A/N: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SANJI!

This fic was inspired by something my mom says to me and my siblings. You can pretty much guess if you read it XD

THERE SERIOUSLY AREN'T ENOUGH ZEFF AND SANJI FICS. IT MAKES ME SAD. I'VE DECIDED THAT I WILL CONTRIBUTE TO THIS LITTLE BARREN CORNER OF THE FANDOM. EXPECT MORE.

In this fic, Sanji's supposed to be 13.

Disclaimer: I don't own nothin' :D

~And with that said, let this epic tale begin...!~

(HAAAZAR!)

"Goddammit, Patty!" Zeff yelled as he looked down at the broken dish on the floor, an entire plate of food gone to waste. "The hell's wrong with you? You were supposed to take this plate to table six!"

"Hey, it wasn't my fault! I ain't no waiter!" Patty put up his hands up in defence, and then pointed an accusing finger at Carne. "He's the one who bumped into me!"

"What!? Was not! Don't blame me for your own stupidity!"

Sanji sighed and continued to dice his tomato. In the 3 years he had been working with these idiots, nothing had ever changed. There was always some kind of fight going on in the kitchen, there was always some dissatisfied customer in the dining room, and there was always a crease in between Zeff's brows. Same old same old.

"You see this, Patty?" Zeff pointed at a wrinkle on his forehead, "This is you." This made Sanji stop chopping away at the red fruit to look up at the conversation (he knew better than to cut without looking)

. Carne snickered, and the owner turned on him instead, pointing at a different crease. "Don't be so smug. This one's you, Carne." he gave one last disapproving glance to the mess on the floor, before walking away. "Clean this mess up!"

After Zeff had disappeared from sight, the young boy approached his two co-workers. He tugged on Patty's sleeve to get his attention. When the large man looked down at him, he asked, "The geezer... What does he mean by 'this is you'?"

Patty smirked. "What he means by that... is... well-"

"That we stress him out so much that it's sped up his aging process." Carne explained. "According to him, each one of us is responsible for one of his wrinkles."

Sanji blinked a few times. "So, does this mean that I'm responsible for one too?"

Carne chuckled and patted his back. "I'm sure you are, 'little eggplant'."

"Alright, lil' eggplant. Bedtime." Zeff announced.

"Since when do you get to decide what time I go to bed?" Sanji asked, cigarette dangling lazily from between his lips. Patty and Carne had to cover their mouths to hide their smirks, lest they want a peg leg to the teeth.

"Since you were 10." Zeff said bluntly. "Now, off with you." he grabbed the child's arm, ready to steer him to the bunk room if need be. Suddenly, the boy got very close to his face, and exhaled a large puff of smoke from his mouth. The smoke flooded the older chef's breathing space, making him cough violently. Sanji smirked at his minor victory.

Zeff glared. "You see this, Sanji?" he pointed at the angry crease between his eyebrows, "And this," his finger moved to a wrinkle under his eye, "and this," then to one under his other eye, "and these?" he gestured to a few on his forehead.

"Yeah."

"All you."

A/N: Short fic be short :I

I appreciate reviews :D