Disclaimer: Not mine.

Author's Note: I wrote this for the SPN Spring Fling over on LJ, for Paleonut. The prompt was "What is your quest?"

Many thanks to everyone involved, and to Cheryl for the quick beta.

Rating: PG

Summary: Sam and Dean go to Moondor for some downtime. Too bad nobody warned the LARPers what was coming. Spoilers through to 8.23, Sacrifice.

The Perilous Quest of Lord Dean of Winchester

"You sure you're good?" I ask Sam again. "I mean it. If you feel sick, you tell me and we'll be out of here."

"I'm fine, Dean."

"You're sure? Charlie's going to have a Solstice Jubilee every year. We don't have to do this if you're not up to it. How did you sleep last night?"

"Dean." Sam pats my arm. "I'm not 100% yet, but I'm getting there. I'll be fine. This is nowhere near as strenuous as what we do for a living."

"Yeah, OK." I put the car in park and get out, grabbing the duffel that has both our stuff and a couple of guns, just in case. "Come on. Let's get in costume and go find the Queen of Moons."

"Lord Dean of Winchester!" Charlie says brightly. "And Lord Sam. Thank you for answering my call."

"Anytime, Your Majesty. So what do you have for us today?"

"Hold!" Charlie calls, although I don't see the point, since we're the only ones in the tent. She leans forward on her throne. "There isn't much happening today. The real fun starts tomorrow. Today you can look around, get to know people… If you want, I can have Stan set you up with a short personal quest for the afternoon. That'll get you experience points."

"Sure," I say. "We can do that. I'll find Stan. Sam – you want to let Garth know where we are, just in case he hears from Kevin?"

Sam nods and goes out.

"Listen," I tell Charlie as soon as he's out of earshot, "Sammy's still not fully recovered from the trials. Anybody messes with him, I will kill them."

"Dean. You realize that this is a camp full of geeks who couldn't bench-press ten pounds and Sam's… well, Sam?"

"He's vulnerable right now. And if I see any of these geeks taking advantage of that, hurting Sam or upsetting him in any way, they're going to be quitting Moondor for good. So you let them know that. They stay clear of Sam, nobody has to die, we're all happy. Now where do I find Stan?"

"Hey!" I say, coming up behind a short guy who looks vaguely familiar. "Are you Mordan the Furious?"

"I am. Who are you?"

"My name is Dean of Winchester."

"What is your quest?"

"The Queen sent me to find you. She said you have important news for me."

"Hold!" Mordan snapped. Then he sidled up to me. "Charlie must've given you a number?"

"Oh… Yeah. Twenty-three."

"Twenty-three… That's… Hold on." He pulls out his cell phone and starts flicking through the menus. "Twenty-three. Got it. Hey!" Stan waves at a guy standing nearby, who saunters over. "This is Dean of Winchester. Set him up for Quest 4B. Dude, you can go hang out there and watch the swordfighting. Someone'll be along to tell you about your quest soon." He backs away from me. "Resume!"

It's half an hour before someone comes to me. I've been spending that time by myself, Sam apparently having decided that the geeks in the Time Portal tent are better company than I am.

I suppose it's a good thing if the kid's having fun.

"Dean of Winchester?" a voice says, and I turn to see a very hot woman in a very diaphanous white dress.

"Yeah?" I ask, grinning, because if this is Quest 4B, bring it.

"I am Aurnia, Sorceress of the North. I was sent by the Queen of Moons. This message just arrived for you."

She holds out a scroll. I take it and open it.

There are four lines in barely-legible curly writing.

Lord Dean of Winchester,

I have your treasure.

If you want it back, you must abandon the service of the Queen of the Moons and join me.

Narg, King of the Shadow Orcs

"So… Aura –"

"Aurnia."

"Aurnia. What do I do now? And what treasure has he taken? I don't have anything valuable."

"He probably took your shield, if you left that in your tent. You will be shamed if you appear in battle without a shield – that means you'll lose nearly all your XP – so you must either ally with the Shadow Orcs or track down their lair and recover it."

"So I'm guessing we go for tracking and recovery?"

"I will be your guide." She smiles at me. "We should begin at your tent."

When I step into the tent, the first thing I see is that our shields, both Sam's and mine, are right on the bed where we left them after the Quartermaster issued them to us.

Aurnia frowns when she sees them.

"What else could they have taken?" I ask.

"Your sword?"

"I've got it."

"Then I do – oh!" She points at my pillow. "There's a note."

I pick up the new scroll and unroll it.

You have till sunset to surrender, or he dies.

"What?" I say out loud.

Aurnia takes the scroll. "You have a friend?" she asks after she's read it. "A companion?"

"You mean they've taken Sam?"

I march into Charlie's tent. Aurnia's trailing after me yelling something about protocol, but I ignore it.

Stan's there. Awesome. Just the son of a bitch I wanted to see.

"You," I growl, picking him up and slamming him against one of the tent poles. "Mordan the Freaking Moron. Where is he?"

"You got the message?" he chokes out. "Aurnia will show you the nearest Shadow Orc encampment. They might be willing to give you information… for a price."

"For a price? Like what? Maybe if I give them your worthless hide?"

"Dean!" Charlie protests.

"Shut up, Your Majesty. You." I shake Stan. "Where is he?"

"You must hurry," Stan gets out. "The message may have given you time till dusk, but he might reveal details of our secret weapons if they torture him for information."

"If they what?"

"Shadow Orcs know no mercy."

Yeah, well, neither do I when people think they can be humorous about my baby brother's safety. I let loose with a right hook. Stan's head snaps back, and he yelps, "Dude! You don't actually beat me up! We use rock-paper-scissors for fights."

"Wait!" Charlie yells. "Hold! Everyone out. You, Aurnia, are you Dean's guide? Then you stay here. Everyone else, out."

As soon as the room's empty, she says, "Dean, what the hell?"

"I warned you," I growl, not letting go of Stan. "I warned you what would happen if these sons of bitches looked at my brother wrong. You thought I was joking?"

"What are you talking about, Dean?"

"Quest 4B," Stan croaks. "You told me to set up Quest 4B for him."

"What does that have to do with his brother?" There's a pause, and then she realizes what's happened. "Oh my God. You took Sam?"

"It's in the terms of the quest."

"You were supposed to take his shield."

"Shield's boring. I just thought we'd switch it up. Always makes things more exciting when the Shadow Orcs have someone to torture." I growl at that, slamming Stan against the tent pole again. "Ow! Dude! We're not supposed to be in character right now."

"He's not in character," Charlie says. "I can't believe you were such an idiot!"

"What? We had the Shadow Orcs kidnap Gildor's sister last month and that was one of the best quests ever. Everyone got loads of XP."

"You kidnapped my brother for experience points?"

"Dude! We're not in character right now! You can stop threatening me."

"Stan," Charlie says, "Where's Sam?"

"I had the Yesteryear people give him to the Shadow Orcs in exchange for information about their army."

"You traded my brother… Where is he?"

"You'll have to find the main Shadow Orc encampment," Stan said. "That's where they keep all their prisoners. Unless they want to get information out of him, if they decide they want to torture Sam – ow! Charlie! Get this guy off me!"

"Next time you say 'torture Sam' like it's funny," I snarl, "I'm going to put a real bullet in your brain. I have absolutely no sense of humour when it comes to people threatening my brother. And, Charlie?" I add, turning to her. "Fair warning: if Sam's even a little traumatized by this, if he's so much as scraped his knee, I'm going to kill this guy." I shake Stan again. "And then I'm going to kill all the Shadow Orcs. And all the Yesteryear people. And –"

"We get the idea," Charlie interrupts. "Stan, you didn't actually hurt Sam, did you?"

"No!" Stan looks affronted. "When he came out of the Time Portal we told him we had a message from his brother, and I had six of the Yesteryear people waiting to jump him from behind and get him blindfolded and tied up."

"Six people? You set six people on my little brother?"

"Dude, have you seen the size of your little brother? Ow! God, no, we didn't hurt him. Just tied him up and took him to the Shadow Orcs."

"Call Mark," Charlie says. "Cancel the quest and tell him we want Sam back."

"Can't! Mark's gone to town for supplies. He won't be back till tomorrow."

"Then how do I get Sam back?"

"Finish the quest!"

"Halt, traveller! You trespass on the land of the Shadow Orcs. What is your quest?"

I raise my gun and point it at the Shadow Orc. "My name is Dean of Winchester. This is a deadly weapon from the future that will make so many holes in you there'll be nothing left to bury. Where is my brother?"

The Orc looks at Mordan. "Is he allowed to do that?"

"Just tell him," Mordan says.

"Sam was taken to the King in the Mountain."

"Show me."

"Yes," says the Shadow Orc guard, horns bobbing against his head as he nods. "We have Sam of Winchester."

"Where is he?" I demand.

"Is this your surrender?"

"Where is my brother?"

"No surrender, no brother," the Orc says.

"So… if I surrender, you'll take me to my brother now?"

"Not right away. You'll have to go to the King and negotiate the terms of your surrender. He might still want to hold your brother until he has all the information he wants." I thrust the gun into the Orc's face. He makes a high noise that sounds a lot like, "Meep," and scrambles away. "Dude, what the hell? Stan? How does he have a gun? I thought we're not having time travel this week!"

"Just tell us where the brother is."

"Is that a real gun? Dude, where did you get a real gun? I mean, I know there are stores, but that one looks like it's seen some action."

I fire into the air, and the Orc shuts up.

"My brother," I repeat.

I know, of course, that the Shadow Orcs aren't really torturing Sam (though I do have a contingency plan about killing them if they are). All the same, it's a relief when I finally make my way into their prison tent and find that Sam, other than being tied hand and foot to a chair, is completely unhurt. In fact, one of the Shadow Orcs is sitting with him showing him something in a book.

I like that Shadow Orc. Anybody who's keeping Sam amused can't be all bad.

"Hey," I say. Sam and the Shadow Orc both look up, and Sam smiles at me.

"Dean."

"You OK, kiddo?"

"I'm fine."

"No," the Shadow Orc hisses. "That's not what you're supposed to tell him. You've forgotten your lines."

"Believe me, you don't want me to tell my brother those lines."

The Shadow Orc makes a face, gets to his feet, and puts himself between me and Sam. "You are too late, Lord Dean of Winchester. Your brother has been screaming for us for hours. Our methods of inflicting pain may be crude, but they are effective. Your brother – ow!" He picks himself up off the floor, clutching his jaw. "You're not supposed to actually hit me!"

"Don't make jokes about hurting my little brother."

It's close to midnight when Charlie tiptoes into our tent.

"Did you get Sam back OK?" she asks.

"I'm fine!" Sam says. "I can't believe you let him freak out like that. What did you think they were going to do to me?"

"They had you tied up!" I growl. "That Shadow Orc is going down."

"Dean –"

"And you didn't even let me hit him again!"

"Dean! You were the one who wanted to be a mediaeval knight –"

"Yeah, and I bet a mediaeval knight would've kicked a Shadow Orc's ass if it kidnapped his baby brother."

"It's a game, Dean."

"It's barely a month since – since I almost lost you. Again. It isn't funny, Sam."

Sam eyes me for a moment. Then, with a half-grin at Charlie, he comes to where I'm sitting on my bed, drops down next to me, and reaches in for a hug. I roll my eyes, but I can't help hugging him back, even with the audience.

"I need you safe, Sammy," I whisper.

"I know."

"That's my boys!" Charlie says fondly, and then she tiptoes out of the tent.

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