My name is Harry Potter. I am ten years, ten months, and five days old. I can't do hours and minutes, or rising or moon sign, as I don't know what time I was born - or where, either, for that matter, although I do know it wasn't in a hospital.

What I do know is that my parents died in a car crash, and that my dad was probably drunk, when I was not quite two years old, and some of my dad's friends dropped me off on my aunt's and uncle's doorstep in the middle of the night with nothing but a note and not even having been seen by a doctor afterwards. My aunt isn't the world's kindest person, and I do know to take her criticisms with a whole shaker full of salt, but really, what kind of people do that? And when my aunt and uncle took me to the doctor, they found out that I didn't have a birth certificate or any record of even existing, and so obviously no infant shots either. My aunt and uncle are still mad about that, and having to do all that paperwork on top of dealing with the fact that those weirdos my dad hung out with got my mom killed.

My mother's name was Lily. I know that she was beautiful, smart, and couldn't carry a tune in a bucket, and that she was Aunt Petunia's little sister. I also know that she got a scholarship to some special school that Aunt Petunia didn't get to go to, and that she met my father there and married him right after finishing there.

All I know about my dad is that I look just like him, except that I have Mum's eyes, and that he was an arrogant bast... Erm, berk. That's almost word for word what my aunt and uncle say about him. Oh yeah, and I know he just about ruined my aunt and uncle's wedding because he thought he was really funny.

This isn't stuff Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon told me, by the way. I listen a lot, especially when they toast the New Year, as AP gets really talkative when she's had a few.

Aunt Petunia complains a lot. That's kind of who she is. If she didn't feel hard done by, I think she wouldn't know what to do with herself. All the same, I've been listening to her complain about people and things all my life, I definitely know how to work out which complaints are actually compliments, and my dad really does sound like a piece of work. The only good thing AP says about me on purpose is that at least I've learned good manners some of the time, unlike my (worthless degenerate) father.

Oh yeah, and this is funny, I once overheard AP refer to both my parents as being "too pretty for their own good". Since I look just like my dad, I'd be good looking too if I had decent clothes. I think that's a riot, actually. She doesn't know I heard that, so she doesn't know that every time she says I look just like him (and you really need to get the proper sneer behind that), that she's actually giving me a compliment.

My aunt was really really jealous of my mom. I don't know if my grandparents really worshipped the ground she walked on or if she just thinks they did, but I figure, the way she treats me & Dudley is her revenge. Dudley is my cousin, their son, and he can do no wrong, where I can do no right. He's a bullying spoiled lardball and sometimes I'm surprised he hasn't killed or maimed me yet. Not for lack of trying, certainly.

Yeah, my life kind of sucks. When I was little, I used to dream of someone rescuing me from here, but I figured out a long time ago that I need to rescue myself. Come this fall, I'm halfway there, too. Dudley's off to Smeltings, which is UV's old school, and I'm off to Stonewall, the local school. Aunt & Uncle already know his school is much more posh than mine, so I can stop worrying about keeping my grades down. And Dudley won't be there to scare away everyone I might try to make friends with, and they take kids from all over Little, Less, and Greater Whinging, so all the kids won't already know to keep away from me. I'm still going to be wearing awful clothes, but I've been teaching myself to sew, so hopefully I can fix that, at least a little.

My plan is, to tailor my uniforms so I only look scruffy rather than completely disreputable and slowly bring my grades up. Still thinking about that last, though. If my excuse for better grades is that they grade easier at Stonewall because we're all so hopeless, would it make more sense for me to get good grades right out of the gate? But then, the teachers will know that's rubbish, so if my grades change quickly, they could decide I was cheating. Oh well, I still have three months to think about it.

That's why I've started keeping this journal, by the way. To sound out my thoughts and organize them, keep track of what I know and how my plans are going. I'm keeping it under my mattress, so I'm not too worried about anyone seeing. Nobody but me ever comes in here.

6 June 1991

It's really frustrating not knowing what time I was born. There are some really in-depth books on astrology at the library and I'm having a grand time reading them. I know it's rubbish, really, but it's something to do and it has lots of lovely fussy details to mess with. And one, I'm never going to be graded on it, so I can study as much as I like, two, it's not a subject anybody I know is at all interested in, so there's not much risk of me letting anything slip like there would be if I were reading up on football or the like, and three, I know AP and UV would, well, "disapprove" is too mild a word. UV'd probably have a stroke on the spot. Be kinda funny to watch if I didn't have to worry about him taking my head off. (He almost never hits me, but I'm pretty good at reading him and not pushing at the wrong time.)

Anyway, what I do know is that I'm a Leo (popular astrology has arrogance strongly associated with that sign; that's way too simplistic, of course, but it is good to know to watch out for it, especially considering heredity), with a lot of planets in water signs. This means I'm a great leader (ha ha) and very emotionally driven. The first is funny. The second is way too true. I don't like mucking about with feelings, but things just work a lot better when I do. Blah. It's not at all sensible, but it's true, so I'm stuck with it.

Venus is prominent in my chart, so I'm a people-pleaser. No. Really? It's not really my aunt and uncle's fault, it's really the planets?

The main thrust of my chart is nobility, leadership, heroism, love and other strong emotions, willpower, compassion, and modesty. I guess that last must be right, as I think the rest is bollocks. I think I'll do Dudley's chart next, to see what wonderful qualities he supposedly has.

I complain too much. I'm going to turn into Aunt Petunia if I don't watch out. It's hard to see the bright side though. Most of the time I want to disappear or punch something. But, today's a gardening day, and I actually rather enjoy gardening, so that's something. And tomorrow AP and Dudley need to do a bunch of school shopping and paperwork and stuff, so I get to spend the afternoon at the library. (AP thinks I'm at Mrs. Figg's house, but Mrs. Figg and I have had an agreement for a while. I give her a hand with litter boxes and brush Tango for her, and she lets me hang out at the library and sometimes even points me out some interesting books.)

Tango is one of her tomcats, by the way. He's huge and for some reason I'm the only one who can brush him. Piers Polkiss (one of Dudley's unprintable friends) is terrified of him.

Anyway, it's time to fix breakfast, so I'll write more later.