Title: 1000th Love Song
Rating: T for now. possibly M later
Pairing: Kaworu x Shinji

Disclaimer: I own none of these characters!

THIS STORY CONTAINS MALExMALE RELATIONSHIPS. You have been warned.

Like the trembling strings of a piano struck with a precise tap of slender fingers upon its keys, the sounds fall into a melody of it's pianist. It came at first as a discordant resonance. His tears forming staccato hiccups; but gradually began to descend steadily like a sudden downpour of rain upon a hot summer day, soaking through a shirt the boy leaned on for support. The fragments of memories within his mind were like broken puzzle pieces - each and every one contributing to the formation of an even larger picture, each and every one too precious and important no matter how minuscule - for it was a picture that could never be complete if even one was to be missing.

'His' voice in the angel's memories was always meek and fragile, like a reflection within a pool which could become distorted at the simplest touch or breeze. But with patience it would come back to him at times. That is, with a lot of patience. And Nagisa Kaworu had become that patient because he knew that 'he' needed the time. Time of which he always seemed to have a lot of, yet was always running short of near the end. Especially in times of crisis. Especially when 'he' needed his time the most.

Sometimes Kaworu wished that time would stop, just... stop, to let the boy heal. To let him catch up. To, at the very least, let him gather up the shattered pieces - the broken bonds, the mangled self confidence and the trampled ego - that everyone had managed to rip out of his heart and to allow him to arm himself with thicker skin... But then Kaworu knew too... that it was because Ikari Shinji was so hopelessly delicate that he loved him. Because he was as fragile as that elusive image upon calm waters – the one ready to flee upon the first hint of wind - and as fragile as the teardrop that will inevitably splatter into a shapeless form as soon as it fell from his face that Kaworu loved him. Because underneath that thin shell, that one small, petite figure, lay an infinite number of human emotions that it made one almost a wonder how it was even possible for one person to feel so intensely, so intrinsically. But he did. Like several tornados and chaos contained in a glass shell, the emotions were just barely contained within Shinji. And Kaworu loved him. Loved him beyond all the pain and the suffering, beyond all of time and eternity, beyond even all of death and rebirth-

Kaworu loved him so.

–

A part of the process of accepting came accompanied with the process of letting go. One couldn't accept without letting go and one couldn't let go until one accepted.

Was that why he kept repeating? Because he could not let go? Because he refused to accept? Was that why he kept trying again and again and again to find that one path by repeating his life over and over and over again until he could cross out all the wrong ones?

Or perhaps it was the opposite. Perhaps he has accepted that there must be a path where Ikari Shinji can be happy. That there must be a way for such an ending to take place. And therefore it was, as an angel of free will, his duty to fight against his destiny until he could find that one door amongst infinity others that could lead him there. His resolution must be firm or else, a small tear at the seam will one day unravel him to the core.

First came the waiting. He always waited. At first it had been slow and painful but now it had become more like a meditation for Kaworu as he watched and waited while the events unfolded, watched and waited for the time their paths could cross again for surely they would. As always. And he used those years as a preparation.

This time, surely, he will bring him happiness.

He was starting to forget the exact number of times he had moved from one universe to the next but he knew they were well beyond several dozens. They were blurring together... and that wasn't a good sign. But Kaworu was never disheartened. He planned to keep trying infinite amounts of times to find that one universe. No matter how small the odds, there was still one possibility. One chance. And this time...this time this was possibly the...

"Kaworu-kun! Look out!"

There was a crash as Kaworu was forced to snap out of his thoughts. He jumped and dodged right before a building to his left fell on top of him, the one of which his brother Israfel had just knocked down.

"Honestly, I can't believe you have the leisure to daydream during an angel attack!" was the snappy voice to his left as the sharp voice of the Second Child rang a bit too loudly within his ear.

"Kaworu-kun, are you alright?!"

Kaworu calmly answered with a quick reassurance, "I'm fine Shinji-kun."

In this timeline, he was able to wait a little less, hurry up the process more... and was able to get to Shinji faster. In this timeline, Kaworu was able to be there for him a bit earlier before the tragedy of his comrades dying upon him and the betrayal could start. Perhaps... it was this timeline...

"Dammit, why is nothing working on this damn thing?!" The Second Child, Asuka screeched in annoyance. She was firing all her rounds into the angel and the angel swallowed it up as if it was just food. Well, Israfel did love food, Kaworu mused to himself.

"Aww geez, don't do that man! Cain't cha like aim or sumthin'?"

"Shut it, Fourth! I didn't ask for your expertise!"

To his right Kaworu could hear Shinji and Touji both groan. The First Child's Evangelion had been immobilized from the last angel attack and as a result wasn't able to be with them within this battle to help find this angel's weakness. Kaworu, as an angel himself, of course knew of his own brother's weak spot. But it wasn't up to him to give that information willingly. The Lilins must figure this out for themselves.

However, it wasn't until after Asuka had finished off all her magazines, the Fourth Child had tried beating it to a pulp, and the N2 mine used, that the female Lilin commander finally ordered them to retreat - before they could humiliate themselves further - after managing to freeze the angel for at least a week. Kaworu sighed as he sat back and returned to the base. They will all be sharply reprimanded he was sure. Asuka, however, will forever believe none of it was her fault and instead it was all theirs while further using this as a taunt within her forever-one-sided battle against Rei and Shinji- and recently Kaworu as well. As for Touji, the Fouth Child- well, he probably doesn't care one way or the other.

Ikari Shinji though... Kaworu wondered what he was thinking. Was he glad he survived? Or did he still wished that he had died, ending his suffering once and for all while fighting in hopes that his father will praise him at his death? His eyes wandered again to the monitor to his right to glance at the sullen serious face before the screen turned black.

–

They were scolded thoroughly of course by the Lilin who acted as their surrogate mother to the motherless children. 'Actually…' Kaworu thought to himself as he looked over at the quiet First Child who wasn't a part of the lot being scolded but still stood amongst them. Not all of them were Lilin, but certainly they were all motherless, like a group of orphans.

There was a quick jab to his side rib, not hard but enough to get his attention as Shinji tried to alert him.

"Nagisa-kun! Are you listening to me? You're not off the hook either! You sat there and just watched!" Captain Katsuragi Misato smacked her paperwork on top of the Sixth Child. Kaworu rubbed his head.

"I was analyzing the angel's movements." Kaworu deflected. The Second Child just snorted, "oh is that why you almost didn't move out of the way when a building almost collapsed on you?"

"All of you, the matter is very grave." The vice commander Fuyutsuki cleared his throat and glared down at the pilots who looked down sullenly... save for the two albinos. "The angel split into four completely different forms. We are lucky that it didn't further split into more with the way all of you attacked without strategy. Even luckier we were able to freeze their form temporarily."

Asuka and Touji both tried to defend themselves as Shinji just sighed defeatedly before muttering softly, "they're only making it worse by talking back." His words gave cause for Kaworu to glance to his side and to study the boy's morose face. The small quivering pout of his lower lips and those long downcast lashes... Kaworu wondered when he would ever get to...

"Nagisa-kun!" Kaworu's attention was snapped forward with the pain of his right ear being yanked roughly. He flinched at the Captain gaining his attention. "All of you will participate in the synchronization test. Now!" And she shoved the paperwork into his chest for him to clutch onto. That was when he noticed that everyone had gotten the battle plan already and Shinji was looking at him with a worried face.

"Kaworu-kun... are you alright?"

"Thirty eight..." Kaworu mumbled as he faced Shinji's confused expression. He smiled softly at those torn brown eyes while he finally finished calculating within his head so that everything was organized once more. "This is the thirty eighth time."

"Thirthy eighth... what? I don't understand, Kaworu-kun." Shinji tilted his head.

"It's nothing. I'm fine. You're too kind to worry over me." Kaworu chuckled as he massaged his painfully reddening ear.

Kaworu was once again reminded that the Lilin's A.T. Fields were … quite different from that of the angel's as he rubbed the pain away.

–

"Irefuuuuse to stoop to the lower level of that idiot!" Asuka was screeching as she tossed the headgear to the floor. The mat angrily flashed neon colored arrows that they were to step on in time with the beat of the music even after Asuka stepped haughtily off of it. Touji rolled his eyes and muttered more insults before Misato lost patience with them both and broke up their fight by physically pulling them apart.

"They're like cats and dogs." Shinji sighed as he sat in the sideline.

"Do you think so? I think they're both quite similar... which is why they fight regularly." Kaworu was sitting next to him while Rei sat on Shinji's opposite side while she quietly read her moves. Shinji turned his face in confusion, "really?"

Kaworu just smiled in reply. "You Lilins really are amazing. Using things like music in battles... your culture is so rich and interesting." Before the confused boy could ask what he had meant, Shinji was called up next to take the test with Touji. Kaworu watched as they nearly synched, but not perfectly. No... not as perfectly as he did with him. The Sixth Child's lips curl into a soft smile at that memory, at that sense of accomplishment and reaffirmation once again that they were meant to be together.

"Okay... that completes the test I suppose." Captain Katsuragi sighed as she scratched the side of her head with the tip of her pen. Asuka crossed her arms and huffed. "Naturally, none of them could match up to my speed and accuracy."

"Yes, but that's the problem Asuka," Misato was trying to break the news as gently as possible knowing how sensitive she could be. "At this rate, Shinji and Nagisa has the only 100% synch ratio, with Rei and Shinji being the 95%. The next best matches are Touji with Shinji with 85%, Rei and Nagisa with 85%, … and then you with Shinji as 75%, and you with Touji with 60%, you and Rei with 60% … Technically speaking, Shinji seemed to synchronize the best with everyone." Kaworu smirked inwardly. He knew he could technically synchronize better with others if he tried but he didn't on purpose.

Asuka muttered about how slow Shinji was and no wonder everyone could synchronize better if they were going slower. Kaworu noticed that the Third Child's face showed no hint of anger or any reaction. Just indifferent.

"Asuka," Misato said with a hint of exasperation. "If Rei's Eva wasn't damaged from the last battle..."

"You need me, admit it." Asuka cut her off.

Misato shrugged, "If you refuse to raise your synchro rate, we could always rewrite the core and have Rei..."

"Never! I'm not giving up my Eva!" Asuka screamed at her before she ran out the door. Misato folded her arms and sighed.

"Touji-kun. Please go get her."

"Eeeeh?! Why da aye gotta?!" Touji exclaimed in disbelief.

"Because we need her. And you have the best synchro rate with her other than Rei and Shinji. And we'll need to have Shinji be paired with Nagisa-kun at this rate." Misato sighed tiredly and murmured to herself "If only Mari was here..."

Kaworu overheard that and had thought that too earlier. The Fifth Child of this universe wasn't him but Mari Makinami Illustruious, another brilliant female pilot who seemed quite attached to Asuka when she was here briefly. Surely if she was around she could have kept Asuka in check more. But she was deployed to America... an insurance in case all the pilots in Tokyo-3 died simultaneously, Kaworu assumed. Their last ace card for the Lilin, secretly hidden away for their emergency. Let them keep their plans, the Lilin of the world government, SEELE, NERV, and other secret sectors. Kaworu's eyes were trained on only one goal.

"EEEEEEEEEEEH?!"

The unison of disgust snapped Kaworu's attention away from his thoughts and back into his reality once more. Touji had brought back Asuka and both were most unhappy when Captain Katsuragi gave her final decree.

"Like I said, this is a mission. Asuka and Touji are to live together and Shinji and Kaworu are to live together for a week. You two will memorize and synchronize everything, especially you two Asuka and Touji! We will simultaneously attack the core at once and destroy the four split angels and..." Touji and Asuka started speaking at once in total disgust with each other before Captain Katsuragi had to raise her voice firmly and with finality, "No buts, that's an order!"

Sometimes everything around him was seen through a filter, like watching the reality of a character unfold within a movie and Kaworu was just watching everything happen. But it was in times like these that Kaworu remembered that it was finally his part to play on the stage and not his role to merely observe. Shinji had been quiet until now, meekly accepting his role and living like an empty shell for the most part. In this universe, he was always overshadowed by the other pilots. In this universe, Shinji was considered the useless one. And Kaworu understood that Shinji was just there, living day by day without a purpose in his life other than just to live. Kaworu had recently joined them and barely had the chance to be together with him but now… now was the chance he had been seeking.

"Shinji-kun?" Kaworu raised his hand and showed his palm to the boy. "I look forward to working with you."

"Ah... yeah." Shinji hesitantly raised his own hand to place on top of his, a bit taken back from the sudden formality.

Kaworu watched intently without showing a hint on his face as those slender fingers were lightly placed on top of his palm.

The First Contact.

Kaworu could feel the boy's soft A.T. Field brushing against his own, their skin gently caressing each other's before Kaworu firmly wrapped his fingers around that tender hand.

Finally, his first contact in this universe. Though he had held this hand, touched this skin in so many different universes... each time was special, each time unique.

Like revisiting a first kiss.

Kaworu looked up at Shinji and gave him a reassuring smile.

"This time, I promise to bring you happiness."

Shinji merely tilted his head in more confusion before he chuckled awkwardly, trying to sound more at ease when he obviously wasn't. "Hahaha... K-Kaworu-kun... you really are weird."

Kaworu supposed that since Shinji cannot read his mind, he must have misunderstood that Kaworu had meant it in connection to their upcoming battle with the angel, or more awkwardly, their seven days living quarter situation... But no matter, even if Shinji's world view was smaller than his, Ikari Shinji and his happiness was everything to Nagisa Kaworu. And it wasn't wrong that, in part, the battles with the angels and the changes in their living quarters did have something to do with his promise, however, it was just only in part.

Right then Shinji let go, hurriedly fleeing the uncompromising situation as he made up an excuse about cleaning and packing things up. And Kaworu leisurely followed after him with an agreeable smile.

Author's Note: This story has been in my head for a month after watching the Eva Q Rebuild 3.33 yet I was so scared to write it since there's so many other stories just like this one and written better.

I hope people won't mind another version.

Thank you so much for those willing to give it a try. I hope i don't disappoint.

The next chapter is half done so I hope to put it up soon. Thank you for reading and the reviews. I'm very grateful.