It was a hot day when a couple of fishermen found a strange little boy with a straw hat washed up on the beach.

"Hey Yonu, look! It's a kid!" said the first fisherman.

"Oh my God Yuno I see him! Right, we have to help him!" said Yonu. Together they rushed over to where they kid was laying.

He was on his back with a straw hat much too big for him was stuck on his head. He couldn't have been older than 6 or 7 years old.

"Hey, grab him and we'll pull him further up the beach Yonu!"

"You're so smart Yuno! Let's help this little gaki."

They each grabbed one of his arms and went to pull him up the beach. To their complete shock the kid's arms stretched many times their normal length when they tried to pull him.

Both of their jaws dropped to the ground when they saw this and their eyes flew about six inches out of their eye sockets.

"What—WHAT IS THIS?!" they both cried in unison.

00000

Konohagakure

In front of the Third sat the strange little boy that had been found on the coast two days prior. Not that the ninja village would normally take any interest in that but against all odds it seemed this little boy had a previously unknown kekkei genkai.

The boy just looked straight ahead at him with his arms folded, wearing some baggy clothes and a straw hat too big for him on his head. He had a scar under one eye and the Hokage wondered how he got it. There was something odd about the look on the boy's eyes. He had an empty, vacant look. Not like someone traumatized or under some kind of influence. It was more the vacant look one would expect to see in farm animals – the kind of look they had because there really wasn't much going on upstairs.

The Third looked over and addressed the medic who had brought the boy over from the hospital. "So, how is he? What was he able to tell you?"

The medic looked a little uncomfortable. "Well aside from dehydration and a little sunburn he's right as you can expect. There is a lot of memory loss, so we suspect he must have had quite the blow to the head. That might explain his… peculiarities. Mostly he just remembers his name and… one other thing."

This made the Third curious, so he decided he would talk to the boy and see what he remembered himself. "Thank you, let me talk to the boy now" he said to the medic who nodded.

The little boy sat still with the same wide eyed blank expression on his face. And why were his eyes so round? Overall it was all kind of creepy.

"What's your name son?" asked the Hokage.

"I'm Luffy" answered the little boy.

The Third nodded. "Good good. Now can you tell me where you're from Luffy?"

The boy just looked at him blankly for a few moments. Just when the Hokage thought the boy hadn't heard him the boy started to squint and scrunch his face like he was thinking really hard.

Well that was suddenly a delayed reaction thought the Hokage. At least the boy was giving it some serious thought.

The Hokage let him continue to scrunch and think for a few minutes. Eventually it looked like he had figured something out because his face relaxed and he turned back to the Hokage with a smile.

"Well?" asked the Hokage.

"I'm Luffy!" The little boy said.

The Hokage promptly fell out of his chair.

"What was all that time you spent thinking? You already told me your name!" said the Hokage pulling himself back in his chair.

"Well I am. I'm Luffy!" said the boy again.

"Err well yes… why don't we move on to something else shall we? Do you know how come you're able to stretch your limbs the way you do?" asked the Hokage "It truly is a remarkable ability my boy."

"Why? Can't everyone do it?" Luffy asked with a tilt of his head.

The Hokage's eyebrow twitched. What is wrong with this kid? Maybe the medics were wrong and he does have brain damage.

"No Luffy, people most definitely do not stretch their limbs like a piece of rubber."

"Why not? It's really fun. Look" said Luffy.

To the Hokage's awe and horror Luffy grabbed his head and lifted it up stretching his neck. Then he proceeded to turn his head around three or four times tightening his neck like a corkscrew. Then he let go of his head and it spun around really fast until it snapped back in to place.

"Haha! That's really fun Ojiisan. Give me a few minutes to full my mouth up with spit and then I can spray it like a firehouse all around the room. You should try it too!" said an enthusiastic Luffy.

The Hokage had to resist the urge to facepalm. "Other people can't stretch like you do Luffy. And I would appreciate it if you didn't spit all over my office."

When the Third looked up at Luffy he was already twisting his head around again and had his cheeks full of spit.

"STOP THAT!" shouted the Hokage with sudden unexplainable pointy teeth.

After he had gotten the boy to settle down and (thankfully) swallow his spit the Hokage wasn't sure he could take much more of this interview. He moved to wrap things up.

"So Luffy," said the Hokage, "do you remember anything other than your name?" asked the Hokage tiredly, not really expecting a positive answer.

To his surprise Luffy nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah, there's something real important that I remember." Said Luffy for once with a serious look on his face.

He was about to find out a piece of the puzzle with this strange little boy. The Hokage couldn't help it he leaned forward in anticipation for what they boy had to say. "What? What is it you remember that's so important Luffy?"

The boy broke out in a stupidly big grin. "I'm going to be the King of all Pirates!"

The Hokage's desk broke in half, such was the force with which slammed his forehead into the shiny wooden surface.

00000

The boy Luffy was a complete mystery. No one knew where he came from or where his Kekkei Genkai originated. There was also the question of whatever was wrong with him. He had amnesia sure that much was obvious to everyone. But he was so peculiar. Half the medical staff thought it was an undetectable brain trauma that explained the amnesia and the strange behavior. The other half just thought he was a complete idiot/dumbass/someone with bovine level IQ.

Either way brain injury/dumbassery not withstanding, it was decided that his unique ability was simply too good to be allowed to go to waste. Thus Luffy was set up with a tiny apartment, a small stipend and was enrolled in the ninja academy. When Iruka came to his new apartment to tell him he would be going to ninja school, the first question that he asked floored the Chunnin.

"What's a ninja?"

When he picked himself off the floor the ninja squinted at the boy furiously. "You saying you don't know what a ninja is Luffy?"

"Yup. I don't have any idea" said the boy with one of his big smiles.

Ok then… "Do you know what a police officer is?" asked Iruka, deciding to do a little test.

"Yeah. They catch bad guys."

"Do you know what a fireman is?"

"Yup."

"Do you know what a bandit is?"

"Yup."

"Do you know what a dentist is?"

"Yup. A sick sadist."

"That's not really… you know never mind you're actually right on that one. Do you know what a soldier is?"

"Yup."

"So… do you know what a ninja is?"

"No idea" he said with a laugh. Iruka's eyebrow twitched. How could he not know what a ninja is? And did he have to be so damn happy about it?

I guess it must be some weird quirk of his amnesia Iruka figured.

"Ok…" began Iruka, thinking how he was going to explain this in simple terms, "A ninja is kind of like a soldier. Except they are much stronger, a lot more sneaky, and the only work for the village and Lord Hokage. Got it?"

The boy seemed to ponder this for a few minutes with his hand on his chin. "Say," Luffy asked, "I'm going to need Nakama if I'm going to be the Pirate King. Are there going to be lots of strong people in this ninja thing? Maybe someone who can cook, and a musician and stuff."

Iruka's eyebrows shot up in incredulity. He wants his Nakama to be really strong but also have some mundane civilian job? I don't know what this kid's deal is… but he can't just be this slow. It has to be brain damage. Is he actually going to be able to cut is as a ninja?

Hokage's orders were absolute however. Iruka would just pay along and hope things worked out.

"Yes Luffy, in the ninja academy but especially once you graduate and become a real ninja you'll make lots of Nakama. In fact most people when they get assigned into a team help each other get stronger and become Nakama for life." The Chunnin said to the young boy.

"And ninja are strong right?" asked Luffy with a concentrated frown on his face.

Didn't we just go over this a minute ago? Thought Iruka to himself.

With patience and a slightly forced smile he replied, "Yes Luffy. Ninja are super strong. Our village, Konoha is known for having the strongest ninja and we care the most about making strong bonds with our Nakama. What do you say Luffy, are you ready to become a ninja?"

Luffy seemed to think about it for a minute, then broke out into a huge grin, "Ha ha, you bet! Strong people, strong Nakama, sounds like a great place! Hahahaha" he laughed merrily.

Iruka breathed a sigh of relief that the boy had agreed so easily. "Good. School starts tomorrow, so get ready" the man said with a smile.

"Yeah! Need strong. I'm going to be the Pirate King. Ninja Pirate King?" said Luffy, and he seemed to lose himself in deep thought on the subject.

Bewildered by the odd comments and suddenly forgotten, Iruka let himself quietly out of Luffy's door.

Pirate King? What does that even MEAN?

00000

A/N: This is a comedic idea I had. In the manga Luffy swings from being normally intelligent and pretty insightful to being as smart as a sack of rocks. I like exploiting that idea to comedic effect.

I'm not sure how long this story is going to be or how often I'll update it. I guess it all depends on how popular it is. My goal would be a heavy dose of humor and alot of fun action to go with it. Oh and my idea is to replace Naruto with Luffy as the main character.