DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN GRAVITY FALLS

Recap from Pacifica's Revenge: Dipper and Mabel Pines spent their summer vacation with there Grunkle Stan in a place called Gravity Falls. While there Dipper got into a relationship with local rich girl and queen bee Pacifica Northwest, much to his sister's dismay. Before leaving Pacifica instructed Dipper to date other girls in order to make himself more up to her standards in terms of boyfriends.

Dipper's Quest

"Ah the first day of school," Dipper declared sounding excited. "A new school year with a fresh new start, and a chance to meet girls!"

"So you're really going through with this?" Mabel asked disapprovingly.

"Yeah Mabel, besides I'm only going out on a couple of dates not asking them for marriage," Dipper said casually.

"To some girls that's the same thing," Mabel said sadly.

"Look Mabel, I promise I won't string them along. I'll make sure that they understand that I'm not looking for a serious relationship," Dipper promised.

"I still think this is a bad idea," Mabel sulked.

"Don't worry Mabel I have a plan," Dipper declared.

"Oh no not another list thing!" Mabel groaned.

"No, no," Dipper laughed. "I've learned my lesson. Lists don't work. I'm just going to go up and talk to them." Dipper went off to 'hit' on the first girl he came across only to be 'hit' across the face!

"Maybe you should make a list, brother." Mabel advised shaking her head after seeing him fail so miserably.

One Week Later

Dipper's log:

At Mabel's suggestion I began compiling a list of things that attract girls. From careful observations I've noted looks, athletic ability, reputation, wealth, talent, sense of humor/sympathy, and intelligence seems to be the prime qualities that girls desire. You'd think intelligence would be much higher on the list, but then again these are girls we are talking about. I am quite certain with my good looks and witty humor it is possible for me to date at least one of the 'A' listers.

Dipper slowly made his way to what he figured to be the popular kids in school. "Hey ladies," was as far as Dipper got before their boyfriends showed up to make an 'example' of him. "Mental note, make sure the girls boyfriends are not around before hitting on them!" Dipper told himself before plopping in the garbage can.

One Month Later

Dipper's log:

After more careful observations, I noticed that several girls tend to worship movie stars and musicians. Perhaps if I try to emulate them I might be more successful.

Dipper, much to his discomfort, went off to watch the latest chick flick and listen to the most popular current boy bands. Most of the stuff he watched almost made him puke! After making a list of the 'pretty boys' catch phrases and main chorus lines from the songs; Dipper proceeded to test his new image on some girls he saw were drooling over the latest teen magazine. "Hello ladies," Dipper greeted wearing almost the same style of clothing as the boys in the magazine. "Um, when I woke up this morning I heard bells, and that means a special girl got her wings!" The girls stared at him for a second before bursting into laughter. Seeing that his ploy failed, Dipper graciously walked away but not discourage. As he attempted more corny lines on other girls.

Few More Months Later

Dipper's Log:

So far my attempts to date have ended in failure. And it seems that I have developed somewhat of a bad rep in the school. So now the popular kids are now avoiding me. Whatev, I've long stopped caring what other people thought of me. That being said; for now it is probably best if I started lower on the social totem pole and focus on regular girls rather than the popular ones.

Dipper made his way to the school library where he spotted a group of girls in what looked like a study group. "Hello ladies," Dipper greeted. "You need any help with that?" The girls quickly went into a huddle. While they tried to whisper as quietly as possible; Dipper could still hear that they were concern about his motives, but at the same time they know that he is pretty smart.

"If it's not too much trouble, maybe you can help us study for the math test?" one of the girls asked. Dipper smiled as he proceeded to tutor them. The lessons took a little long than he expected but after using some clever references from some of the monster romance movies he forced himself to see, they finally manage to get it. "Wow, I never realized that it was so easy," one of the girls said.

"Yes, is there anyway we can thank you?" another asked.

"As a matter of fact," Dipper said in his suave voice. "Are you girls busy this weekend?"

"What are you that desperate for a girlfriend that you finally turned to us?" one of the girls mocked.

"Oh no I already have a girlfriend. I'm just want to practice dating other girls so I know how to treat her better." Dipper admitted. *SLAP* the girls all smacked him after hearing that. "I'll be here tomorrow if you need more tutoring!" Dipper said as the girls left in a huff. Surprisingly most did come back after passing their test and seeing he is a good tutor, but still no one wanted to date him.

A Few Weeks Later

Dipper sat alone in the lunch room. Thanks to his new reputation most students don't want to be seen near him. Except for Mabel but she's busy in detention for disrupting class. Apparently because some boy was hitting on her. Although Dipper was pretty sure it was the other way around. Needless to say he was having a very lonely lunch when...

"Excuse me, but is this seat taken?" this strange but familiar boy asked.

"Help yourself, but don't blame me if my unpopularity rubs off on you," Dipper warned.

"Yes, I've heard. I'm Eric Smith." the boy introduced himself.

"Dipper Pines," Dipper said in turn shaking his hand. Now Dipper remembers seeing him in some of his classes. "So what brings you here?" he asked suspiciously.

"Curiosity mainly," Eric answered. "I'm sure you heard about your sister?"

"What has she done now?" Dipper asked fearfully.

"Well she caused a bit of a rucks in history class," Eric explained. "We were studying about monopolies and corporate corruption and she went off on how everyone with money is evil and a blight on society. Like her Gunkle and this evil witch that bought her brother's heart. What's all that about."

"I see," Dipper chuckled as he proceeded to tell Eric about their little adventure in Gravity Falls. Minus all the weirdness of course.

"Wow, that's quite a tale," Eric said completely impressed. "This Pacifica must be a real special girl then."

"Nope, she's actually a spoiled brat, who uses her money and influence to treat everyone else like dirt." Dipper laughed.

"So that's why she has a problem with rich people," Eric whispered to himself. "Wait if she's so horrible, why are you with her?" he asked.

"That's the problem with love," Dipper said softly. "Sometimes you never have a choice when cupid's arrow hits."

"Yes," Eric agreed since he's going through the same deal. "Well I like to say this has been fun, but it hasn't." Eric said getting up. "Oh and one piece of advise. Instead of just randomly hitting on girls, try being their friend first. That way there's no misunderstandings in your intentions."

"Nice guy," Dipper commented after Eric left. Hoping that he might have actually made a friend near his age. "Still I wonder what's all that about?"

Start of the Next Semester

Dipper laid off the hitting on girls plan and decided to go with Eric's suggestion and befriending them first. Helping tutoring the girls and joining things like the book club. While participating in these activities helped to repair his rep, it did little to help him get closer to girls. They all still refuse to date him. Then one day he heard a lonely voice under a tree.

"I wonder if there really are such things as mermaids?" a strange girl with a monster book said.

"Oh there real," Dipper answered. "They live in the water and have like 14 hearts."

"You know it's not polite to just jump into a private conversation like that!" the girl scolded him.

"Your right and I'm sorry," Dipper apologized looking around. "But don't you need another person to have a conversation? Private or otherwise?"

"Not if you're having a conversation with yourself," the girl answered.

"Ah I see," Dipper chuckled. 'Man this girl is almost as nutty a Mabel,' Dipper thought to himself. "Mind if I join in?"

"Knock yourself out," the girl invited.

"Thanks, my name's Dipper by the way. Dipper Pines."

"Oh you're that loser player that's been hitting on every girl! I was wondering when you would get to me." the girl teased. "The name's Rachel."

"Nice to meet you Rachel, so what are you reading?" Dipper asked. Rachel showed him a book on mythological monsters. "Cool, you know I've had some experience with monsters."

"Oh really like what?" Rachel asked skeptically. Dipper began telling her about some of the creatures he encountered at Gravity Falls. Not too surprising Rachel didn't believe a word of it. "You expect me to believe that garbage! I mean seriously, Minotaurs are a bunch of testosterone crazed bone heads who love to beat each other senseless, the Trickster is living loser candy that just wants to be eaten! You're going to have to do better than that if you want me to believe your ridiculous tall tales!"

"You're free to believe what you want. I'm just telling you what I saw and experience." Dipper said confidently.

Rachel stared at him curiously. She has met a lot of people claiming to have seen big foot and what not. Every time she could tell that they were lying, but there's something about Dipper that makes her believe that he's telling the truth. "So you encountered all these creatures in...what was that place again?"

"Gravity Falls, Oregon!" Dipper said proudly. "Just east of eerie, south of strange, west of weird, and north of normal."

"Wow, did you spend all summer coming up with that one," Rachel giggled.

"Actually It's my Gunkle's slogan," Dipper handing her a pamphlet for the Mystery Shack. That he kept in his vest pocket but never removed for some reason.

Rachel looked at the pamphlet and quickly realized that it was just one of those cheap roadside attractions scams. "I knew it! I knew you were just pulling my leg!"

"Maybe," Dipper teased. "But you know what they say. Sometimes the best place to hide a needle is not in a haystack, but with other needles."

"So the best place to hide a monster is a place that displays monsters." Rachel smiled as she looked over the pamphlet. "Mystery Shack huh. Maybe I will pay it a visit. Can you tell me more?" Dipper smiled more than happy to oblige!

A/N: Hope you enjoyed this little side story of my other Gravity Falls fic 'Pacifica's Revenge'.

I would like to thank Alisi Thorndyke for allowing me to use her OC, Eric Smith from her stories 'Child of Destiny' and 'Prophecy's Light'. Please check them out if you hadn't. Yes, I did ask permission to use this character. While I am using this character for my story, I wish to make clear that this story in no way is connected to or related to CoD or PL in any way!