Chapter 12

'journey within'

"Syaoran. Hey, Syaoran, wake up!" Impatiently she snapped her fingers in front of his face, and at last he blinked.

"Huh, what?" He stirred slightly as his vision came into focus. There was a girl kneeling in front of him, looking a little cross. "M – Meilin?"

She smiled and nodded.

"You're alive? But - "

"Baka. I've been dead for over a cycle. You know that." Syaoran was confused. She looked real enough, scowling in that cute way she always did, her dark eyes fierce and competitive. "You can see me because you're in a trance."

"I am?"

"Oh yes. A really strong one, I might add."

"Oh." Uncertainly, he looked around. The top of the tower was now lonely and quiet, with just the two of them sitting there, and no sound but the night breeze blowing softly. He felt it lift the damp and sticky bangs off his forehead, and realized that he was covered in sweat. Had he been fighting? "Why am I in a trance?"

"Because Lothar put you in one. He wanted you out of the way."

"Oh yeah." Now he could remember. Invading the castle with Kinomoto, fighting the soldiers, and then finding Lothar and Sakura on top of the tower. At long last he'd finally found his family's killer, and he hadn't been able to take more than a couple steps before being defeated. His shoulders slumped. "I couldn't even get close. He put me in a trance without even trying. I lost."

Meilin made an exasperated noise in the back of her throat.

"Well, what did you expect, Syaoran? That he would just stand there and let you cut him down? He's been ruler for dozens of cycles for a reason, you know. He's the most powerful sorcerer in the land!"

Syaoran cringed, feeling abashed. Of course, he knew it wasn't going to be that easy. But still, he'd thought he would get a little further than that!

"I failed us, Meilin. I'm the last of the Lis and I couldn't even get close. So much for my vow of revenge."

A sharp cuff across the side of his head startled him out of his misery.

"Ouch!" He rubbed his ear and glared at her. "You hit me!"

"You deserved it. You're just sitting there, feeling sorry for yourself. Pathetic. And right in the middle of a battle, too! You have no focus, Syaoran, no concentration whatsoever. No wonder he was able to put you in a trance so easily."

She was taking on that bossy, self-righteous tone that she always got when she bested him in the sparring ring.

"You didn't have to hit me."

"Well I don't know what else is going to work. You've got to snap out of this trance somehow. Sakura needs you."

"She does?" Syaoran felt a flicker of worry, then shook his head. "What can I do? I can't even get close to Lothar; he can crush me easily. I don't stand a chance."

He supposed he really should have been expecting it, but he felt surprised nonetheless at the second blow.

"Ouch!"

"Would you stop it already, baka? This is Sakura we're talking about! She's going to die. Do you understand me, Syaoran?" She leaned closer and locked gazes with him. "Lothar's going to suck the magic from the Seal right out of her body and there will be nothing left. No way for her to wake up. Her mind will be lost forever in a dark void. Do you want that to happen?"

"Well, no, but - "

"Then what are you just sitting around for, damn it? I thought you said you loved her. I thought you said that you would do anything for her, even die. Have you forgotten about last night already?"
"No! But…" He looked around helplessly at the empty rooftop. "He's so strong. I don't know how to break out of this trance. And what's to stop him from just putting me in another one if I do?"

She clucked her tongue in disappointment.

"Is this really my fiancé talking? The boy who fought me everyday and refused to admit defeat, even though it was obvious I was better?"

Syaoran bristled at that.

"You were not - "

"Shut up. Wei would say you lack focus, and you know it. To put it bluntly, Syaoran, this…" She paused and pulled up his left sleeve to reveal the family crest. "This isn't enough motivation. You want revenge; that's fine. You want restitution; that's fine too. But that isn't going to break you out of this trance. You have to focus on what you want. What you love."

She was staring directly into his eyes now, and her piercing gaze held him transfixed. He knew what she was talking about, all right. He loved Sakura. He had to fight to save her, even if it was hopeless.

Meilin knew that her words had hit home at last and dropped her eyes, adopting a softer tone.

"She's pretty."

Syaoran swallowed at that. What was he supposed to say? What could he say, to the woman that he had been intended to marry?

"Don't worry about me," she said in answer to his thoughts. "You don't have the luxury of worrying about me. I know you love her like you never loved me, and I'm happy for you, Syaoran. I really am. She's right for you."

She looked so beautiful right then, with her long black hair rippling in the breeze. Upon looking closer, he could see that starlight itself was caught in her tresses. She really had come down from the heavens.

"Thank you, Meilin. For coming to talk to me. I needed it."

"I know."

"But I was the better fighter."

She gasped and moved to strike him again, but this time he reacted quickly enough and snatched her wrist with his left hand, stopping her just short of making contact.

"I do love you, you know. And I miss you."

"I know." She looked a little teary for a moment, then flashed that grin of hers. "She's not like me, though, is she?"

Syaoran mirrored her grin, feeling his muscles relax. His body was already preparing to go into battle again.

"No one could ever be like you." He pulled her wrist to the floor, drawing her close enough until he could plant his mouth lightly on hers. He felt her cool touch on his lips, and then the feeling of her faded away.

"Sakura!"

His eyes refocused, and he shook his head a little to clear it.

"Sakura, wake up!"

And then, abruptly, Li was back in reality. The scene in front of him was absolute chaos. Nietzsche was locked in a magical duel with two luminescent beings, all of them throwing off sparks as they attacked and counterattacked. And, quite clearly in the moonlight, he could see Kinomoto backed up against the edge of the tower, embracing Sakura in his lap and pleading with her to wake up. He was looking up helplessly as Lothar raised his staff to strike.

There was nowhere left to crawl, no way to escape. Touya trembled as he hugged Sakura close, knowing that this was the end. This time there was nowhere left to go.

Lothar smiled cruelly and prepared to stab, but his staff was unexpectedly shoved down into the floor.

"You will not touch her," Li said coldly. His sword was biting deep into the wood, trapping it against the marble surface. Lothar's sunken eyes flashed with surprise, and then rage.

"You dare…" he breathed.

"That's right." The impudent son of Li lifted his chin and gave his ruler a challenging look. There was a moment's silence, and then Lothar uttered a roar of anger, pushing the young warrior away from himself with the sheer force of magic. No one, no one, had ever dared to physically strike at the old sorcerer. Lothar's fury knew no bounds. He would mangle the boy before he was through. He would rip him apart.

Yue watched the rebel face off against Lothar, allowing himself a small smile. At last, the Li boy had awakened, and the Moon Guardian was sure he would keep the sorcerer at bay. Sakura was safe, momentarily. But she was unconscious still, with no way to direct and control the magic she now possessed.

Gritting his teeth with the effort of maintaining his shield against Nietzsche's attacks, his silver eyes flickered back to the young captain trying to wake her.

Not that way, he said silently, directing his thoughts to the human. He wasn't quite sure why he expected the man to hear, but sure enough, he looked up in surprise.

Not that way. You must go into the darkness and find her. You have to bring her back.

Go into the darkness? Touya shook his head slightly, confused, and the man with wings gave him an impatient look.

Reach her as you have before. Go now!

Touya jumped at the sharp command, then returned his attention to Sakura. Reach her as he had before? What did that mean?

Frustrated and scared, he tried to concentrate, to understand. The first connection he'd ever felt with Sakura was when she was in his tent. He remembered how they had been so close to kissing, noses touching, when that feeling jolted him. She'd felt it too.

"Sakura," he whispered, so close that his lips brushed over her skin. He could feel the light exhalation of breath. She was alive, but barely. "Sakura, can you hear me? It's Touya. You have to come back. We need you."

Tenderly he traced his lips over her skin until he found her mouth. Gently, very gently, he pressed his lips to hers.

Sakura…

Li, fortunately, had no time to watch what Touya was doing. All his concentration was directed toward his opponent. He would not let it waver; he would not disappoint Meilin.

"Insect," Lothar spat, and his eyes shot twin beams of energy toward Li. But the young fighter caught them on his sword and reflected them back at his attacker. He was rewarded with a grunt of pain, but Lothar did not buckle. "I will crush you!"

"Take your best shot," Li replied. "I'll fight it. My family bears the strongest warriors in the land."

"You are nothing. You cannot compare to my powers! Your father knew this." Lothar bared his sharp teeth and opened his palm again, directing a wave of magic towards Li's mind. Stubbornly Li repelled the onslaught, fighting to hang onto his consciousness. Save Sakura. Must save Sakura. He couldn't think of anything else.

The attack dissipated, and Li shot Lothar a prideful look.

"My father was not weak. He made the wrong decision, one that I am correcting. But he was not weak."

"He feared me!"

"He understood your power." Lothar jammed his staff against the floor and Li muttered a quick spell, dousing the flames with water before they could even begin. "But he only feared for his family. It was you that feared him!"

Lothar opened up his palm and a scarlet ball of energy began to form. Li took a step back, preparing, listening carefully to his instincts. When the attack released, he was ready, and deflected it with its sword.

"He was your servant, but you were threatened by his powers. You killed my family because we were a danger to you. We were too powerful for your liking – you were scared!"

"Enough!"

Lothar gestured sharply with his thin bony hand. Li had no time to prepare, and was swept off his feet by the sudden blow. He hit the ground hard, not far from the edge, and picked himself up, groaning.

"Give it up now, son of Li. You cannot hope to win."

"I don't care. I won't let you take her."

- - - - - - -

"Sakura?"

Touya turned a slow circle, searching fruitlessly. There was nothing, nothing at all. Only the complete and unyielding darkness. There was nothing but black.

This must have been what Yue was talking about. She brought me here with the kiss; now I have to find her. But where is she?

"Where are you?" he called out, not really expecting a reply. He was startled by something soft brushing against his face, and jerked back with his fists raised. But there was nothing at all to see.

"Sakura, is that you? Where are you?"

It floated past his face again, and this time he reached out and snatched it from the dark. Opening his fist, he could see what looked the petals of some flower in his palm. Tiny, pink, and delicate, he was sure he'd never seen a flower with petals like this. The flowers of the badlands all grew vibrant, colorful petals. What kind of plant was it?

They scattered again, caught in the grip of some breeze that he couldn't feel.

"Hey – wait! Wait!" He didn't know what they were, but at least they were better than the oppressive blackness. Touya hurried to keep up as they twisted and danced in the air. They were leading him.

"Sakura, please. Where are you?"

The petals paused in their dancing and began to float around him.

I don't know.

He heard the voice in his head, but he had the uncanny feeling that it was the flowers that were talking. There were a lot more of them now, swirling around him like dust in a desert sandstorm.

"This isn't a time for games, Sakura. We need you back there." He gestured helplessly, not really sure where 'there' was at this point. "Where are you?"

I don't know. How can I know where I am, if I don't know who I am?

"You know who you are. You're Sakura."

Am I?

The voice sounded puzzled, as if she wasn't really sure. At least she was communicating with him, and he hurried to keep the conversation going.

"Yes! Yes, you are. We've met a few times before. I'm Touya. Do you remember me?"

Do you remember me?

The thoughtful inquiry gave him pause.

"I – I don't know. Sometimes I think I do. I've seen your face in my dreams. I think we knew each other in our past."

She didn't reply immediately, and he held his breath. The flower petals weren't moving so fast now, floating more slowly.

I don't know who I am. Nobody knows who I am. I am lost in the oblivion; nobody cares.

"That's not true! I care! I came here to find you. I want to bring you back."

How can you do this, when you don't know who I am?

"Well, I guess I'll just have to figure it out." Touya took a deep breath. "We knew each other once. I'm sure of it. Somewhere inside of me, I know exactly who you are and where you came from. Will you help me discover the answer?"

She said nothing, but the petals seemed excited. They began to fly faster.

"I'll take that as a yes." Touya sank to his knees and let the beautiful petals settle onto his hair and shirt. They felt like ash sifting down from a fire, soft and insubstantial. There were so many, and he squeezed two fists full of them, willing his memory to return. It hurt so much, but he had to try. He had to discover Sakura's identity, or she would never regain her consciousness.

What are they, I wonder?

"It's not a tree that belongs here."

What?

"This tree wants moisture, and a cool climate. It could never survive in the badlands if it was alone."

What tree…?

Touya stared blankly into the darkness, watching the petals swirl before them. They were flying, flying down from the limbs of a thin and delicate tree. A breeze was blowing, scattering them like the ash from a fire over his face and hands. Delighted, he held out his arms and spun around once.

"I don't have very much magic. But I have enough to give this tree what it needs. I have to take care of it. But I don't mind, because it's so beautiful. Do you understand?"

"No," Touya whispered. "No, I don't understand."

He was staring up at the bright blue sky, fascinated with the way it contrasted against the fluffy pink petals. Her long silky hair blew in the wind, petals catching in it.

"She needs someone to take care of her, just like the tree she is named for. She can't be alone yet. Can you do it?"

Touya reached out and brushed the smooth bark of the tree. Its texture was solid and comforting.

"Yes, I can do it," he said slowly, beginning to realize what she was talking about. "I can take care of her. Because she's so beautiful."

The tree disappeared from his fingertips. His mother told him that he had to take care of Sakura. He understood that, though he didn't know why.

"Do you see, Sakura?" he said aloud. "People do care about you. My own mother told me I had to take care of you."

She said nothing, but he could feel her curiosity. He felt a little excited himself. Perhaps they had been intended to be together after all, and his mother was preparing him for his role.

"It's always been us, Sakura, don't you see that? You do belong somewhere. You belong with me. The two of us, together."

The petals swirled in the darkness once more, briefly forming a symbol that he'd never seen before. It looked like a circle split down the middle, forming the image of two fish touching tail to nose. Then it dissipated into a formless cloud again.

"Sakura," he repeated carefully. "And Touya. Kinomoto."

He recalled then the experience at the temple, and desperately tried to flesh out that memory.

"This is how you write my name. Tou-ya Kin-o-moto."

"Da taught me. He says it's a secret, that I shouldn't tell anybody I know how to do this, but I guess I can tell you."

"Teach me," she pleaded.

"You're too young. You can't do it yet."
"Touya!" She pouted, her green eyes growing bigger and misty.

"You're such a little pest sometimes. Fine, I'll show you. Watch carefully now, I won't do it again. This how you write my name. Tou-ya Kin-o-moto."

"My name now," she demanded.

"Sa-ku-ra," he demonstrated, then carefully ripped the parchment in half. "Here. Keep this. That way, you'll always know your name. And I'll always have mine."

He folded the fragile paper and slid it into one boot. His father had warned him over and over to never leave scraps behind when practicing writing. It was dangerous to leave such evidence lying around.

Touya still couldn't see Sakura; the images were hazy and unfocused. But he could clearly see the parchment with his name printed across it. So that was how he knew. He'd completely forgotten about that old scrap of paper. If it wasn't for that, he probably would have grown up thinking his name was 'boy'. Blade had caught him staring at it one night, finally, and ripped it to shreds.

"No," he choked. The tiny scraps of parchment wafted down through the air, settling like the ash from fire on the cold metal transport floor before him. He still had no idea where it had come from or who had written the name, but it was special to him and he felt tears welling up in his eyes as he watched the monster tear it apart. He didn't know who the monster was, but he let him sleep in his home and gave him food every night. He didn't want to make the monster angry.

"No, I don't want to remember this!" Touya gripped his head in his hands, trying to block the memories as they woke up inside him. Blade had finally appeared, and he didn't want to see him murder his parents. He didn't want to see his own kidnapping.

One of the petals brushed over his nose, forcing him to open his eyes again. She was waiting, waiting to see where she came from. He was her only hope.

"I'm sorry, Sakura… but I'm afraid to let it come out. I don't want to watch. He killed my parents."

There was a sense of sadness, and then indifference. It didn't seem to bother her very much, and with horror he watched the petals begin to wink out into the darkness.

"Wait, wait! Don't go. Just, please… I – I'm scared."

Unhappily he watched them continue to disappear. He was taking too long, what was left of her was scattering into the void. He couldn't let that happen.

"No! Don't leave! I'll do it; I'll keep going. We'll watch it together, okay?"

Together…

"Yes, together, you and me. I can't do this alone, Sakura. I need you to stay with me, okay?"

She said nothing, but the petals stopped disappearing. Touya gulped and took a deep breath.

"Okay, let me think. I've remembered something about this. Fire, and explosions. He attacked my home. Because my father was writing things, writing about the history of the ruins. I know that much."

His hands shook as the image came back to him: the sword, cutting down his mother. She crumpled to the floor, her face and body covered by her long beautiful hair. The blood spilled out from beneath. Blade didn't pause but immediately braced the tip against the throat of the other man, held in the grip of two soldiers.

"Da…" Touya whispered the half-remembered name. His father. He was saying something now; something that made the Reptil angry, although only Touya would notice the change. A flash of steel, and the man slumped in his captors' arms.

"No," he howled, striking the air angrily. If only he'd been there! If only he could have done something! "It's not fair, damn it! It's not fair! He killed them. He killed my parents and left me all alone in the world. I hate him! He took everything from me!"

He railed at the darkness for a little while, before stopping to take a ragged breath.

"It's not fair. It's just not right."

He leaned over and rested his hands on his knees, trying to hold back sobs. He was so busy trying to gain control over himself that it was a while before he noticed what he'd said.

"I wasn't there. I couldn't have helped anyway, but I wasn't there. I only saw that image from his sword, that wasn't my memory."

So where was I?

He folded the fragile paper and slid it into one boot. His father had warned him over and over to never leave scraps behind when practicing writing. It was dangerous to leave such evidence lying around.

"Don't lose it now."

"I won't."

There was a horrible explosion on the far side of the ruins, and Touya jumped to his feet.

"What was that?"

"Touya!"

"It's okay, it's okay. It's not going to hurt you." He forced his voice to sound calm and assured, even though he was as confused and scared as she was. He peeked outside of the old ruin they'd been playing in, and was greeted with the sight of his home in flames. A group of men in black were walking away from it, a scaly green creature in front of them.

"Da, Mama!" Touya lost his head and starting running toward his home, forgetting his companion for the moment. She couldn't run as fast as he could and was quickly left behind, her pleas for him to slow down falling upon deaf ears. The little boy could only think of one thing: getting back home.

"I left you behind," Touya sobbed, guilt blossoming within him. "You were mine to care for and I left you behind. I'm sorry. I was so scared; I needed to find my parents. I had to see them alive and all right."

He was begging for her forgiveness, but she said nothing. The petals were waiting expectantly.

And then the artillery opened up and began to destroy everything in sight. Touya screamed and crashed to the ground, covering his head with his arms and quaking as hell erupted around him. Everything was exploding. The noise and heat were terrifying, and the crackle of nearby flames pinned him to the ground with fright. Upon looking up, he realized that he was alone. His home was completely gone; not even a recognizable structure still stood. All the buildings that his father had studied so carefully were demolished.

And Sakura was nowhere to be seen.

He'd lost her. How could he lose her? Touya stumbled through the nightmare world of burning ruins and collapsing structures, calling out desperately.

"I told you to be careful," he mumbled, over and over again. There was no one to hear. "I told you not to go far. You were supposed to hold my hand, not let go. Where are you?"

He brushed a few tears away from his dirty cheeks and looked around, but there was no one familiar to comfort him, no one to calm his terror. Everything that had been his home was gone, and he had to find her. He wasn't even sure why anymore, but he had to find her.

"Sakura!"

"You were right behind me," Touya continued to plead to the darkness. "How could you disappear so quickly? Where did you go?"

Frantically the boy darted through the maze of heat and flames, a collapsing building nearly burying him. Ash from the fires was everywhere, settling onto his shirt and hair and dusting him gray. He scrambled over a pile of boulders and slid down a gravelly scree. What if she'd gone back to hide in their little shelter? What if –

No. Warned by some primeval instinct, she had fled the buildings and come here, to her favorite place. The tree that his mother had planted. Undisturbed by all the violence taking place around it, its pink petals flew merrily through the air.

Touya exhaled in relief as he saw her crumpled up in its shade, sobbing, but that relief was short lived when he realized they were in plain sight of the metal transports. They had the bad men inside them. They had to get away.

"Sakura, come here." He held out his hand, whispering, but she wouldn't move, just clutched at the tree and continued to cry. "Please, Sakura, take my hand. We have to get out of here. Are you listening to me? Sakura?"

She was out of her head with fright, and not paying any attention to him. He winced as she began to cry louder, and heard the footsteps of someone marching down the ramp.

"Sakura, please!"

Panicked, he placed his hand over her mouth and pushed her down on the ground, covering her small body with his as the creature walked toward them. He could feel her shaking and giving muffled sobs.

"Quiet," he hissed into her ear, and tried to keep still. Maybe the bad men wouldn't bother with them, maybe if they didn't move they would be ignored. Shivering with fear, he watched a large pair of boots pace across the ground in front of his face. He didn't dare look up.

"Ssso Kinomoto did have a child. How interessting."

There was a whoosh of air above their heads, and then a thud as the top half of his mother's tree crashed to the ground. Touya cringed, and Blade laughed his horrible Reptilian laugh before resheathing his sword.

"Get up, boy."

Touya didn't move, and the Reptil kicked him sharply in the ribs. The skinny boy yelped with pain, reflexively rolling back to keep out of range.

"What'ss thisss? Two of them?"

Touya watched in horror as the monster picked up Sakura by one wrist, holding her out at arms' length and examining her curiously as she cried.

"Pretty little child…" he murmured. "Perhapsss I will take her."

"No!" Touya shouted. "Put her down!" Forgotten was his terror as he leapt to his feet and kicked the creature as hard as he could in the shin. It couldn't have hurt much, but the attack surprised Blade enough that he released his hold and dropped her to the ground.

She collapsed into a heap, but Touya dragged her to her feet and pushed her into a run.

"Run, Sakura! Go, go!" Confused, she stumbled forward a few steps, then looked back at his scream of pain. Annoyed, Blade had swiped his claws across his back, drawing blood and knocking Touya to the ground.

"Come here, girl," the commander ordered, and she froze at the sight of his sharp teeth and yellow eyes.

"No," Touya moaned, remembering. The sick desire in his master's eyes… he would do anything to keep her out of his claws. Anything. Even if it meant taking her place.

"Run fast, Sakura!" Touya pleaded. "Run away!" He threw himself in the path of the Reptil as he walked toward the helpless girl, and almost succeeded in tripping him.

"Insssolent brat," Blade snapped, and struck Touya across the face so hard that he hit the ground again, breathing hard. But he would not be browbeaten. Shakily he got to his feet and raised his fists.

"Keep - " Touya whispered. I remember. Keep away from my –

"Keep away from my sister!"

The petals froze in midair, shocked into stillness. Touya's heart ceased to beat; everything came to a stop.

"Sister!"

"Sister!"

"Sister!"

Over and over again the word echoed in his mind, until his heart began to beat again, and the blood resumed its flow.

Sister. Of course. She is mine. She has been mine since she was born, mine to take care of. My parents are her parents too. Blade didn't destroy my family; he destroyed our family. We are both Kinomoto.

He had an extraordinarily vivid image of Sakura's face, but it was not her face. He had only known her when she was a child. This face was framed by beautiful long wavy hair, blowing in the breeze, studded with errant pink petals.

That's the face I know. It wasn't hers, after all. It was our mother's. Somehow, I managed to keep it in my heart for all those cycles until I found her daughter. The girl I was meant to be with, the girl I was meant to protect. And protect her I did. I didn't lose her after all. I saved her from a horrible fate.

Dazed, Touya watched the Reptil pick up the scrappy boy by his collar, laughing at his attempts to kick and punch in midair.

"How amusssing. Thiss one wantss to fight." Looking up, he saw the little girl had disappeared over the rocks, and shrugged. It wasn't worth the trouble to go after her; the little imp would die out here in the middle of nowhere. Meanwhile, he had Kinomoto's son in his claws. After a moment's thought, he smiled, baring his sharp teeth. The little boy quivered at the sight, then flinched as that long tongue came snaking out and tickled his face.

"I won't kill thisss one. I have a better idea." And with the boy still struggling and kicking helplessly, he turned and left the scene of destruction and marched up the ramp into his personal transport, tossing Touya carelessly in the corner.

Watching, Touya couldn't be sure whether it was an accident or not, but the boy's head struck the metal walls and he slumped over on the floor in a heap.

"And that's how it begins," he concluded wearily, rolling over onto his side and feeling a few tears leak out. The petals fell softly onto his skin, decorating him. "I suppose maybe I remembered some things, on waking up, but it was so fuzzy, and my head hurt so much. There was no one to tell me who I was, no one to remind me. There was only the monster. He ruled my world. Thinking about what happened just hurt inside, so I pushed it away, made myself forget. I didn't have the luxury of grieving for my family. I had to please him. I had to survive."

He rolled over onto his back and stared up the darkness. There were so many of them now, floating softly down onto him. Touya thought it must be like that phenomenon he'd heard other soldiers from the north talk about. That thing called snow.

"I suppose someone found you and took care of you. Thank the gods for that. And then somehow you ended up in the Resistance. Brother and sister, torn apart, fighting and killing for the opposite sides of the struggle. It's more ironic than even Blade realized. But somehow our bodies knew more than our minds. We were born with magical ability, but we forgot. Just touching you woke it up inside of me, and it was the same for you. Being together made us more powerful. I wish I knew if destiny brought us back together again, or if it was all just some crazy coincidence, but I'm happy you helped me to remember. It was painful, but I had to know. We all have to know where we come from, who we are. How else can we go forward?"

You saved me.

"I'm your older brother. Our mother told me to take care of you. Of course I did. I couldn't let him hurt you."

You do care for me.

"Haven't I been saying that?"

He held his hand up and grasped at a few of the petals. His mother said she was named for that tree. Did that mean it was called a sakura tree?

"Our parents must have loved you very much," he continued. "You look just like Mother, you know. You have her eyes."

Oh…

The feeling of her was getting stronger, more tangible, and he smiled.

"You don't belong here, in this oblivion. You are Sakura Kinomoto. You have an identity, a self, you are someone. And I refuse to live my life without you; you're the only family I have left. Will you come back to me, Sakura? Come back to us?"

The petals – sakura petals, he supposed – had settled thickly onto his face while he was looking up, and he closed his eyes. Their scent was sweet and fragrant. Feeling drained but at peace, he inhaled, then exhaled. It wouldn't be long now.

In and out. In and out.

He could hear her breathing too, now, but didn't open his eyes just yet. The feel of the flower petals against his skin was growing warmer, approaching body temperature.

There was just one more thing that he had to say.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

He opened his eyes and smiled. She was still in his arms, her head on his knee as he rested his forehead against hers. Her heartbeat was stronger now; he could feel it. Her breathing was deeper. Moving slightly to the side, he kissed her gently on the cheek, then pulled away. She was awake now, gazing at him, and then she blinked and spoke again.

"Touya. You saved me." She reached around to hug him tightly, and he complied, squeezing her slim body happily. "Thank you."

"It was nothing. And now, I think, you have to save us."

- - - - - -

Keroberos howled in pain as another of Nietzsche's attacks penetrated his defense and left him gasping. The long flight from the rebel base to the castle had taken its toll, and he could feel his strength draining. Yue was only slightly fresher, and it was he that was maintaining the shield that kept them alive.

Sakura watched him buckle under another lightning bolt and then push his shield outward, the air around him shimmering silver with the effort of it. She'd never seen anything like him, but she thought he was breathtakingly beautiful.

"Who are they?" she murmured.

"I'm not really sure. But they're on our side. They helped keep me alive so I could find you."

She nodded, feeling another flutter inside her at the small movement. That feeling of bottled-up energy that she'd been feeling for so many days had returned in force. Her body was quivering with it, and it frightened her. That alien concept of magic, which she had only discovered that morning, was now flooding her body and demanding to be used. Only she didn't know how.

Touya felt her move to stand and he loosened his hold on her.

"No," she said quickly. "No, don't let go. I c-can't control it, I need your help. You were always the stronger one. I need you."

She was clutching him and looking at him with pleading eyes.

"It's okay, Sakura. I won't let go if you don't want me to. You're going to be all right." Carefully, slowly, he stood up, pulling her to her feet. He could feel her shaking in his arms as he stood behind her, grasping her hands in his. Uncertainly she squeezed her fists together, then relaxed them again.

How? How do I do it? I can feel it; I know I have the power, but I don't know how to work it.

Her body was still adjusting to the recent change and she felt her knees buckle with the mental strain. Touya had to wrap his arms around her to keep her upright.

"I d-don't know how to do it."

"You can," he whispered into her ear. "I heard them say you can do it. They're fighting for you, Sakura. They believe in you."

With a sense of dread she watched the silver one's shield falter. Nietzsche clapped his hands together and rammed them both with a wave of power. There was a screech of pain from the golden cat, and Nietzsche gave a shout of triumph. It had been a hard fought battle, but he had vanquished the Guardians. His master could not fail to recognize him now. He would surely be rewarded. One last burst of energy on his part, and a yellow streak shot toward them. Both Yue and Kero flinched, but the attack was cut short. A pink orb of light surrounded them both, protecting them. All three beings looked up with surprise.

Sakura was biting her lip in concentration, staring at her shield as she struggled to keep it going. Touya could feel her heartbeat under his arms, going fast and hard. Yue watched the shield flicker and fade, then renew itself as she tried to gain control.

"Clow's heir has awakened," he declared proudly, drawing himself up to his full height. Beside him, he could hear Kero panting but holding his head up high.

Lothar lowered his hand, just short of delivering a fatal attack on the Li boy, and stared. Everybody was staring at the quivering girl in the captain's arms.

"You have no chance," Yue informed his attacker. "Surrender."

Nietzsche hesitated as he watched Sakura's heavy breathing. She looked so little and helpless.

"She still has no control," he sneered at last. "Weakling, pitiful girl." Sakura's attention went from the shield to him, and the pink glow disappeared. He was watching her disdainfully, the look in his eyes all too familiar. The look that Li used to give her until not so very long ago.

"She can no more hurt me than she can - "

He disappeared. Touya blinked at the abruptness, but there was no mistake. One moment he'd been there, and the next he was gone. Erased.

"Whoa," he breathed, and Sakura took a gasping breath. She could not believe she had just done that, but she had. The inexplicable power, how it just shot right through her body and forced its way to the mocking mage. It felt so good to wipe him out of existence.

"I – I didn't mean to - "

Lothar's scream of rage split the night, and everyone's head jerked up. He stood in the center of the tower, glowing with malicious hatred.

"Must everything conspire against me?" he raged. His chance, his wonderful chance, was gone. The One chosen to inherit the Seal's magic had awakened, and his opportunity to steal her power was gone forever. She stood now before him, having eliminated his strongest servant, tiny and frail but powerful enough to kill him. "I will not tolerate anything that threatens me!"

No one had a chance to react before he slammed his staff into the floor again, and Touya saw two waves of energy cascade from each hand. They flooded and enveloped the Guardians and Li, drawing a scream of pain from the latter.

"Li!" Sakura shrieked, terrified. He dropped his sword and crashed to the ground, struggling not to writhe with the unbearable pain that coursed through his body. Lothar smiled cruelly at her expression.

"Save them if you can, little girl. Are your powers enough to rescue them all, I wonder?"

She risked a glance over to the other two; the cat was struggling to remain upright with bared claws, and the man was on his hands and knees, gasping at the attack. Another scream tore from Li's lips, and she wavered indecisively.

"Concentrate, Sakura," Touya said from behind her. "You can do this, you can save them. I trust you."

Sakura vacillated only a moment longer before squeezing her eyes shut and hugging Touya's arms to her chest even tighter. His presence was a solid comfort, a rock to hang on to. The feel of his magic was so similar to hers, now that she recognized it within him. She used it to guide her as she endeavored to break the spell.

I can do this, I know I can. I can force it away. If only I knew how…

His magic was so dark and twisted, and she flinched at the feel of it. It was surrounding Li and the others, pressing in on them, suffocating them. They would be crushed underneath it if she didn't help. Tentatively, she gave a mental push, but there was only a harsh recoil as its defenses repelled her.

Touya winced when she uttered a sharp cry of pain and buckled again. She was breathing raggedly and fighting him, in her struggle to break the spell. Determinedly he held her tightly, breathing deeply and evenly into her hair, hoping to calm her.

Lothar watched her, flailing helplessly in her attempt to deflect his spell. Unhappily he came to a stop before her and raised his staff. She was totally unaware of his nearness, a hapless target. The moonlight glinted off the sharp point as he prepared to stab. This was not the way he had wished it, but there was no other alternative. She could kill him, and Lothar never allowed anyone to survive that could threaten his existence.

Touya felt a tingle of danger and looked up to see him.

"Sakura…" he whispered urgently into her ear. There was no time to say anything else, but with a rush of understanding he realized that she knew exactly what was happening, could quite easily hear his warning. There was a connection between them like no other.

Sakura raised her head just before Lothar stabbed, and caught his staff in one hand, stopping it just short of fatal penetration. Touya's hand was still over hers, and he shivered with the feel of magic. It had been so fast, he hadn't even realized his hand had moved. She was grasping the smooth metal pole, holding it away from herself with no apparent effort. Even Lothar was stunned, and did not try to pull away as he locked gazes with her green eyes. They faithfully reflected the moonlight, glittering in the darkness.

"You will hurt no more," she said calmly. Touya felt her muscles relax and loosen under his hold, and her thoughts begin to solidify. The immediate threat had sharpened her focus, was bringing her magic in line. "Your reign of destruction is over."

For once, Lothar could not reply to such a rebellious statement. There was a power settling itself deep within those green eyes, preparing itself. For the first time, Lothar felt actual fear. Not since he had drawn on the magic of the Seal and begun his rule of Tomoeda had he felt such an all-consuming dread.

She could kill him. She really could.

"Your time here is through."

Touya's eyes widened as her hand underneath his exerted a slight pressure, and began to bend the staff upwards. Slowly and smoothly, she forced the sharp point up toward the sky. Lothar said or did nothing, still hypnotized by her glassy stare. He did not see the Guardians or Li collapse with relief against the marble floor, released from his attack.

Sakura's voice dropped in volume, becoming almost soft. She wanted to pity him, almost, she really did. But she could not, for he had caused so much misery in this world.

"And now you die."

Lothar never saw it coming. Entranced, the old sorcerer never saw the attack that ended his life. He never saw Li slice his head cleanly off with the sword.

Sakura trembled with the shock of battling Lothar's magic, the concept of victory still unknown. It had happened so quick, so fast, that no one spoke as the body, the head, and even the staff all turned to ash. The night breeze scattered the remains, whisking them away from the silent rooftop.

"Thanks," Li rasped, and braced his sword against the floor to lean on. He could never remember being so exhausted in his entire life, but there was a sense of closure deep within him. He'd done it; he'd ended the life of the one who killed his family. He had fulfilled his promise to himself.

"Don't mention it," Sakura whispered. He held her gaze for another silent heartbeat before he stumbled and almost fell. "Li! Oh, Li, are you all right?" Anxiously she broke free of Touya's grasp and hurried forward. He was shaking his head, trying to clear his thoughts, and she held up one hand against his face. That he was even alive, after facing off against Lothar, was a miracle. She couldn't believe that he'd survived, that they had both survived.

"I'm fine," he replied, and gave her a curious look. "How do you feel?"

"I'm okay. Why?"

"Because," he panted, "you're floating."

What?

She glanced down at the floor and saw that she was indeed hovering over it. She hadn't even noticed, out of concern for him.

"Oh. I guess I am."

"I gotcha," Touya offered, and gently pulled her back down, holding her firmly around the waist. Sakura saw the look in Li's eyes and was about to explain when the other two interrupted her.

"Mistress," the man said. "At long last you have received his powers. I am yours to command." He knelt gracefully before her, his wings settling flat on his back and covering him with a cloak of white feathers.

"Um, I - "

"At long last," rumbled the cat, bowing his head before her. "It is an honor to serve and protect you."

"But, I – who are you?"

"Don't you recognize me?" He looked up, with an amused gleam in his golden eyes. "Keroberos, Sun Guardian of the Seal?"

"Kero?"

"The one and same. Your assumption of power allowed me to return to my true form. I beg your forgiveness that I did not recognize you when we first met. I swear I sensed no magic in you."

"And I am Yue," said the other. "The Moon Guardian. We were created by our master to serve and protect the Seal and whomever it chose to bear its power. We pledge our devotion to you, Sakura, new Mistress of the Seal – and ruler of Tomoeda."

She gave a surprised squeak and tried to speak up, but Li prevented her.

"Well. I knew you had it." The look in his eyes was unreadable. "But I didn't realize just how much you had. My lady."

And much to her dismay, he took a step back and knelt as well, laying his precious sword on the floor in front of him.

"No," she whimpered, then said it again, stronger. "No. No, please get up, all of you. I didn't want this. I'm just a girl… this isn't me."

"You're wrong." Yue turned his face up and gave her an earnest look. "This is you. I knew it the moment I saw you through his eyes, all those cycles ago. You are the one. You were destined for it. Clow chose you."

Sakura put a hand to her head. It was all too much: the terrifying capture and imprisonment, the shock of absorbing so much power, the startling realization of who she was, and the destruction of Nietzsche and Lothar. So much was coming at her, and she didn't know how to deal with any of it. She only knew that she could not do it alone.

"Li, please stand up," she begged. He was staring fiercely at the floor, and she managed to force her body down onto her hands and knees. He would not look at her, but turned his face to the side.

"Please, Li, I'm sorry." At that he looked up.

"For what?"

"For last night. I'm sorry, I should have listened to you. I should have believed you. And I almost killed you with that storm. I'm so sorry. Will you forgive me?"

She extended a hand, reaching to brush his bangs away from his eyes, but he intercepted it and caressed it tenderly.

"Of course I forgive you. You didn't know. And now you've proved me right, you really are a sorceress." He flashed a quick look at Touya and then looked down again, swallowing. "You found your power with him. I – I guess he's the one you were meant to be with after all."

"Oh…" She melted at his expression, how he was trying so hard to cover up the pain. "Yes, he is. But I don't love him, not the way I love you. Syaoran."

He looked up again at the sound of his name, a glimmer of hope in his eyes.

"You mean…"

"I can't do this without you, Syaoran. You said you could help me understand my power, help me control it. I need you. Please… I love you."

His heart thudded loudly at those words; he could scarcely believe he was hearing this, but there could be no mistake. She was looking at him in a way that he had only dreamed of before. No more doubt and confusion was present. She only had eyes for him.

And then neither of them could stand it any longer and leaned forward into the kiss, their first since that kiss atop the mesa. It felt more wonderful than anything, and Li felt a second wind renewing his body when they finally pulled apart.

Unable to contain himself, he leapt to his feet and lifted Sakura into his arms, spinning around once. She shrieked in surprise, but laughed and clutched him tightly. He couldn't believe it. He really couldn't believe it. All-powerful, beautiful, and perfect in every way, and she had chosen to be with him.

Touya watched them embrace, surprised at the tiny little spark of envy that still remained. Then he shook his head at himself and grinned. She was his, after all, his sister to protect and support. The words of the one called Yue filled him with uncertainty about what the future held for Sakura; but he knew he'd be damned if anyone ever hurt her again.

It was his mission.

The Sun and Moon Guardians just exchanged glances and smiled as she and the Li boy kissed again. They had risen, and it was time for the land of Tomoeda to begin healing. A new age was about to prevail, one of peace and learning. Sakura would rule it fairly. They knew it was to be so, for their master had foreseen it. "The One will come," he had said, "and you will be summoned. The land will be blessed again."

With the rising of the Sun and the Moon.

- - THE END - -

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Disclaimer: I do not own these characters