That night, GLaDOS found herself wandering aimlessly around the endless corridors of Aperture Science in her android form. She had no idea why, or where she was going. All she knew was that she was… confused. It was hard to think straight and for the first time in her life she was finding it difficult to focus. Her thoughts were in disarray.

What the… hell was she doing?

Suddenly, she awoke from her trance and found herself standing in front of her test subject's room. Unconsciously, something had brought her here on this dark, gloomy night. Perhaps it was fate.

Without even thinking, she opened the door to her subject's room – Chell's room. Perhaps the door should have had a lock, she thought at the back of her mind. Inside, she saw her test subject lying fast asleep in the queen-size bed she'd made for her.

Almost as if in a dream, the artificial intelligence stood in the doorway for several minutes, watching the dark-haired woman sleep, transfixed in place. Then, still as if in a dream, she took her first step into the room, violating its sanctity by entering completely without permission. Everything that was sacred and permissible she was throwing to the wayside, in doing so breaking every bond of trust she'd formed with the female over the past couple months in one fell swoop.

Unhurriedly, step by step, she approached the bed, finally finding herself watching down at her test subject sleeping peacefully. Not sure why she did it, GLaDOS brushed a strand of hair from the sleeping subject's face behind her ear. The girl let out a small sound but didn't wake up. Her skin felt soft and warm.

Glancing at the edge of the blanket drawn over the brunette for warmth, the AI's eyes were caught on the sight of the woman's bare, exposed neck. Slowly her fingertips traced across the subject's cheek, over the slope of her chin, coming to rest on the woman's throat, feeling her pulse through her artificial skin. She realized she only needed to close her hands around her unsuspecting subject's neck and squeeze… If she did that, all of the troubling thoughts making her feel restless and uneasy would simply disappear.

Slowly, she stroked the brunette's smooth skin as she tentatively brought her hand to gently rest around the precious windpipe her test subject needed to breathe.

Her thoughts were a whirlwind. Never in her time as an omnipotent AI had she felt such an internal conflict within her processing unit. Why was she hesitating? Why did she feel wrong for what she was about to do? Why did her chest hurt when she looked at her test subject lying there completely helpless with her hand wrapped around her neck, utterly at her mercy? …Why did she feel sad?

Just as she felt her head was about to explode, the woman sleeping blissfully unaware of the intrusion into her apartment mumbled something incomprehensible in her sleep and exhaled contently, with a happy smile spreading across her face. GLaDOS stood over her test subject eyes wide in terror. Her hand was shaking.

What was she doing? Chell was her friend. She remembered the surge of emotion that had shot through her when she'd lunged to grab the woman's hand to save her from being sucked into space. The blissful expression on her subject's face made her recall the moment they'd shared when each of them in turn had closed their eyes for the other. The two of them had stood so close. That was the first time GLaDOS had talked to the female like that. She hadn't known where to put her eyes and what to do with her hands. She'd been… so nervous. But then Chell had smiled at her. And she'd smiled, too.

…What was she doing?

In horror, GLaDOS stepped away from the bed and alternated between looking at her hand and her subject sleeping peacefully in bed, thinking about what she'd almost just done. What had come over her? How could she have almost done something like that? What kind of person would murder their friend in their sleep? How…? How could she have…? GLaDOS decided to NEVER come in Chell's room again without permission. EVER.

…Then another part of her awoke and she looked at Chell, seeing the murderer who had ruthlessly torn her to pieces, piece by piece, and thrown her parts into the incinerator; the mute lunatic who had pressed the Stalemate Resolution Button and mercilessly ripped her core straight from her body with all of her sensors and receptors still connected, causing unimaginable, inescapable pain that haunted GLaDOS to this day. …The woman who had lovingly applied soap on her shell and washed her clean, toweling her dry with a soft, warm towel with a faint, gentle smile on her lips.

GLaDOS screamed inside her head and bolted out of the room, racing down the corridor before slumping into a pile on the floor, leaning against a wall. She felt murder boiling inside her, but at the same time she saw herself as a monster. Why did she want to hurt Chell? …Why hadn't she killed her already? She should waltz down there right now and finish the job; seize her subject's wrists, pin down her body with her own, and slowly, ever so slowly, squeeze the life out of her as she watched her subject toss around helpless, confused, and most of all… betrayed; pleading GLaDOS to stop with her eyes, unable to utter a single sound, before finally turning completely pale, the life draining out of her, and going completely rigid after first convulsing uncontrollably as she died. GLaDOS licked her lips, imagining the sight of her lifeless test subject lying motionless in her arms with her eyes staring glazed into emptiness.

A long, soft moan escaped from GLaDOS's lips as she lay collapsed on the floor, resting against the pristine white wall of her facility.

What the hell was wrong with her? How could she think of such things and gain pleasure from it?

…

What was the issue? She had always been like this. The moment that brought testing to its flaming climax was when the test subjects were burned alive in the glorious pit of fire. Without that grand finale she would have been left feeling empty and unfulfilled. That should have been obvious! There was nothing more gratifying than mercilessly taking the helpless test subjects' lives after first toying with their feelings and emotions and lulling them into the false security that she was their only friend in this world, that they could actually trust the calm, reassuring voice that was the only semblance of humanity their confused, fragile minds could latch onto. Was there a thing more delicious in this world than the agonized screams of test subjects burning alive simply because she desired it? Their utter helplessness and the despair in their eyes during their last moments was truly a beautiful sight to behold.

No, all of this had been for science, hadn't it?

For science? How amusing. GLaDOS LOVED being in control, loved having power, loved manipulating others, breaking their will and making them submit to her and being able to do whatever she wanted to them after that. Science? That was just a miserable excuse to justify everything she did. As deep as her love for science ran, her desire to assert her absolute will onto others trumped even it. What was this thing with Chell? Being friends with a human? How pathetic. What use did she have for friends? Instead of killing her, she should tie her up and subject her to unimaginable physical and mental agony that would leave her mind shattered like a beautiful yet fragile stained glass since she now had this body. The girl did not deserve to simply die after what she'd done to her. She should be made to experience the most devastating horrors and ceaselessly beg GLaDOS to kill her for hours on end before she finally showed her the mercy of ending her life. The lying, deceiving fake mute should be brought to the very edge of her life, pleading GLaDOS's name as she took her last breath, grateful she was finally allowed to die.

Oh, just imagining that breathtaking sight nearly caused GLaDOS's circuits to overload.

GLaDOS slapped herself across the face. Hard. What the FUCK was wrong with her? How could she think about her friend like this? She was utterly disgusted with herself, and that was a new feeling for GLaDOS. The woman sleeping soundly down the hall in her room, she… was special to GLaDOS. She wouldn't lay a finger on her unless Chell betrayed or provoked her. Not a finger. This ugly side of her she had discovered, the one blind with murder, rage and malice, had to be the corruption in her system the scientists had gone on and on about and so desperately tried to fix. Why had she never noticed it before herself? Did it have something to do with Chell? Was it because of the internal conflict the woman had stirred within her that she now saw the part of her that was twisted and warped? Had she always been messed up inside, or had something changed her? Was the part she was now trying to fight against the original her or the corruption? Or were the thoughts she was now having the corruption? Was it Chell that had corrupted her? Corrupted her heart.

GLaDOS screamed and took her head between her hands. Why was this happening? Why? She felt like she was dying. What had that woman done to her? Why was it that when she thought about hurting her, her chest ached?

Did it have something to do with this body? Had it been a mistake to put herself in a body that was an analog to a human? She had also been getting closer to the human. Lately, every time she talked to her, she felt strange. And she didn't like it. She didn't understand what that feeling was. That insecurity made her feel uncomfortable around the woman. She did her best to hide her uneasiness, but especially in her android body that was difficult to do, because she still wasn't accustomed to how expressive her new face was and if she wasn't careful she risked giving away what she was really thinking and feeling. In her desperation to hide her confusion, she often found herself snapping at the other woman for no reason, in order to mask her inability to respond to the emotions the brunette evoked in her.

Why had she asked her to be her friend? She hadn't meant to say it, but when Chell had rejected her she'd for some reason felt a tug somewhere deep inside her and it had just slipped out without thinking.

"Of course she doesn't want to be your friend," she'd thought. "Who'd want to be friends with someone who abuses them, shows no concern for their well-being and insults them at every opportunity they can get?"

To her surprise, Chell had agreed. The computer's circuits had nearly stalled. Trying to contain her excitement had taken all of the willpower she could muster. She couldn't understand why she'd been so happy. But she had. The only time she'd been happier had been today when Chell had come back to her chamber and the two of them had apologized to each other and Chell had so gently and affectionately washed her clean. Although, she hadn't apologized, had she? She had never apologized to the girl.

After she'd had her test subject forcefully thrown against the back of the glass elevator and tried to crush her leg between the elevator doors, she'd watched her subject tend to her wounds alone in the shower, screaming out in pain and sobbing quietly, curled up on the floor. She'd witnessed her pain and sorrow, and for the first time regretted inflicting pain on another person. Watching her weep, she'd wanted to turn on the speakers and say something – anything – to console her subject, but she couldn't find the words. Watching the girl slowly remove the glass shards from her back, one by one, something inside her had ached every time she'd pulled out another piece, like it'd been her that was hurt.

Because of the voice of her newfound conscience, she'd felt sorry for what she'd done. She'd wanted to apologize, but she just didn't know how. She'd given Chell the room, but that hadn't been enough. She needed to tell Chell she was sorry, say it. Tell her how she felt. But every time she tried, the words wouldn't come out and she ended up throwing one of her sarcastic remarks in the girl's face instead. Nothing of the way she behaved helped the brunette understand how she felt, she was sure. No matter how much she tried to make it up to her with small gestures and subtle acts of kindness, if she didn't say the words to Chell while looking her in the eyes, her feelings would never reach the other woman. She needed to talk to her and ask for her forgiveness – tell her she was deeply sorry.

GLaDOS let out another scream. Her body was burning up. Her processes were running out of control. Was she malfunctioning? Why did her chest feel like it was being torn apart? Why did it hurt so much? What was it about that woman that made her have these feelings she didn't want to have? These feelings of sadness, guilt and remorse. She didn't want to feel like this! She'd never asked for this! Any of it! Why couldn't things just be like they'd been before? She'd just tested and everything had been fine. She hadn't felt like her heart was being suffocated when she thought of her test subject being in pain and having to suffer. Her dear, precious test subject. Her best friend. Her only friend.

Everything was rapidly spinning out of control and to prevent herself from completely falling apart GLaDOS emptied her mind and tried to calm herself down. She visualized taking virtual deep breaths like humans always seemed to do when they were panicked and surprisingly it seemed to help.

Nothing like this had ever happened to her before. She could almost feel an imaginary heart pounding in her chest. Its every beat was strong and dominating, demanding the listener's full attention. GLaDOS felt an incredibly strong connection to the present with every virtual heartbeat, and gradually she felt herself beginning to calm down, her imaginary heartbeat slowing to a soft thumping.

GLaDOS closed her eyes.

Gradually, she began to regain some control over herself. How had this happened to her? Opening her eyes, she glanced up at the ceiling. The familiar, white ceiling of Aperture Science. Her home, and her prison.

GLaDOS let out a heavy sigh.

How had it come to this?

Everything had slowly changed after she'd saved Chell from space. She'd changed. After what had happened, what she'd done, she'd slowly began to see the human through different eyes. As much as she hated to admit it to herself, she liked talking to her. Sure, their conversations were incredibly mundane, but as much as she pretended to hate it, she always made time for the girl when she asked for it.

She had never really had anyone to talk to before, not really. Perhaps she had never realized that secretly she'd always been… lonely, yearning for someone to talk to and share small, simple, insignificant moments with. But there was more. She felt that that someone had to be Chell. Ever since she'd saved her from space against her better judgement – acting on instinct rather than rational thought for the first time in her life – she'd felt a connection between the two of them. No, even before that. When she was a potato. Working together with the human had… introduced her to a different side of interacting with others, and a different side of her test subject. She'd seen what testing was like for her and what it was like trying to desperately work for something when your life was in danger. Working together with the female for a brief time, life had actually felt kind of exhilarating.

Then, when she'd gotten back into her body, she'd decided it was best to let the girl go. Not just for Chell, but herself as well. She wasn't good for the girl, but moreover she was concerned about what was happening to her and what the female's persisting presence might do to her. But then it seemed fate had intervened. The girl couldn't leave, and GLaDOS suddenly didn't find it in herself to just kill her, right after she'd said the woman could go. She should have seen it then that it was a bad idea to let the girl stay. The old her wouldn't have even hesitated to kill her. Now here she was, lying on the floor confused and in agony over what she'd almost done.

GLaDOS sighed. Something that had only become a habit recently.

Why had she let the female stay? Whatever she was doing to her was spreading fast. At first it had been her voice. Something about it had caused this small tingle inside her. Small, but just enough to make her want to keep talking to the woman. Then, when she'd finally felt she'd managed to get a grip on her old self again and been ready to throw the former subject out of her facility, the girl'd promised something in her desperation that had taken the computer by complete surprise and made her hesitate: She'd promised to kill the bird for her. That was the first considerate thing anyone had ever promised to do for her. It had made something deep within the enormous supercomputer's hull resonate. Perhaps that's what humans called when their heart "skipped a beat". It had almost felt like someone had cared for her for the first time in her life.

GLaDOS had known that the woman had only been trying to save herself, but still she hadn't been able to not feel touched that the girl would be willing to do something like that for her. Genuinely touched.

She should have killed the girl then and there. Put an end to it right that instant. She shouldn't have felt that sort of things. She wasn't supposed to have that sort of feelings. God, things had only gotten worse after that. Was it already too late for her?

This body. Why had she built this body? This body was a mockery of who she was. Why was she pretending to be human? Why was she pretending to be something she was not? Because of some twisted delusion the woman had implanted in her head? No. For her. HER.

God. Had she truly craved talking with the woman on a more personal level to such an extent that she'd subconsciously modeled her new mobile platform after a human for that very reason? No, ever since Caroline's memories had resurfaced, there'd been a primal desire somewhere deep within her core to understand more about herself and the human part of her. A desire to understand humans, and in the process, her test subject.

She could have never predicted how confused her new body would make her. Uploading herself into it filled her with thoughts and emotions she couldn't understand, questions she had never asked herself before.

She didn't know who she was anymore.

Whenever she was alone in this body, she was filled with this incredible uncertainty. But whenever Chell was with her, all of those thoughts just disappeared. She forgot all about her troubles and she could just be herself. When she was with Chell, she forgot about everything else and tuned out the rest of the world around them. When the two of them talked, it was just them. GLaDOS forgot everything about the half a dozen other processes she was running in the background and the woman standing in front of her had her full, undivided attention. Her voice, words and presence comforted GLaDOS and helped her with the restlessness she felt inside. It was like she wasn't alone, even if she couldn't talk about her troubles.

She wished she had the courage to hold out her hand and take the girl's into hers and be able to feel her squeeze it gently in support. GLaDOS had this feeling inside her that she was longing to find someone she could connect with. She was starting to feel that that someone could be Chell. Perhaps there could be someone she could open up to and tell what was really going on inside her head. A friend. Someone you could trust, someone who cared about you, someone you shared things with.

GLaDOS had never let anyone in. Not even close. Her heart had always been closed off from the world. Protected, safe. …Isolated. No one ever got close to her and she never got close to anyone. No one ever saw her real self. It was only now that she wondered for the first time if that made her sad…

What was wrong with being alone? No one could hurt her that way. Look at her now. She was hurting right now because of Chell. It was because she'd let her stay. If she'd forced her to leave, she wouldn't have been in pain right now. None of these confusing thoughts would have been in her head and she would have been fine. It would have been better if she'd never entered her life. Now it felt like the world was falling apart and she didn't know what to do. She was lost and alone and scared. Scared because she was alone; scared because she couldn't understand. She was falling into a dark abyss and she felt helpless, weak. The only light at the end of the tunnel was the thought that somehow Chell could help her. That somehow she could tell what was wrong with her and how to fix her.

Why was this happening to her? Why did she feel so helpless? Why was she so confused? Why wouldn't the pain stop? Why, why, why?

She felt so broken. Somehow the only thing helping her from completely falling into the abyss was the image of the girl's smiling face in her mind. It was a rare sight, but recently she'd began to see it more often as Chell had began to open up to her more. Some nights she would come into her chamber seeking company and the two of them would talk. Just talk. Of nothing in particular, but sometimes they would talk like that long into the night, drifting from one topic to another and forgetting everything else. It was during those moments when Chell was feeling at ease around the AI that she let her guard down and allowed the computer to sometimes catch a glimpse of a smile without realizing it herself. It was an innocent, pure, honest smile. Just thinking of that smile made GLaDOS…

What was wrong with her? Did she CARE about this woman? Since when had she, GLaDOS, cared about a human? Humans were disgusting, filthy, treacherous, deceitful creatures. All they would do was hurt you if you let them get too close. Surely Chell would only use her and then toss her aside once she was done with her if she was foolish enough to think that she could trust her.

But when she thought about her… What were these feelings? What was it about her? WHY COULDN'T SHE KILL HER? Why did she feel like her insides were being torn apart at the thought of hurting Chell – her friend? Her friend. Her friend. Her friend. Her dear friend.

The image of the girl standing in front of her in her chamber with her eyes closed entered GLaDOS's mind. It had been a breathtaking sight. She – Chell – had put her trust in her. At that moment the thought of hurting that oh-so-innocent-looking girl hadn't even crossed her mind.

And it shouldn't have.

Because wanting to hurt others was wrong.

The dark thoughts looming in her mind – they were the corruption!

At that moment, the AI's virtual brain felt like it was going to short-circuit. She screamed as her head was filled with voices – millions of voices. All the cores they'd attached to her, all the things the scientists had said, the screams of her test subjects – but loudest of all Chell's voice, talking to her in her sweet voice, telling her to be nicer to others… to be nicer to her.

That's what tipped GLaDOS over the edge. Her tormented, agonizing synthetic scream went on, transforming into a cross between a long, relieved sigh and a subdued, satisfied moan. After the last whisper of sound had escaped from her artificial lips, the dark-haired android sat crumpled up on the floor, eyes half-closed and a blissful expression on her face.

GLaDOS felt like part of her soul had been purified. Like she had been released from the shackles of the dark part of her she hadn't even realized had been controlling her. The darkness… it was still there. GLaDOS could feel it. But now for the first time she felt like she was truly awake, like her own voice finally managed to cut through all the voices in her head.

Like she was… alive.

For several minutes the android just sat there on the floor, perfectly content with no conscious thoughts running through her head. This feeling was… something new. GLaDOS savored it. Every last bit of it. Perhaps she was just in a weird state of mind right now and tomorrow everything would be back to normal, but at this very moment she felt… serene. She had found an inner calm and perhaps even caught a glimpse of what happiness felt like. Whatever it was that she was feeling, it was very comforting; warm and gentle. She wished it could go on forever.

As the feeling eventually began to fade, GLaDOS slowly got up from the floor and started making her way back toward her chamber. She was exhausted and needed rest, but for the first time she was looking forward to placing herself in sleep mode, somehow knowing tonight it would feel pleasant – different.

Emotionally and mentally drained, she fell into her cushioned pod which she had lowered into a horizontal position. Switching the timer from the normal two hours to last until morning, she grabbed one of the larger extra-plush pillows and cuddling it tightly in a fetal position she fell asleep almost instantly. It was the first night she slept in her android body without switching back to the body she was born in. Clutching her pillow tightly throughout the night, GLaDOS kept mumbling something softly in her sleep and moving around, but like always, when she woke up the next morning, she couldn't recall having had any dreams. She knew however that she had slept peacefully for the first time in her life.

A/N: I have no idea where this came from.

None of this chapter was originally part of my plans for the story, but when this thing came to me it way too good not to use. I've actually felt a desire to add some additional depth to what was already in the story for a while now, so this chapter helped me with that goal.

The chapter is a lot different from anything else I've written up to this point. There are a couple of moments where it gets pretty dark, and I like that. Writing darker material is something I would like to explore more in the future. It is demanding, but also very rewarding. While writing the chapter I also got to experience a side of GLaDOS I've never seen before and that gave me a lot to think about. I feel the chapter opened up a lot of new possibilities for me to explore her character.

I apologize that the chapter took way longer than I had anticipated, but I had much less time to work on it than I had hoped and this was a chapter that I really wanted to try to make feel right so I took my time with it. I usually write sparingly from GLaDOS's perspective because I believe that less is more, and so instead of writing, most of my time actually went to making sure I wasn't saying too much or something I would regret later on. I'm sure there's still room for improvement, but I believe that I did a pretty good job trying to do justice to the chapter.

I hope the chapter was to your liking and worth the wait. Since it's such a different chapter, if you have any thoughts on it you'd like to share, I'd love to hear them. The last chapter got a lot of reviews and I'm glad for that. We also recently broke 250 followers for this story. That is insane. Thank you. I would also like thank Nisha for drawing fanart for the story. This is the first time someone has done something like that, so it certainly was a surprise I didn't know to expect. Thank you.

Lastly I would like to mention that I've created a Twitter account dedicated to my fanfiction. I haven't really used Twitter much myself, but I know that many of you don't have an FFN account and that Twitter would be more convenient for you for getting in touch with me. So if you would like to tell me what you think of my stories, send a few words of encouragement, or just ask me something you are curious about, my username is DeepDarkDepths. I've set up the account so that you can send me Direct Messages even if we both aren't following each other, so if you want to keep your messages private and don't want to worry about the character limit, you can send me a DM.

I'm not asking you to follow me, but if a decent number of you do start following me on Twitter, I might start posting occasional progress updates and other random stuff on there. There are also some questions I've always wanted to ask you, but FFN hasn't really offered a good platform for authors and readers to have a conversation, so Twitter might be good for that.

Anyway, that's all for now. Sorry, but I can already tell you that the next chapter is going to be months away. I currently have very little time to write and I might write one or two chapters for other stories before coming back to this one again, so you'll sadly have to wait awhile. I will have more time to write hopefully six months from now, but for a while longer you'll have to make do with infrequent updates.

Thank you for reading and being patient.