Hello! This is my very first song fic, so I hope you like it. Puzzleshipping is my #1 ship ever, and I got the inspiration for this from a YouTube video. This is very depressing, and I cried writing it. So, happy reading! *hands tissue* you might need this. Oh, and as your reading this I highly recommend listening to the song on repeat, it kind of sets the mood.

Warning: very sad and angusty.

Disclaimer: I only own the plot for this story, nothing else. I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh!, the lyrics to Tightrope or Ron Pope for that matter. And I'm to depressed to put a funny quote in the disclaimer this time.

Flashback

'thinking'

"talking"

Lyrics

~Tightrope~

I woke up before the sun chased your ghost across the yard.

I raise up out of my cold and empty bed. Its still hard to believe that this was the bed we used to share, we used to snuggle and make love on this very same mattress. Every night and day on this bed reminds me of you, it still has your sent. Every night and day I'm struck with the horrible memory of that day, how I messed up. I shake the image from my head and whipe a tear from my face. I look at the clock next to my bed and see the time. 3:39 flashes in red numbers. I look to the window across the room, the sun isn't up yet. It's still tucked under the security of the earth, not even taking notice of everything around it, probably like you are right now.

Through the fog and tumblimg dark 'till you were gone

I swing my legs over the bed, haunted by the memory of you. I can't move on, I can't. You just seemed to disappear that day, into a dark and blurred place. Deep down somewhere I know its was really me, I'm covered in darkness and angust, you had moved on and seemed to forget about me. I take a deep breath, god I'm so stupid.

Virginia, I can hardly breathe

My throught seems to close up, and tears begin to form in my eyes again. Oh, Yugi if I could go back and redo all I did and take back all I said, I would! The memory of you is to much to handle, and I begin to cry once more. I try to take deep breaths to steady myself, but it doesn't work, it never does, and I am powerless against this feeling and against my emotions.

I've forgotten how to sleep

I have had another sleepless night thinking of you. How many nights have I spent like this? I forget, and lost track after the first week. Sleep isn't something I really need anymore, my body is used to the lack of it I guess. All of my nights are depressing and uneasy, and this lack of sleep has an effect on me. I imagine things, most of all, you. Yugi, I see you everywhere, and I cry everytime I do, it is just so depressing. It reminds me of everything, the goodtimes, the love making, the fight.

And your face still haunts my dreams when I'm alone

Everytime I close my eyes, you are there Aibou! I can't get over you, you were my everything, and still are! I bury my face in my hands and my sobbs get louder, I begin to shake. I can't stop thinking of you. You are the reason I can't sleep, you are the reason I'm so misrable. Everytime I try to sleep you are there! Your perfect, big, innocent, lavender eyes, your beautiful, soft lips and your smile! I see the way you used to look at me, with love and compassion and understanding! You were the only one who understood me, you were the only one looked at me in such a way! I force my eyes open, and don't blink until my eyes sting, and I have to. Because everytime I see you, it gets worse, and I can't stand it!

So now I'm walking on a tightrope wire too far off the ground

It feels like I'm on a tightrope wire, one wrong step and I will slip off into madness and insanity. I'm wondering why I haven't done it yet, I'm so close, and I dont want to fall. If I fall, then who knows what will happen? If I see you one more time I'm going to take a wrong step, I know I am. I feel alone and horrifying, like no one cares. They probably don't, do you? If I fall, it will be the end of me, I know it! I can't see you again. I just can't!

I'm imagining the words you said when last I saw your mouth

I blink again and the memory flies back to me and hits me hard like the slap you gave me that day.

"Yami! I don't get it! I loved you, I loved you with everything in me! How could you betray me? What did I do to you, am I not good enough?!"

I shake my head and start to rock back and fourth. "Oh, Yugi, its not you... Its all me." I cradle myself back and fourth in an attempt to compfort myself. It doesn't work, and it seems nothing I ever do works anymore. I look up at the ceiling, and what I see hurts. There is a mirror on the ceiling, it was there when we moved in, remember? I look like crap.

Yes, I'm walking on a tightrope wire, so afraid to fall

I can't fall, I can't let myself deeper into depression. The only stage left is suicide, falling is not an option really. I could do it, there is a gun under the pillow in case of emergency. At that I glance at the pillow and reach out to it, I press hard and feel it under there. It would be painless and fast afterall, I wouldn't be in pain anymore. I reach under the pillow and feel the cool silver, I shiver and pull my hand away. I'm shaking, what was I just thinking? What's wrong with me? I'm going crazy!

And I'd tell you that I miss you but I'm sure... It doesn't matter at all

If I tell you what is going on, and that I'm thinking, you probably wouldn't care. Afterall, I did so much crap to you, I guess I deserved to be shit on for once. I wish to take it all back, I love you so much. That doesn't matter though, because you don't care, I know you don't. If you did, you would've called, you would've talked to me.

"Well if you were a better husband I wouldn't have to stoop so low! You don't really care about me! It's all about you isn't it?! If you paid more attention to me I wouldn't have to go seeking it from others!"

I was wrong, Aibou. It was me, all me! You were a perfect husband, you were the most magnificent person in all of Domino. I know you used to care about me, but now, I'm not so sure. You probably go days without giving me a single thought, huh? I don't blame you if thats the case, I understand.

The things I gave away they're not coming back for me

I threw away all of your love, and I gave mine to someone else. You didn't deserve it, I know you didn't, you know you didn't. No wonder you left me, you weren't the horrible one, I was. I was the one that betrayed you, you were the perfect, loyal, wonderful one, and I was a sick, imperfect, mess of a husband and we both know it. I practically threw you away, out on the street with no one to protect or watch after you, and now you are the one on your feet, when I'm in the dumps. I can't live without you, not much longer anyway, but you seem to be doing wonderful. Huh... Its funny how karma works isn't it Aibou?

Should've learned from my mistakes, but I never do

Its hard to believe it, but it has happened before. I shake my head, 'Your so fucking stupid Yami!' you had given me another chance the first time it happened. You did it because you trusted me and loved me, and I promised you that you would be the only object of my affection... Look at how trustworthy I am now... I cheated on you, the only person that ever understood and loved me, twice. You were loyal and patient with me, but I was just a jackass!

"I was good to you! What are you talking about?! This has happened twice, Yami! How could you do such a horrible thing to me twice and expect me to just go on loving and trusting you like before?!"

As I lay here all alone I hang up before I call

I hold my phone in my hand, looking down at your number on the screen. I take a deep breath and lay back on the bed. Maybe I should call you... We haven't talked in about 3 weeks... What could've happened between then and now? I sigh, if you really wanted to talk you would've called me by now. I know you, or at least I think I do. I turn the screen on my phone off and throw it across the room, a big thump echoes out. It probably just came in contact with the floor is all, I don't care if I damaged it, no one calls me these days anyway. I can't look at your name anymore, it hurts, when we married you changed your last name to Sennen, but since you wanted a divorce, it became Moto again. We aren't officially divorced yet, but its in the works, seeing your last name Moto hurts me more then you might think. I had gotten so used to Yugi Sennen I kinda forgotten about your real name, in my opinion Sennen sounds much better then Moto. The thing is though, I don't want you to have my name. You don't deserve the name of a cheating bastard, you deserve much better.

And admit to all my faults to pass the time

I'm such an idiot, what's wrong with me? I hurt you, when you were always so sweet and loving to me. I was so sick, and thinking about what I had done made me want to throw up! I begin to cry again, I was so horrifying! I had gone to her house and fucked the living hell out of her when I told you I was working, and then I came right home and fucked you like you were the only one in my life... I should've known that she couldn't compare to you, she couldn't hold a mere candle to your perfect body and perfect being. The worst thing is, when you found out what I was doing, everything you were saying was right, you were dead on on everything, I was just too drowned in pride to admit it. Why I was proud, I don't know, you didn't deserve what I did to you, if you deserve anything its a person who will treat you well, not me... I'm not good enough for you, I'm under your level, and we both know it, Yugi.

"I don't really care if you want to love me again! I don't need or want any of your love! I'm fine without you, so you can just leave! I can take care of myself, I don't need someone to babysit me, especially you, Yugi!"

So now I'm walking on a tightrope wire too far off the ground

Truth is, I can't really take care of myself. I do need you to take care of me, I need you to love me, I always did and always will. You were the only one I really love, and if I could go back and undo what I did and said to you, I would. I had ruined our relationship, I don't know why, I was just a sick bastard. I loved our love and our relationship before I had done all that messed up shit, and I want it like that again. I know though, that if we ever were to get back together, we would never have that same trust ever again. It's all my fault too.

I'm imagining the words you said when last I saw your mouth

My head begins to pound with a headache as I think about the ending of our argument. I didn't know it at the time, I was so furious and was so blind, but its the worst memory I have. I still can't belive it happened.

"So, are you saying you want me to leave, Yami? That you don't want to be my husband anymore?"

"Yes."

My wet eyes begin to burn and sting, this is the most painful memory I have. My Aibou leaving me...

"Fine. I'll go, I'm sorry for the inconvenience."

Yes, I'm walking on a tightrope wire so afraid to fall

There were tears in your eyes, you think I didn't see them, but I did. I caused you so much pain, and I caused myself pain as well. I shake my head and jump of the bed. I pase back and fourth with my head in my hands and curse myself. "YAMI YOUR SUCH A FUCKING RETARDED BITCH!" I yell. Tears stream down my eyes like rivers and my head is pounding with guilt and regret. I sit back on the bed, this time on my knees. I wrap my arms around my self and I rock back and fourth, I look up at the mirror on the ceiling and at myself.

"Why did you do that Yami?" I ask myself quietly. "...Why?"

And I'd tell you that I miss you but I'm sure it doesn't matter at all

I should've told you I was sorry, I was, I am. I love you, so much. I was cruel and horrendous, I look down at the bed again, I can't stand the sight of me anymore, it makes me sick to my stomach. I'm sure you have moved on by now, you haven't called or got in touch with me since the incident. I don't blame you, Yugi. If it were me I'd do the same, but it would never be me, you are too loyal and perfect to do such a thing. My chest is starting to hurt, and to be honest I don't think I can take it much longer, I'm going to go insane.

There's a place we used to go, today I went alone

Do you remember? We used to go to that one park bench every Sunday, we would just sit there and talk. I love that spot, we had the best times there. We had our first date in that park, and that's were we sat together, I proposed to you on that bench. I went there the otherday, I don't know why, it just felt right. I sat there and cried, I miss you so much... I can't take it anymore.

If there's a message in this song, well I don't know

I don't know what to do Aibou, I want to take it all back! I can't though, I would just be wasting my breath, you probably don't want to hear my pathetic apologies. The ringing of the phone cuts off my thoughts, and makes me jump. It's the home phone on the side table next to my bed, I look at it, but don't make any attempt to answer it. It's probably Joey, he has been calling me a lot lately. Basically to compfort me and see if I'm ok, he feels bad for me I guess. Well I don't need his pity, I deserve what I'm feeling, I know I do. I let the phone ring out, I don't want pity this morning. As the phone beeps, and a message is left on it, I almost can't believe my ears. I look at the phone with wide eyes.

So now I'm walking on a tightrope wire too far off the ground

"... Um... Hey Yami... I-it's me, Yugi." your voice comes through, and I jump up off the bed and run to the phone to listen more closely. "We need to talk..., it's not about the divorce or anything..." You take a deep breath, like you are preparing yourself to say something. "... I want to see you again... Yami I need to hear your voice again... I miss you."

I can't take it anymore and I pick up the phone. "Yugi?"

I'm imagining the words you said when last I saw your mouth

You pause, as if not expecting me to answer. "Y-Yami? Is that you?"

"Yes, Yugi... It's me." I say. It's really good to hear your voice again, I missed it. I can't believe you actually called me, I was such a bitch to you, and you are still so sweet to me.

You chuckle. "It's good to hear your voice again..." you sigh. "... So, how have you been?"

Yes I'm walking on a tightrope wire

I take a deep breath. "Do you really want to know?" I ask. It takes you a second to answer, but when you do, your voice is sweet and soft like honey.

"... Yes, I do. I care about you, Yami." my heart skips a beat at your words, is there a possibility you still love me? How could you? I treated you like garbage, why would you still have feelings for me?

I sigh, deciding to let it out. "I've been feeling horrible..." I pause. "... Yugi... I ... I'm sorry..."

So afraid to fall

"What? Y-you are?" you ask, clearly confused. I don't blame you, I would've felt the same way. I mean, I threw you out like a heartless beast. I cheated on you and acted like I neved cared, then I say I'm sorry? What the hell is wrong with me?

"Yes... You didn't deserve that... You didn't deserve to be treated that way. I'm sorry." when you don't answer, I continue. "Yugi... I didn't mean it. I didn't mean what I said that day..."

You take a breath, I can hear the quiver in your voice when you speak. "Yami... Do you expect me to forgive you? I can't, not after what happened! I can't trust yo-"

"I didn't ask for your forgiveness!" I cut you off. I begin to shake, just talking to you makes me want to cry. "I know you can't trust me. I know why too. I don't blame you, I would feel the same Yugi..." I take another breath, I can barly talk. "... I don't deserve your trust or your forgiveness... I know that. I don't deserve you, or what you always gave me."

And I'd tell you that I miss you but I'm sure

"..." you hesitate before talking. "What did I always give you?" you ask. You sound like you are on the verge of tears, like its to much for you.

"... Happiness, comfort," without really thinking about it I pull the gun out from under the pillow and sit on the bed. I turn it in my hand while I talk. "Love."

You take a quivering breath. "Yami... I... " you don't finish, and I can hear sobs come from the other side of the phone.

I lay back on the bed and lay the gut on my chest. "Don't cry, Yugi." I say softly. You stop almost immediately. "That's better." I sigh, I hate to hear or see you cry. It breaks my heart.

Yes, I'm walking on a tightrope wire too far off the ground

You don't talk, all that comes through the other line is a set of sniffles and quivering breath. I continue to talk.

"Yugi, I need to tell you something... Something you really need to know." I breathe. I pull a box of ammunition out of the drawer next to the bed. I pull out one bullet, because one bullet is all I need.

"Y-yeah?" you studder.

I take a deep breath and hold the gold bullet up for inspection. It looks ok, highly deadly... I will die with one shot to the head, that I'm sure of.

I'm imagining the words you said when last I saw your mouth

"Yugi... Aibou... I love you. I always have and always will. What I did to you... It was a poor attempt for attention. At the time I didn't know it, but now I do." you don't answer. All I can hear from the other line is your breathing. "Yugi I'm so sorry! You didn't deserve what I did... You have never deserved it."

"... But I thought you said that I was a horrible husband... And that I was useless." your voice is cracking, and I can tell your close to tears.

I slip the bullet in the gun, but dont cock it yet.

Yes, I'm walking on a tightrope wire so afraid to fall

"No! I was the horrible one, I was the useless one. You were and still are perfect, Aibou! No one can compare to you, and I can't belive it has tooken me this long to figure it out. I was a blind fool, and I wish with everything in me to take it all back." I say, I'm crying now, and I know you are too.

"Yami! I... Your not horrible! You were a good man and I was the stu-"

"Yugi! Shut up! Right now!" I yell and cut you off. "Don't let the words I once said to you in my anger and selfishness corrupt your innocent mind! You are perfect! You were loyal and right and fair to me! I was the one who failed to give that back to you! Not the other way around!"

And I'd tell you that I miss you but I'm sure

I sigh and cock the gun. It's heard through the line, and I hear panic in your voice. "Yami!? Yami what was that!?"

I take a deep breath and avoid your question. "Aibou, I love you. I love you so much. I hope you can find it in your heart one day to forgive me, because I can't live wihout you anymore." tears stream down my face and I hold my shaking hand and gun up to the side of my head.

And I'd tell you that I miss you but I'm sure

"YAMI! YAMI PLEASE NO!" You scream. You are crying heavily, and I hear running in the background.

Silly Aibou, you won't reach me in time.

It doesn't matter at all

"Yugi... I love you. So much! Good bye."

"NO! YAMI YOU CAN'T! PLEASE! I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU YAMI I NEED YOU! PLEASE NO!"

I close my eyes and smile as I see you in my mind. You are smiling at me again, with love and compation, and its the first time in forever I'm happy to see you. You are my last thought as I pull the trigger. You are the last thing that goes through my mind, your loving smile and eyes.

It doesn't matter at all

At least I managed to succeed in something this time, I finally fell.

~End~

So, what did you think? I spent a lot of time on this, and spent about 5 hours total listening to this song on repeat. I do realize I might get some mad people and bad feedback on this, mainly because YamI is so OOC. We all know that the Yami we know and love would never do such a thing as suicide. But its a stroy, and its not real. I hope you enjoyed this, I had a sad and fun time writing it. I think I'm good at depressing stories, what about you? Anyway, to anyone who is reading this and is reading either of my stories, this is were I have been. I couldn't get this out of my head, and music is such a motivation for me. It helps me think. Please review and tell me what you think!