Back by popular demand is the next installment of 'Letting the Ranger Have His Say' *cue fanfare* By the way, there is a minor spoiler for Erak's Ransom but aside from that I don't think there are any other ones :)
I was surprised at how popular the last one was, so I thought it was about time I did a sequel to it. In the last one I dealt with the strange tendency of the RA Fandom to enjoy beating up Will in fanfics (seriously, what is with that? I don't understand it myself and I do it!). In this one I intend to deal with an incredibly popular topic, the subject of much controversy, division and dissension. Shipping.
Will leaned back against the rough trunk of the tree, the knobled bark digging into his back but not unpleasantly so. Above the sun shone through the leaves casting a mixture of light and shadows onto his face. He just enjoyed the sensation and the soft, muted colours of green mixing with the soft blue of the sky and yellow of the sun. Since getting back from Skandia he hadn't had much time to just relax and think, first a whirlwind of activity at Castle Araluen and then Halt had plunged him into an unremitting scheme of hard work. Will was partly grateful for this, it kept his mind off the situation with him and Cassandra, and yet...
His thoughts trailed off and he sighed heavily, feeling incredibly confused about the whole situation. The young ranger's thoughts was interupted as he heard a familiar, gentle voice call his name, carried to him on the warm summer's breeze.
"Will!"
He looked up and felt a strange jumping sensation in his chest as he saw Alyss walking towards him. She was wearing her white courier's dress which accentuated her slim, elegant figure and her long, blonde hair was loose and seemed to glow in the mid-day light.
Cassandra: Why?
Author: *sigh* Again? Guys why? Trying to write a fanfic here.
Cassandra: Why do we have to put up with these long sentences describing how oh-so perfect Alyss is. I get it. She has a great figure and an annoyingly pretty voice.
Author: Well...I...
Cassandra: How come never goes on about how beautiful I am or how I have a 'slim, elegant figure'?
Author: Don't we?
Cassandra: *haughty stare* Nope.
Author: So...
Cassandra: Write.
Evanlyn gazed off into the distance, not really seeing the mangnificent view provided from Castle Araluen's battlements. It had been two weeks since she, Halt and Horace had returned from Skandia and she hadn't really had much time to just be still and think about all that had happened.
And Will.
Especially Will.
She sighed and frowned pensively to herself, realizing that her feelings for him hadn't changed. She wasn't entirely sure what these feelings were if she was honest with herself. But she knew that she did have feelings for him. And not just as a friend...
"Evanlyn?" said a familiar voice behind her.
She whirled around to see a red-faced Will standing at the doorway behind her, "Er..I-I-I mean Cassandra, Princess Cassandra," he gave an awkward bow, his face going an even deeper shade of red.
"Will," she smiled broadly and went over to him, "It's great to see you."
Will mumbled a reply looking increasingly embarrassed. He took a deep breath and looked her in the eye.
"I never really said thank-you," he said.
Cassandra tilted her head to one side, "Thank-you? For what."
"For saving my life."
Cassandra blinked and looked at Will, he was staring intently at her, the red flame of embarrassment had dissapeared from his cheek, Cassandra felt her breath hitch and little and wondered why her heart was beating so fast.
"Will," she said gently, "you don't need to thank me."
"But I do," he stepped forward and gently took her hands in his, a slight grin tugged at one side of his mouth, "And I never got to say how I really felt..."
Cassandra tried not to gulp, "Felt?" she asked.
"About you," he finished, smiling.
He slowly leaned in towards Cassandra
Alyss: WELL, EXCUSE ME!
Author: Wha...
Alyss: Will is MY boyfriend.
Author: Bu...
Alyss: MINE.
Cassandra: Honestly Alyss, you suck the joy out of everything, it's just a fanfic.
Alyss: Well, I'm sorry princess but I do seem to recall you having a few problems with a certain fanfic earlier...
Cassandra: *tension*
Alyss: *tension*
Author: Why do you guys always do this! I just want to write a decent fanfic to satisfy the cravings of rabid fangirls (and boys).
Alyss: Maybe you should do it without pairing up the Princess here with MY BOYFRIEND!
Cassandra: primly As I recall, Alyss, Will wasn't your boyfriend at this point in the series.
Will: That is a good point.
Alyss: STAY OUT OF THIS WILL
Horace: How come girls never fight over me?
Will: Because I'm me and your you.
Horace: What's that supposed to mean?
Will: Urm...well...
Cassandra: Anyway, if Alyss gets to be shipped with lots of different people I feel like I should be entitled to as well.
Alyss: You will leave Will alone, he is mine.
Cassandra: This is the world of fanfictions, anything is possible.
Alyss: Clearly, because you getting all the guys would never happen really.
Horace: Ooooohhhh
Will: Burn!
Author: *dives for cover*
*cue catfight between Alyss and Cassandra*
Horace: Seeing as they are busy, could you do one for me? I would love to have girls fighting over me. Will always gets the girls and it's a bit boring...
Will: I don't think it's boring.
Horace: C'mon...
Author: Well...
Horace: *narrows eyes and places hand on the hilt of his sword*
Author: Let's get started!
The two horses thundered across the turf towards one another, kicking up clouds of dust and breathing heavily. On their backs were two knights, both dressed in full battle armour, gleaming in the gentle spring sunlight. In one arm they each bore a shield, in the other a jousting javelin. As they neared one another, the tall javelins came down to point at one another and they met with a crash.
There was a smatter of applause and cheers from the small crowd of castle staff and dignatries who had gathered to watch the training exercise. The victor saluted his opponent who returned the gesture the lauged and fliped back his helmet.
"Well done, Horace," boomed Sir Rodney, looking quite delighted he had been bested by his student.
Horace took off his helmet and patted Kicker, looking somewhat bashful, "Thank-you, sir, but I would say you deserve the thanks seeing as you're the one who taught me."
Redmont Fief's Battlemaster beamed, the young man before him had grown up to be a fine knight in every sense of the word.
Alyss: Wait...you aren't shipping Horace and Rod-
Author: No! Why would I do that?
Alyss: Well, I know what you fangirls are like...
Horace: *confused* What has this got to do with ships?
*silence*
Cassandra: I'll tell you when you're older, sweetie.
Author: Could I maybe carry on by any chance?
Horace: *galantly* of course.
Author: *angrily mutters to self*
"Well," he said, "I think we will call that a day with regard to your jousting training."
The two saluted formally to one another again and dismounted, two stable hands quickly running up to take their mounts. Horace looked around to see the small crowd, some had dispersed, going back to their business but a few remained.
A few very attractive individuals.
Horace made his way over to them, an affable smile on his face. He absently flicked a lock of hair out of his face drawing a few muted giggles from the assembled group.
"Hello, Horace," smiled Cassandra, Horace grinned at her, she looked very pretty day, wearing a loose, green dress which brought out the green shades of her eyes.
"Hello, Cassandra," he responded.
"That was a fine bit of jousting," she commented, flicking a few stray strands of hair over her shoulder, "you should really consider entering the yearly jousting tournament up at Castle Araluen, it is where all the finest knights compete."
Horace nodded thoughtfully, a jousting tournament, the company of Cassandra, a very pretty young woman; there were a lot of benefits.
"So, are you joining us for dinner then?" asked another person from the small group. The young man in question looked at the person speaking, instantly recognizing her voice, the beautiful young trainee Courier he had grown up with: Alyss.
Cassandra: Whoa. Hold up there. This is supposed to be about me and Horace.
Author: My instructions were: a fanfiction with girls fighting over Horace. That's is what I am trying to do.
Cassandra: *narrows eyes at Horace* Well, I would prefer it if you didn't.
Alyss: *smugly* See, it isn't nice is it Princess?
*tension increases once more*
Will: *oblivious* That's an intersting point actually. Why aren't there more fanfics with Horace and Cassandra?
Horace: That's true, I mean, if I wrote fanfics I would write about Cassandra and me all the time.
Cassandra: *soppily* Aww, thanks pumpkin.
Horace: *soppily* You're welcome my little muffincake.
*silence*
Alyss: That's why.
Autor: *sighs* So fanfictions without Horace being shipped with anyone other than Cassandra...
Cassandra: *flatly* Yes.
Author: Great...
Will placed his elbows on his knees and leaned forward, gazing thoughtfully off into the woods. He had been apprenticed to Halt for some time now and it was nearing the end of his apprenticeship. The two had grown quite close-
Halt: WHOA! Let me just stop you right there!
Will: Urm..yes...please do.
Author: Can't please anyone at the moment can I?
Halt: I am like a FATHER to Will. A FATHER. I am MARRIED.
Author: Well-
Halt: Nope.
Will: Noppity nope.
Horace: *confused* What's the matter? I didn't even get to find out whether this was going to be one of those angsty fics where Will gets shot and then he and Alyss get all lovey-dovey.
Erak: Aww, yeah, those ones are cute.
Author: Where did you- nevermind.
Horace: I don't get it!
Halt: Now for one last time. No. Slash.
Horace: What is slash!?
Author: C'mon Halt, it's just a fanfic...
Erak: Hey! How comes I don't get paired up with anyone?
Author: Urm..well...
Erak: Just because I am perceived as being an ugly and unhygenic Skandain it doesn't mean I should be deprived of love! I mean there is 1.6K fanfictions and yet only one of them actually ships me with someone else and it hasn't been updated in THREE YEARS.
Will: *gently* It's not real Erak.
Erak: *runs a finger along the edge of his battleaxe* DON'T MAKE ME GO BESERKER!
Author: *sigh* Here we go...*to self* This is why no-one ships Erak...
Erak strolled around the grounds of Castle Redmont whistling to himself, they were here on offical business to renew the treaty between Skandia and Araluen. Erak needed to take a break from all the formalities though, he was still a wild sea dog in his heart and missed just being free to raid as he pleased, though, he did admit secretly, there were certain perks to being Oberjarl, the taxes for one. People paying you money because you sat in a larger chair than everyone else? Brilliant!
"Why, hello Oberjarl Erak."
The Oberjarl turned around to see Lady Pauline standing behind him, a slight smile on her face. He cleared his throat, feeling himself flush red, "M'lady," he said, sweeping a slightly awkward bow.
She laughed lightly and very pleasantly, thought Erak, and moved towards him, "Ah, don't worry about formalities with me Oberjarl," gently, she said, "Just call me Pauline."
Halt: WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?
Author: Ooops...maybe I should've thought that one through.
Will: Ew. What? Ew.
Alyss: So much nope.
Cassandra: I agree.
Horace: *wails* I DON'T UNDERSTAND!
Erak: *looking pleased with himself*
Halt: WIPE THAT GRIN OFF YOUR FACE. THAT'S MY WIFE.
Erak: What? Nothing happened.
Halt: *roars* YOU'D BETTER BELIEVE IT! *turns to Author*
Author: *whimpers*
Halt: *is menancing*
Author: *is frightened*
Erak: *continues to look pleased with himself*
Halt: *snarls* Wipe that grin off your face Oberjarl, before I do it for you.
Erak: *smirks*
*cue fightscene*
Will: And now we should let a modest veil fall over these violent scenes for the convenience of the audience and in order to prevent our rating soaring to an M.
Author: 'Our raiting?' This is my fanfic!
Alyss: Clearly not.
Author: *rage quit*
So..not as good as the first half I feel, but I wanted to try it and see how it goes. If you have any requests for another issue I should just or just general fanfic ideas feel free to ask me, either PM or in the review. It could take me a long time to get around to doing it but I'll give it a shot anyways :D
Actually, now I've written that I feel like Erak does deserve to be paired up with someone, preferably an axe-weilding, backside-kicking, tough, hardcore woman. That would be good.