Don't Want an Ending

Kendall sighed as he leaned against the old slightly rusted railing before him. He clasped his hands together in front of him as he looked out over the park. He was standing on top of the hill in the park that over looked most of the park below. He was thinking about tonight. It was going to be a very long night.

"Ken."

Kendall turned around and saw, his boyfriend; Logan Mitchell, standing a few feet away from him. Logan was perfect with his brown hair and eyes and flawless face. He was smiling as he looked at the blonde. Kendall returned the smile and turned around. He had to put on a smile. He needed Logan to think he was happy. He needed this night to be just right.

"Hey Logie," Kendall said leaning back against the railing. He smiled as he rested his arms on the railing that was now behind him. Logan walked over to him pecked him on the lips. He then rested his arms on the railing looking out at the park like Kendall had been doing just seconds ago.

"Why'd you want to meet here?" Logan asked curiously.

"I just want one more day where we can pretend and then we can get on with our lives," Kendall said simply.

"This isn't good bye, Kendall," Logan said.

"I like the memories this place has," Kendall said changing the subject. He turned around again and looked down into the park once more.

Kendall looked over at Logan. His heart broke at the sight before him. Not because Logan was sad or anything, no the opposite was true. Logan was smiling and happier than he had been in a long time. His heart broke, because this was going to be the last time he was going to get to see Logan for a long time. Logan was going off to college while Kendall had to stay behind. He still had two years of high school to complete. He was waiting for Logan to show up so they could have one last night together. Logan would be leaving tomorrow morning.

Kendall was wondering around the park. He had to get out for a bit. He had been home all day and it was boring. His sister Katie was out with her friends and his mother was at work. Sometimes Kendall hated summer. He really hated it when he was new in town and didn't have any friends.

Kendall sighed as he looked down at the path before him. The park wasn't too busy. He didn't mind. He liked the quiet.

"Whoa! heads up!" a voice yelled.

Kendall's head snapped up and he saw a brunette on a skateboard heading towards him. He seemed a bit out of control. Before Kendall could register what was going on, they collided. Kendall fell to the ground.

"I am so sorry," the skateboarder said quickly as he scrambled up. Kendall sat up and looked at him.

"I'm sorry, I wasn't paying attention," Kendall said.

"Totally my fault, I wasn't in control," the skateboarder said quickly. He stood up and helped Kendall up. "You new around here? I don't think I've seen you before," he said looking at Kendall. Kendall wasn't sure if he was checking him out or looking for a cut somewhere.

"Yeah, my family just moved in not that far from here," Kendall said nodding his head.

"Cool, I'm Logan by the way," Logan said.

"Kendall," Kendall said smiling.

"You're not hurt from the fall are you?" Logan asked looking the blonde over again.

"Nah, I've taken worse on the ice," Kendall said waving his hand.

"You play hockey?" Logan asked. Kendall nodded his head.

"Me too, I'm on my school's team," Logan said, "will you be going to Sherwood High?" he asked. Kendall nodded his head again. "Cool. You gonna be what a Sophomore?"

"No," Kendall said shaking his head.

"Junior?" Logan asked slowly.

"Freshman," Kendall said.

"You're only gonna be a freshman?" Logan asked shocked. Kendall looked down at his feet and nodded his head. "Wow, I thought you were older," he said.

"I get that a lot," Kendall said nodding his head.

"I will be a junior, I will be glad to show you around once school starts," Logan offered.

"You'd hang out with a freshman?" Kendall asked shocked.

"Why not? You seem like a cool guy," Logan said.

The two stood there in silence. They were both thinking about what tomorrow would bring. Neither of them wanted this night to end. Once this night ended everything would change.

"Come on let's go for a walk," Logan said. Kendall nodded his head. They both left the overlook and started for the park.

"I don't want to fall out, Logan," Kendall said after awhile. He had been thinking it. He was sure Logan had been thinking it as well. It wasn't the conversation he wanted to be having, but he had to say. He wanted Logan to know how he felt about all of this.

"Never," Logan said turning to the blonde.

"I know in one day you'll be gone and everything will change," Kendall said tears stinging his eyes as he walked.

"Yeah, well change in inevitable, but that doesn't mean we have to break up," Logan said.

"Yeah, we'll say see you later, but I don't know when the next time I'll actually see you will be," Kendall said shaking his head.

Kendall followed Logan into the big school building. Logan had offered to show him around the school and introduce him to some people.

"Are you sure you won't get shit for hanging out with a freshman?" Kendall asked as Logan led him through the hallways.

"No, but like I care," Logan said looking over his shoulder at the blonde. Kendall smiled at that. He was glad that Logan didn't seem to give a shit about what others thought. "They can think what they want it won't bother me any," he said.

"Ok then, help me find my homeroom," Kendall said pulling his schedule out of his pocket. He held it out to Logan. Logan took the schedule and grabbed Kendall's arm.

"We've got tons of time for that, first I want you to meet my friends," Logan said. He pulled Kendall down the hallway to a small set of stairs where three guys and a girl were sitting and talking. One of the guys was tall and was a brunette and had hazel eyes. Next to him stood a short Latino. Next to him was another brunette only he had green eyes. The girl had curly brown hair and dark eyes.

"Guys," Logan said getting their attention. The four of them turned to face Logan and Kendall.

"Is this the kid you were telling us about?" the tall hazel eyed boy asked looking Kendall up and down. Kendall suddenly became a bit self conscious.

"You could say that," Logan said slowly shaking his head at him.

"I'm Carlos," the Latino said, "don't mind James he doesn't have manners," he added.

"I'm Dak," the other guy said.

"I'm Camille," the girl said smiling.

"I'm Kendall," Kendall said smiling awkwardly.

"When you said kid I was expecting some small wimpy looking kid," James said to Logan.

"I'm not a kid."

"How old are you like sixteen?" James asked looking the blonde up and down.

"Fourteen,"

"Kid."

"I may be young, but I could probably still kick your ass," Kendall said glaring at James now.

"Feisty," James said laughing.

"He's fourteen and don't you have a boyfriend?" Logan asked looking at Carlos who was glaring at James.

"Not what I meant," James said looking down at the Latino beside him. He placed and arm around Carlos.

"Anyways, I met Kendall over the summer, he's got mad skill on the ice," Logan said.

"You're a hockey player?" James asked.

"He could play circles around you Diamond," Logan boasted for Kendall.

"We'll have to see about that," James said.

"I probably could," Kendall said cockily, "I mean it doesn't hurt that I learned to play from a pro hockey player," he added grinning.

"You learned from a pro?" Logan asked shocked.

"Who?" James asked.

"My dad," Kendall said shrugging.

"Knight, I knew that name sounded familiar," Logan said snapping his fingers together and pointing at Kendall.

"Your dad is Kenneth Knight?" James asked. Kendall grinned and nodded his head.

"That is so cool," Dak said.

"He's like the best hockey player in the NHL," Carlos said.

"Then call him the Mighty Knight," James said.

"Yeah, I just call him dad," Kendall said shrugging. The other four jaws dropped.

"We've been friends for like two months now and you know I like hockey and yet you failed to mention that your dad was the Might Knight of the Minnesota Wilds?" Logan asked.

"Would you treat me any different?" Kendall asked.

"No, but still, that is so cool," Logan said. Kendall laughed and shook his head.

"So, if your dads the Mighty Knight why are you guys moving here to Sherwood?" Carlos asked.

"My mom doesn't like city life and during the off season dad likes to just relax, nit that he doesn't like getting recognized by fans," Kendall said.

"I think I just found my new best friend," James stated.

"I thought I was your best friend," Carlos pouted.

"You're my boyfriend," James said moving back over to Carlos. "That allows me to do this," he said leaning in and pecking Carlos on the lips.

"You've got to let me come over more, and when your parents are home," Logan said. Kendall laughed and nodded his head.

"I'm only leaving, that doesn't change the fact that I love you," Logan said looking over at the blonde.

"You'll be gone and we'll go on with our lives, you'll meet someone new," Kendall said shaking his head. He knew their relationship probably wouldn't last. Logan was going and he was stuck here.

"Stop talking like that," Logan said shaking his head.

"It's true, in one day you'll be gone, and I'll be stuck here."

"That doesn't mean we won't see each other ever again. It's just college."

"Yeah, I've got two more years of high school Logan."

"We'll text, call, or skype," Logan said listing off all the way for them to keep in touch.

"It won't be the same," Kendall said shaking his head. It would be the same. He wouldn't be able to lay in Logan's arms anymore or kiss Logan when he wanted to. They would be miles apart and nothing would change that fact.

"Stop it," Logan said. Kendall sighed and looked away from Logan as they walked.

Kendall laughed as Logan quickly pulled him down the path of the park. They had been going for a walk when it started to rain. They had started to walk towards the park entrance. As they walked though the rain got heavier and they had started running. Logan pulled Kendall under a tall tree.

"Why are we stopping?" Kendall asked confused.

"Need a break, just hold on," Logan said as he leaned against the tree. Kendall laughed again and shook his head. They were soaking wet and needed to get home soon.

Over the last few months Kendall had gotten to know Logan. They hung out a lot and Kendall had met Logan's friends, but they mostly hung out just the two of them. Kendall had fun with Logan and he'd be lying if he said he didn't want more from the brunette. He knew Logan wouldn't do anything though, because of their age difference. Kendall was only fourteen after all.

"What?" Logan asked bringing the blonde out of his thoughts.

"Huh?" Kendall asked confused.

"You're staring at me," Logan said.

"Oh sorry," Kendall said blushing. He looked away from Logan. He was usually so discreet about his staring.

"Kendall," Logan said as he moved over to the blonde.

"Yeah," Kendall said his heart beating a bit faster. Logan stopped right in front of him.

Kendall looked into his eyes. They were the best shade of brown he had ever seen. He loved how bright they would get when he laughed, or how dark they got when he was mad about something. He hated seemed them dull with sadness though. Right now his eyes were a bit darker than normal. It wasn't an angry dark either, it was something else completely. Kendall couldn't quite put his finger on what it was though.

"There's something I've been wanting to do," Logan said.

"Oh?"

"Yeah."

"What's that?" Kendall swallowed the lump forming in his throat. He hoped Logan was talking about what he was thinking.

"I think I wanna kiss you."

The two fell silent as they looked into each other eyes. A small smile played across Kendall's lips.

"What's stopping you?"

Logan grinned and leaned in. He pressed his lips to Kendall's in a simple kiss. It was breathing takingly sweet and full of emotions Kendall had never felt. As quickly as it had started it was over.

Kendall stood there staring at Logan. He had been wanting that to happen for so long now. He had imagined it for weeks now and it finally happened. He was so happy.

"Go on a date with me," Logan said suddenly.

"Can't," Kendall said.

"Why not?" Logan asked confused.

"See, I'm probably gonna get a cold soon and I won't be able to leave my room, you can thank this really hot guy for keeping me out in the rain too long," Kendall said grinning. Logan laughed and shook his head. He grabbed Kendall's hand and they started running again.

"Just say you won't forget me," Kendall said turning his head to look back at Logan. He needed to hear the words come for Logan's mouth. That would make him feel better, even if he knew Logan would eventually forget him. He just wanted to hear the words.

"I will never forget you Kendall. You're one of a kind. You're very unforgettable," Logan said stopping. He grabbed Kendall's hand and made him stop as well. He made Kendall look at him. "See you're this amazing guy who doesn't realize how amazing he really is," he said.

"I'm not amazing," Kendall said shaking his head. He didn't know why what Logan saw in him. They were two years apart in age. Kendall had only been a freshman when they started dating, while Logan had been a junior.

"You are to, now shut up," Logan said as he leaned in and pressed a kiss to Kendall's lips.

"Am not, you're a fool blinded by love," Kendall said.

Kendall slowly walked along. He had no idea where he was because Logan blindfolded him. He wanted their first date to be a surprise.

"Are we there yet?" Kendall asked.

"Almost," Logan said his hand on Kendall's lower back guiding him along. Kendall was trying to guess where they were. He didn't hear the crunch of gravel or the tap form waking on concrete. The ground was soft. They had to be walking on grass.

"Seriously how much farther?" Kendall asked.

"Ok stop," Logan said. Logan reached up and pulled the blindfold down. Kendall let his eyes adjust and saw a blanket before him with two lanterns and a picnic basket. He also saw an insect repellant and smiled. He turned to Logan.

"It's perfect," He said.

"I thought you might like it," Logan said.

"I do," Kendall said nodding his head. They both sat down on the blanket together and started eating the sandwiches Logan had made. They talked and laughed over things that had been happening in school or in their lives.

"Favorite book," Kendall said.

"Easy Wicked," Logan replied quickly. "Ok what about you favorite color?"

"Green. Favorite movie?"

"Any Nightmare on Elm Street movie except the remake. What about your favorite movie?"

"I've got to say the Lion King is still one of the best movies ever."

"God you're such a kid sometimes," Logan teased.

"What, it's an amazing movie," Kendall argued.

"I guess," Logan shrugged. Kendall laughed and shook his head. "Favorite Actor."

"Johnny Depp, he's hot," Kendall said quickly.

"That was a fast answer."

"Sorry," Kendall blushed. "Your favorite actor," he said turning the attention away from him.

"Jack Black, he is hilarious," Logan said laughing at Kendall's attempt to change the conversation.

They finished eating and Logan packed the things in the basket and laid down. Kendall did the same. He laid down next to the brunette. They laid there watching the stars and Logan pointed out the constellations. Kendall nodded his head as he listened to the brunette talk.

"I love you Kendall Knight, I will visit on holiday breaks and on weekends when I can manage it, it's only a two and half hour drive," Logan said.

"That's too far for my liking," Kendall said shaking his head. Logan sighed and leaned his forehead against Kendall's.

"Stop it, this will work," Logan said.

"Wanna go somewhere else?" Kendall asked suddenly. He didn't like the turn this conversation was taking. He didn't want to think about Logan leaving, yet it was all they could talk about.

"Yeah, I've got some last minute packing to finish up," Logan said nodding his head.

"I'll help you," Kendall offered.

"You don't have to," Logan said shaking his head. Kendall reached over and grabbed Logan's hand. Logan looked up at the blonde.

"I know, I want to," Kendall said, "please tonight just let it be you and me. It's all I really need," he said silently begging Logan to let him help him.

"It'll be really boring," Logan said.

"Nothing with you is ever boring Logie," Kendall said, "I just wanna what little time I have with you. Just one more day and then we go," he said. Logan nodded his head. They made their way out of the park in silence.

Kendall was sitting in the Mitchell's living room. Logan was in the kitchen doing the dishes from supper, when Mr. Mitchell walked into the room followed my his wife.

"We need to talk to you," Mr. Mitchell said.

"About what?" Kendall asked confused. He looked around for Logan.

"It's about Logan," Mrs. Mitchell said. Kendall slowly nodded his head.

"He's talking about staying here for college," Mr. Mitchell said.

"No, he's applying to UMD," Kendall said. Logan had been talking about UMD nonstop. It was where he had wanted to go for a long time.

"Well lately he's been talking about applying to Sherwood Community College," Mr. Mitchell said.

"Because of me?" Kendall asked. Mr. and Mrs. Mitchell both nodded their heads.

"We don't want him to stay behind and miss his chance to become a doctor," Mrs. Mitchell said.

"Me either, I mean it's all he talks about," Kendall said.

"So we're on the same page then," Mrs. Mitchell asked. Kendall nodded his head.

"You want me to talk him into going to UMD," Kendall said. The Mitchell's nodded their heads again. They heard footsteps in the hallway. The Mitchell's stood up and smiled at Kendall.

"Now don't stay up too late," Mrs. Mitchell said.

"Yes mom we know, lights out by eleven," Logan said smiling as he walked into the room. He gave his mother a kiss and said good night to his father. Once they left Logan turned his attention to the blonde. Kendall smiled at him.

They made their way to Logan's house. Logan's parents were out of town for the weekend. They would be back in time to see their son off. There were open boxes scattered around the apartment. Kendall and Logan both got to work packing the last few things Logan would be taking with him. They were going through a bin of Logan's.

"What about this?" Kendall asked grabbed a worn out copy of Wicked. Logan looked at the book and shook his head.

"I've read that book so many times I know it word for word almost," Logan said.

"I think I'll keep it," Kendall said looking at the book. Logan just nodded his head. That was how most the night went. Throwing thing into boxes or away or Kendall keeping something small like a book or picture of them together.

Kendall and Logan were walking through the park again. It seemed like all their dates ended here somehow. This place had some sort of pull over them.

"I got into UMD," Logan said quietly.

"That's good," Kendall said nodding his head. He knew Logan was going to college. He wanted to be a doctor. He had a dream to follow.

"I also got into SCC," Logan said casually.

"Don't," Kendall said shaking his head. He knew what Logan was planning on saying and he didn't want to hear it.

"What?"

"You're going to UMD."

"I don't want to leave you."

"Come on Logan, we knew this wouldn't last, I mean I'm a sophomore and you're a senior."

"We've been together for over a year now."

"Yeah, but what we have is a high school romance, nothing more."

"Says who?"

"Everyone."

"Everyone really?"

"Yeah, my mom, your mom, teachers, your friends."

"They are not my friends if they can't accept you."

"So, you're only friends are James and Carlos then?" Kendall asked grinning. Logan laughed and nodded his head. James and Carlos were the only two friends that Logan had that accepted them dating because they were the same way. James was a senior like Logan and Carlos was a junior.

"I guess so," Logan said. Kendall grabbed Logan's hand. He led him over to the grass. He sat down pulling Logan with him.

"Let's watch the stars," Kendall said. He didn't want to talk about Logan leaving. Logan nodded his head.

Kendall would glance at the clock every so often. He was counting down the hours until Logan would leave him. That's all he was really thinking about. Logan leaving him. It was hard not to. It was like his world was crashing in on him.

Soon it was after midnight and they were almost done when Kendall got hungry. He made them some instant cup ramen. They sat down to eat while Logan finally had everything sorted.

"I'm done," Logan said looking around the boxes in his bedroom. He had everything he was taking in boxes labeled college, things he wanted to keep but leave here were labeled storage. The rest had gone in the garbage.

"Kind of make this all seem real," Kendall said. Logan nodded his head. He moved closer to Kendall. "Can I stay here tonight?" Kendall asked.

"Might as well," Logan said looking at the clock. He yawned and stood up. Kendall did as well. They tossed their empty ramen cups in the small trashcan in Logan's room. Logan changed into a pair of pajamas.

"I told my mom I was staying here anyways when I left the house," Kendall said as he took his shirt and jeans off. They climbed into bed together.

"Good night Kendall," Logan said kissing the blonde's forehead.

"Yeah, night Logie," Kendall said as he snuggled into the brunette's chest. He smiled as he breathed in Logan's scent. It helped relax him and allow him to actually get some sleep.

"Do you ever wish you had moved out of my way that day?"

Kendall, who had been looking up at the stars rolled onto his side to look at Logan. He rested his head on his hand. Logan looked over at him waiting for an answer.

"No," Kendall said simply.

"Why not? I mean I see the hurt look you get whenever I talk about college, or the fact that in a few weeks I am leaving," Logan said.

"Yeah, it sucks that you're leaving, but I wouldn't change what we have for anything," Kendall said.

"Don't start spewing that 'It's better to loved and lost then to never have loved at all' crap," Logan said.

"Well it is," Kendall said laughing. Logan shook his head.

"Me either," Logan said. "I'd never give you up," he added grinning.

"Good cause you're stuck with me," Kendall said.

"Good, cause I love you," Logan said. Kendall's jaw dropped slightly. Logan had never said that too him. The whole two years they had been dating they had dance around that word. Neither of them had wanted to say it. They knew a day would come when one of them would be leaving.

Kendall helped Logan load everything into his car. His parents were inside making him a lunch for the road and James and Carlos were bound to show up sooner or later. Carlos wanted to say good bye to Logan as well.

"Is this over then?" Kendall asked quietly.

"How many times do I have to tell you, this isn't the end?" Logan asked. He grabbed the blonde and pulled him to him in a hug. "I love you and we will make this work," he said.

"I'm scared to say good bye," Kendall admitted. He didn't know what would happen after he said good bye.

"This is just a see you later until next time," Logan said softly. Logan leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to the blonde's lips.

Kendall clenched his eyes shut. Every time Logan said that it felt like one bad punch line, and it was a joke that sucked. Kendall hated this joke more than anything. He knew once Logan got settled into college life he's move on.

"Dude!"

Kendall and Logan both turned and saw James and Carlos getting out of James' car. James was also heading off college with Logan. Carlos was upset too, but he was hiding it better than Kendall. Carlos and James ran up to Logan. Carlos to say good bye James wanted to know if he was ready to go yet.

"I love you too," Kendall said after a few moments. Logan smiled and leaned in and kissed him. They both rolled back on to their backs and looked at the sky.

Kendall didn't know how long they laid there together. He knew the longer they stayed out the more trouble he'd get in. He didn't care though. He only had a few more weeks with Logan before he left. The closer the end of the summer got, the more scared Kendall got. He didn't want Logan to go, but he had to let him.

Kendall sighed and looked up at the sky. A star streaked across the sky. "Look a shooting star," he said quickly. Logan smiled and looked up as well.

Kendall watched as Mr. and Mrs. Mitchell made a fuss over Logan. They even gave James hugs. They had known James a long time and he was practically a second son to them. Once they were done they stepped back from Logan tears in their eyes. Logan had a few tears as well.

Kendall walked over to Logan once again. He pulled him into a hug.

"So this is it isn't it?" Kendall asked as tears pricked at his eyes.

"Yeah," Logan said nodding his head.

"Make a wish," Logan said.

Kendall closed his eyes and thought for a moment. He didn't know what to wish for. He had everything he wanted right now. He had a great family. He had the best boyfriend in the world.

"I love you," Kendall said a few tears falling down his cheeks.

"I love you too," Logan said. He leaned in and captured the blonde's lips in a kiss. Kendall knew James and Carlos were doing the same thing. Logan then backed away from Kendall.

"Good bye," Kendall said weakly.

"See you later," Logan corrected the blonde. Kendall smiled at that.

Logan walked over to his car. He looked back at Kendall once more. Kendall gave a small nod of his head. He knew he had to tell Logan to go otherwise he'd never go. Logan got in his car and he pulled out of the driveway. He left with James following behind him.

Kendall the realized what he wanted to wish for. There was only one thing he wanted. One thing more than anything in the world. He wasn't asking for much either. It wasn't like he was greedy and asked for a lot. He was happy with what he had. There was just one thing he wanted.

Kendall stood there, staring at where Logan's car had disappeared until he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up at Mr. Mitchell.

"He'll keep his word, he loves you," Mr. Mitchell said.

"Yeah, he really does care about you," Mrs. Mitchell said. Kendall nodded his head. He knew Logan cared about him.

"You did the right thing," Mr. Mitchell said.

"I know," Kendall said nodding his head. He knew convincing Logan to go was in Logan's best interest. He had to go and follow his dream not stay here because of Kendall. He knew it was the right thing to do, yet he felt like shit right now. He already missed Logan and he wasn't even gone ten minutes.

Carlos walked up to Kendall and placed a hand on his shoulder after the Mitchell's left. Kendall looked at Carlos.

"It's gonna be ok," Carlos said.

"He's gone," Kendall said shaking his head.

"I just don't want this to end," Kendall said tears in his eyes once more.

Kendall looked up at the sky. I wish that what Logan and I have will never end. Kendall looked over at the brunette with a smile.

So I've been on a Sam Tsui kick lately. HE IS AMAZING AND I LOVE HIM! I can't wait for his original album to come out. IF you haven't checked out Sam go do it, as previously stated he's amazing, not BTR AMAZING, but amazing nonetheless. Anyways this song just screamed Kogan to me. The idea has been bouncing around in my head for awhile now so I just had to write it. I know it's a bit sad, but I hardly do fics like this. I kind of like how it turned out. I hope you like it.

Always

OUTOFMYMIND