I'm posting this because I felt like writing something and didn't feel like updating anything from my other persona. This story is dedicated to an online friend from Finland who has been feeling a bit down lately...whether he will ever see this or not, I do not know, but he will understand if he ever does. Special *hugs* to my lovely Badger friend!

Warning: There is no sex in this. It is not even implied. But it does contain MPreg. Confused? Yeah, me too!

Edited to Add: There is no sex in thischapter. However, please expect there to be at some point. If you don't like it (male/male sex), then I thank you kindly for visiting, but please leave without raising a stink (i.e. flaming). And, if that's what you're here for...the future smut...then welcome! *grin*

Draco Malfoy's After-midnight Maelstrom
Sunday, 15 July 2007

~ o ~

From a dead sleep, Draco Malfoy woke abruptly and immediately felt quite confused. For a moment he didn't know where he was or what was happening...or why he'd been yanked from such blissful oblivion and thrust into chaos.

And then he heard and recognized the wailing squall of a newborn—his newborn!

Well, newborn-ish. His daughter, Aria Iris Malfoy, was nearly three months old now, but things had been difficult, to say the least.

Sighing, the exhausted man rolled from bed and reached for his discarded nightshirt, then hurried for his daughter's room. He wanted to get there quickly, before his other children heard their sister's cries and woke as well, demanding his attention.

Flipping on the hall light, then dialing it down so the light wasn't glaring down at him, the blond man moved into his tiny daughter's bedroom and plucked her from her cot. She was wet, of course, so he made quick work of her nappies, then held her close, cooing to her as they headed for the kitchen.

"Sissy okay, Daddy?" one of his sons asked as soon as he'd set foot on the stairs.

"Yes, Caelum, she's fine. Just wet and hungry," Draco explained. "It's late. You should return to your bed."

"But I'm hungry too," the child whined, following his father instead of going back to bed as had been suggested.

Sighing, Draco looked down at his eldest child. Caelum was seven...and as precocious as a child could be; it was pretty much useless to argue with the child. "That's absolutely not true, Caelum, but...very well. You can help me with Aria. She's extra angry tonight, I think. Then you can have some warm milk. Then bed!"

Caelum grinned. "All right. I'll get her bottle," he said as he rushed forward to help his father.

Draco's oldest child was extremely helpful. Caelum never seemed to tire of his siblings or care that there were so many of them—and for that Draco would be eternally grateful.

But things didn't go very smoothly on this night. As soon as Draco had stuffed the bottle's nipple into his daughter's small sucking mouth, he heard a thud and more cries coming from upstairs.

"Shite!"

"Bad word, Daddy," Caelum reminded him.

"I know. Sorry. Would you go check on the twins for daddy?" Draco asked—since it sounded like at least one of them had rolled out of bed. This was a nightly adventure that was never much more than a few tears of fright.

Caelum nodded and hurried off.

But the crying didn't stop. Thinking something might be seriously wrong, the blond secured his daughter in her carrier and hurried from the room. After only one step from the room, his daughter was yowling again too—angry that her sustenance had been withdrawn and that she was no longer in her father's warm arms.

"Daddy, Orion fell out of bed again," Caelum informed him as soon as he'd entered and scooped up the four-year-old who was sobbing—which was immediately chorused by the boy's twin.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

"Shut those brats up!" came a muffled scream through the wall Draco shared with a neighbor—who was not at all child-friendly.

"Are we brats, Daddy?" asked Caelum.

"Of course not," Draco responded as he physically checked his crying son for injuries. Orion appeared to only be startled, but that didn't prevent him from wailing loudly.

RING, RING!

RING, RING!

RING, RING!

Caelum was on his feet immediately. "I'll get it, Daddy!"

"No. Just ignore...it," the blond objected, but it was no use, his eldest child had already fled the room.

"Damn it!" Draco cursed.

"B-bad. W-word. Da-da," the twin Draco was holding scolded between hiccups.

At this, Draco couldn't help but laugh. Curling an arm around each boy, he scooped them up and carried them downstairs—he needed to get back to his screaming baby—and he prayed the one child that was still sleeping would remain that way.

"It was the mean lady next door, Daddy," Caelum reported to him as he entered the kitchen. "She said she's calling the police."

Rolling his eyes—because the bitch had been threatening to do that for about two months now—Draco went to the fridge to get his boys something to drink.

"Don't worry about her, Caelum...she's just angry that we woke her up again."

"I don't know. She used really bad words."

Frowning, Draco quickly warmed some milk for his boys, then picked up his daughter and settled himself down in a chair to feed her. "I'll talk to her."

"She said not to bother with your e'cuses...to tell them to the officer when he gets here."

"Brilliant!"

Sleepily, Draco fed his daughter and watched his sons quietly drink their milk. Though they exhausted him, he adored each of them.

KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK!

"I think it's the cops, Daddy," Caelum said.

Frowning again, Draco wearily got up. "Might be. Here, take your sister, Cael."

Caelum moved into his father's chair and held out his arms to take his sister...and settling her there, Draco left the room.

KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK!

"All right, already! I'm COMING!" Draco bellowed. Exasperated, from all the crying, banging, shouting, ringing, and now knocking, Draco yanked the door open. "WHAT?!"

But then his eyes bugged out...and he immediately slammed the door shut.

"Go away, Potter!"

"Malfoy?" came the shocked voice of Harry Potter.

"Yes, Potter, it's me. Go away!"

"I can't do that, Malfoy. A few of your neighbors called the police. Claimed there might be child abuse going on here."

"I assure you, I am not abusing my children."

"You have children?"

"Obviously I do...I just said I did," Draco snapped. Then, feeling a sudden wave of nausea hit him, Draco rested his forehead on the door and swallowed a few times. Oh no! No, no, no, this cannot be happening! the blond thought as tears filled his eyes. "Go away, Potter. Please, just go away," he groaned.

"Malfoy? Are you okay? Open the door."

"I'm...fine, Potter. Please...just go."

"No can do. I'm here on official business. Open the door," Draco's former classmate said, giving the door a firm thump!

And then a sharp pain in his abdomen brought the blond to his knees. "FUCK! Not again!"

"Malfoy," Potter said warningly. "Don't make me blast the door open. I don't want to, but I will if you don't open up."

At this point it didn't matter anymore. Draco knew it was too late to protect himself. He thought living among Muggles, in a place far away from other wizards, would be enough, but apparently it wasn't. And so he gathered himself, rose to his feet, and open the door, then turned and went to a small couch, flinging himself down upon it when he got there.

~ o ~

Pushing Draco Malfoy's front door open enough to enter, Harry stepped over the threshold and closed the door, then followed the blond man into his lounge. It was a decent sized room, more a home office than a lounge, Harry realized once his eyes adjusted to the low lighting, and connected to a formal dining room.

"All right, Malfoy. What's going on here?" Harry asked as he inched himself further into the room. "We received no less than three calls that the children at this residence have been screaming all night...one lady even insisted that they were being mistreated."

"Pfft!" Draco scoffed. "That is simply untrue...as you can plainly hear, Potter. My children were crying, yes...but not because they were being harmed."

The dark-haired man frowned. "Where are your children?"

Draco snorted. "Four of them are in the kitchen."

This caused Harry to blink with surprise. "At this hour?"

"My daughter required her 2:00am feeding, so, yes, the entire household is up. Well, most of us. One of my boys is still asleep. Thank Merlin! And one of my sons rolled out of bed. He's fine though, I assure you."

"I see."

"Daddy?" came a child's voice from the kitchen doorway. "Aria's fussing. I think she likes it better when you feed her."

"Right. Bring her to me, Cael," the blond man instructed.

The boy, whose tousled hair was just as blond as his father's, disappeared for a second, then quickly reappeared holding a baby...with two other blond boys in tow.

"Hello Sir," the tallest of the three boys said after handing off his sister. "I'm Caelum Vincentius Malfoy."

At this Harry smiled and knelt down beside the child. "Well, hello there, Caelum. I'm Officer Potter. And who might these two be?"

"They're my brothers, Orion and Corvus. They're 'dentical twins."

"I can see that. It's nice to meet you boys."

The twins smiled shyly, then stuffed thumbs in their mouths.

"And that's our sister, Aria," Caelum continued. "She's new, but she's getting big. Daddy says the more she grows the less she'll scream at night."

"Hmm. I've heard that's true," Harry said, sending a grin over at his school-day rival.

"You can't meet Scorpi though...he's sleeping," the seven-year-old continued—then held a finger up to his mouth and said, "Shhh!"

Copying the boy, Harry held a finger up to his own mouth. "Shhh."

"Do you have a gun?" Caelum then whispered. "My daddy says guns are dangerous."

Chuckling, Harry glanced over at Draco, then back at the boy. "No, I don't and...your daddy is right, guns are extremely dangerous."

"Do you have a—"

"All right, Caelum," Draco interrupted, "that's enough. Take your brothers upstairs. I'll be up straight away."

"Yes, Daddy. Nice to meet you, Officer Potter. Please don't 'rrest our daddy. It's not his fault that we're loud."

This made Harry chuckle again. "Don't worry, Caelum, I'm not going to arrest your dad," he promised, then smiled as he watched the three grinning blond boys leave the room. After they were gone, Harry looked at their father again. Draco had tilted his head back against the sofa, his eyes closed again, but was still managing to hold a bottle to his infant's mouth.

"They are adorable, Malfoy...I'll give you that."

"Of course they are, Potter, they're mine!"

Snorting, Harry rolled his eyes. "Haven't lost your arrogance at all, have you?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Harry watched as the blond man shifted to accommodate his fussing daughter, waiting for the man to look up at him again. When he did, Harry spoke again. "So, you have four children."

"Five...and one on the way actually."

Harry's brows shot up. "Been busy, have you?"

Draco clenched his jaw, obviously fighting to keep a sarcastic remark from flying out of his mouth.

"That's quite a handful," the dark-haired man continued. "Where's your wife?"

Huffing, Draco shook his head. "At this point, I wish I had one."

"Excuse me?"

"I'm gay, Potter...I have no wife!"

Harry blinked. "Oh. Well, if that's the case...what the hell is going on here?"

"Ever heard of male pregnancy, Potter?"

"Well yes, I've read about it some." And he had. It was something he was seriously considering, since he too was gay and wanted children in his future. "So, does that mean you have a husband instead?"

"If only it were that easy. Why the fuck did it have to be you?!" Draco all but whined.

"Why did what have to be me?" Harry asked, confused.

"Why are you prancing around Muggle London in copper uniform? I thought you were an Auror."

"Hmm. I was. But Kingsley expected too much of me...wanted me to become the Ministry's next poster boy...or something. I couldn't take it anymore. Had to get out! But I still wanted to go into law enforcement. You always did say I had a hero complex."

Draco snorted.

"So, this seemed like the way to go," Harry finished with a quick gesture down at his attire. "Still get to chase the bad guys, but don't have to deal with the Ministry."

"Interesting." Looking down at his daughter—who was now sleeping—the blond smiled briefly.

"So, no child abuse going on here then?" Harry persisted.

Shaking his head, Draco closed his eyes and leaned back onto the sofa again. "Obviously not."

Shifting on his feet, Harry studied the exhausted-looking man sitting in front of him. "Just out of curiosity, why don't you just...you know, use magic to block the noise of crying children? A well-placed spell or two does wonders."

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Draco sighed, then opened his eyes. "I can't, Potter. I've got...an issue with magic. Why do you think I'm living here in Muggle London?"

"An issue? What sort of issue?

"The sort that lands me pregnant if I'm around it!" the blond growled after glaring at the other man. "More specifically, wizards."

"Wait. What?"

"You are...just as ineloquent as you ever were, Potter," Draco accused, clearly unsure whether he should be irritated with the dark-haired man or amused by him.

"Excuse me for not understanding, Malfoy, but you're not really explaining the situation. I'm here on several 999 calls, so if you'd kindly tell me what's happened, I'll be on my way."

"There's nothing to tell really. I had crying children and my neighbors didn't take it kindly at 2:00am. And I can't really do magic to prevent the noise from disturbing them. Simple as that."

Harry nodded. "All right. I got that. Do you want to explain why you have so many children and don't have any help? Where are your parents?"

"Well, not that it's any of your business, Potter, but...apparently I'm afflicted with a rare condition where the magic of other wizards gets me up the duff. First there was Goyle, then—"

"You had sex with Gregory Goyle?" Harry asked, his nose wrinkled with disgust.

"NO! I most certainly did not!" Draco snapped. "It was his magic. I spent a lot of time with him after our trials. He was...is...mentally impaired and I... Never mind! I spent time with him...comforting him...in a non-sexual way...and I ended up pregnant. It's a magic thing."

"I see."

Draco frowned. "I don't think that you do."

"No, I've heard of this."

"Granger?"

Harry nodded.

"Figures!"

"It's quite interesting."

"Not really!" Draco snapped. "I can't even be around my own father, for fear that his magic will impregnate me. And my mother won't visit, because she thinks her magic will either hurt me or that she'll carry father's magic with her and that his will. I'm a pariah!"

"So, how is it that you have five children then. Most of the time wizards remove themselves from society when this happens."

Draco's brows shot up. "I did that, idiot!" the blond snapped. "But the delivery guy who brought my groceries...out to my very secluded house in the country...must have been magical in some way and I ended up knocked up. Again! That's how I got my sweet Aria here. I'm not sure about the twins...I swear I was careful, but...obviously not! Scorpius, on the other hand, was a normal, non-magical birth. After doing some research, Mother and Father suggested that, if I were to marry, the magical issue might dissipate over time...if I could create a bond with a witch. I tried, but...it didn't work and Astoria left me when I became pregnant with Aria."

Harry frowned. Scorpius was the only one of Draco's children that he'd not seen and he was curious—about whether the child looked as much like his father as the others did. But he tried to focus. "She just left her son with you?"

"She left my son with me, Potter," Draco corrected.

"Well...yes, but...hers too."

Draco shook his head. "Not anymore. She was a nice girl, but she grew into quite the cold woman, Potter...never would have been a good mother any of my children. Not sure why I chose her in the first place. I guess I just hoped, but..." He shrugged. "Anyway, this brings us to my current issue."

"And what's that, Malfoy?"

"Well, seeing as you're the only wizard I've been in contact with in months, I need to inform you that I'm expecting."

Harry frowned. "Expecting what?"

"A baby, you moron!" Draco snapped. "Seeing you at my front door...feeling your magic...you did me in, you git! Thanks a fucking lot!"

Harry's eyes widened. "Me?"

Draco nodded...and watched as Harry's knees buckled and he dropped onto the sofa.

"But...we don't even like each other."

Draco snorted. "Our magicks don't seem to give flying fuck, Potter. Besides, it's not like you have to stick around...Merlin knows I can do this myself."

"What?! No. I'm not leaving him...or her. Or you. I don't walk away from responsibilities, Malfoy."

"Of course you don't! You're such a Gryffindor," Draco complained. "Really though, it's not like you fucked me and actually got me pregnant, Potter...it's a magical essence pregnancy, nothing more."

"All male pregnancies are magical, Malfoy."

"Either way, you're free to leave and not look back."

"Like hell I will!" Harry growled. "We might not have had sex, but you have my baby in there and I will be a part of his or her life!"

It was Draco's turn to blink in surprise—then he shook his head. "Actually, Potter, the child will be one hundred percent mine...if you'll just leave. Your magic helped put this child here," he said, his hand automatically going to his stomach, "but if you're not around during the pregnancy or afterwards, then the child's DNA will shift and, discarding all the Potter parts, will become solely mine. Like I said, you are free to go."

"Nice try. I'm not leaving."

For a moment, Draco just glared—then he shrugged. "Fine then. Suit yourself, Potter. Welcome to fatherhood!"