Thanks to AreiaCananaid, Guest me, and GraceCambiri for their reviews and suggestions! Sorry for the late update! Happy New Year everyone! Sorry for any spelling/grammar mistakes.

Disclaimer: I don't own Ranger's Apprentice, Staples, A&W Root Beer, or Allstate.

Staples (Thanks to Guest AWESOMENESS)

"Halt!" Will called.

Halt sighed from his chair across from the fire. He had been reading a letter from Crowley about a pending mission for him and Will. His apprentice was in his bedroom cleaning. Halt sighed again and called back, "What?"

"My clothes won't fit in the drawer!"

Halt rolled his eyes and eased up from his comfy chair and made his way to the doorway of Will's bedroom. "Have you folded them?" he asked in a could-you-be-that-stupid-to-forget-that-minor-detail voice.

Apparently, (and surprisingly) Will wasn't that stupid. "I folded them and I tried putting them in the drawer and they won't fit!" Will exclaimed in a frustrated voice.

Halt examined the medium-sized pile of Will's clothes then walked over and opened the top drawer in the wide two-drawer dresser. Sure enough, it was empty. "Maybe," he said, "and this is just a suggestion, but you could put your shirts in this drawer and your trousers in the bottom drawer. . . ."

"Oh. . . ." Will said and did as Halt had suggested. "That was easy!"

"But was it?" Halt muttered as he headed back to his chair by the fireplace.

A&W Root Beer (Thanks to Book Soldier)

Erak laughed loudly as he toasted his frothing cup of ale with a number of other Skandians. It was the annual Midwinter Bash, which other countries thought as barbaric because all the Skandians did was get together and drink, dance gruesomely, and make fun of people. The Skandians thought it was good fun though.

Erak, as oberjarl, was required to host a Midwinter Bash party in Hallasholm. It had been underway for several hours now, and almost everyone was roaring drunk.

"Hey, Eraksh!" Borsa slurred. "Your ruling sucksh! You're terrible. Like a . . . a fat muddy pig who'sh taken lotsh of . . . tha- that drug. . . . Warmweed! Yesh, yesh, you're a . . . a fat high cow! Or did I say pig? Or goat. . . ."

Erak glared at Borsa. "Shut up!" he roared and threw the contents of his mug in Borsa's face. The foam from the ale covered Borsa's face, and seemed to cover even more of his face as he tried to drunkenly rub it away.

Svengal smirked. "Oh, that frosty mug sensation."

Allstate Mayhem Commercial parody (Thanks to paisley15)

Halt glanced up from his coffee as he heard Abelard and Tug nicker a greeting and hoofs clomp on the ground toward the cabin. Halt frowned, wondering who it was. Then Will, who was outside practicing, shouted, "Hullo, Crowley!"

Halt got up and went outside. He raised an eyebrow as Crowley dismounted and handed the reins to Will, who lead the horse to the stables behind the cabin. Halt glanced at his old friend. "What are you doing here?"

Crowley grinned. "I have a job for you."

Halt led the commandant inside and started to make coffee. "Oh? Why didn't you just send a letter?"

"Because this way you might not outright refuse."

Halt didn't like how this was sounding. "And what is this job?"

"Allstate has asked us to make a Mayhem commercial for them. And I want you, Will, and whoever else you want to employ to make it."

"What?!" Halt asked. "I'm not making a stupid commercial just because some insurance company wants one!"

"Right," Crowley said. "You'll do it because Will is looking forward to it and you know what he's like when something he's looking forward to doesn't happen."

Halt groaned and handed Crowley a cup of coffee. "Fine."

THE NEXT WEEK:

"Ready, set, action!" Crowley said.

"Hello," Will said. "I'm an annoying apprentice who asks too many questions." He sat in the passenger seat of the car Halt was driving. "Halt, is one plus one two?"

"Yes," Halt said rolling his eyes.

"What is Copernicus most famous for?"

Halt opened his mouth to answer, but Will cut him off with another question.

"Halt, are you an autotonsorialist?"

"What?" Halt asked angrily.

Will turned back to the camera. "Now my mentor is emotionally compromised."

Halt fake-swerved and a crash sounded and it looked like he smashed into a parked car. "Whoops. Why do I get all the idiot apprentices?" He pulled away and continued driving.

Pauline walked up to the severely damaged car with a shocked expression. "And if you have car rate insurance, you could be paying for this yourself. So get Allstate and you can save money and be better protected from Mayhem like me," Will said.

The camera cut away from them and the Allstate logo started to play across on the camera as Erak said in a deep voice, "Mayhem is everywhere, so get an Allstate agent. Are you in good hands?"

"And cut!" Crowley said.

"Wow, Halt," Will said. "Where did you get the idea for that commercial?"

"Oh, let's just say I have some experience with the situation."

Hope you liked it! By the way, autotonsorialist means someone who cuts their own hair or looks like they cut their own hair. Sorry again for the late update! Please review!