Dear diary

Monday 27th feb 2012

Monday at school was really bad; as I got off the bus today I had a rotten egg thrown at my face. At interval my pants were pulled down and as I walked back to class the daily name calling begin. Slut, Whore and bitch the names I have heard from third form right threw to seventh form. One of the cool kids ripped my English work book and started to read out all the things I had written in it.

I

HEART

CHRISTIAN GREY

After she read this the whole class roared in laughter, I grabbed my book back from the girl and put it into my bag I run out of class with tears rolling down my face. I pulled out my cell phone and went throw my contacts until I came across the one I wanted, my mum. I dialled my mum's number and placed it to my ear, it rung a few times before she answered it. "Hey mum could you come and get me please, I'm not feeling very well." I said to her softly into the phone she told me her or dad couldn't come because they were at work but to ring nan or pops.

I left it thinking that I will get more crap if my Nan or my pops came and picked me up from school. The day went from bad to worse, the same cool kid got hold of you my sweet and loving dairy that yes I write everything into.

DEAR DIARY

WESNESDAY 1ST MARCH 2012

I got you back today diary it has been two really long and hard days without you. You are my best friends, I don't have any really friend my mum and dad think I have lots but umm no I'm noting and no one in school I'm a nobody. I hope that Kate didn't read you because you have everything in you, my crush for Christian Grey and what I want to do to him. My love of dancing and singing, my shower head really loved me. My fears and my wishers and my dreams and my goals. I really hope that nobody has seen or read you my life would end. My cutting had got better than it used to be, I always cover my arms and legs so nobody see the red and angry lines that run across them. It's been a week since I lasted cut and I am started to get over the voice in my head to cut a again, I was badly bulled in Maths again today but the teacher just sat there and made it look and feel like nothing had happened. I seen Christian again today oh my how his uniform top shows off the size of his chest, he was running track with some mates for rugby. That was the sexiest thing I have ever seen and his muscles what I would give to lick whip cream off them. Any way it's off to bed for me so I can dream of the man of my dreams.

DEAR DIARY

THURSDAY 2ND MARCH 2012

Today has been the worse day of my life today, you know how I told you that a mean cool kid got hold of you a few days ago well they had made copies of you and put you all over the walls of the hallway and the lockers which run along some of the walls. Everything I had put into you was out and proud and it doesn't stop there I got a note in my locker today telling me to meet this person at the back of the school. I walked to the back of the school and there stood Christian Grey and his girlfriend, he pulled her in and kissed her heart out he turns to me and said "what the hell are you looking at hoe." I walked away with my head down and my arms across my chest and tears pouring down. I got home and run up the stairs and into the bathroom and into the draw under the cardboard. I grabbed out a razor blade and brought it to my skin and pull it across and across again. My blood poured out of the cut, down my arm and finally landed on the floor. I picked up the towel that was hanging on the towel rack and wrapped it around my arm. After a few minutes I got out of the shower and got dressed. Mum, dad and I went out for tea tonight it was a good meal. Well I'm heading off to bed now. Goodnight diary.

DEAR DIARY

FRIDAY 3RD MARCH 2012

Mum and I are going to be going camping with each other tomorrow and then we are having a shopping trip next weekend. I think mum is trying to hang with me and buy me things to see if she can get what dad is getting her for her birthday. No matter how hard she tries there is no way I am telling her what he is getting here. Mum said that we are going with one of her mates and her son so I hope that I we will get along with her son so I hope that we get along that way I have a true friend and not just my dairy.

I kind of can't wait till tomorrow and camping with mum because I plan on telling her about school and Christian you have to be silly to think that he isn't. a long day tomorrow so I have to go to bed and get a good night sleep who knows if we will get one tomorrow with me and mum putting up a tent.

DEAR DAIRY

MONDAY 5TH MARCH 2012

Today at school was shit, Christian was the person I was to make friends with, ha what a joke it was the most hardest and hurtful weekend I have ever been throw. Today was harder still he kept saying that I was trying to get into him , I was in the bathroom cleaning my face up from where the tears had flowing down my face at lunch. I was suddenly pulled into a toilet and the door was slam shut behind me, I turned to look at the face and seen that it was Kate. She screamed at me for a little while and I tried to tell her that I hadn't tried to get into boyfriend he wouldn't want me anyway. She begin to push me around the tiny little area that we were in and push my face down the toilet, thank-you mum for trying to get me to make new friends. I didn't end up telling her about the bulling because Christian been there I didn't want to start any trouble. I haven't cut since the other day and I don't think I will ever again I felt like crap when I had done it, and now I think I have an infection in my arm started. I am going to see someone tomorrow about changing from school to a course that way I don't have to go back there.

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