Chapter 57- X-Treme Warfare

Hi Guys!

Ok, for the last chapter, I made up an excuse, using Vader as the main part of it. Now? He has vanished on some kind of quest to Neverland and I really don't want to know. Something about finding the meaning of life, joy and how Never-landers can harness a power so much like the force. I tried to tell him it was simply Tinkerbell's doing, but he wouldn't listen. Life sucks sometimes, you know, hence the lack of updating, but now am hoping to finish with an update every two weeks seeing as I have a laptop and am living somewhere that is not making me insane. Hopefully, it's worth the wait and thank-you to all of you for sticking with me. Figured I'd start back with the whole competition between any and all characters ever :P Enjoy!

Me: *through PA system, to everyone currently stood in hall around the fighting ring* So, we are now down to the eighth to last round of this particular tournament! Let's hear it for those who, unfortunately, did not make it this far! (Oh, and to you readers that don't read my 'A/N's'? You might want to skip the bold entirely )
All: *Cheers etc.*
Me: Right, so, round one, we have… Steve Rogers, known to most as Captain America, and… Crickee? Okay, folks. That is one match I really want to see!
Round two, we are going to have… Jack Sparrow (And who knew that a Rum bottle could be used to such good effect?)
All: *Cheers*
Jack: Err… There should be a 'Captain' in there somewhere?
Me: Yes, so, Captain Jack Sparrow *pointed look to said Captain, who has the good grace to look rather sheepish, albeit smug* versus Abu the Monkey! Aww, look Jack! Another monkey you can try to shoot at and miss!
All: *laughter, as Jack (The undead monkey) from PotC swings in front of Jack (The awesome pirate captain who has far too much luck), poking its tongue out*
Me: Round three, we will be seeing Bugs Bunny, versus Han Solo! And no, Han. We are not going to make a rule to stop Bugs from making rabbit holes everywhere. It is far too amusing.
Next, round four… Iron Man, versus Jiminy Cricket! That's right, folks! The person who attempted to be my conscience is actually going to go head to head with an actual conscience- Oh, what's that? *covers microphone as Porky Pig, the secretary for this event, runs up to me*
Porky Pig: Raven, I am afraid that Jiminy Cricket has had to withdraw. Seems Pinocchio is having a Crisis of Conscience. He is debating whether to eat the apple that was intended to be a gift for his teacher!
Me: *Gasps* Well, by all means, wish Jiminy luck!
Porky Pig: *hops down, and runs from room again, his assistants, the three little pigs from Shrek, hot on his tail *
Me: *turning back to crowd* Sorry guys, it would appear that Mr Jiminy Cricket has had to withdraw due to a Crisis involving an Apple and a Conscience. In that case, it would appear that we will go to plan B, and call up Tarzan to fill in the blanks! What do you think, Tarzan?
Tarzan: Sounds good. How much do I get to beat up the Tin Man?
Me: As much as you like. Nice trick with the vines earlier, by the way.
Tarzan: *Modestly* I was lucky enough to get a jungle setting for the fight against that alien chap. That's all. Shame he had to get arrested again afterwards, those 'Men In Black' could have left it till the end of the tournament.
Me: Indeed… So, there we go! Round four will be Tarzan versus Iron Man! Tony, you'd better make sure your suit is fixed up! Wow, Tantor really did a number on it, didn't he?
Tony: *Glares*
Me: Ooookay then. On to round five… Legolas versus Hawk-eye- Oh, that is just classic. That is great! You know what? I think I'm going to circumvent the rules a little and make it a shoot-out between them, how does that sound, guys!?
All: *Loud cheers*
Elizabeth Swan: Huh, I love the fact my husband has to play an elf. Why couldn't he just be Will Turner?
Me: Err… You had Jack Sparrow on team PotC. Enough said.
Everyone: *Gives Elizabeth a weird look, as if to say that it was obvious*
Legolas/Turner: Err… Liz? Jack is like… Well. Jack.
Elizabeth: Oh… Whatever. And you are causing Jack's ego to get even larger.
Me: *Before Elizabeth spots Jack's smug look, and before he can try some rather futile flirtatious line, and generally in order to avoid a brawl* ANYWAY! So, we are going to have a shoot-out between our two resident Legol- Err, archers!
Legolas/Will: Err, I'm all for it? But Elizabeth can be scary. Can we make it a friendly side-match, and give Hawkeye a decent spar?
Hawkeye: *shrugs* I'm all for it.
Me: Err... Oh heck, why not. In that case, no matter his complaints, I'm recalling Master Shifu. Shifu! Get your bushy red tail up here right now! I don't care if you are trying to achieve inner peace or what-not, it can wait.
Shifu: *About to argue, then notices my expression and rapidly nods* Very well.
Me: Great! So, it seems our resident two Legola- Archers, are going to be doing a side attraction for us all!
Tony: *Sniggers*
All: *Cheer*
Me: *Sighs* Sorry guys, only those who've seen the movies will understand some of these references and jokes… To those who haven't? I recommend all of them :P Anyway, onto round 6! Ariel versus Lumiere! Should be an interesting one. A partially inanimate object, and someone who used to love collecting them! Oh, wait… This Ariel is from the first movie's time-line… I see. Some mess up with the paperwork there, and the time-lines people have been collected from… Anyway, I'll talk with the Doctor about that later. You don't need to know the technicalities. Would take up far too much time.
Round Seven! Slinky Dog versus- Holy Moon. Err, Slinky? You sure you want to battle the Hulk…?
Slinky: Darn right I do! But I'm having that Miss Hermione Granger as my second… If she don't mind?
Hermione: *blinks, then shrugs* Sure. Simple Petrificus Totallus'll be enough to get that done. Or maybe an Animagus reversal? Could be altered to-
Me: *Coughing to regain attention before Hermione starts off on another rant about Gamp's 5 Laws of Elemental Transfiguration* Err.. Okay then. Slinky versus the Hulk! I get the feeling that is one match you will not want to miss… So, Round eight! We are going to have Wolverine versus Batman-! Oh, no wait… It seems Logan has picked up something about Sabretooth, and has just left to track him down. Good luck with that, the Villain headquarters here are a maze. Literally. So, he has nominated Mole to take his place. *Blinks, and re-reads that several times* Okay, okay, you are telling me that, out of everyone in the Atlantis Character List, he chose Mole!? What about Vinnie!? Audrey? Kida? Heck, even Milo would- No offence Milo.
Milo: None taken. I'm just a linguist, mechanic and historian. I get that a lot.
Me: *Kinda guiltily* Anyway, no offence Mole, but Batman is kind of… Well. Batman.
Mole: Is okay! I have secret weapon!
Me: *Rolls eyes* Is it dirt, by any chance?
Mole: *Blinks, then huffs and crosses his arms, muttering about 'nothing being wrong with the dirt' then stamps his foot* Fine! I will nominate Vinnie to take my place! *mutters* I will then collect the dirt form the explosions! Yes… Yes, dirt from Raven's palace. Will be good to add to my collection-
Me: Mole! No digging up my dirt! And no taking Jack's either.
Jack Sparrow: What? No. No, it is my jar of Dirt. You cannot have the dirt! *runs and hides behind Elizabeth, which I think we can all understand?*
Me: Yes, well said, Jack. Mole! No dirt. Sweet, Audrey? Watch him.
Sweet: *nods* Will do.
Audrey: *cracks knuckles* You got it, Raven.
Me: So, there we have our line-up! Let's get this show on the road! Seamus, it's on you!
Seamus Finnegan: *Gleeful about even more announcing* You got it! Okay, welcome back everybody to the ultimate run-up to the ultimate battle of the ultimate characters of the ultimate fandoms of the ultimate-
Me: *drowning the noise out* Anyway, hope you guys enjoy the chapter!

"… School visit?"
"Da. I agreed for Guardian to speak with children. We are all busy, so falls to you."
Jack blinked, wondering if this was some kind of really bad joke.
"… School visit!?"
"Da. You agree? Good. Is tomorrow. I will take you. See you in morning, Jack."
Jack blinked as North hopped away (literally, as two elves had tied his feet together, without him realising, as he was talking), and sank into the sofa, groaning, and muttered to himself and, unbeknownst to him, a random elf who was gluing flowers into a vase, on the underneath of a table for some reason probably best left unanswered.
"Yay. School. Eternally stuck as a teenager, and I didn't even get out of bloody school."
_

Jack stared at the teacher.
The teacher stared at Jack.
The school's worth of kids stared at the staring match between the Summer Spirit(Who had won the prize draw for taking the session with the newest Guardian) and the Winter Spirit/Guardian.
Jack raised an eyebrow.
The teacher broke.
"Oh Moon, is so good to meet you! I mean, I knew you would be visiting, but I never thought I would actually be able to meet you and-"
Jack cut her off with a grade three smile and shrug combo.
"Pleasure to meet you, Miss…?"
"Summers. Tanya Summers. "
Jack grinned, winking at some of the boys in the class who were avidly watching this 'master of smooth' at work, as he took the young woman's hand(Seriously, must be a turned spirit. Very few spirit or fey would decide to stop aging at what appeared to be eighteen/nineteen-ish?) and kissed the back of it, before giving her a wide smile.
"Miss Summers, it is lovely to meet you."
Professionalism suddenly hit the young teacher again, as she coughed and turned back to her class, where several of the boys were religiously taking notes on Jack's technique. The girls were torn between glaring at the boys, and being jealous of said teacher.
"Ahem? Class, this is Guardian Jack Frost, who has agreed to come in to speak with you all today."
Looks that clearly said 'Well duh, is there anybody who doesn't know who he is?' were shot her way as she took her seat, gesturing for Jack to take the lead.
He did so with a lot of style, if he did say so himself.
The wind helpfully floated the chalk to him as he flipped over, through the air might he add, and wrote his name on the blackboard at the front of the class, before sliding across the desk and perching on the corner of it.
"So, yeah. Jack Frost. Short and simple… Though I have to say, some of the hyphenated names have amused me. Anybody got any examples? No? Darn, I was making a mental list of them… If any of you do know any, can you just write a list and hand them to me before I go? I'm trying to prove to Bunnymund I have worse hyphenated names than he does."
People nodded, and paper started rustling as some of them prepared to do just that. Jack grinned. That was one good thing coming out of today, at least. "So, seeing as North literally just grabbed me and shoved me down outside here with no idea of what I'm actually meant to be doing it, looks like I'll be completely improvising all of this. So nothing new there then, both with North being weird and me improvising."
Laughs greeted this, and he returned a grin.
"Anyway, with that in mind, I've decided to leave this session up to you guys. What do you want to hear about?"
One of the boys suddenly piped up.
"People say you have swords. Do you have swords?"
Jack laughed, as it finally hit him that these kids were not too dissimilar to human children. This could be a lot of fun… Though he did have to show some level of responsibility and maturity, unfortunately.
"Yes, I do. Lots of them. And daggers, bows and arrows, throwing stars and a variety of explosives. But I doubt the headmaster here would be very impressed if he heard me talking about swords and weapons…" He blinked at the groans, before rolling his eyes. "Though I suppose I can tell you about where I got some of them?"
Jack spent the next couple of hours talking about everything from things in his past, what he knew about the world in general, what he did as a guardian, what the others did as guardians, what he knew about the humans, whether it was true he had human friends, and making several refusals to show them his weapons. He also gave them a list of harmless pranks they could try. Well, he was Jack Frost, after all. It was his duty to create a new generation of pranksters.
He actually got into a discussion in French with one of the kids, without even realising he had done it. Which, of course, led to shocked looks and examples of several languages.
He had actually enjoyed himself, he realised, as Miss Summers collected up the lists of names the kids had made for him.
He blinked at how many there were, and how few were repeated.
"Rider-of-the-Wind!? Really?"
Sniggers met that incredulous exclamation, and so did nods, as he continued to read from the scraps of paper, looking more and more incredulous as he went on.
'Our-Lord-Guardian-Who-Art-The-Grand-Protector-From-Uncouth-Prankage-Eth' stood out a little.
'Fairy-Googie-Elf-Yeti-Overlord-And-Supreme-Mastermind' was another, as he detected Phil's hand in it, possibly Baby-Tooth. 'Holder-Of-The-Eyes-Of-God-If-God-Had-Eyes-That-Could-Take-Over-The-World' had several variations that changed God for Devil, boasted several variations of the term 'World Domination' and raved about the 'Enchantments' he could do with his eyes.
Then there were the names such as 'The-One-Who-Keepeth-Guardian-Bunnymund-On-His-Toes-Slash-Paws', and 'The-One-Whom-Guardian-North-Fears-Above-All', along with a variety of others focusing on the other Guardians. 'Grand-Sand-Manipulator-Of-Adorable-Kittens' had him truly worried for the literary side of the spirits education system.
He-Who-Guards-The-Fun-And-Delivers-Vengeance-In-The-Form-Of-Joy-Inducing-Humiliation... Okay, fifteen words? Really? Who had the time to say that in a conversation? Sheesh...
There were also ones such as 'Master-Chef-Of-All-Chefs', and 'Cookie-Lord', which he heartily hoped to never hear said out loud.
The kids had to be joking, right!?
But from the pitying looks he was being sent, he hazard a guess that they were being completely serious. He was totally going to bloody murder Iceman when he next saw him, as he read that 'Prince-of-Winter' was in there. Yep, that damned spirit was going down.
Jack sighed, using all of his restraint not to huff in front of people he was meant to show some level of maturity to, as he shoved them into his back-pack, putting his game-face back on.
"Well… Yay. I really hope Flow makes a good name soon. Using some of these would make conversations awkward, would they not?"

Jack was just getting back to the chat when the headmaster ran in. After the, seemingly obligatory, gushing, he gave the warning.
"Mother Nature has found out you are here and sent her new security team. She stayed within the limits of the deal we had with regards to the length of your visit, but you only have ten minutes left..."
Jack blinked, then mused.
No-one interrupted. After all, this was serious stuff...
"Okay," Jack said, after a couple of moments, "I might need to make a flashy escape. Of course, I would like permission to use smoke bombs within the school grounds? Wouldn't hurt anyone, but best to be careful."
"But of course. It would be an educational experience for the children to see you in action."
"... Yeah. That. Then, if they can't see me, I can make a quick escape. Not risking anything more in a school ground, which was probably what the canny security leader was hoping for. Thankfully, I have some stuff to help."
"You brought things to a meeting like this?"
"Can never be too careful. Pitch has been very quiet recently, which is always a cause for concern."
"Err..." this was one of the kids, who blushed brightly at realising they had verbally spoken up, but continued when Jack raised an eyebrow, "- you did kind of light up his cavern again. Apparently, I heard my parents saying he was simply giving it up for a few years. Vacation away from the world."
Jack pouted.
"Well... Darn. Now who can I call my arch nemesis?"
Another child spoke up, as if it were obvious.
"The head of Mother Nature's new security?"
"... I like this kid. Okay, so, new arch nemesis. Anyway, I had best be off."
"Could you please make this escape through the front gate, Guardian? It provides the best view from these windows." He looked more eager than any of the kids, which was a very impressive feat.
Jack shook his head, bemused. These were like no teachers he had ever bloody met. Nice change. And who was he to say no? It was only a friendly war after all. Kinda like what the rivalry with Pitch had turned into after the Prank partnership all those months ago. No bonding experience like a pranking quest. Or hiding from a grateful Tooth Fairy Queen. Couldn't forget that...
Now then, what did he have? Two smoke grenades, two sleepy-sand grenades and three portals.
Easy plan. Smoke them, then escape through a portal in such a way that no-one could see he had done it. After all, vanishing into thin air? Wouldn't hurt his reputation.
Now then, that sorted, he grabbed the staff, where the wind had carried it to him, and saluted the students, kissed the back of Miss Summers hand again and shook hands with the headmaster before casually stepping from the three-story window.
And landing, in a smooth crouch, one hundred yards in front of Mother Nature's head of security. Who had been hired simply to catch him so that Mother Nature could deliver her 'Rant-for-the-ages'. Why were there so many hyphens in his life suddenly, anyway?
Ah well, he could think on that later. Time to make a new 'frenemy'.
"Morning Captain. Mike, right?"
"I- Yes. But that was supposed to be secret?"
"Come now, Mike. I am Jack Frost."
"... Very true. So, not going to come along easy then?"
"... Sorry Captain. Not today. I believe Bunnymund is starting the Guardian pun-war tradition later today, and I really don't want to miss it. They are not going to wait for several days whilst Mother Nature says what she needs to."
"Understandable... Of course, I can't simply let you-"
"Of course. I have to escape in some heroic way, and leave yet another tale to be added to the legend my life has apparently become. No, that is not my ego. Too many people would hit me if it was my ego."
"Of course... So, you set?"
"Always." Jack replied, looking insulted, and the Captain grinned.
"Excellent. I can't believe I actually get to go up against Jack Frost! Ahem, I mean... Team! Move!"
Jack grinned. Another fan? Brilliant! This just got so much more fun!
"Till next time, guys." With a salute, he threw a smoke grenade to the floor, the smoke spilling out and covering the entire area in a thick blanket of fog.
He quickly opened a portal to the Pole and jumped through, grinning as it closed behind him. Then blinked as he span right into a bemused Phil.

"Reeaaaoorgh? Huff Reeewo."
"Yeah, I had planned to come back in a few hours, but I had a run in with the new security that Mother Nature hired. Captain is called Mike, and I kinda like the guy. Anyway, made a heroic escape into the smoke and figured I might as well head here early."
"... Fruff."
"Tell me about it. Ah well, there goes any boredom that might have been developing. So, tell me more about the last Pun war the others had? I didn't catch all of it what with Bunny and Sandy glaring at each other. Sandy's sand daggers were distracting."

Captain Mike 'Keeper', best of the best in his business, nodded. Here was a worthy opponent.
He got his team together and had to hide a grin.
"Right men, this is someone like we have never faced. Jack Frost, Guardian of Fun, ultimate prankster, and fully capable of running rings around us if we are not careful. Fern, I want a full profile on him, yesterday. The rest of you, I want you to track down his regular movements. We may be lucky. Oh, and Fox? I want bright neon green rounds in those blasters. Intelligence says he very much dislikes that colour."
"Intelligence, Sir?"
"Let's just say, someone had a small grudge and had to even it out in a more unorthodox way."
"Yes sir."
"... Well? What are you all waiting for!? Get moving! I have to sort this with the Principle here."
_

Four hours prior, at the Security/Tracking Teams rendezvous...

Mike nodded to the spirit who had waltzed in, quite casually, and declared he had to get anonymous vengeance against Jack Frost.
"Bright or neon green. He hates it, you say?"
"One of his pet hates. Colour drives him crazy, especially if you get it on his jacket or his hair."
"Thank you, Mr Aquilo."
"Don't mention it," Iceman said, with a grin. "I have a little grudge from last Christmas. This way, I get back at him and he can't trace it back to me."
"Hint taken."
"Oh, and a quick tip? He rolls his sleeves up? Run. Or don't bother, because you've lost already."

"Aspen? What are you up to?"
"Nothing Clo'. Just told the Security guys to target Jack with bright or neon green, and aim specifically for his jacket, if he's wearing it, or his hair. Also warned them about the sleeves being rolled up, and how it signifies Guerrilla warfare 101."
"... If this gets back to Jack-"
"Yeah, yeah, I won't be able to show my face for a decade. But totally worth it."
Clover shook her head, sighing. Her husband was bloody crazy.
_

North sighed as he looked between Bunny and Tooth. Neither was backing down.
Very well.
Sandy was hovering, a solemn look on his face, and even Jack was looking serious. This was not a situation to be taken lightly after all.
North sighed again as Tooth gave an impatient huff, though she did not deviate from her staring competition with Bunnymund.
Phil was there, in his official capacity as record keeper, and was ready to jot things down. A fairy had been assigned to each Guardian, to record the puns used when in presence of others to avoid any kind of bias, what with having been through this too many times to even care any more.
There was no more reason to delay.
"One." North started, figuring it would be best not to prolong the misery. Jack had opted out of the initiation ritual, instead choosing to ensure that there was no escalation of hostilities between Bunny and Tooth as the others completed it.
A giant golden two entered the air, as Sandy gave a huge, silent sigh and signed to Jack.
And so it begins again… Poor Sandy had such a disadvantage, what with the… well, no speech, that Jack had instead decided to actually join in, though he had not planned to originally, and all of his points would go joint with Sandy. The others did not mind. They thought Jack was too much of a newbie to the great game. He and Sandy had shared a smirk. Let them believe that…
"Three." This was Tooth, and her voice was carefully controlled.
"Four!" Bunny completed, a vicious grin in place.
North mentally asked pre-emptive forgiveness to everyone and everything as he solemnly completed the declaration.
"Let us begin the Pun War."

After the ceremonial thirty seconds of silence (born from necessity, as the first few times they had done this there had been such a cacophony of noise that everything had gotten out of control) Tooth was the first to speak.
"This is going to be fun! But this time, I will catch up Aster."
So far. The scores were as such. Bunny was in the lead, followed by North, then Tooth and finally Sandy. They didn't count wins, instead they tallied up their puns, with one point per pun, every time this happened, which were added to their overall score. Tooth was desperate to up her position, and the three were so busy planning their next encounters over the next two weeks that they missed Jack musing as he took into account all of the points.
To be third, he and Sandy would have to get a joint amount of 26 puns more than Tooth. Not impossible. Then 37 more than North and 53 more than Bunny.
Damn, these guys were good, especially Bunny apparently, but Sandy had not done badly at all, what with his ability to pun being limited simply to charades.
Oh yes, this could go well. Give it a few pun wars, and their duo would soon be something to worry about. It would be a long haul, but it would be worth it.
He rolled his eyes at the trash talk going on between the other three, as he mentally made a timetable so that he would be in contact with the Guardians for the majority of the next two of weeks, until 'Time' was called by Phil's dutifully clock-watching assistant, Jeff, and grinned reassuringly at Sandy as he got to his feet. He wanted cookies.
"Well, I will leave you children to your petty squabbles. Have 'Pun' now!"
Lu, the fairy assigned to Jack, shook her head and grinned as the Guardians realised that the novice had just made a statement. The game had a new player.
Dutifully, she ticked off a mark on her tiny clipboard and flew after Jack, before making herself comfortable in his hair. This was going to be so much fun!
_

"Iceman? You are in trouble."
There was silence for a few seconds until Iceman dived behind Clover, clinging to her leg and using her as a shield against the irritated looking Guardian.
"I didn't do it! I didn't tell them to shoot you with green paint! It is a pure coincidence-"
"Tell who what now?"
"... Nothing. Absolutely nothing-"
"What did you do...?"
"... Clover! Activate defensive formations!" He dived behind the sofa, as Clover simply shook her head.
"Jack, please stop breaking him? It takes me weeks to fix him each time..."
"... Fine. What is he talking abut, green paint?"
"... You'll see soon enough." Plus, she thought to herself, it would give them both time to hide. "Anyway, why did you come? What did he do now?"
"PRINCE OF WINTER!?"
"... Oh. That. Yeah-" She was interrupted as Iceman stuck his head out from behind the sofa, armed with a slingshot and water balloons, and he earnestly pointed to Clover.
"She did it! She spread the name! It was her, not me!"
"Aspen Acquilo! You insufferable, snitching-"
Jack, as he saw Clover whack the other guy around the head and proceed to rant about 'sticking up for each other, even against 'The-Guardian-Of-Chaotic-Over-The-Top-Completely-Awesome-And-Utter-Fun-Topped-With-Sheer-Breathtaking-Legendary-Humiliating-And-Intensely-Amusing-Pranking-Doom-With-A-Side-Order-Of-Chilling-Grace-And-Accuracy', seeing as they were married', he decided to just leave. Staying held the risk of hearing that 32 word long name again.
It was horrifying... Seriously, what was with the names!? Surely someone must have started it. And by Moon, when this Mother Nature thing was over, he was going to find out who it was and prank them for the next century!

Meanwhile...
Bunnymund, in his warren, was sniggering to himself as he handed a new name to three different messenger eggs, in order for them to go and 'drop' them in front of the most popular gossips (Known to most as every sprite in the spirit world), before proceeding to do the same with six other new horrors, though he had yet to beat his rather impressive Thirty-Two worded wonder. Oh yes, Jack was right. The best pranks were the ones where no-one knew it was you...
_

"Come on, Tooth. Tell the tooth now? How bad was it-"
"Damning it all. Jack, these puns are terrible, but at the same time, they are not!"
Jack grinned, as Lu placed another tally mark down.
"Fine, I'll put my worse ones on Ice. Hop over, Bunny?"
His fairy ref dutifully jotted down the two new puns, grinning. She was almost on her second notebook already! Sandy was going to be happy.
"Frostbite, can you at least make your puns... Slightly tasteful?"
"I could... But where would be the pun in that?"
"... Jack, stop being so quick all the time? We know you're a Jack of all trades, but-"
"Oh, Fairy nice Tooth! And sorry, but I'm kinda just winging it with my little buddy here." Three more marks went down.
"... Sandy? No fair. You can't just pick up the newbie who has a ridiculously quick mind-"
Sandy simply looked smug. So North threw a cookie at him. Which missed. So he threw more. Which also missed.
"Stay still. Is just luck you are avoiding-"
"So... They are fortune cookies?" One more mark on the tally of the winter spirit.
"... We could just avoid him for the rest of the war? Might give us a chance to catch up-"
"No, is against rules-"
"But mate, come on-"
"No! Is principle of the thing-"
This started a cat fight between North and Bunny, until Tooth interrupted-it could be noted that she interrupted just as North was tugging on Bunny's ears and Bunny was about cut North's beard off with one of his own swords- with a whack across the head.
"That is enough-"
"Ooh, Pitch slap!"
"... Though Bunny may have had a point. We need to 'guard' our positions on the leader-board." Tooth's ref shrugged, considering, and nodded, tallying a point off.
"Eggstra, Eggstra, read all about it! Bunnymund makes history by finally being right about something!"
The small fairy at his shoulder squeaked, and he shrugged.
"I know, I said it twice, but it was the same pun. I would feel bad taking a point for each use of it. Would 'make a point' though..." Two more tally marks.
North groaned, shoving himself to his feet and pacing.
"Bunny, Tooth? I propose alliance. All points gained by us will be shared, as with Sandy and Jack."
Nods met him, and Sandy and Jack shared a look, before shrugging and nodding themselves.
"Da? Good."
_

"Hello Bunnymund."
"... Frostbite?"
"I just saw the strangest thing."
"Oh?"
"Yes. A little messenger egg dropping a slip of paper in front of a Sprite council room. On picking it up, imagine my surprise when I saw a name I have not yet had the misfortune of having heard about..."
"Hehe... Yeah. Odd, right mate-?"
"Odd indeed... Of course, you would not be foolish enough to do that... Right?"
"Moon, No! I'm not bloody crazy! Egg could have been carrying a message for anyone! Not like I keep a direct manifest..."
"... Indeed. You paint a good alibi..." Another mark from his Fairy ref, who was close to finishing her second notebook. "Such a shame I have too much going on to look too far into it... Right?"
"Hehe, yeah... Hows the crusade going?"
"Not bad. I had plans to visit Flow at Spectrum's later, and I doubt it's going to be all sunshine and rainbows..." Another tally mark. "Odds of them turning up are being placed at 100 percent. Jamie is very pessimistic person."

… Or he was a psychic, Jack sighed, as the bar was suddenly full of combat ready guards, who had entered using the windows, the stairs, drilling through the floor-which had rather impressed Jack, despite the situation, solely due to the dedication required for that- and one even diving across the bar dramatically.
Silence reined, before the other patrons slowly made their way to the other room, which, thankfully, had a large doorway. There were only eight of them. They could all be witness to the chaos that was likely to ensue...
Flow sighed, shaking her head as she got to her feet too.
"You know, they could just use the door- Oh. There we go. Common sense."
This was to Mike, who had just booted the door open, paint-ball rifle at the ready, and who blinked as the small sprite casually skipped across his path, perching on the bar.
"Ten Spry on Jack, Spec?"
"... Flow, there are like twenty of them..."
"True... Twenty spry on Jack?"
"... You're on. He's good, but not that good."
Jack gave him a genuinely wounded look.
"... Ouch. I am hurt... Like, that actually physically hurt. "

Jack was almost surprised when one of the guards decided to actually attack. As in, not fire with his net-firing super-rifle, but literally do a random standing start combat roll towards him, before springing up and attacking with a can of explode-a-foam, which was foam until it mad contact with something, at which point it turned to a more cement like substance.
The sheer audacity! To attack him with his own inventions!? And not even have the grace to do so stylishly, what with immediately squealing in terror and bolting for the hole in the ground, provided by his team member, as soon as he realised Jack simply got some of it on his sleeves.
His Jacket. They did not even allow him to remove his leather, one-of-a-kind jacket.
"I liked this Jacket." A shield of ice appeared over the tunnel, blocking any further escapes, as he deftly and casually removed the jacket, ducking and dodging the now frantic free-fire paintballs, foam explosions and goo blasts as he did so, and idly tossing it to Flow, before remarking that most of the things he was being bombarded with were green. Now what was it Iceman had said about Green...? He would deal with this at a later date.
Now, he had to focus on taking down his opposition.
It took a full seven minutes, him getting more and more impressed each time one went by, but he finally succeeded. Three were now encased in concrete foam, muttering about taping their guns to their hands next time, four were in a similar predicament, only encased in mounds of very thick compacted snow. One was gaffa-taped to a table, though no-one was quite sure where the gaffa-tape had come from, two were swinging from newly built ice chandeliers on the ceiling, one was quivering behind a table fort that Jack had been kind enough to help him build and would probably need therapy, four were roped together around another table, a glass of whatever they had felt like at the time in their hands, and another was sat at a stool at the bar, sipping a ribena, ignoring the fact that he was now in only his underwear. They had also lost one through a window and a couple through the front door. From where Mike was, sipping his ribena, he could see that they needed a new strategy, stealth based. And more weapons, more creative and destructive weapons. Then they would lure him into a forest or somewhere equally in the wilderness and then they would attack! After all, the forests were Mother Nature's domain. They could not lose!
Though why there was a little fairy seemingly jotting down notes as Jack made terrible puns throughout the entire fight was beside him. Things such as 'turning the tables' on them as he span tables, and having a 'smashing time' as he created harmless ice bottles for a more authentic bar fight.
Jack, on the other hand, was stood still, bemoaning the fate of his jacket. It would forever have a stitched up, no matter how expertly, patch, where he had, to his eternal shame, been caught off guard. His jacket was scarred... But would live on. And he would drink to it's courage.
"Spec? Get me a Pot of Gold..." His eyes narrowed dramatically, as his voice lowered. "And play the classics."

Three hours later, as dusk was falling, spirits from all around had come to witness Jack Frost consuming alcohol.
For the first glass, he had simply been louder about bemoaning the fate of the jacket. For the second and third, he had started karaoke. Now, almost completely through the entire bottle, he was hunched over the rafters, eerily eyeing anyone that moved, staff twirling as he sipped the drink from a brandy glass, shadows behind him to make greater the eerie overlord effect he was going for, courtesy of Pitch, who was skulking in a corner, albeit less stylishly, as he also did not want to miss the show.
To be honest, as he went onto the final glass, two ice-cubes appearing in small swirls and dropping into the glass with two very clear clinks that echoed through the eerie silence, everyone was expecting this one to be the one that made him leap from the rafters and hunt down those that dared try and best him.
But he simply continued to sit there, eyes moving eerily in the shadows, as he focused on anyone foolish enough to move. Closing time came around and slowly, ever so slowly, people, one by one so as not to startle him, inched their way to the door. Finally, it was simply Spectrum left, and he managed to coax the youngest spirit from the rafters with a cookie and a piece of metal he reflected a small light off of. Taking a picture, he chose to use this blackmail, possibly the only existing piece in the world, as a back-up for all the possible back-up plans ever. Or he could sell it on the black-market, or start a war, or take over the world. The possibilities were endless. Right now though, he decided to simply let Sandy take over, as he finally appeared to pick up Jack, three hours after Spectrum had sent the emergency message to the pole, and slumped down with a glass of Brandy behind the bar. And decided he would just take the next day off.

It took Jack a whole five minutes after waking to regret the drinking. Not because of a non-existent hangover, but because of the teasing. And he now had a new name, 'Rafter Monkey'. Bunnymund was proud of himself for that one, and it was better than Snowball, so Jack let it slide. He had more important things to worry about. Namely, how to avoid being caught off guard again.
_

Three days later, and Jack was just about to leave Burgess after an idea gathering meeting, when he found his hood being yanked, and he ended up skipping backwards.
"Hey-! Err... Pitch? What ya doin'?"
"Give it a minute. You'll see."
"Then could you stop tugging- Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow... Hey! Ow..."
An orb trip later, from where Jack had idly handed him one even as he kept up his repetitive 'Ow'ing, and they were outside his cave.
"Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow- Finally." He gave Pitch a long suffering look, re-arranging his hoody. "Thank you very much. Now, why the hell did you drag me out here?"
Pitch simply pointed behind him, and Jack span, only to find himself facing a very bemused looking guard unit.
He turned back, shrugging.
"Ah... I see."
"Yes, so do I. Unfortunately, I have had to see them at least twice a week for the last month because, for some bizarre reason, they seemed to think I knew where you were."
"... You did just find me."
"Only because they were being insufferable and forced my hand. Clause nine of the whole truce contract. You get rid of annoyances. They are an annoyance."
Jack rolled his eyes, as he was handed a contract copy. Sure enough, Clause nine.
'Any minor inconvenience caused by either party must be dealt with by the responsible party if it continues for more than three consecutive days/appearances.'

He shrugged at the group as he folded it up and handed it back.
"Sorry guys, it's in the contract."
A sudden barrage of snowballs hit them all, sending them all to the floor, and Jack nimbly dodged the various shots aimed at him. Hang on, when did they get Dream-sand ammunition!?
Jack huffed. If this was why North asked Sandy for it, there would be cookie hell to pay... Wait- Were they getting up? And... Grinning?
Pitch took one look and decided he was going back on holiday.
"Luck to you Frost." Then he vanished into his weird bed hold n the ground and left Jack facing the group of diminished numbers.
"So... How is Rupert?" Rupert being the one having hidden under a table fort.
"... He is terrified of the colour green now. But has no issue with custard."
"Custard?"
"That Partner slash secretary of yours attacked him with jello-custard."
"Oh... Well. I'm glad he has no grudge. Custard is good. Now then, why are you looking smug?"
"You are in the forest."
And all at once it hit him.
"I see... Mother Nature's favourite domain."
"Indeed... Now, why are you looking smug?"
"... I like Animals. Animals like me. Rabbits make good blankets."
Mike's heart sank. His second in Command, Sophia's, heart sank. Every heart sank. And they were so sure they had him... But there was still hope! What could small furry critters do to a fully trained commando team armed with the latest technological advanced weaponry and pranking gear? Stare at them? Head-butt their boots? Mike said so, impressively turning this logic into a stirring speech that made sunken hearts rise and harden with resolve as they prepared to do battle, only for a girlish scream, obviously from Lieutenant Green, to sound behind them.
"Stand sharp, Lieutenant! Report!"
He raised a shaking arm and pointed in the direction of the treeline.
"The- The B-Bunnies..." Sure enough, the ground surrounding them was teeming with bunnies, the most adorable bunnies, all staring at them with wide innocent adorable eyes. Steve, their tech expert, snorted.
"Come on green, they're rabbits. What are they gonna do?" Sniggers had erupted, but when Jack coughed to get attention, Green gulped and threw up his arms in surrender.
"I was at the Battle of the Pole. I saw what you did with the rabbits. Please accept my immediate and unconditional surrender and withdrawal from any and all further attempts to coerce you into the clutches of Mother Nature."
Jack considered, then nodded.
"For a hardened Veteran such as you, how could I deny such a request. If any of your team mates would also like to withdraw, I shall be lenient..." After a few seconds, Jack shrugged at the lack of movement. "Ah well, I tried. Here, Green, have a cookie and go reminisce with Shady. I think you two would get on well. My secretary can give you his contact details."
"Sir, Yessir!" Green shrugged to Mike. "Sorry Boss, I'll see you all back at HQ. Take on the case about the odd messenger eggs harassing the sprites."
"Very well Lieutenant, I understand."
Green head off, nervously stepping through as the bunnies parted, in eerie concert, to allow him through. It was only when they moved, once more in eerie concert, to re-close the gap that the rest of the unit began to feel uneasy. Jack idly fashioned himself a chair out of snow, and picked up one of the bunnies, stroking it as he seated himself, grinning evilly.
"Oh Mike, and here I thought you had some sense. Gale? Please set the shielded perimeter."
Seemingly form no-where, Gale appeared.
"Jack? Please stop setting trip alarms around any key place in the forests? Just because I have access to Bunnymund's tunnels, doesn't mean its not difficult to use the wind in there to get around."
"... But you have to admit, the fact that I have a portable trap is pretty awesome. Please just put up the shields?"
She sighed, but used the wind to create a fast blowing gale that surrounded the area outlined by bunnies.
"You owe me, Jacko."
"Yeah, Yeah, How about something special on your birthday? I'll cook?"
"... Deal."
Jack turned his attention back to the group, who were not firing for risk of the wind sending any misfired rounds back at them, and grinned.
"Minions! Pile-on!"

Less than a minute later, there was nothing but mounds of bunnies, with the odd hand or leg or tuft of hair sticking out,, flailing at first, then finally slumping. Eventually a muffled Ok, we give up!" was finally heard, at which point Jack released the group, mentally making a note to throw a few baskets of carrots around the place when he next popped by, and placed his prop minion back with it's fellows as he tutted.
"Sorry boys and girls, you'll have to try a little harder than that."
And as he flew away, the wind dying down as his obvious ally accompanied him, Mike started to realise he might have to think more unconventionally. Not once did the thought of giving up cross his mind. No, he would just have to get some allies of his own.
_

Shady mused. Mike was nervously waiting for his reaction, having tracked him down in the hopes of allying himself with Jack's, for all intents and purposes, second in command. Well, aside from Bunny, but the Pooka was embroiled in his own war, and nobody in the spirit world was quite insane enough to interfere with the Pun War.
"So... Michael."
"... Yes?"
"Tracking me down, I have to say, has impressed me. And that is your best bet."
"... To... Impress Jack?"
"Indeed. If you impress him enough, render him respectful of your tactics, your style, your dedication, his sense of... honour, I suppose, his respect of a worthy opponent, will eventually render it so he will respect your attributes and, at the very least, agree to a ceasefire. It will remain to be seen as to whether he will allow Mother Nature to deliver her rant, he might well decide to let her cool off, but from what I have gathered he is already respecting your dedication, and creativity with regards to tactics and adapting." This was Guerilla Shady talking, and Mike was getting a lot more optimistic.
"So... Just keep up the creativity and constant barrage?"
"... Basically? Yes."
"... Should you be telling me this?"
"Meh, as his second in command, it is my duty to make sure he keeps on his toes and does not lapse in his abilities."
"... Have you ever been interested in-"
"Nope, I'm good. If I accepted every job offer I had, I would likely rule the world by now, without anyone realising I am the ruler."
"... And have you accepted any of those job offers?"
Shady vanished and reappeared next to the door, not replying, instead opening it and nodding to Mike with a small smirk.
"Farewell Captain."

Meanwhile...
"Green, Iceman? I had no clue what you were talking about. No clue at all... But now my new arch nemesis is shooting green paint, foam, and even silly string at me? I am slightly more suspicious. Have anything to say for yourself?"
Aspen was frozen, like a deer in headlights, as he glanced around looking for a means of escape, before realising, oh yes, he had chosen to hide in a heavily fortified underground bunker. Clover had opted for Gale's place, high in the trees, with several branches making pathways in all directions and with a nifty slide directly to Bunnymund's warren. He was just starting to realise maybe she had had the best idea after all...
"Erm..."
"Because I was distracted. And my Jacket was ruined. And the paint was green. And I got drunk. And have seven plans for taking over the world that could work, all in a notebook right next to my recipe book in the Vault.. But that is besides the point. You told them, did you not?"
The instinctive, and by now traditional, 'All Hail The Vault!' was spoken, before Aspen shrugged, sheepishly.
"... I know where Bunnymund keeps the list of names he has made up for you?"
That made Jack pause as he was reaching for North's magically enhanced super-glue and human children's fairy wings, as well as varying kinds of feathers, and blink.
"Artful manipulation. I shall allow the distraction. Are you offering the location?"
"... If I tell the location, and distract Bunnymund, therefore arousing his suspicion and putting myself at risk of retaliation from him, would we then be even?"
"... Will you wear fairy wings as part of your distraction?"
"Any particular reason?"
"Baby-Tooth asked. Said it would amuse her."
"... We have an accord."
"It appears we do."

"Hey Bunny."
"Hey Iceman- What... Why are you dressed as a fairy?"
"Baby-tooth. I have a set for you too. I need to get a photo of the two of us together, wearing fairy wings."
"Mate, you're a dingo if ya think I'm gonna so much as consider wearin'-"
"Aww, come on Bunny, please? You have no idea how much is riding on this. Baby Tooth is in sugar high mode and has a secret stash of cookies. I have been hired by Tooth to discover this stash and the only way to earn Baby-Tooth's trust is to get this photo."
"Mate, not a chance in-"
"I did not want to do this, Bunnymund. I really did not want to do this." Aspen sighed, then looked over Bunny' shoulder. Instinctively, Bunny turned, and realised there was nothing there even as he was hit with a dream-sand ball.
Jack landed next to Aspen, who had just thrown the ball and knocked out the Pooka, looking a the spirit incredulously.
"Knocking him out!? Really? That was your great distraction plan?"
"Indeed. I shall now also take the photo, having stuck on the wings of course, and get Tooth in on it for authenticity."
Jack shook his head, but solemnly shook the other spirit's hand.
"You have learned, my young Apprentice. I might just have to test you for an upgrade in status."
"Maybe after the current decade's worth of crises is over?"
"Indeed. Ah well, to work!"
One fairied up Pooka later, and with Jack now the proud owner of one book filled with creative and soon to be destroyed names, and the pair left.
_

It took three more attacks, culminating in Jack having to get brand new boots-which would not be easy, what with them being, well, awesome and all- as well as having to, dare he admit it, retreat from a battle in order to recuperate, before Mike received a stylish black envelope, covered in an equally stylish icy pattern, with a note inside.
'Captain, to you and your team.
You had my attention, you then had my interest, now you have impressed me. I will not surrender to your demands, but perhaps you could arrange a meeting with your employer, on cordial terms, to discuss a compromise. As well as optional bartering n order to reach a settlement we both deem agreeable. I have come to think I will be hard pressed to keep up our current level of warfare with quite a busy schedule. Also, please find enclosed invitations for you and your team to a rather special event, more details are provided on the invitations.
Yours sincerely, Guardian Jack Frost.'
Mike grinned, handing out the invitations, and immediately heading for the nearest postal office. He needed to dispatch an egg, stat.

Jade, picking up the post, blinked at the familiar looking icy patterns on what appeared to be an invitation, as well as the newly familiar script of Captain Mike, or Mikey, as she liked to call him, and grinned as she realised something was gonna happen.
"Mama Nat!? You are going to want to see this!"

Jack sat, casually, on the offered chair, nodding to the person who was just sitting opposite him.
"Mama Nat."
"Jackson."
Tooth, who had agreed to host this little conversation, making for neutral and more private ground, slowly left the room. They could sort this out between themselves, and their associates of course. One does not simply turn up to such a thing alone.
Jade, sat to Mama Nat's left, nodded to Jack, hiding a slight grin. Flow, having insisted o the job, took a seat mirroring this to Jack's left, nodding to both. She slowly pulled a sheet of paper out from her folder, then another piece with some kind of list on it, along with an old fashioned and therefore more official looking pen, and nodded.
"Very well, shall we begin?" At the nods, she cleared her throat and read from the second piece of paper. "Upon further deliberation, Guardian Frost has decided that further hostilities might be detrimental to both business and social interactions for both involved parties. He is therefore offering a compromise. In exchange for the termination of all plans for 'ranting', You, Mama Nat, will be given sole ownership of one of the twelve 'lost' recipe's. It will be randomly selected, by you, through the drawing of a slip of paper from a hat. We are also open to negotiation."
Mama Nat deliberated, and had a muffled conversation with Jade, before nodding.
"Your terms seem agreeable... But for the fact that I will lose such a valued opportunity, I require A, more of a choice in which recipe I shall receive, namely that you can assure me it will be both sweet and summery, and B, I will also be assured of eternal exemption from further pranks."
Jack blinked, then whispered to Flow quietly, before speaking up.
"I can agree to the selected criteria for the recipe. But I cannot agree to the second term. I am willing to consent to fifty years."
"Three centuries."
"One century, and I shall help to set defenses against the young brownies who insist on proving themselves to everyone by breaking into your summer gardens simply because they can."
"... You will create plans for defending my four seasonal homes and Gardens, as well as helping in the defense of the Summer Gardens."
"It will have to fit around my timetable, so whoever you hire will acquiesce to that."
"... I think we have come to an accord."
"I do believe we have. Flow, please script the agreement into a contract, so that we both may sign and have a copy."
Ten minutes later, and the task was completed. Jack escaped the rant, Mother Nature was to receive her new recipe at the secret 'ceremony' she had been invited to, along with, it seemed, several other select individuals, though they were still unaware of what it was actually about, and Jade was chatting with flow about whether it would be too 'Far Out' for a summer spirit to dye her hair blue, to which Flow was avidly saying no, it wouldn't be. Mike, standing outside the door, heaved a huge sigh of relief as the pair cordially walked out, Jack being a gentleman and holding the door open, and shook hands with Jack.
"Well fought, Guardian."
"You too, Captain. If ever you wish to have a few training sessions together, your group all invited of course, just let me know."
"I would be delighted. And we have all agreed to come to this... ceremony tomorrow night. It looks to be interesting."
"Indeed. You have had no trouble with the instructions to locate my home?"
"Indeed not, they were very through. And your secret is safe with us, we are honoured to be invited."
"No problem Captain, will see you tomorrow night."
_

Upon arriving at the Monastery, and after getting over the awe factor of it, Mike started to take in who else was there. Wow, it seemed as though he and his group had risen in Jack's esteem more so than he had thought. Present were Shady, Flow, Gale, Aspen, Clover and a few other spirits in their closer circles that Mike could not recall the names of. Present also were Spectrum, Mama Nat and J, or Jade as most called her. Several of Guardian North's elves and Yeti's were there, and some wore a distinctive leather belt, with ice patterns sealed in, showing they were part of Jack's secretive 'Plotting' Council. Quite a few small Tooth Fairies were present, along with a couple of mice who he believed were the French division? Possibly Spanish? Or were those the small hummingbirds? Ah well, definitely European anyway. There were also some human children, and Mike assumed they were Jamie, Sophie and some of the others Jack was heard to have associated with. What surprised him was the presence of Pitch Black, skulking in a corner, but as the others seemed to accept his presence and ignore as he seemed to want. Mike decided to just do the same. It was not long before they all felt a lot less out of place, and all were curious as to the nature of this little ceremony.
Bunny, who had just entered, attracted attention by displaying an obvious look of resignation, as he slumped down in one of the criminally comfortable chairs. The entire room was filled with them, and Mike wished some of the places he went to had similar tastes when it came to convention and gathering rooms. He had just caught the words 'should never have started the names...' when the room dimmed, and a small fairy flew into a single spotlight. Proudly wearing hat appeared to be a dog-tag as a shield, he could only surmise that this was the head of the Fairy contingent of Jack's 'Council', making her Baby-tooth. Through a microphone, she spoke up, language translated, he assumed, with a modified dose.
"Welcome, all of you, old and newer members of the crew alike, to tonight's gathering. On the agenda, we shall be handing over the agreed upon recipe to Mama Nat, to which we must also commend Captain Mike 'Keeper' and his team for such a dedicated and creative few weeks of warfare." There was a round of applause, and a few whoops, to which an embarrassed group nodded and thanked everyone.
"Then for he main event, we shall be carrying out a ritualistic and symbolic destruction of the Book of Names. For those who do not know, it is the rumoured book containing all of the created names for Jackie, all of which have somehow been circulated around the Spirit world. It is now known that E. Aster Bunnymund was behind this, but retaliation has already been carried out and all that is left is to destroy the book and all it represents. I only hope a decent name is found soon. Conversations have been getting a lot longer lately." Nods and agreements met this, they would really have to do some thinking.
"So, without further ado, let us begin!"
Mama Nat was motioned to the front of the room, where Jack floated in, a beautifully carved oak box In his hands, which he opened to reveal a scroll of tightly bound, old styled parchment, and all that could be made out was a small ink note in the corner, saying '#9'. Number nine? What did it mean? Hopefully, at Mother Nature's next Summer party, they might be able to find out...
After this had been handed over, with the proper amount of respect provided for such a momentous occasion, everyone eagerly leaned forward as several fairies carried out a leather bound book, with 'Names' written on the front of it.
Bunny sank lower in his seat, ears slumping as he watched his most recent pride and joy hover over a fire pit that was hastily being put together by several elves. Even one of them tripping over the stick longer than him, and rolling into a pile of small logs that sent several other elves tumbling into the ring of rocks wasn't enough to rouse him back up again, and every second of the three failed attempts to create the fire pit only added to the sense of defeat.
The fourth attempt was finally successful (most likely because two yeti's hastily built the pit whilst the elves were bickering amongst themselves, then convinced them they had done it themselves then got distracted) and the fire quickly built up, at which point Jack ceremoniously dropped the book into the flames. After a few seconds of silence, he clapped his hands grinning.
"Right, that's enough of that then. Now for the fun part. BT, Lights!"
Lights suddenly came on, revealing a huge table full of various foods and drinks, to which North rubbed his hands together, trying and failing to cough and cover the sound his stomach was making at the sight of the still steaming cookies.
"Ah, is my favourite part of gatherings! Come, we must eat!"
Mike looked at the others, shrugged, then joined in with the rest of the group, even as Pitch tried to slyly take a cookie before making his way out, having to keep up appearances after all. He got the feeling he would be invited to more of these meetings. It looked as though that was the way it worked with this group. From the corner, a small eruption of laughter was heard, easily recognisable as North's.
"No Tooth, Bunny was being far too cookie. Get it? Cookie!? Oh, I am cracking myself up. Get it? Because of googies!? " A small Fairy shook her head, but made some marks on a bit of paper she was carrying as Tooth and North bickered about the quality of puns or some such.
Mike hmm'ed. He might even get to fond out what that was all about at some point...
_

Three Months Later...

April Fool slowly poked his head out from behind the Bunker door, where he had spent the last twenty minutes undoing the locks on the second set of 'Frost-Proof Doors' as he liked to call them, and picked up the letter a small egg had just dropped outside. He had waited until it had vanished from his security screens before risking going outside.
Snatching it up, he retreated back inside, bolting up the doors in a frenzy before sitting down and letting his beating heart slow down again. Only then did he risk opening the letter, albeit using tweezers from behind 'Frost-Proof' glass and wearing thick gloves and a visor.
"Hey Fool, missed you at the quarter yearly gathering, where you been recently? If you're still hiding from Mama Nat and the whole debacle, it was over like three months ago. Had a party and burned stuff and everything. Seriously, the world is starting to wonder if you just gave up. Get your ass out here before I hunt you down. You have one week.
Yours, Jack."
Fool blinked, then reread the letter, then slumped down into his chair.
Three Months? Was he becoming too paranoid in his old age? Being replaced by a younger and more creative Prankster? He wallowed, before pausing in the wallowing as something struck him.
"Hang on, I have an entire Day named after me. All around the world! Will I let this young upstart outshine me!? No!"
He continued along this vein, talking to himself, and trying to mentally convince himself he was not just trying to talk himself into having the courage to venture outside, before something else struck him. It was April 2nd. He had missed his own damned day! Hence the reason everyone was probably concerned...
Fool grabbed a protein snack from his survival ration kit and chewed slowly, but it was not enough.
"Damn it all to the Moon and back, next year is going to be double the humiliation!"
He threw open the doors, marching out into the sunlight, before his stylish re-entry into the world was halted by the fact that his eyes were on fire from said sunlight. It was a good couple of minutes before he dragged himself to his feet and carried on, hoping no-one had seen, and returned to his store, ignoring the weird looks he was getting. The Guardian-Who-Pranked was going down.

Thanks to AngelofGrace96, Pottergal14, Jewel Becky and Caithlinn13 for coming up with some of the ideas for the hyphenated names for the Guardian-Who-Rules!
Oh, and I have had requests for a more angsty themed section next chapter, before I close this fic off properly, so any ideas anyone? If so, please let me know so I can put it in there. Plus any other requests. I am going to try and pack as much into the last chapters as I possibly can, so let me know! Only have plans for a couple more, so time is limited :(
Thanks to everyone who has followed and faved since the last update, I know it has been a while but hopefully you have enjoyed it none-the-less.

Just to explain, my views on the world of Rise of the Guardians, is that it is basically just a magical world, including things like sprites and brownies and creatures like that alongside the 'Spirits', with the addition of some of the spirits who were 'changed' by the moon when they died as a human (Like with my mini-story about Jade Summers). I am using the idea that the guardians are just key figures in a magical world hidden alongside the human world.

Also, could you please, if interested, give me reasons for why a particular character will win their particular battle in my AN's? Come on peoples, lets hear who your favourites are to win, ad the reasons why! Might even make it into the battle commentaries! Lets see how creative everyone can be :)

Oh, and Dragons Addicted? Totally the tenth Doctor. I rate the doctors on a scale of one to Tennant, Lol :)