haven't found any around here in weeks."

"Then where did you learn how to do that move?" Double D inquired.

"A wrestling match," Ed explained. "The guy I copied was fighting a guy who used a lot of moves the Preppies use, and he won by staying close, grapple attacks, and submission holds. I only remember that one match, though, and it was too long ago to remember all the moves he used." Eddy and Double D looked back at each other, the shortest one giving a shrug and the smartest one turning to show Ed a friendly smile.

"I believe there is a computer somewhere inside that you can use to watch more matches like that," he offered, causing the strongest Ed to grin from ear to ear.

"Oh boy!" he cheered, making a dash past his friends and through the double doors. Eddy and Double D politely strolled in, noticing the musty smell of older books as it hit their nostrils with full force. They walked past the threshold of the building to see two rows of reading desks, each with at least one of the Astronomy Club doing their homework. Naturally, the walls were lined with books, so many that the second story alcove's shelves reached the ceiling, giving the impression that the walls themselves were made of books. The boys soon found their friend at the librarian's desk, eagerly bouncing up and down in front of the woman.

"Watch the match! Watch the match! Watch the match!" he shouted, causing the students in the area to look up from their notes with annoyed looks in their faces. The librarian didn't hesitate to raise her finger to her lips and shush the boy.

"I'll ask you to keep silent in the library, young man, or I'll have you removed from the building at once," she warned Ed, who obliged by placing his hand over his mouth. "The computer is over in the back corner." Ed gave a friendly nod and hurriedly walked back towards the corner she told him about. As he left her presence, he was quickly replaced by his friends.

"Pardon me, ma'am," Double D began, "I was wondering where I could find a book on either combative history or techniques."

"You'll have to be more specific, young man," the middle aged woman replied. "We have quite a few books on that subject." Double D looked towards Eddy, silently asking him what they should look for exactly. Eddy, acting as he understood what his friend was wondering, gave a passive shrug.

"Your plan, your choice," he said simply. With that statement, Double D quickly pondered on what struck his interest the most. After a moment of reflection, he recalled how he had fended off an attacker before he received a slingshot, and came to his decision.

"Perhaps a book on swordsmanship would be more than sufficient," Double D said. The librarian turned to her computer and, with a few keystrokes, began her search for what the boy sought.

"…Just as I feared…" she muttered, catching the attention of Eddy and Double D. "The library only carries one book on swords, and that book has been overdue for weeks. Not to mention the waiting list on checking that book out."

"Who would keep a book on swords that long?" Eddy wondered aloud.

"It's a surprise he's kept it this long…" the librarian continued to speak to herself. "If he's avoiding paying a late fee, it still wouldn't make sense, with what his family makes."

"Well, that narrows it down, doesn't it?" Double D wondered aloud. "If you give us the name of the one who has the book, we'll be more than happy to return it to its rightful home." This offer seemed to please the librarian enough for her to oblige the sock-headed teen.

"Well, seeing as how you're offering to help," she began. "The boy who took the book is Parker Olgive." The mentioning of the Preppie who had injured and instilled the sense of humiliation into Double D sent him into a state of newfound determination. The shortest Ed, however, began to look annoyed.

"That chump?" Eddy asked. "Tell you what, lady. We'll take care of Parker and in exchange, we get first dibs on the book. Deal?" Normally, the librarian wouldn't allow herself to be spoken to by a student like that. However, her desire to regain normalcy in her library overweighed her morals. After taking a few moments to ponder the short boy's offer, she gave them a nod.

"You have a deal," she said. "You'll have one week with the book before I'll expect its return. Best of luck." She turned back to her work, leaving Double D and Eddy to plan their next move.

"What do you say, Sock Head?" Eddy asked. "You wanna grab Ed and go after Parker now?"

"I agree that we should take care of Parker posthaste," the smartest Ed began. "However, I believe that we can leave Ed here to watch his matches while we take care of the issue." Eddy's eyes shot wide at the mentioning of leaving the strongest member of their group behind, thinking that his friend had finally lost his mind.

"Guess I got some junk in my ears, or the fumes in this place must be getting to ya, 'cause it sounded like you wanted to go without big Ed," Eddy commented, scratching the inside of his ear to further accentuate his comment.

"Just trust me on this one, Eddy," the smartest Ed said. "I believe that Ed will only scare him away, making things more difficult for us in the end. As a matter of fact, the only reason I'm not going alone is because I need you to make sure that he doesn't try to run off again."

"Geez…way to make a guy feel wanted, Double D," Eddy muttered, shoving his hand into his pockets.

"I know that this seems a bit outside our norms, but I beg of you to trust me," the sock-headed teen pleaded with his friend. Eddy, after a few seconds of contemplating, waved his hand flippantly.

"Like I said, it's your plan," the de facto leader of the Eds told his friend. "Lead the way."

"Thank you, Eddy," Double D said. "Now, first things first, I'll need to procure two yard sticks from the school store, so we'll need to pay for them. We'd better hurry before the store closes." He wasted no time in heading out through the library doors, leaving his friend to follow behind.

"First he wants to take the hard way out, now he wants me to cough up cash for his plan," Eddy grumbled as he started to follow his friend's path. "This stupid book better be worth it…"

"SIX FREAKIN' DOLLARS?!" Eddy shouted at the top of his lungs. "Highway robbery! All for a couple pieces of wood?" Eddy's penny pinching past had him hesitant to spend any money on things that he didn't deem worthy, and the school's store didn't help that they charged a ridiculous "convenience fee" for their goods. His sock-headed friend walked alongside him, holding in his hand the yard sticks that had put Eddy into the fit he was in.

"We haven't been spending that much since we've arrived to Bullworth, Eddy," Double D said in an attempt to calm his friend. "Not to mention, we've made more money in our time here than our entire tenure scamming the kids in Peach Creek." Eddy couldn't help but shoot his friend a dirty look at that statement, even though he knew that they had made more than enough money doing favors around campus.

"Fine…I'm treating this like an investment, Sock Head Samurai," the shortest Ed told his friend. "Either you become the world's greatest swordfighter, or you're gonna hafta convince the hobo to take you in."

"While I'm sure master status would take many years of practice in order to achieve, I'll ensure my best effort," Double D assured his friend. "Ah, we've arrived." The two Eds stopped to look at Harrington House for the first time in daylight, taking notice of what private investment could do for the privileged children.

"Ok, we'll wait out here for Parker," Double D began, grabbing Eddy's attention. "You hide in the grass lot on the side of the building, while I wait out here behind this light post. Once I see him, I'll confront him about the book. When you hear me call out for you, come out of hiding and position yourself between him and the doors." Eddy began to look towards the side lot, recalling that it was also the residence of the area of the dog that they had fed rancid meat and caused extreme gastric distress.

"But that mutt's still there!" Eddy complained. "He's gonna want revenge for the Halloween prank!"

"I'm sure that Chester's forgotten all about that, Eddy," Double D said. "His attention span wouldn't possibly have allowed him to link any of us to that one incident." While the shortest Ed still looked nervously over his shoulder, the smartest Ed noticed a familiar figure moving behind the window towards the main doors.

"He's coming! Quick, Eddy. Hide!" The sock headed teen gave a quick shove with just enough strength to maneuver his friend into the lot. Eddy refrained from letting out a shout and ducked behind the wall, keeping a careful eye on Double D who stood defiantly in between the exit path and the door to Harrington House, with nothing but a yard stick in his hand.

Sock Head… Eddy thought. What the hell are you thinking? Did the school make you get dumb or something? While the de facto leader of the Eds pondered his friend's sudden change in character, he failed to notice a familiar, four legged friend emerging from his slumber and take notice of a scent he hadn't smelled since Halloween.

Meanwhile, Double D waited patiently as the doors opened and Parker stepped outside, holding his book bag in his hand. At first, the sight of his opponent from the day before caught him off guard. However, his anxiety was quickly curtailed due to the realization that his friends were nowhere to be found. This prompted the usual arrogance that came naturally to him and his friends.

"Well, well, well…" the Preppie said with a smirk. "I'm surprised that someone as supposedly smart as you would make a stupid mistake like this." Double D refused to allow Parker's insults and cavalier attitude to take any effect on his demeanor, merely acknowledging the words with a stern glare.

"It has come to my attention that, besides being a spoiled coward, you are also a negligent hoarder as well," the smartest Ed retorted, taking a small amount of pleasure that Parker was smart enough to understand his insult.

"J-just what gives you the right to say that about me?!" Parker exclaimed.

"You have in your possession a library book that is long overdue," Double D explained, pointing the yardsticks towards the bag. "And if I haven't made it clear, I'm here to on behalf of the librarian to collect." The prep gave a quick glance towards his book bag and immediately remembered how he had forgotten about returning the book. Even though he didn't care about the fine he most definitely had to pay, he quickly decided that if Double D wanted the book then it would be worth a few more trivial nickels just to keep him from it.

"So, you poor folk are so desperate for money that you'll take any job that comes your way?" Parker taunted. "Well, like my father says, 'Never hire a fool for a job he can't do.' It looks like that old hag isn't smart enough to know that she obviously hired the weakest fool in Bullworth for this task. Sorry, old sport, but you're the last person I'd give this book to. So, as I've more important matters to attend to, I bid you farewell."

This is bad, Double D thought to himself. I better call for Eddy now… As the smartest Ed thought about enacting his backup plan, Eddy had been silently watching from the side lot. His every instinct had been telling him to jump to his friend's aid, but had managed to follow Double D's plan. The shortest Ed's focus, however, was too narrow as he failed to notice a familiar four-legged friend walking up behind him. Chester, fortunately for Eddy, recognized him as an innocent bystander to the Halloween incident, and in an act of good will, gave the boy a customary canine greeting. The action, however, caught the Ed's de facto leader by extreme surprise.

"YEEAAAARRRGGHH!" Eddy screamed as a wet nose brushed against the seat of his pants. His cry of terror managed to drive the dog back into his home, with the added effect of drawing Double D's and Parker's attention. Figuring that he needed to make the most of the improvisation, Eddy quickly placed himself between the Preppie and Harrington House's front door, pulling a stink bomb that he always carried in his pocket out with a confident smirk.

"Goin' somewhere, Trust Fund Chump?" he sarcastically inquired as he casually played toss with his weapon of choice. On the inside, Parker began to fret with worry over whether or not the Ed's infamous muscle would jump from the sky and pummel him, he refused to allow someone of his social stature to show fear in front of a lower class.

"Well, that explains why you were so cocky on approaching me," he smirked, turning his attention back towards the sock headed Ed. "You're not enough of a man to face me on your own? I suppose 'gentleman' is a word that you have no understanding of." His words, with their attempt to cut at Double D's pride, failed due to his ultimate plan remaining in motion.

"On the contrary, Parker," the smartest Ed said with a smile. "I wish to offer you a challenge. From one gentleman to another, if you will." The Preppie remained silent, but made no other effort to run away. Seeing this as an opening, Double D continued to explain himself.

"My challenge is simple," he explained. "I challenge you to a duel. The weapons...Swords. Well, not exactly real steel, but the combat is similar." He swung his yard stick, letting his intention become fully understood. This prompted Parker's grin to return in full force, while Eddy nearly dropped his stink bomb in shock.

That's it, he thought to himself. His hat's cutting off the blood to his head, makin' him thinks he's freakin' Zorro! Before Eddy could attempt to talk some sense into his friend, the Preppie cut him off.

"Sword fighting?" Parker laughed. "How ridiculous. What makes you think I'd accept such a challenge?"

"I have a few reasons," Double D calmly explained. "For starters, the book you've practically stolen from the library is about swordsmanship. If you have no intention of returning it, then that means you enjoy it so much that you've read it enough to have gained some use in real world applications. Second, I believe that even with that being a potential truth, I'd still be better than you. And third…if you refuse, we'll be sure to never let you live down the fact that you were too cowardly to accept the challenge of a…what did you call me again?" Double D mockingly thought about what Parker called him the day of the egg incident, allowing the Preppie's anger to come to a boil.

"…A worthless cur, was it?" the smartest Ed inquired. This was more than enough to send Parker out of his senses. He reached into his bag and pulled out the book, gesturing to it.

"So be it!" he shouted. "If you win, I'll give you the book, but if I win, you pay me what I owe for the late fees. What do you say?" Eddy heard the caveat of them losing money, and immediately tried to get Double D's attention by waving his hands and shaking his head to tell his friend to say "no".

"Deal," the sock headed teen said. Eddy slapped his forehead and groaned in defeat. As the shortest Ed began to pray for a miracle, Double D politely handed the other yard stick towards Parker, who gruffly took it from his hands.

"We'll make this simple," Double D said. "First person to strike a 'fight ending blow' wins. Head, chest, or disarm. We'll commence on Eddy's count. Best of luck." Parker merely held the yard stick out in front of him and assumed a fencer's stance.

"This will be yet another example of the rich getting richer," he taunted. This prompted Eddy to break out in a cold sweat, nervous at the notion of paying a library debt, no matter how large or small it may be.

"On the count of three," Eddy shouted. The shortest Ed couldn't help but think to himself, Exactly how many pennies will be in my wallet if Sock Head's plan goes down the toilet… as he raised his hand into the air.

"One…" Double D took the yard stick in his hands, assuming a stance that was akin to a samurai's.

"Two…" The Preppie began to shift in his place, anxious to finish his opponent. The smartest Ed, however, seemed oddly calm as he took a deep breath and shut his eyes. Heeding Ed's words from the first time he wielded a weapon in this manner, he began to envision the possible moves Parker would make while simultaneously preparing his counter offensives for each scenario.

"…THREE!"

Double D opened his eyes and saw Parker lunging towards him, his attack aimed directly for the sock headed teen's heart. A gap toothed grin escaped the otherwise calm demeanor of Double D, who merely moved his foot to the side, shifting his body so the yard stick missed its target and left its owner open for any finishing blow that the smartest Ed desired to use. Deciding that this battle was more a show of skill rather than an effort to inflict pain, Double D brought his "sword" down onto the wrist of Parker with a swift chop. The sharp sting prompted the Preppie to drop his weapon, the sound of wood clattering against concrete being the only noise amongst the two dumbfounded teens who witnessed the feat. While Parker began to seethe, Eddy had no intention of suppressing his excited support of his friend winning.

"Ladies and Germs!" he began to shout. "The winner by disarm, the Shogun of Sock Hats, the Cul-de-sac Cutter, DOUBLE D!" While the audience beyond the competitors and himself were imaginary, the smartest Ed felt his pride return in full force as he stepped back, relinquishing his weapon and extending his hand in a gentlemanly nature.

"It would appear that I'm the victor," he said. "Now, if you'll just relinquish the book to our care, we can put this whole ugly business behind us. What do you say?" While Double D's attempt to end the petty feud was genuine, it was now Parker who had gained the sense of humiliation that the sock headed Ed had felt.

"As if!" he shouted. Before Double D could make an attempt to stop him, Parker had rushed for his book bag. He scooped it up and made a dash for the front doors of Harrington House. What he failed to remember was that Double D had not come alone. Eddy, figuring that the Preppie would've tried to cheap out of the bet, positioned himself so that his leg would be able to trip Parker before he could get to safety.

"You ain't thinkin' about leaving yet, are ya?" he asked as he rolled the Preppie over onto his back. The shortest Ed then stood over Parker, letting out a small chuckle as he carefully uncorked the stink bomb. He reeled slightly as the burst of potent fumes wafted towards his nose.

"It really stinks when people lose," he taunted. "Now everyone'll know how bad you lost today." Before Double D could make an attempt to stop Eddy, the de facto leader of the Eds proceeded to pour the El Mondo 2.0's contents all over the head and face of Parker. His futile attempts to block the concoction from hitting him made no difference in the end. As Eddy reached down and dug through the book bag, the sickening sound of Parker gagging and coughing prompted Double D to turn away in disgust. Eddy quickly found a book in the bag that was titled, Cutting Edge: A Synopsis of Swordsmanship.

"I think I found it!" the shortest Ed shouted. He dropped the book bag onto Parker's chest and trotted off towards Double D, who had picked up the other yard stick and was beginning to walk away from the scene.

"That's nice, Eddy," Double D said. "But was it necessary to pour a stink bomb onto Parker's face?"

"He wasn't gonna give us the book anyway, Sock Head," Eddy explained. "This way, he learned a lesson about trying to cheat us out of a bet."

"Still, it seemed rather cruel," the smartest Ed muttered. "Oh, well. The fact that we got the book back and have a week to use it is a rather nice outcome." Eddy gave a slight shrug in response.

"Not sure why you want to use it," he stated. "One move and the fight was over! Oh, man, if only Ed could've seen that match…" The sudden mentioning of their friend caused the boys' eyes to shoot open wide.

"ED!" the simultaneously shouted.

"He's been watching nothing but professional wrestling this whole time!" Double D exclaimed. "Such prolonged exposure…who knows how it'll affect Ed!"

"Come on, Sock Head," Eddy said as he began to run towards the library. "We better make sure the place is still standing." Double D nodded and chased after his friend, the duo staying in a full sprint up to the front doors of the library. They entered the building, their pants echoing in the otherwise silent halls. The librarian looked up from her desk to see the two boys, prompting Eddy to silently hold the book up. The elderly woman gave a small smile, a quick nod, and as if she could read their minds, pointed towards the area where the computer was. Double D and Eddy cautiously made their way towards the computer corner, seeing the outline of their friend sitting in front of the glow of the monitor. He wore headphones, but the audio from the match he was watching was loud enough that they could hear a faint cheer of the crowd in attendance. With the upmost caution, the boys walked up to their friend.

"Ed?" Double D whispered as he tapped him on the shoulder. Ed quickly turned around, his sudden movement prompted his friends to jump back in case his fantasy world was too strong. Fortunately for them, he didn't seem to be hostile in any way. Instead, he gave them a huge smile and a wave.

"Hey, guys!" he cheerfully greeted. He remembered that they were in a library, and managed to keep his volume controlled.

"Hey, Lumpy," Eddy replied. "How was the match?"

"Matches, Eddy," Ed corrected. "I found these videos where they took a whole bunch of matches and put them together on the same screen. Way neat, huh?" Double D took the time to check the monitor, seeing the number of videos Ed had open.

"My word," the smartest Ed said. "Ed, you've managed to watch almost three months' worth of matches in this short time."

"Three months and ten days, Double D," Ed explained. "Now, I've learned a whole bunch of new moves."

"Way to go, Big Ed," Eddy said with a pat on Ed's back. "Guess you've gotten even more ultimate now, huh?"

"Uh-uh, Eddy," the strongest Ed said. "No longer will I be Ultimate Ed." His friends stared at their friend, curious as to where he was trying to go.

"If you won't be Ultimate Ed," Double D began, "then what are you going to be?" Much to their surprise, Ed jumped onto his chair, dropping his headphones and giving a confident smirk.

"I'm Ed 'The Hitman'!" he shouted with a cocky smirk. "I'm the best today, I was the best yesterday, and I'll be the best tomorrow! No one's ever gonna be anything close to The Hitman." This outburst caused the members of the Astronomy Club who had set up their study group at the nearby tables to turn and deliver a collective shush to the Eds. The librarian, sensing trouble, slammed her hands on her desk.

"You three!" she shouted. "Leave at once!" Double D and Eddy looked at their friend, taking note in how guilty he appeared.

"Oops…" Ed muttered as his friends began to lead him out of the building.

"No worries, 'Hitman'," Eddy said, giving a slight chuckle at the new persona. "Now, lemme tell ya a story about the Sock Headed Samurai…" Ed's eyes began to widen at the thought of a samurai story, while Double D merely rolled his eyes and chuckled. The trio then made their way back to the dorm, each one satisfied with how their day went.

There you have it. People are learning new things left and right...OK, so Eddy didn't learn anything new, but the year's still young. Anything's possible. So, what did you like/not like the most about this chapter. Let me know in a review. Also, next chapter should be an original too. Maybe it'll come out soon...Ah, well.

Peace.