Right from the start
You were a thief
You stole my heart
And I your willing victim
I let you see the parts of me
That weren't all that pretty
And with every touch you fixed them

Now you've been talking in your sleep, oh, oh
Things you never say to me, oh, oh
Tell me that you've had enough
Of our love, our love

Just give me a reason
Just a little bit's enough
Just a second we're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again
It's in the stars
It's been written in the scars on our hearts
We're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again

Just Give Me a Reason:- Pink

He'd never been through something like this before. There was so much waiting involved. Was that normal? Was it normal for the nurses to pass them by and give them such sad looks? What the hell did that even mean, anyway? All he wanted was a simple answer. Was his friend alive or not? Was he going to hear the worst possible news or the best? He was tired but he couldn't sleep. He'd heard nothing of the voice since his revelation in the hallway and he was grateful for the peace and quiet that came with the respite.

One thing at a time though.

Both Juliet and Gus were asleep by the time any real news came through for the impatient group. Shawn had been staring blankly at the clock out of boredom, his eyes almost crossing at one point when footsteps had echoed along the hallway outside for the first time in almost two hours. He'd stiffened with anticipation, accidentally nudging Juliet who had been dozing with her head on his shoulder. She'd blinked awake with a snuffle, groaning at the various kinks and pains that shot along her spine. Shawn motioned for her to wake Gus and she did, leaning over to shake his shoulder roughly just as the door opened. The surgeon looked just as exhausted as they were and he was still in his scrubs from surgery by the looks of it. While he tried to ignore what was possibly his friend's blood spattered on the hideous green material, Shawn eyed him closely, trying to work out if the look on his face meant good or bad news.

For once, his skills for reading people were useless because this man was a closed book. No ticks, no shakes, no twitches. He'd be a damn good poker player if the situation ever arose and Shawn couldn't believe that this was what he was thinking while on the brink of receiving life changing news. Shaking himself out of it, he waited patiently for Gus to gather himself and fully wake up, seeing as the Valium was still working on his body and he was groggy. Shawn passed him a cup of water as they all stood up. He wondered why people always did that when a Doctor came into the room with news. Maybe it was a respect thing, he didn't know. He didn't really care either.

It seemed like a silly thing to be focusing on at the moment but he couldn't help himself. All of these stupid, uninteresting thoughts were running through his head and he couldn't shake them off. Why didn't hospitals have Wi-Fi for example? Maybe it was because of the machines he supposed... Fuck, his mind was racing with utter rubbish. He desperately hoped he wasn't on the verge of another breakdown. He didn't need that right now. Juliet was digging the heels of her hands against her eyes to try and wake herself up. She'd barely been sleeping for an hour against him before the Doctor had turned up at long last.

They were all so exhausted that standing up straight seemed like a chore. "I'll take it that you're Miss Armen's family?" the man finally spoke up in a deep baritone that should have made Shawn feel reassured.

It didn't.

When neither Shawn or Gus spoke, Juliet jumped in for them to stop them looking like idiots. "Well, not technically family. Her mother and father are flying out as soon as they can get a flight. We're her friends... Is she okay?" she trailed off rather awkwardly, realizing that the man had been looking for a simple 'yes' or 'no' and not their life story. She couldn't help it. She talked a lot when she was nervous. He'd noticed that about her. While he found it adorable, now wasn't the time to be fawning over his girlfriend's cute traits. So he squeezed her hand instead and waited for the answer they'd been desperate for.

"Well, I have both good news and bad news concerning her current condition."

He gave them a pointed look as though he wanted to know what they wanted to hear first but they were all too tired to play games at this point, so Shawn just let out a frustrated noise and the man continued instead of waiting for further instruction. "Well, at the moment, the good news is that she's out of surgery and we managed to repair most of the damage that the bullet did." That was good news. The knot of tension between his shoulder blades eased a little, but they all knew that it wasn't as simple as that. It never was.

Shawn braced himself for the bad news that was going to follow. He suddenly wished he'd spoken up earlier and asked for the bad news first because now all they could cling to was the fact that at least she was alive. There were so many things that could be worse than death. She could need help breathing for the rest of her life. She could have been paralyzed or be in a coma for all they knew. Just because she was alive didn't mean she was safe just yet. His stomach churned and he heard a whisper race through his head. He ignored it bravely and went back to focusing on the Doctor.

"Now, it's time for the bad news I'm afraid. I think you should probably take a seat for this," the older man said softly and motioned to the uncomfortable plastic chairs that they'd been occupying for the last several hours.

As much as they didn't want to, they all sat heavily. The air in the room was tense and was making Shawn feel sick to his stomach.

It made for difficult breathing and he could feel his chest tighten worryingly. This was how a panic attack usually started but Juliet clutched his hand almost too tightly and it meant that he could keep a level head for a little while. Gus was looking as though he was going to pass out too and Shawn wanted to comfort him some more, but he was too far away and his body seemed to be made of lead. He couldn't move or focus on anything but the Doctor's face. "I'm not going to tip-toe around the fact that this is a very dangerous period of wait and see that we're going through. I can't lie to you. She's lost a lot of blood- and I mean a lot of blood. These next few hours are critical to whether or not she'll pull through."

There was more silence as the news sank in, slowly and painfully like a knife between the ribs. Shawn fisted a hand in his hair and stood up suddenly and loudly, spinning away from any touches or stares and facing out of the window to hide the horror on his face. The Doctor seemed unfazed by his reaction. He probably saw this day after day. He heard Juliet ask softly, "So, what are her chances?" in a very small voice. The awkward question that they'd all been avoiding up until now. He tensed again and he could feel the muscles in his shoulders going into spasm but he didn't care.

"Being generous, I'm willing to put it at fifty-fifty at this exact moment. But, if she can make it past nine o'clock which is about four hours away," he motioned to the clock on the wall next to them. "Then her chances should start to improve. I'm sorry I couldn't give you better news but this was all I had. We lost her once on the operating table but thankfully her heart started beating again. She's strong and we're all hoping that she'll make it. I'm sorry this had to happen to you kids..." When no-one replied, he gave a swift nod of understanding. They wanted to have some privacy to take everything in. "Look, I'll leave you alone for a while but I'll be back if there are any changes in her status."

His chair squeaked horribly on the lino and he cleared his throat as he left the room, leaving the door swinging behind him. Shawn leaned his head against the cold glass of the window and stared along the hallway. He was watching a family, very different to theirs just along the way. They were crying, distraught almost with grief. They hadn't gotten the news they'd wanted either. His eyes filled with sorrow as he watched them cling to each other while a nurse attempted to herd them all somewhere so they could grieve in privacy.

Would that be them in a few short hours of she didn't wake up?

How could people go out there and actually point a gun at someone, then have the nerve to pull the trigger? Didn't they know that it was a human being they were about the murder? That the person on the receiving end of that bullet had a family and friends who loved them? They weren't just about to destroy one life but many. Who could live with themselves after doing something like that? You couldn't just pull someone's world to the ground and go home to sleep soundly at night. He rested his forehead against the window. The kid down the hallway can't have been more than seven, clinging to his crying mother's leg and not really understanding what was going on. Poor guy was probably wondering where his dad was...

Shawn swallowed the lump that rose in his throat, feel tears burn the corners of his eyes. He heard his girlfriends chair move as she got up to comfort him. Juliet pulled him away from the window by the hand, stroking his cheek with her fingertips and tracing his cheekbone soothingly. Looking at those warm blue eyes, he shuddered at the thought of anything like this happening to her. To his Juliet. He would kill anyone who came near her and he knew it. That instinct deep down to protect what he loved told him that he would take a million bullets for her.

"It's not fair," he muttered softly at first while she comforted him. He was so angry at the world and it showed on his face, flashed through his eyes as his brow furrowed with anxiety.

"I know baby. I know..." she soothed, her voice filled with understanding while she kept him as calm as she could.

"No, no! It's not fair," he protested, trying to push her away weakly. What if something happened to her? To Gus? How could anyone know the fear he felt? He didn't even have the strength left in his bones to fight properly but he could feel the fire in his belly, feel the tingle of rage creep along his spine. He wanted to hit something, wanted to find the lowlife who had gunned his friend down and slam his fist into him again and again. He wanted to scream at him that he'd been getting better, his life had been going so well until that bastard had pulled the trigger and threatened to tear it all down.

He struggled against Juliet's firm grip, trying to get away for a moment so that he wouldn't hurt her in his anger. He wanted to punch a wall and scream and shout and ask why shit like this kept happening to them. What was so special about them in particular? They were good people despite their appearances. They didn't murder or steal or break the law. They just kept to themselves in their own little corner of the world, nice and private. Away from other people and the cruelty of the world. Why did they deserve more pain on top of all that they'd had? From being unable to pay the bills and the voices in his head, to having people they helped turn on them and bite them in the ass when they least expected it.

How was that fair? It wasn't. So he kept saying it. Kept justifying his anger because no-one should have to deal with this much shit in the space of one life. Juliet pulled him against her roughly as his struggling ceased, his face buried into her neck and his big arms embracing her in return as he finally accepted her comfort. "Not fair," he blubbered, his shoulders shaking and her hand drawing gentle circles over the expanse of his back. He gave up fighting her comforting grasp and fell into it instead, his body sagging in her arms as all of his strength finally evaporated and left him.

"Shhh love. I know it's not fair," she stroked his hair and when she led him back to the seats that they weren't leaving until they got more news, he promptly fell asleep against her. The exhaustion finally took over and he let it engulf him, his head lolling against her shoulder like hers had not an hour before. He was so tired.

So very, very tired of fighting.

It was eleven o'clock, two hours of knife edge tension, before more news finally reached them. Shawn had managed to sleep for a while, albeit restlessly because he'd tossed and turned on the makeshift bed that they'd created out of plastic chairs. His whole body ached and he could tell that his beautiful Juliet wasn't doing much better. She winced with nearly every movement she made and she groaned loudly, arching her back so that every vertebrae popped. He reached out, placing a hand the small of her back and managing a strained smile that didn't reach his eyes. She leaned over and kissed his cheek just as Gus arrived back from the coffee machine for the sixth time that night. He passed out the cups he'd brought back and they thanked him, sleep making their voices thick and weary.

"Anyone heard anything while I was away?" he asked, suppressing a yawn of his own. Shawn shook his head, pushing his unruly hair from his eyes as he stood.

"Nothing. I mean, what's taking so long? I thought they would come and get us at nine like they said... Maybe something happened," he groaned at the thought of more worry arriving, but Juliet stopped the thought dead with a small hand on the back of his neck to ease him. He was grateful. He probably wouldn't be holding up this well if she hadn't have been there with him. He was going to repay her when it was all over. He was going to give her everything she'd ever dreamed of because she more than deserved it. He would give her a palace if he could; give her her a mansion with a fucking unicorn if she asked for it.

More importantly though, he was going to take her home and make love to her for as long as they wanted to. If this had taught him even one measly little lesson, it was to live for the moment- because you might not be here to make the most of it again. So, he was going to stop being so scared of fucking up and he was going to make sure she felt every single emotion he felt for her. Every feeling of love and adoration. He was done wasting time. She was still playing with the hairs on the base of his skull as she stared out of the window in thought and she didn't expect the deep kiss he pulled her into. He teased her mouth open with his tongue, meeting hers as she gave a surprised moan into him. If it hadn't been for Gus's uncomfortable coughing fit, he might not have been able to stop. She didn't ask him why he'd had the sudden urge to kiss her senseless all of a sudden because she could read him like a book an she knew why already.

So he kissed the side of her head and turned away to walk away.

It was just as he made it over to the door, that a small, very busy looking nurse burst through the door in a no-nonsense fashion, almost taking him off his feet with the heavy wood as she arrived. She seemed unconcerned with the fact that she'd almost killed him with a door and instead stood in front of Juliet and promptly handed her a piece of paper to sign. Juliet took the pen from her while throwing confused glances at the men at the same time. They were both as clueless as she was and they shrugged behind the little woman's back.

She must have noticed their bewilderment. "Just a few insurance forms that we need a signature for. Miss Armen is awake now and she asked that I give them to the 'sensible looking one'. Her words exactly," she smiled and even though it didn't quite fit her face, it was the most reassuring smile they'd seen all night long. The tension was sucked out of the room as everyone simultaneously sagged in relief. So she was awake and making jokes apparently. If she made the thing into a giant joke then Shawn would kill her himself he swore silently. This wasn't funny and she better not just act like nothing had happened. "I'm sure you've all been kept waiting quite long enough. We're sorry for the delay of any news but there are only five nurses on staff this morning and we've been rushed off of our feet as you can see," she motioned to her once neat hair that was falling out of the bun and her tired eyes.

"We're just worried about our friend..." Juliet explained softly, and the woman nodded in understanding. She was much nicer than the Doctor who had told them about Chloe all those hours ago. His bedside manner could have used a lot of work. "Can we see her?" she continued tentatively and the nurse deliberated for a moment, checking the chart in her hand before making a humming sound as she went over the figures on the page.

"She'd been in and out of consciousness which is understandable because of the pain medication, but she's a little more alert than she was an hour ago. She's out of any immediate danger as we speak but we do need to keep an eye on any changes in her vitals. It'll be a while before she'll be allowed to leave and a bit longer before she'll be back to her normal self. I'll ask that you don't stay too long and try to keep the conversation away from anything that will cause distress," she explained, keeping her tone firm but reassuring.

All the small group really heard out of the whole conversation was that yes, they could see her now.

Gus was the first through the door, even before the nurse and he had to mutter an apology for almost pushing her out of they way seeing as he didn't actually know what ward she was in. The nurse gave him a concerned look but carried on, keeping up a quick pace that they practically had to jog to keep up with. Shawn could feel relief coursing through him and the from the way Juliet squeezed his hand as they walked, he could tell she was just as glad to have received a bit of good news after such a horrible nights wait. They followed along every twist and turn in the long winding hallways, past endless wards and up what seemed like a thousand stairs because the lifts were occupied. Shawn realized with some surprise that it was indeed daylight outside now.

He kept forgetting that it was eleven in the morning, his thoughts still with the night time they'd left behind. It felt like an eternity before they were standing outside of the private room that held Chloe inside. The nurse gave them a quick nod and motioned for them to head on inside. There was no time like the present after all. Shawn went in first because Gus was suddenly reluctant and Juliet pushed him forwards instead.

The room was bright in contrast to the blue blankets on the bed but Chloe stood out, pale and weak in the center of a mass of pillows. She raised a hand weakly in greeting when he wandered inside, a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth at the sight of her friend. Shawn was terrified. He'd never seen her like this before. She looked so fragile, so different from the leather wearing, loud mouthed badass that she usually was by day. He was so used to her being the strong one, the one to tell him to pull himself together. As Juliet and Gus finally followed him, they all stood in awkward silence as she stared back at them. "You all look like you've seen a ghost. Do I look that bad?" she joked quietly and the tension dissolved instantly. She was still the same rough person inside as she always had been.

They didn't hesitate after that, moving forwards to the seats that had been set out for them, Juliet grabbing one hand and Shawn taking the other while Gus stayed at the foot of the bed. Chloe even had the strength to look amused at their behavior. "H-how do you feel?" Shawn asked tentatively, scared in case he didn't like the answer.

"Like I was shot," she croaked, her throat dry and her mouth feeling icky after the anesthetic. Juliet poured a little water into a plastic cup and helped her drink. She was grateful and told her so. "Thanks. Feel like I've been eating sandpaper..." she informed them, making a face. "When can I go home?" Her next question was a little more difficult for them to answer. Juliet glanced at Gus and then at her boyfriend, who was staring awkwardly at the covers on the bed, not meeting anyone's eyes. She answered for them.

"The Doctor's said it might not be for a while. The damage was pretty serious," she said and Chloe looked pained, more so than she had when they arrived the first time. She didn't comment on it though, her eyes focusing on Gus again. She seemed confused that he was keeping his distance a little bit. He clearly didn't want to get too close.

"Hey man. Sorry I bled all over you," she motioned gently to his clothes. Gus looked like he was going to cry when she spoke and ever the one for sensing the problem, Chloe knew right away what was wrong with him. He'd been quiet as could be in the waiting room, while Shawn and Juliet had tried to keep the conversation going to fill in the hours ahead of them at the time. She narrowed her eyes a little bit and Shawn was pleased to see a little of her old self creep back onto her weak face. "Burton Guster, don't you dare blame yourself for what happened to me." Chloe used more energy in that sentence that she had, but it didn't slow her down at all.

"I should have gone out with the money. It was my job and I was too busy reading stupid comic books to be bothered," he choked up, unable to meet anyone's eye. Shawn looked at him with sorrow on his face. Gus blamed himself even though he could never have known something like this would happen. He must have kept quiet around he and Juliet in case they pointed the finger of blame at him and wished for him to be here instead of Chloe. Like they ever would.

"Gus, shut up. It's not your fault that some drug addled jack ass decided now was a great time to rob someone at gunpoint. It's even less of your fault that I told him where to go instead of just handing over the money like the big mouth I am. So, if you keep up the blame game, I'm afraid I'm going to have to kill you. As long as you promise to come over here and hold my arms up for me while I choke you to death," she smirked. Gus's bottom lip trembled as he finally squeezed her hand softly. She squeezed back before glancing at Shawn properly for the first time. "What about you Spencer? Holding up okay? If he gets out of line Juliet, just pull his hair. He's like a little girl about his hair."

"Stop joking please," Shawn asked softly, his eyes shutting because just this once, he wanted her to take it seriously. He wanted her to acknowledge the fact that she'd almost died on them. That she had died once on the operating table. Chloe sighed tiredly and Shawn could see that the conversation was beginning to take it's toll on her.

"Can you guys wait outside please? I need to have a talk with Shawn," she asked, motioning to Juliet and Gus. They nodded right away, Juliet kissing Shawn goodbye before leading Gus out of the door and shutting it behind her. Shawn wondered what there was to talk about, seeing as she wasn't going to admit how close she'd been to death. But he would talk all she wanted because it was good to hear the sound of her voice.

Chloe waited for the click that resounded through the room before making a pained face as she pushed herself up a little bit more. The pillows shifted and Shawn reached out to help her but she batted him away impatiently. She was going to be such a fun patient for the nurses to deal with. He could see it now. "Okay, talk to me Spencer. You seem like you're holding up much better than I thought you would to be honest. Something is bugging you though and it's not the hole through my stomach, it it?" she patted his hand, drawing a sigh from him as he shook his head. He was doing better than he'd been giving himself credit for apparently but she could see through him as easily as she always could. He finally tore his eyes away from the scratchy woolen bed covers to meet her gaze.

"I'm okay."

"Stubborn jackass," was her reply. He shook his head, lips twitching. "You and I are so much alike you know. A bit battered and a bit bruised but still good deep down inside. When you look at yourself in the mirror Shawn, you see all these things that you think are wrong with you and those voices in your head torment you day and night. But look at me," she requested when his eyes fell again. He did as she said. "They're wrong Shawn and they'll always be wrong because you are a good man. I refuse to believe any different. If you'd have been there today I know for a fact that you would have taken that damned bullet for me because that's the type of guy you are and if anyone ever tries to make you believe anything else, I'll kill them," she squeezed his hand and he nodded.

"I know you would. I know," he whispered. "I know I'm going to get a little stupid here but... you're like my big sister aren't you? Always have been. I wish I'd had someone like you there when I was growing up. You've always had my back. With those assholes at the bar and with people who belittled me or made me feel like crap. You've never made me feel like an idiot or like I wasn't worth anything."

"Then you should know that I'm not going anywhere just yet," she motioned to her bullet wound. "I still have a brother to look after right? Because no matter what Shawn, I'm always going to be behind you and I promise that I will never not be there to help you up when you fall."

He choked out a laugh through the hot tears on his cheeks. "I- I'm getting better Chloe. Aren't I? I'm really getting better."

"Yeah, you are kid. You really are. All because of her," her eyes flickered towards the windows where Juliet and Gus stood with their backs to them as they gave them some privacy. She smiled wide and while it was strained because of the pain from her gut, it reached her eyes and made her face warm. Warmer than he'd ever seen it before. Shawn found himself smiling as well as he watched his beautiful girlfriend through the window for a moment, the silence around them only broken by the steady beep of machines.

It was a few long minutes before Chloe found the energy to speak again but Shawn could tell her strength was waning and she heading towards unconsciousness again. He wouldn't stay much longer so she could get some proper rest. "So, before I kick you out and sleep for the next week, I want to ask you something."

"I'm not sneaking you any booze in," he immediately stopped that train of thought and she managed a chuckle, however quiet it was.

"Nothing like that, I promise. I'm not quite that bad yet," they laughed together because they both knew that the rule would be broken at some point during her stay. "Nah. I want to ask you about that amazing woman you have out there. That girl is the best damn thing that has ever happened to you Shawn Spencer. I've never met anyone like her. They way she talks about you is so... so full of adoration and love that it actually made me choke up a little. I was glad when you interrupted us that day when we were making cocktails, because I was about to crack. The way she speaks about you, you would think that you made the sun just for her in a tool shed." Chloe didn't look away from Juliet as she spoke and Shawn swallowed as he listened.

"I don't think I even need to mention the way you look at her. That speaks for itself doesn't it? So you listen to me and you'd better listen well because I know that sometimes I don't give the best advice and sometimes I take the piss, but- you're the man that any woman would be proud to call hers and you're the man that I'm so fucking proud that I can call my little brother. Take my advice. You need to keep that girl forever. You need to hold onto her and never let her go because she is the best thing that has ever happened to you. Look at you, how far you've come in just a few weeks because she believed in you. Treat her well and make sure you tell her you love her every damn day. Take her home and make love to her. Marry her and have kids. Grow old together and hold hands on your front porch. Maybe that bullet knocked some sense into me because I don't know why I've never told you this before. Promise me Shawn, right here and right now. You promise me."

He didn't even blink as he looked her dead in the eye. "I promise." He wiped his damp cheeks with the back of his sleeve as she relaxed back into the mountain of pillows that were holding her up. She may have looked small to him when he'd first arrived but now- now she looked like she could take on the world and win.

"Good boy. Now get out there and go home. Sleep, take a shower and eat something before you waste away. I'm sure Juliet can help you with the showering and sleeping part as well," she winked and he rolled his eyes happily. How she even had the strength to joke he would never know. "Keep the club closed for a few days until we get ourselves straightened out okay? I'll be able to think a little straighter when I'm not doped to the eyeballs with painkillers," she smirked as her eyelids drooped a bit. Shawn pushed his chair out, not daring to disobey an order like that. He leaned forward and before she could protest, pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

He'd always wanted a big sister and he supposed he could do a lot worse than someone who would gladly take a bullet for him. He looked out of the window at Juliet and Gus, who were still waiting patiently in the hallway for him to return. This was what he'd always wanted. A family. That's what they were, no matter how dysfunctional they appeared to the outside world. They didn't need to outside world when they had each other.

He bid her goodbye just as she was dozing off and he slipped out quietly into the hallway, Before Juliet could say a word to him though, he'd swept her up into his arms in a bear hug to rival all hugs. He buried his face into her neck, pressing his lips to her sweet skin and simply melting into her taste and her smell. He loved her so much and for the first time since he'd met her, he felt like he actually deserved her. Her arms wound around his neck as she hummed contentedly against him, body curved against his bigger frame.

"I love you baby," he muttered against her and a breathy gasp escaped her lips because he'd never said that to her before. "You're the most precious thing I have and..." he pulled back a little to cup her face in his hands. "I'm never letting you go." Her smile could have lit up the whole hospital and then some. Gus didn't even have the heart to clear his throat and ruin the romantic moment. Juliet leaned forwards and kissed her boyfriend, not caring in the slightest that anyone could walk by and see them. She poured everything she had into it, lips slanted against his.

When she pulled back, leaving him breathless, her forehead rested against his warmly. "I love you too Shawn." He pulled her back into him. He was never going to stop telling her now that they'd both admitted it. He would tell her for the next thousand years and then the thousand years after that as well. Forever.

From inside the private room, head against the cool pillows, Chloe smiled contentedly.

A/N: Ehem... remember me guys? Heh... I can't apologize enough for how long this has taken me to put up but I was sort of out exploring the world! Yeah, for the last month and a half I've been with my mates in various places, living it up and seeing a load of wonderful crap before I go back to college in September! I turned twenty-one a few weeks back and I'm just home for a week before I take off again for another little while. But fear not! This time, my laptop is going with me because I swear to God, I had withdrawal symptoms last time, ha!

I was going to finish the one-shot for NAPOS first, but I figured this one had been left for far too long and decided to get this one out first. Next chapter will be the last and yes, there will be that long awaited smut because you guys are certainly owed some right?

Thanks so much for sticking with me all this way, you wonderful lot. What would I do without you?

Reviews are like almost getting hit by a car in Paris. Exhilarating and terrifying all at the same bloody time!