424-Nullmetal Alchemist is not an alternate universe and Al has never been there.
Now you know where most of his jokes come from.
425-Roy, Havoc, and several other members of the male military staff never tried to sympathize with Hawkeye by dressing up as girls.
Seeing all of them dress in frilly dresses with makeup and jewelry (it was at a ball) made Hawkeye nearly pass out due to lack of oxygen in her laughing fit.
And when photos of said event reached Olivier her 'melodious' laughter made several soldiers think that the apocalypse was imminent.
426-Edward Elric was never confirmed as a legal midget.
Roy wrote up the fake document…and nearly caused for the twelve year old to have a coronary.
He later felt so sorry that he ceremonious bought him a 'Get Better' teddy bear.
427- Winry does not have a CPU like brain.
"Winry are you listening?"
"I'm listening Ed, but it just take me a little longer to process all that stupidity at once without causing a system error."
428- Amestris never experienced a Sharknado.
The Curtis family did enjoy all the free sushi. And Roy's impromptu 'fish fry' left him the man of the hour in East City.
…
After they cleaned up of course.
429- Roy never fought the Kraken.
"WHAT THE HELL! WHAT IS THIS? IT'S LIKE FROM ONE OF THOSE XINGESE DIRTY MAGAZINES!" Roy screamed as he did everything in his power to row a canoe across the Central River. Behind the alchemist and monster squid was Ling with a harpoon and the ideas of fresh takoyaki yelling "GET IN MAH BELLY!"
430- Ed is not scared of Otaku.
"You look just like the princely bishojo described in my light novel!" the random girl cried out as she shoved a Xingese novel at Ed, effectively interrupting his fight with Scar. "So are you the pitcher or the catcher in your relationship?"
"OTAKU!" Ed shrieked.
Riza stared.
"Otaku?" Scar repeated curiously.
"I never seen or met one." Al mused.
"SAVE ME PLEASE!" Ed screamed as he used Roy like a human shield.
"Oh, so you're the catcher and he's your pitcher?"
Ed turned so red that the rain turned to steam as it hit him, and he fainted dead away, practically cracking open his head on the road.
Roy blinked. "Pitcher; why are we talking baseball?"
"If you don't know never mind." Hughes and Fuery deadpanned.
431- The Fifth Laboratory never brought dinosaurs back to life and accidentally set them loose in Central.
"WHOSE IDEA WAS IT TO BRING BACK A T-REX?" Ed screamed as he, Scar and Al ran for their lives down an alley and were surprisingly rescued by Envy and dragged down into the sewers in time for Gluttony to have a buffet.
"T-Rex! Yummy!"
"…So this is how you guys keep him fed?" Al gasped.
"Yup…"
"Terrifying." Scar deadpanned.
432- There was never a real life Mario Cart race in Amestris.
Upon seeing several of their colleagues racing around Central in wacky stylized cars Miles and Olivier did an about face and headed back up North.
…
After they took pictures of everyone in the six man/homunculus pile up and Ed's crazy victory by driving over the rooftops of Central Command.
433- There was never a Food Fight in Eastern Command.
Despite his 'pleas of innocence' everyone knew that Ed was the one to start the fight by launching the open carton of milk at Roy.
Although…no one knew who threw a large tray of Monday Mystery meat at Havoc or why Hayate took one sniff and hid up Roy's desk for the rest of the day.
434- The Armstrong siblings never attended Ouran Academy.
Not willingly on Olivier's behalf though. All that pink scared her and she immediately filed for a transfer within a week to some school in a country called Sinnoh.
435- In his team Roy is not 'Daddy' and Riza is not 'Mommy'
No matter what that weird girl Renge who claims to be engaged to Kyouya says about their team dynamics.
Don't listen to her friend Tamaki either.
436- Ed never tried to use the Dragonballs in order to bring back Al's body.
That was plan B.
However Shenron had recently lost a bet to Truth so it was invalid.
437- Likewise Ed never fought a guy named Vegeta.
The guy first thought Ed and Al were 'bastard' sayians…then called Ed short…
Everyone claims that it was those events that caused Ed to go 'Super Sayian'
438- Ed never studied with a boy only known as L.
It was scary how those two were polar opposites got along so well.
But they did argue about milk.
439- Ed never got a hold of a Death Note.
He spotted it lying in the grass outside a school, but thought it was bogus and walked off.
440- Roy and Riza never had to pretend to be a newlywed couple on a covert mission.
Best month long mission in Roy's life…and Riza's.
441- Edward Elric is not the previous life of L.
"…"
"Otakus are so weird.." Ed muttered as he punched out the medium hired to find a missing five year old.
"At least she didn't call you short."
442- Trisha Elric was not a witch.
.Ed and Al could never understand why their mother had kept a stick hidden under the house's floor boards.
At least not until Furey explained to them that it was a magic wand and proved it by letting Ed use a simple spell with it to turn Roy's hair highlighter pink.
443- Ed never underwent ninja training.
Izumi is a ninja.
Therefore your argument is invalid.
444- Intelligence Agent Katherine King aka the Time-Illusion Alchemist did not risk life and limb to gather supporting information about all these myths and rumors.
Katherine gasped as she lay down. After all the sweat and blood, and death threats from various military soldiers and sleepless nights she was finally done with her last secret mission left to her by Hughes.
"I hope you're happy wherever you are you bastard." She muttered as she dozed off. She then neglected to see a blue police box land in her yard, the Doctor jump out and copy all her files then leave.
"Thanks for all this Captain Katherine." Hughes laughed as he read the files and looked at the files.
Due to an oversight I missed 190-199 so I added them to Ch. 10 thank you for the reviewer who pointed it out.
SPECIAL THANKS to EVERYONE who REVIEWED AND MADE SUGGESTIONS.
THANK YOU AND I HOPED THAT EVERYONE LAUGHED AT LEAST ONCE.