Italy's Dream!~

Summary: We all know Feliciano Vargas to be a very carefree and happy Italian. Why should his dreams be any different?

Warning: Complete and pure crack. Lots of swearing because Romano makes an appearance. Also if you squint real hard, you can find some sexual innuendos.

Pairings: ItalyxNoodle ItalyxGermany

The cheerful Italian stood in front of the stylish sink in his Villa, located in Rome, Italy, brushing his teeth cheerfully. "Ve, I cannot wait to getta some sleep! That World Meeting really tired me out! Especially when I had to stop fratello from stabbing Big Brother Spain with a spork…" Feliciano thought brushing the very fronts of his teeth that were somewhat tinted red from the spaghetti sauce. The Northern half of Italy finished up brushing away at his tinted red teeth and washed his mouth out with a bit of water, then sliding on his plush green, white, and red slippers.

Feliciano leaped across his room towards his bed, jumping farther than Spain when Romano tried to stab him with the spoon/fork hybrid utensil. "Ve~ My bed feels like one giant meatball~" he chimed as he snuggled under the large white sheets. He then proceeded to do what he usually did before he went to sleep, which was basically counting sheep, except using tomatoes. "Ve…One tomato, two tomatoes, three tomatoes…"

5 tomatoes later-

The Italian had dozed off quickly as his body now sprawled out across the large queen sized bed, occasionally twitching. But inside Feliciano's head, many things were occurring.

Insides Italy's Dream-

Italy sat in a corner, holding his arms up in defense; he only wore a pair of green white and red boxers. "No! Please donta hurt me anymore! I love you! Ti amo! Ti amo!" In front of Feliciano was a 5 foot tall spaghetti noodle with stick like legs and arms and holding a belt. Yes, a spaghetti noodle with arms legs and holding a belt. "Silence you scandalous wench! You have had an affair with me! With that ravioli swine" the noodle yelled, cracking the belt in the air. "Ve! No! You have it all wrong! I was only over at Mr. Ravioli's house to fix his plumbing!" Italy cried. "I saw the tomato sauce on your pantaloons you heathen! The spaghetti noodle shouted.

"You're always like this when you smoke oregano!" Italy yelled. "Silence mortal!" "Blitzkrieg!" Suddenly, a gigantic white horse burst through the door and on top of the spaghetti noodle, effectively breaking it in half. On top of it was Germany who was carrying a spatula and had a pan on top of his head. "Arg! My ribs! You barbarian!" the Spaghetti Noodle yelled in agony. Germany slid off the horse and stared down at the noodle "Sorry my friend, but I like my noodles, blood red." He said as he swung his mighty spatula of glory down, slicing the noodle in half again as the whole place exploded.

Then within moments, a new world formed with Italy on a throne, Japan and Germany sitting next to him in much smaller chairs.

"Vee, look at yourself, now back to me, now back at yourself. As you can see I am now the World's leader. Now look at yourself, you are now my peasant. Now look to your left, now to your other left. Where are you? You are in what used to be Russia, until I dropped the ravioli bomb! Vee I'm on a throne~"

The world then dissolved and reformed to the Fifa World Cup in 2014. It was in the finals, Italy and Spain 2-2. "There's no doubt about it, we are going into a penalty shootout, there is only 3 minutes left and neither team is giving an inch! Feliciano Vargas, the leader of the team seems completely exhausted!" Italy stood with the ball at his feet, panting heavily. "Vee…I can't do it…I am to tired…" Italy saw Spanish players like David Villa and Fernando Torres surrounding him. "Is this the end…?" Italy asked staring to the stands.

Suddenly through the crowd came Germany wearing high heels and lipstick yelling "Go Feliciano! Score and I will give you my wurst!" He then looked to the other side and saw his brother, who had been sent off with a red card for trying to stab Spain with a spork. "Score you twit! Don't let that tomato dildo win!" Italy stood there for a moment as the clock ticked by…."That's it! I should score!" Italy though, and upon hitting this revelation he began to charge up. Suddenly he released all his energy and his hair became a gold yellow, even his curl. He started to charge forward with the soccer ball at his feet "Ciao Fernando! Look! Chelsea is giving your contract back to Liverpool!" Feliciano yelled, barreling towards them.

Fernando Torres blinked then started rushing towards the sidelines "No! Please don't! They'll kill me!" he screamed. David Villa watched his friend run off and shook his head "It's no matter amigo! I can stop you on my own! For I am the one and only, David Villa!" "Arrivederci!" Italy yelled, spring past him as he was boasting. Italy basically flew past the rest of the defense with ease. "Oh my god he may score! But he will have to get past Iker Casillas!" As Italy drew close he slowed down

"Curl slap!"

he yelled as he whipped his hair, his curl pimp slapping Casillas right across the face. During that Italy tapped the ball in. "Vee I win! I win!" he yelled as the final whistle blew and he pranced up and down the field. Romano suddenly hugged him "Thank you Fratello! You are so amazing! You are far superior than I!" "Si I know!" Italy chimed. Suddenly Romano stared him in the eyes and screamed "Wake up stronzo!"

Italy suddenly bolted up to see his angry brothers face "Can I not sleep in for once in my damn life! God if it isn't Spain than it's you!" he vented as Italy just stared forward in confusion. "Che? What'd I do fratello?" he asked tilting his head. Romano stared at him for a moment in disbelief "You were just fucking screaming 'I won I won I won!' like you just won the god damn Fifa cup! I was having a nice god damn dream about tomatos! But now then you had to go and soil it!" "Soil it? Isn't that what you did in the bed when you were a kid-" "Shut up you stronzo! I swear I'll get that spork and-"

" Curl slap vee~"

WACK

With Romano outcold Italy snuggled back into his bed "Vee~ Now Germany can give me his wurst~"

Translation-

Che?- What?

Fratello- Brother

Stronzo- Ass

Ti amo!- I love you!

Arrivederci- Good-bye/Farewell