Hello I'm back. Its been awhile. This isn't my best work, but it'll do. Review and complain about it.

Copyright to Sonic Team and Sega. Thanks RAWN for being my beta.

'Okay it's the next scene now!' I announced happily. 'We are at some party that seems to be thrown for no particular reason. Romeo and his friends crash it, and Juliet is there. Action!'

The guys walked onto the stage. It wasn't much to look at, a few hastily aired up balloons littered the floor, and there was some confetti here and there, but they had learned by now not to expect much better. With a sigh, they began their lines.

"Well this party seems to be totally off the hook," Vector said blandly. "There are like so many hot chicks here. What do you think my homies?" Vector's voice was laced in disgust and anger while he read his lines, his eyes blazing, but Shadow responded unfazed.

"Nah dude. I am like still totally pining for that one chick cuz' she's like so super freaking hot and probably has other attributes but mostly the hot thing." Shadow sighed, wishing this could just be over. "You two go hang out somewhere else while I stay here and be emo."

Tails nodded. "All right then. Have fun." He then turned to Vector. "Let's go do something unspecified." Vector nodded his approval before walking with Tails off the stage.

Rouge entered the scene, rolling her eyes briefly before forcing a smile and walking up to Shadow. "You that Romeo guy?" she asked. Shadow nodded. "You that Juliet chick?" "Yep. Let's get married! Like right now." Shadow pondered that for a brief moment before shrugging. "Why not? Also let's skip a bunch of scenes for time reasons and not be whiny little bitches about it and stress out the author." Rouge rolled her eyes once again. "Filibustering, classy. Yeah sure I guess. At least we'll be done sooner."

I turned to glare at the remaining members of the cast. 'That goes for all of you,' I warned, my tone threatening. 'We don't have the time, and I've come down with a case of apathy so we're cutting out the nonessential or boring scenes.'

The cast just nodded their heads, not wanting to enrage someone with the power of fanfiction.

I smiled before continuing with the narration of the play. 'So the young Romeo and Juliet were wed. Without parental consent even though they were both underage, when they had literally just met. Wasn't the past just grand? Anyway, later Romeo was walking with Mercutio and Benvolio when he ran into Tybalt who was angry, for some reason. Maybe Romeo called him fat or something, I don't know, let's watch.'

Vector and Tails hopped up onto the stage while Rouge opted to fly off into the rafters. They diligently kicked off all the balloons before continuing their lines. "Wow is like so tight that we got to take this walk downtown," Vector said. "Yeah," Tails agreed. "I sure hope that nothing bad happens while we're walking down the street."

Suddenly Espio jumped up onto the stage. "I'm Tybalt and now I'm going to like totally do something bad to you while you're walking down this street." Shadow face palmed. "Way to go Benvolio." Shadow glared at the fox before turning to Tybalt. "I'm not going to fight you dude, for reasons I so do not have to tell you. So just get lost."

Espio glared at him. "Well then I'll just fight Mercutio. For some reason." Espio jumped at Vector and they started an impromptu fight. Finally Vector was hit square in the chest.

"Oh no!" he shouted. "That like totally killed me. I'm going die now. Your families suck." Vector lied down on the ground. "I'm dead."

Shadow look at him with disinterest. "Oh no he's dead," he deadpanned. "I'm so sad. I'm going to fight Tybalt now and get revenge." He walked over to Espio and pushed him down. "Oh no I died," Espio shouted before going limp.

I glared at them and started walking towards the stage. "Oh no it's the fuzz!" Tails shouted. "Run Romeo run." Shadow calmly walked away, much to my chagrin.

'I'm the prince guy now, and I'm really ticked that my cousin is dead. And also that other guy I guess. I hereby banish Romeo because I told him that would happen if either of their families got into a fight again in that scene we didn't do. Okay bye now.' I walked back off the stage. 'Next scene!' I yelled.

Rouge grudgingly flew down from the rafters and landed silently on the floor. The others cast her apologetic looks while they left the stage. Rouge sighed and turned towards the cue cards.

"I'm just like so happy that I'm married. I would be like so devastated if something happened to throw a wrench in my marriage or ruin my good mood." I walked up next to her. 'Yeah your cousin died,' I told her. Rouge broke out into obviously fake tears. "Oh no! I loved him so much. Even though we've had literally no screen time together I was super close to him." 'Also the guy who killed him was Romeo and now he's banished.' Rouge broke out into even more obviously fake tears. "That's like really, really, upsetting to me for reasons I don't have to tell you." 'Also we think you've been so for too long so we're marrying you off to that guy you didn't want to get married to. Surprise!' Rouge stared at me in surprise. "Now you're just being a jerk." She sat down and stared at her hands. "What I would do to be holding a dagger right now," she mused.

From offstage someone yelled, "Too soon!" "She's not even real!" Rouge shouted back. "And it hasn't even happened yet!"

I stared at her amused. 'Well the only logical way out of this mess would be for you to fake your death. Then Romeo can come get you, and you can live in exile together. And nobody will notice your missing corpse or anything. It's the most romantic thing ever.'

Rouge thought the idea over. "Sounds good, but let's like only tell Romeo at the last possible moment in a not very secure way. Like that way he won't totally freak out or anything.'

'Alright,' I nodded. 'Pretend to die, and I'll go get Romeo. Toodles.' I quickly rushed off the stage while Rouge shouted. "I'm dead!" I quickly found Shadow. 'Oh Romeo. I'm a messenger. I came to tell you Juliet is dead.' Shadow looked surprised. "Oh no! Since we live in a world where people just die randomly, it makes perfect sense a 14 year old girl just died for no reason. I must go see her, but first I must stop by for some poison for reasons I don't want to tell you."

Shadow quickly ran off. I thought for a moment. 'Wait, I was supposed to tell you she's just faking it. Oh well, I'm sure it won't end too badly.' With my lines done, I quickly ran to go get the poison for Shadow's big death scene.

I picked up the bottle and walked over to him. 'Here you go, be sure to drink all of it.' He looked at me warily. "You're not going to poison me like you did to Amy are you?" he asked suspiciously. I rolled my eyes. 'You guys need to let that go. It happened like a whole story ago.'

Sonic stared at me skeptically. "So what you're saying is it's not poison?" His eyes bore into mine and I let out an annoyed sigh. 'Fine!' I snapped. 'Don't go with the perfectly harmless poison. Drink nothing for all I care. Make the play look bad. Whatever!' I went off to a corner to sulk.

Shadow shrugged and walked over to where Rouge lay. "You're dead and that sucks. I drink poison and I die." He made a series of choking noises and fell to the ground. I rolled my eyes at his lack of method acting.

Rouge rose and looked over to where Shadow lay. "Oh how sad is it that my boyfriend died? I mean it's a total bummer." Rouge bit her lip. "On the one hand, killing for love is so overrated. On the other hand if I live, I have to marry Paris…"

"Wait," Knuckles said. "I didn't die." Rouge stared at him. "You did now, just lie down." The red echidna shrugged and fell to the floor. Rouge stared at her hands. "Oh happy nonexistent dagger." Then she slumped to the floor.

I got up and dragged Sonic to the front. 'Oh no! Your son is dead.' Sonic looked at Shadow, his face emotionless before shrugging. "Oh well. I still have that other kid. Ben or something."

'And on that happy note,' I announced. 'I think we should leave before we ruin this classic anymore. Goodnight folks.'