Prologue
The woman was standing with her back to the door and looking out the window, which was highly unusual for her. In fact, the woman couldn't remember the last time she had been able to have her back to anything. Shaking her head slightly to free it of thought she walked over to the counter with coffee on it. The woman smiled a slight smile as she noticed her mug was still sitting there. As she went to pick it up she noticed that her hands were shaking.
"Great, that's all I need," she thought to herself, "Rossi and Hotch will see right through this façade."
Before she had a chance to dwell on it more the door opened. Three men entered the room, and if the woman were honest she would admit that her stomach flipped for a second. Although it was quickly quashed by the big smile from Rossi, especially when he came over and took her hand. He could tell from he look in her eyes that hugging her would not be a good idea.
"How are you kiddo?" He asked squeezing her hand a little.
"I'm good," she responded. Her voice cracking slightly, as she looked up to Hotch and gave a slight nod.
"Thank you for coming in Agent Brooks, please have a seat." Hotch said.
As she went to sit down she had to smile to herself. Some things never change, all business, all the time.
"Agent Brooks, this is Mr. Dixon. He is a defense attorney, and the reason we asked you to come in."
There was no denying it now; her stomach was definitely not where it should be. In the back of her mind she knew this had to do with Mac, but still thinking and facing reality were two different things. She absently rubbed her left wrist, rubbing the scar there. It was one of the many she now had gracing her body. Her therapist noted that when she was particularly anxious she went to rub the scars she could reach. The ones on her wrist were most common, although when really nervous she went for the one on her neck.
"You okay Kathy?" Rossi whispered to her, having noticed her rubbing her wrist.
She nodded slightly, and swallowed. In a voice braver than she felt she looked at the third man that had come into the room.
"I'm guessing this has to do with Mac Santiago?"
"Yes, Ms. Brooks." The third man, Mr. Dixon replied.
"It's Agent Brooks, not Ms., and after all this time, what does Mac want with me?"
"Ahh, yes, sorry. The reason I am here is to make sure this offer is made to you." Mr. Dixon said, looking pointedly at Hotch and Rossi. "My client would like to make a deal. He is willing to give up the names and locations of the other 33 victims he killed in exchange for the death penalty off the table, as well as some other amenities."
Kathy raised an eyebrow and looked at Mr. Dixon. "What does that have to do with me? It's been almost a year since . . ." She inhaled deeply, but did not finish.
Mr. Dixon nodded and looked at her.
"My client will only tell one person the names and locations, and that one person
Is . . ."
Before he could finish her head quickly shot in the air, "me? He only wants to talk to me?"
"Yes. That is his offer. He will give you the names and locations, but only you."
"You don't have to take the deal Agent Brooks. It would be completely understandable if you didn't." Hotch said. His voice was firm, and hard.
She looked over at him and realized it was also angry. The reason for her being her was obviously not his choice. He didn't want her to come face to face with Mac anymore than she did.
"Do you want to take a minute to think about this?" Rossi asked, gently grabbing her hand.
She hadn't realized that her other hand was going for her neck. She didn't think she could speak, and worried if she opened her mouth she might scream.
"Mr. Dixon would you excuse us please?" Rossi asked in a pleasant but firm tone.
"Of course. Please remember though, the stipulation if Agent Brooks doesn't take this deal."
"Of course." Rossi said, this time standing with Mr. Dixon. Anger coursing through him, this little weasel of a lawyer was going to make Kathy do this, and it broke his heart.
Mr. Dixon quietly left the room. Before the door was closed behind him Kathy was on her feet, and walking over to the window. She was trying to catch her breath, but it just didn't seem to want to cooperate. She knew her hand was rubbing at her neck and she didn't care. The thought of seeing Mac again had her entire body shaking. She felt like she could feel him in the room. Smell him in the air, hear his laughter, and worse feel his touch on her body. She wrapped her arms around herself and slowly turned around.
"What's the stipulation?" She asked, her voice barely audible.
"He's threatening to tell the press that we refused to make a deal. That we could have helped those 33 families put their daughters to rest and we didn't." Hotch said.
She nodded and turned towards the window again. "Of course he'd have a back-up she thought to herself."
"Kathy you don't have to do this. We can handle the press. No-one would blame you for not wanting to do this."
She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes as she turned around to face the two men she considered family.
"I'd blame me." She shook her head, and then closing her eyes and stretching her neck. She finally looked them both in the eyes.
"No, I have to do this. I owe it to them." Her voice cracked a little, and Rossi stepped forward but she put her hand up to stop him. "I am the only one to survive that cave. I have to do this." Her voice sounding much stronger than she thought it would.
"You know he's going to make this hard on you, he's going to . . ." Hotch said.
She smiled as she interrupted him.
"He's going to fuck with my head. He's going to make me relive everything that happened. He's going to try and break me. I know exactly what he's going to do." She went over to Hotch and Rossi, and took Rossi's hand. "I know exactly what he's going to do, he's going to want to finish the game. But, I have a therapist, and that's what she's for." Again she smiled but it did not reach her eyes. "Time to go to Utah."
"For the record, you are not going alone. This team is your family, and we fought that monster once for you, he won't get you again." Rossi said squeezing her hand.
"I wouldn't expect it any other way." She said.
Hotch nodded and stepped out to get Mr. Dixon. He wished that she had said no, but knew she couldn't, wouldn't. He was sending his still healing agent into the lion's den, alone, and she barely came out alive last time. Unfortunately, he knew he didn't have a choice.