Please read. This is something I wish I could write clearly. I don't know how bullying is like. Sure, I'm the odd one out at some stuff, but I've never thought of killing myself, or anything. This is me, trying to make people understand, we can't understand, we can just help and not make it worse.

Thank you.

I don't even know how it happened.

One minute I was alone; the next, imbecile Jordan was next to me.

"Hey, sweetie pie," he said, licking his lips, while a bunch of his friends laughed in the corner. I couldn't help it, I blushed.

"What do you want, jerk?" I asked him, feeling utterly humiliated when Katherine and Dona turned their heads to look at me and Jordan.

I wanted to die. Right now, right here.

"Well…I was wondering, could you take that Halloween mask off and give it to me?"

For thirteen, Jordan was an idiot.

My eyes stung. I wanted to punch him in the face or cry alone. Either one.

Katherine rolled her perfect brown eyes, while Done flipped her perfect black hair.

"We're not eleven, Jordan. That joke is been existing almost all the time since you had a look in the mirror" I said, voice weak.

Jordan raised his perfect blond eyebrows, "Oh, really? You know, sweetie, I want to punch you"

I started trembling. No, Miranda, I told myself, don't let this first-class idiots make you scared. They're only thirteen. You're fourteen. You're their superior. Katherine is watching! Dona is watching!

"Don't behave like you're so impressive, Jordan" I spat, full of confidence "You're not even fourteen, little guy. You don't have the muscle to punch a three year old."

I saw the fist before I felt the punch.

"Oh my god, are you okay?" a voice asked, filled with laughter.

I opened my eye and muttered.

Dona smirked "Are you okay, darling?"

Katherine just sighed "God, darling is so old"

I just turned away and pretended not to care or to be hurting " Go. Away. Katherine."

Dona flinched "Hey Miranda, it was just a joke. Are you okay?"

I rolled my eyes "I'm perfectly fine, Dona, Jordan's not even fit. He doesn't know how to punch."

Dona backed away, and said "Sure"

How can people not know that my voice is full of flatness and I'm lying?

Sitting in class is boring. That's a fact.

I just sat there, not really paying attention. Then, Mrs. Plum, our beautiful, kind and funny brunette teacher, said quietly "Hey, guys. I just found out about something"

Only a quarter of a quarter of the class turned. The rest remained silent. I turned.

Not because of what Mrs. Plum said, but because of the expression on her face: tired, horrified, broken.

"I hope you all knew Percy Jackson well…" she started, and my eyes stung.

No. This was the second time this happened to me. I wasn't going to let this happen.

"Well, he was on a gas station this Saturday, and someone accidentally dropped some gas they had, and then, as they were cleaning, a guy with some cigarette came and…"

By this point, all of the class was staring dumbstruck at Mrs. Plum pained and sad face. She wasn't crying, but she was close to tears.

"And…and…and it fell…"

Tammy, a girl with huge blue eyes and a bigger heart, started crying. I wasn't crying. I was sitting very quietly in my desk, not moving a muscle. I didn't know Percy. He was one of those gorgeous kids with that killer smile, charm and beautiful eyes. But I was sad. I had heard him talk, I had seen his friends, and I knew he was a good person.

"And…"

"Hey! Hey! What's going on? Did someone die?"

And bam! Percy Jackson himself, green eyes and jet black hair , came into class.

Tammy stopped crying, Mrs. Plum was silent. The whole class was staring at him.

Finally, Tammy couldn't bear it. She stood up and hugged him. "You're alive! Percy, you're alive!"

Percy looked freaked out, but he stroked Tammy's hair and gently pushed her away "Mrs. Plum, have I done something wrong?"

Stephanie Plum looked at him in disbelief and said "There was an explosion…gas station…"

Percy sighed, and somehow, I could read in his eyes that he was used to this.

I stood alone. Everyone was chatting away, laughing and eating.

I didn't eat anything. I didn't want to.

I wasn't lonely, of course. I had my books.

I sat, my back resting on the wall of the school, and read.

"Late in the winter of my seventeenth year, my mother decided I was depressed –"*

"What are you reading?"

I raised my head, startled because no one bothered to talk to me. Especially if I was reading.

And this was Percy Jackson. His perfect face looking down at me, a big smile on his face.

I was never close to handsome guys. Especially sixteen year olds with a giant reputation and flashy smiles.

I blushed because of the proximity, and immediately felt stupid. Of course, he's talking to me because he wants to show off to his friends that he dares touch Ugly Maddy.

For a moment I forgot about how sweet he seemed to be. Bitterness filled me to the brim, making my heart rate quicken with fury, my cheeks flush with anger, my dull brown eyes dark.

"None of your business" I answered, holding my chin up.

He looked surprised, "Yeah, but it seems like a good book. Too bad dyslexic kids can't read so many books as normal people. I guess you're luckier than me."

"Don't you dare" I said before I could stop myself.

Percy Jackson raised his eyebrows "Oh, what did I do?"

I shook my head in disbelief "You know, you handsome people think you're so amazing. You just don't realize. Since we're three were taught that the important part was the inside. When did beautiful people forget that? When, can you tell me? When did society thought it was right to give desperate fifteen year olds girls magazines about gorgeous girls with more Photoshop than you could think, and make them think it was the thing they should do? Looking good, I mean. Why was there a necessity of being artificial? Why couldn't you just stare at the mirror and think 'I'm beautiful'? Why was there a need for make-up? Who thought about insecurity? Maybe real beauty is seeing through all of it." I laughed bitterly, so, so bitterly it scared me "And you know the best part? Kids like me, people who have not know perfection on their faces, who have birthmarks, people who are overweight, do you know what happens to us? We forget they're wrong. We forget this is society's way of destroying us. They make us believe we are horrible. They make us believe we must change because we are not them. And I'm forgetting about it, because if you are surrounded by the ones you admire, and they tell you how much you suck, heck, you start to believe it. And you, kids like you who are amazing and perfect and can bring a full class to cry on their supposed death, are complaining. Do you know how much people in class would cry if I or Mary-Joe died? Or even Tammy, sweet little Tammy? No one. So don't complain because you can't read. Complain because no one is reading to you." I yelled

Percy Jackson stared at me, smiled, and sat next to me.

"The Fault In Our Stars," he read from the cover "What's it about?"

I blinked. He was touching me, and he hadn't made a comment at all about my rant on a how he was horrible.

"Um, it's about Hazel"

Percy gestured for me to continue "Go on"

"She's got…cancer. Lung cancer."

Percy looked at me "She's sick, so she's going to die, isn't she?" he didn't wait for m answer "And it's not her fault, she didn't decide to be born with this thing, now, didn't she? And, since she knew, I bet she knew she would die. I bet that didn't stop her. I'm not much of a reader," he looked at me in the eye, and I marveled on his sea-green eyes "but I know one thing." His face darkened "Superheroes, the heroes, the powerful, the emotion-less, you know that person? Their life sucks. Because happy endings don't make up for the path you take to get there. They know what you're feeling, because not all of us were born already knowing our place, our inheritance, our chances, our possibilities of life." He took my hands "They know pain, but people don't notice, because they haven't felt that. They weren't the underdog."He laughed humorlessly too "They were always just, there. But sometimes, in our bitterness and our pain change us. You can't let that happen. You can't judge people because they're living okay. You can't hate persons because they have a good life. You have to look at them, and think 'Gee, now my life sucks, but at least I don't worry about breaking a nail, I don't care if my iPhone breaks down.' That's what makes kids like us strong. It's not our fault, but we can't blame others because of our misery if they aren't directly there." He raised my head with his hand "You have a heart of gold, a brain bigger than half the world, a smile brighter than the morning sun, and your life will go on, but only if you want to. If you decide that 'blame the world, I can't do anything about it', then you are lost. You can't blame neither yourself nor them. Seek help. Ignore them. Smile at their scowls. Live and you'll continue living. All it takes is one person, a toy, your parents, and you've got the motivation to go on. If you ever as much as make one person smile, you deserve to keep going"

He let his speech hover in the air for a full minute. I dropped my book.

He looked at me in the eyes "I'll be sixteen in August. And I don't know if I'm going to make it there"

Somehow, I didn't doubt it for a second.

Our lips met a second later.

I stared at myself in the mirror.

Brown, dull curly hair was around my shoulders. My nose was big, my eyes were small, my mouth was gross, and I was too skinny and too short.

But, as Percy, my boyfriend, looks at me in the mirror, he kisses my shoulder and tells me, softly "Beautiful"

The last day of school was ending, Percy came to see me.

His eyes were red, and he looked awful.

He kissed me for a full minute, then grabbed me by the shoulders and looked at me in the eye.

"I loved you" he said, slowly, and I knew this was a goodbye "But I'll probably never see you again. I'll possibly die on August. I want to thank you because you are amazing, and don't let them hurt you. Be with Tammy. Remember me, will you?"

We were both crying now. I dared to make another question "You love Annabeth and Rachel, don't you?"

He looked down "I also loved you, Miranda"

I nodded, tears pooling out of my eyes like I was drowning in my sorrows "Get them. Love them like you did with me. Make them get a bit of yourself, Perseus. Don't forget me, because I'll never forget you, but move on as quickly as you can. Choose whomever you want, but I know it's not me. So don't lie to me. I love you. And…well, when you're eighty, could you ever tell your grandchildren a story about a girl called Miranda? A fourteen year old with a problem?"

He nodded. I gave him one last kiss and left.

Twenty years later, I was alone on my house, and Erik, my three year old son, asked me "Mom, who is that man?"

I turned around, and gasped.

On my door, there was a man.

I knew him. He was Percy Jackson.

He had the same eyes, and his body was full of scars.

Daniel, my husband, came up behind me "Is there a problem?"

I shook his hand off my shoulder "Daniel, can you leave for a second? I need to talk to Perseus."

Percy smiled.

I insisted, and my husband and son left.

"So" he said "I'm back"

I smiled hesitantly "I named him Erik" I offered, meaning my son, because he was staring at him "You know, The Phantom of the Opera? I figured it was accurate. Beauty underneath and all that. Daniel, I met in college. I missed you" I told him "But I guess you didn't die. Who was it, Annabeth or Rachel?"

He smiled and hugged me "Annabeth" he whispered into my ear.

I shivered, "I am so glad you came, even if just for a second."

He pulled away "Yeah. I crawled out of hell to get back here"

Something in his voice told me it was true.

"I loved you" I telled him

"I loved you, too" he answered, a smile on his face. "I've got Hazel, Zoë and Michael. They're amazing. Two, three and five."

I nodded. "You're going to leave now, aren't you?"

"Yes. I just needed to say…you're beautiful Miranda, you do know that, don't you?"

I smiled "Oh, I know. And don't forget my promise."

He grinned "I'll never forget"

And Percy Jackson disappeared from my life.

Daniel didn't ask for details, and I was grateful.

I didn't feel like talking. I felt like dying.

"When I was young, yes, those were rough says, when I was young I met a boy called Perseus"

Martha and Jessica laughed "Poor guy. Whatta name"

Julie and Robert rolled their eyes. Erik just sat there, amused, with Christina (oh, the irony), from time to time kissing her blonde hair.

I continued "And he was wonderful"

"Was he handsome, Grandma?" asked Sophie

"Oh yes" I said, tears on my eyes, as Daniel smiled at me with little worry on his old eyes "He was handsome. Inside and out."

To This Day, I still remember Percy Jackson. To This Day, I still remember how cruel life can be. To This Day, I still remember how to find beauty underneath prejudice, steryotypes, and all that meaningless talk people decide it's an argument to insult people. To This Day, I still remember that not everything is given out to you. You have to fight. To This Day, I know that there is no good nor evil, but the mix in ourselves.

And if you can't see anything beautiful about yourself, get a better mirror, look a little closer, stare a little longer, because there's something inside you that made you keep trying despite everyone who told you to quit.

...

But our lives will only ever always continue to be a balancing act, that has less to do with pain... and more to do wit BEAUTY.

"To This Day" Project, read by Shane Koyczan.

*Belongs to John Green that one sentece.

Also, Phantom of the Opera mentions are to help you understand beauty is inside, and most likely will never be appreciated if you don't know how to control the rejection.

Please review, or don't, favorite, or don't. Do whatever you want, except make people feel bad. Thank you for reading.

-ChocolateIsMyDoom