Blink of an Eye

Blink. She waves goodbye to Simon, trying to keep her eyes on him in a crowd of rapidly blurring faces. But she blinks and his face vanishes into the mass of people. She smiles and turns to face the front of the train.

Blink. Blink. Blink. She blinks rapidly, trying to bring the people into focus around her. Everything's blurring and sharpening at an alarming rate, spinning around and around and around. She's getting dizzy, and the floor comes rushing up to meet her face.

Blink….She squeezes her eyes shut as tight as they can go, waiting until the pressure becomes too much and colors explode like fireworks inside her head. When she opens them, the body is still there on the floor. People move closer, reaching for her. Blink….

Blink blink blink. She blinks back the tears threatening to roll down her face and pulls herself closer to Simon. If she cries, he will be sad, and she does not want him to be sad. The tears come down anyways.

Blink. Her eyes shut on Simon's face hovering above her, staring down at her with a mixture of concern and love. When she reopens them, Simon is gone, only an echo of his face pressed into the wall of the cabin.

Blinkblinkblinkblink. She hangs upside down from the catwalks, blurring the game below into a series of images that she can play and replay for as long as it takes.

Blink. "River, no touching guns!" Blink. "Are you even listening to me?" Blink. "River?" Blink. "Ri-ver!" Blink. "Hey, come back here!" Blink. When she reopens her eyes, there is only stars and sky and Serenity.

Blink. Blink. Blink blink blinkblinkblink. Sometimes she thinks that if she blinks long enough, hard enough, fast enough, she will be able to skip to the part of her life where she is better and Simon is happy and they are safe.

Blink. Blink. "River, what are you doing?" Simon looks at her, hands pausing in the act of putting more protein on her plate. She pauses in her blinking, eyes traveling over the faces of her tablemates. "Saving the memories. Slowing time. Counting the seconds between the thunder and the lightning." Blink. Blink. Blink. "Girl's ruttin' crazy." Blink. "Aren't we all?" Blinkblinkblink.