Silver Tongue

Belongs to JKR

Credit to kellydofc for inspiration.

"I'm sorry."

"I'm not interested."

"I'm sorry!"

"Save your breath."

It was nighttime. Lily, who was wearing a dressing gown, stood with her arms folded in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady, at the entrance to Gryffindor Tower.

"I only came out because Mary told me you were threatening to sleep here."

"I was. I would have done. I never meant to call you Mudblood, it just-"

"Slipped out?" There was no pity in Lily's voice. "It's too late. I've made excuses for you for years. None of my friends can understand why I even talk to you. You and your precious little Death Eater friends – you see, you don't even deny it! You don't even deny that's what you're all aiming to be! You can't wait to join You-Know-Who, can you?"

Severus was about to reply…..well beg is a better adjective. But when he looked at Lily's face, some random connection of neuron signals told him the inevitability of it all, it was over, she was done with him. His best friend, the only woman he's ever loved or ever will, was leaving him.

He'd blown it, there was no point in begging, pleading or screaming. She was right to feel the way she did. He guessed he should have been angry or hurt or betrayed, but those same random neuron signals in his brain connected in the right way a second time and he flashed back to the split second after he'd said the word to her. And remembered the hurt in her eyes. He had no right to feel any of those things, not after what he'd done.

So instead he laughed, he laughed at the hopelessness of the shithole that was Severus Snape's life.

Lily looked at him hard, Severus hadn't laughed in months, and now, now after insulting her after she tried to help his ungrateful skinny ass he was laughing at her.

"You think this is funny ?" She screamed at him.

Severus kept laughing, almost hysterically then he looked at her pools of emerald which were filled with venom toward him. He felt numb now.

"I'm not laughing at you Lily, I'm laughing at…" He trailed off, his hands running through his ebony locks.

"At what ? The fact that you're really as terrible as Mary and the rest say you are, Snivellus" She threw that last jibe at him for extra hurt. But it didn't register to Severus to feel it.

"Yes" He answered calmly, the numbness still there. Severus realized that this was the end. And like a muggle movie scene, where a soldier at a firing squad enjoys a cigarette before he no longer enjoys anything. Severus took Lily's hate in stride because he'd know it would be the last thing she'd ever give him.

His answer caught her off guard.

When she didn't say anything he figured he'd just confess what he felt, after all it wasn't like she'd talk to him ever again, so why not tell her all the most important things he'd held in that he wouldn't be able to tell her later ?.

"Petunia was right Lily, about me, I'm trash. And…and you're right to be angry at me I just wanna tell you this last thing because I know it's done. I wanna say that I'm sorry, I could tell you that a million times and it still wouldn't be enough, but I am. And that you're right to hate me, but you… you can never hate me more than I hate myself. I want to tell you that you're the most amazing person I've ever met and I know you're gonna go on to do great things, you're gonna, you're gonna change the world someday Lily, all I'm doing, all I've ever is hold you back"

The words were pouring out right now, Severus couldn't have stopped if he tried.

Lily had been about to leave in disgust before Sev said Petunia was right about him being trash. Now she stood there, transfixed almost, by Severus' speech.

"You were my best friend Lily, my only one. Thank you for that, for being there for me when nobody-"

Severus' voice caught and tears dripped out of his coal black eyes, he'd only cried in front of Lily once in all the years he'd known her.

"When nobody else gave a shit, thanks for sticking with me till now. And uhhh lastly I wanna say I love you, I've always loved you and I always will from the moment I saw you in the playground, till the day I die."

Severus stopped and stared at Lily, who's eyes were as wet as well.

"You bastard" She said in a quiet tear filled voice.

Severus just kept looking back.

"You bastard" She shrieked and slapped him hard across the face.

She turned her back to him and ran into the common room. Leaving Severus alone, alone with his numbness.

"Goodnight Lily"

And with that he turned and started the walk back to Slytherin's dorms.

Thanks for reading.