Absolution

I've been here before, Harold realizes. It's all the same: cloudy sky, chilly wind coming over the water, crowds pressing in. And Nathan standing off to one side, hair ruffled by the breeze, smiling at him.

"Harold! I knew you would come, my friend."

Harold moves toward him—but no, it's not the same after all. This time he's limping.

The discovery, the sudden feeling of hampered movement, catches him off guard and he stumbles. And then Nathan is there, grasping his arm, helping him through the crowd and over to the barrier. His eyes are gentle and concerned.

"I'm sorry, Harold," he says quietly. "About your injury."

Harold closes his eyes. "It wasn't your fault," he whispers. "It was mine. Not just my injury, but your—your—" He chokes on the word.

"No." Nathan's voice is still low, but strong. "It's not your fault either."

"I could have—"

"You didn't know. You were just trying to do what you thought best."

Harold opens his eyes and stares out over the water, gripping the metal post of the barrier in both hands. "I've helped to save several people now," he says tightly. "I even saved John Reese. But I—couldn't save you, Nathan. And when I remember that, I think—I can never make up for what I did." His voice breaks. "For what I—failed to do."

"Harold. Look at me."

Slowly, reluctantly, Harold turns. Nathan is looking at him with compassion, and something else—a serenity that Harold has never seen in him before.

"I'm glad you're doing this now. Really glad." He smiles again suddenly, his old mischievous smile. "The CIA agent with the arsenal—that's a nice touch. You always had to go the extra mile."

He chuckles, and unexpectedly Harold finds himself smiling shakily as well. "Yes, I thought you might like that part," he manages, removing his glasses and brushing at his eyes.

Nathan turns serious again. "I'm proud of you, Harold. " He waits a moment to let that sink in. "But listen—don't just make it about me, okay? It was never about me."

He grips Harold's arm once more.

"Do it because it's right. Do it to help those people who need you. That's all I ever wanted."

Harold wakes up with tears on his face, but a strange relief in his heart.