Sollux could remember everything.

He remembered the old Mituna, the older brother he so desperately aspired to be. He remembered the intelligent boy who always did his homework, always received perfect grades, always smiled, and always had a skateboard in his hand. Mituna was one of the cool kids, and having him as an older brother only upped Sollux's status among the other fifth graders.

Mituna had always wanted three things from life. He'd wanted to be an anthropologist when he grew up, a professional skateboarder, and he wanted "the ladies".

Sollux remembered walking home from school, Gameboy clasped tightly between small hands, and listening to Mituna talk about everything. Sometimes he'd talk about insects, or any new type of bug that was recently discovered in whats-it-ran. Sometimes Mituna would talk about the girl he had a major crush on, Tulip is what he called her, and that he planned on asking her out next time they went boarding; although, he never did because he chickened out last minute. Sometimes he would talk about skateboarding, or teaching Sollux sometime.

Most of all, Mituna liked to talk about the world. He was a very observant person. He liked to talk about different sayings, and he preferred to spend the rest of the walk home talking about his theories and why he had them.

Mituna also liked to talk about their parents.

"Do you think Ma wouldn't have started drinkin' if Dad was still around?" he'd ask.

Sollux would look up from his Gameboy, clutching the beeping machine so tightly between his hands that his knuckles turned white. "Yeah," he'd say quietly. He never had any response for those questions. He didn't fully understand them.

Sollux didn't know why his mother had taken a liking to drinking. He figured it was because of their father leaving, but he could never find her at a time when she was sober enough to ask her and receive a response. She wasn't home much, but Sollux was okay with it. He had Mituna.

He remembered everyone in his family constantly fawning over Mituna at reunions. He remembered Mituna refusing to get his hair cut, even when their aunt had threatened to drag him to the salon in a body bag. He remembered Mituna showing Sollux how to code his very first lines, including variables and every other trick known to coding. He remembered Mituna asking for a beehive for Christmas. He remembered Mituna's boycotting phase, when he refused to buy a certain type of honey because of harsh treatment to the bees.

He remembered Mituna hated to be called "Tuna."

"Ma, I ain't a type of fish. I'm Mituna."

"Oh, c'mon, Tuna! It's cute!"

"Maaaa, stop."

He knew everything about Mituna.

It only took less than a millisecond for him to know nothing about Mituna.

They had been at the skate-park. Mituna had demanded that he teach Sollux how to skateboard, and he wouldn't take no for an answer. So, in response, Sollux had gone with Mituna that morning to learn how to skateboard and, hopefully, not get himself killed.

Of course, Sollux was terrible at skateboarding. He naturally had no athletic ability; he was the scrawny kid with glasses and a lisp, how could he have any chance at a sport. He was the boy who fell up the stairs. He had no balance, and skateboarding was definitely not for him.

Mituna insisted they didn't give up. "C'mon, Sollux. At least try," he huffed. "You can do it."

Sollux leveled him with an irritated gaze. "I'm altho the Queen of Sheba," he snipped.

Mituna grinned and slapped him on the back of the head affectionately. "Just do it. I already showed you how."

Sollux cast a doubtful gaze down at his knee pads. "I don't think I'm cut out for thith. Really."

"I'll hide all the honey in the house."

"You wouldn't."

"I would."

"But I'll thtarve to death!" Sollux objected.

Mituna flashed a charming smile in his direction. "Guess you better show me some rad skills then, huh?" he teased.

And then Sollux was off, wobbling slowly down the side walk on top of a red and blue skateboard. He clutched onto his helmet tightly, his whole frame shaking with fear. He knew he looked ridiculous, moving at less than five miles per hour, and looking absolutely terrified.

He guessed if he was more of a risk taker, he'd love skateboarding. But Sollux liked solid ground, like solid facts; he hated feeling like he had no control. He could kind of see why Mituna like skateboarding, in a crazy sort of twisted way.

He could see Mituna liking the feeling of wind blowing any thoughts unrelated to this moment away. He could see Mituna falling in love with the speed, the freedom, the escape. It made sense; Mituna was always so responsible when he wasn't hitting on girls. Mituna was always the older brother, basically a father figure.

Unfortunately for Sollux, he hadn't been listening to the distant shouts behind him. He had been busy with staring down at the rickety skateboard.

He didn't hear Mituna's shouts of panic and worry. He didn't hear Mituna shouting for him to turn around before he reached the main road. He didn't hear the sound of loud plastic wheels on cement as Mituna pelted down the sidewalk after his little brother.

He didn't see the trees that lined the skate-park thinning out with each turn of the wheels. He didn't see the exit signs that inevitably led to the main road. He didn't see his brother peeling down the sidewalk at top speed.

He didn't see the eighteen-wheeler thundering down the main road that laid at the end of the park boundaries.

He heard the loud blare of a car horn. He heard the shouting voice, much like Mituna's, right next to his ear, telling him to "fucking move."

He felt himself shoved forward, into the ditch of the other side of the road. He felt the skateboard fly out from under his feet. He felt his back connect with the ice cold ground and the breath leave his lungs.

He saw Mituna was right behind him.

He saw the edge of Mituna's skateboard be clipped by the side of the large truck.

He saw Mituna fly over where he lay on the ground. He saw the wide look of fear in his brother's eyes. He saw the outstretched arms, bracing themselves for the inevitable impact that awaited.

He heard the impact as Mituna collided with ground, a sickening crack and a whoosh of breath.

Mituna hadn't been wearing a helmet.

He'd given his helmet to Sollux.

Sollux was sure there had been a time lapse without his knowledge. Suddenly, he was being loaded into the back of an ambulance. Suddenly, he felt an oxygen mask being pressed harshly over his face, and he felt himself being lifted onto a gurney.

He heard the wail of sirens, the flow of words of a million questions being directed at him. He wanted to tell them to ask Mituna, that Mituna would explain everything. He wanted to yell at them that he was fine, Mituna was fine.

He saw the flash of red lights. He saw the disgustingly yellow stripes wrapping around the ambulance, proudly announcing that help had arrived. He saw the flash of red and blue lights. He saw the faces of strangers peering over him with concerned and analytical eyes.

Suddenly, he saw his mother. He saw her disheveled hair, pulled tightly into a bun. He saw the tears flowing freely down her face and the phone clutched tightly in her hand as she sprinted forward. He saw the mascara running down her face and the wild look of fear.

But she wasn't running toward Sollux. He wanted to call out to her, tell her she was running in the wrong direction. He wanted to tell her that he was right here, he was okay, she could stop worrying.

Suddenly, he saw where his mother was running. Suddenly, he wished he was blind.

He saw Mituna, or what he assumed was Mituna, surrounded by paramedics. He saw a large oxygen mask much like his own strapped over his face. He saw Mituna's usually dandelion-like hair matted close to his head with a dark substance that he desperately hoped was syrup and not blood. He saw a large cut stretching across Mituna's face, and he saw arms and legs bent at an odd angle.

He heard his mother wailing and sobbing uncontrollably. He saw her screaming in frustration and demanding to know whether or not Mituna would be okay.

She didn't once ask what had happened.

She wanted to know that Mituna was alright.

Suddenly, there was another time lapse. Suddenly, he was sitting in a room. The room was large and white, and it seemed as if the original intention had been designed for a lack of color. The only sign of life was a small potted plant which, upon further inspection, wasn't alive at all because it was fake. Rows of chairs lined the walls, and people scattered themselves around by sitting in the quietly.

No one spoke. Only the sounds of a murmuring television and a beeping heart machine could be heart distantly in the other rooms, minus the occasional cough. Every now and then, an announcement would sound over the intercom, but no one had a clue what "Code Orange, room 201-B," meant unless they were a doctor or nurse.

But Sollux listened anyway. He wasn't sure what he was listening for. Part of him didn't even know what was going on, or why he was even there. He listened anyway. He knew how to code, but he didn't know anything about hospital coding. He decided that whatever the codes meant, they weren't fun or relaxing like the coding he did at home.

He decided the coding must have meant something bad.

So he listened. He strained his ears for one number and one letter. He didn't know why he was listening, because he was sure that he definitely didn't want to hear it. However, he listened, if only to reassure his self that what he was listening for would never be called.

This time, time didn't lapse. In fact, it seemed as if time had ceased altogether. It felt like Sollux wasn't there anymore, he was simply watching. Time no longer was an aspect of his life; it didn't affect him.

Suddenly, Mituna wasn't Mituna anymore.

Suddenly, Mituna didn't get good grades anymore. At first, his teachers attempted to go easy on him; he had been in a coma for three months, the least they could do was give him a bit of a break. Eventually, they were forced to give him a failing grade for his performance on tests. Some insisted they not fail him, some insisted he be put into special education.

The boy who was once on the road toward being valedictorian was now in special education and barely scraping by.

Suddenly, Mituna wasn't the cool older brother. Mituna's old friends, skaters and normal peers alike, discovered this fact within five minutes of talking to the once popular boy. Mituna wasn't the same, so he was no longer cool. Mituna was now the older brother with a terrible head injury, and, instead of being admired among his peers, Sollux was now given sympathetic glances everywhere he went. He heard the whispers about his brother when he walked in the hallway, he heard them even more so at lunch. He even heard the teachers talk about Mituna, and even the teachers tried to raise Sollux's grade of a C to a B out of condolences.

The boy who was talked about as "that cool skater dude," was now "that boy with the head injury."

Suddenly, Mituna didn't care about being called Tuna. He let mom call him Tuna anytime she wanted, and he even preferred the name at times. He responded to Tuna more often than he did to his actual name. Mituna didn't care if his mom would fawn over him and call him Tuna in front of his friends, because he liked the nickname now.

The boy who used to be so adamant about being called by his real name no longer knew the difference between his nickname, and Mituna.

At first, Sollux didn't feel bad about it. At first, Sollux didn't even understand what had happened to Mituna. He didn't understand why Mituna was so different now.

At first, Sollux couldn't find it in himself to have any emotions. They seemed to have fled from him. He didn't feel angry, or depressed, or scared, or frustrated, or happy, or even mildly content. He felt nothing.

No, that wasn't quite true. Sollux did feel something if he tried digging deep enough.

He felt empty.

Hollow.

Sunken.

Vacuous.

That was at first.

It took about two months before the insults reached him; the snide and snarky comments that slipped out of the students' mouths and flew to his ears tauntingly.

He had been sitting in math class, working on one of the problems the teacher had put up on the board. He hadn't been listening really, he'd been thinking. All Sollux really did anymore was think, and he especially liked to think during school so no one could bother him.

Then he heard it.

"I heard his brother was retarded or something."

"Yeah, he's a window licker now. Used to be real smart 'til Sollux caused him to have an accident."

"What happened?"

"Got hit by a car or something, I dunno. He's definitely retarded though."

"Wonder if his little brother is too. Wouldn't be surprised."

Sollux didn't think it would bother him as much as it did. Nothing had bothered him for the past two months, why should people talking about his brother bother him now?

But now, he couldn't force away the sick feeling that settled deep within himself. His forehead and hands felt clammy, and he tasted bile in his mouth. He needed to leave, it was terrible.

They were terrible.

He was terrible.

Everything was suddenly so, very terrible.

It was from that moment onward that nothing would be the same. He knew it. He knew Mituna's accident had changed his whole life around. He knew the accident was what pushed Sollux so far back into his shell he had almost no chance of coming back out. He knew the accident caused their mother to start acting like a mother, to give up drinking. He knew the accident caused Mituna to lose everything.

He knew everything was partially his fault.

Sollux never took the blame for anything. He hated feeling guilty. He hated being blamed. He hated being at fault.

Because the one thing, the one occurrence in which he was found guilty, was the worst thing he had ever done throughout his whole life. He'd hurt the one he was closest to, practically killed him. He'd caused the one person he cared about the most, needed the most, to lose everything they had ever aspired to be or have.

And he told Eridan everything. He spilled out every last detail, every emotion, every concern, every last thought or encounter he had gone through. He held nothing back. The words flowed freely from him, worked their way through choked sobs and gasping breaths, and hung in the air like smoke in an enclosed room.

It was then he found himself curled in towards Eridan, eyes clamped shut, fists clenched together, arms snaked around broad shoulders, and face pressed into a soft material that could only be designer. He felt sobs wrack through his body in an irregular pattern.

But Eridan was there. He held Sollux closely, arms wrapped tightly around the other. He kept Sollux grounded, made sure he knew he wasn't alone, that Eridan was there. He drew small circles on Sollux's back as a means of comfort. He whispered quietly over and over that he was there for Sollux, that it was okay, that Sollux would be alright.

Slowly, ever so slowly, Sollux felt himself believing those words. He felt himself believing what Eridan was saying. He felt the shell he had worn for so long slowly cracking, crumbling to pieces. He felt the walls tumbling downwards. He felt himself falling and spiraling downwards fast than the speed of light.

Strangely, he found himself okay with this fact.

And suddenly, time stood still. Everything stopped. For just that one moment, in that small space of time, it was the two of them. It was just them, curled up on the couch and clutching each other tightly.

"Hey, Sol?"

"Yeah?"

"Wwhatevver happens, wwe'll alwways havve eachother, right?"

Then Eridan had murmured his name. He said it so quietly that, at first, Sollux was sure he had been imagining it. Eridan had said his name a second time, a bit louder, and fully gained Sollux's attention.

Sollux pulled back from Eridan's tear-stained shirt. His eyes were puffy, his face red, and he was sure he looked like a character out of a horror movie. "Yeah?" he croaked.

Suddenly, Eridan had shifted Sollux closer. Suddenly, one of his hands had removed themselves from around the other's waist and was placed precariously on the side of Sollux's face. Eridan's gaze shifted, no longer portraying concern, but something entirely unknown to Sollux. His eyes were lidded, and his Bambii-like lashes framed perfectly dark blue eyes.

"Hey, Sol."

Sollux's eyes pierced into Eridan's questioningly. He couldn't bring himself to speak.

Eridan took a deep shuddering breath, and let it out slowly. "I lovve you."

It had taken less than five months, but it had happened. It sounded unreasonable, irrational, but every part of those three words was completely true.

"I love you too, aththhole," he whispered.

There it was again, the same feeling. Static hung between them, just as it had back whenever Sollux had lost his glasses at work. It was odd, like the calm before the storm, and it was extremely tangible in every sense of the word. Sollux knew Eridan felt it, he had to. Every part of him was completely and suddenly aware of Eridan; his closeness, his eyes, his heartbeat, his breath, everything.

Suddenly, Sollux felt extremely aware of himself as well. He felt the increase of his pulse. He felt his heart pounding and threatening to jump from his chest. He felt sweat gathering at the base of his neck. He felt his eyes widening in shock. He felt everything, and suddenly wanted to feel everything.

A small tug, with barely enough force for the other to even register its appearance, and Sollux was there. The distance between the two of them closed, and everything stopped.

There weren't fireworks. There weren't sparks.

There was safety. There was a feeling of exposure; raw and bare and on display for the other to see with nothing in the way. There was static, like a drug, intoxicating.

Suddenly, the distance between them closed; a soft brush of lips, a harsh nip, a hiss of breath. Everything suddenly felt right in the world. Each insecurity seemed to fade with each brush of the lips. Every ailment disappeared with every desperate tug in an attempt of closeness. They were no longer Eridan and Sollux, nor Sollux and Eridan.

Finally, like all good things coming to an end, they returned to reality. They returned to who they were, no longer one person.

However, Eridan didn't move away. They stayed in that same position, foreheads pressed together, breaths leaving in quick short pants.

A small smile curved across Eridan's lips, and an amused look colored his gaze.

Sollux quirked a small smile back at Eridan. "What?" He heart seemed to be fluttering against his ribcage, slamming around in an attempt to escape.

"I wwas just thinkin', Sol," Eridan began slowly. "You really havve me…" He trailed off his words, a smirk fitting onto his face.

Sollux scowled at him, more irritated than angry. "What ith it, ED?" he huffed.

"I wwas just goin' to say, Sol, you really havve me… Captorvvated."

He had never hit someone so hard in his life.

THE END