A/N Hello, and welcome to chapter seven, the final chapter, of Devils and Devilry!
So, here we are, at the end. The last episode has come and gone, and Being Human has floated up to the enormous TV graveyard in the sky (say hi to Merlin, won't you?). But... I'm not quite finished. There's a few things I need to do before I click 'Complete' on this fic and consign it to the 'Gosh, I actually finished this fic' section of my fics (take a look at my list of fics and notice how many are complete). Well, actually, a lot of things. So, here's the 'lots of things'. Also, if you've reviewed this story, you might find a special surprise at the bottom. It promises to be slightly underwhelming. And if you haven't reviewed this story, there's a special surprise at the bottom which I absolutely didn't tell you about in an author note one time.
Anyway, I have another author note at the bottom (the joy!), so I'd better stop rambling. Here's the final chapter, 'The End?'!
THE SERIES 5 EPISODE LEADERBOARD
1. The Last Broadcast
2. No Care, All Responsibility
3. The Greater Good
4. The Trinity
5. Pie and Prejudice
6. Sticks and Rope
I had a hard time choosing these episodes (not giving them a score this time didn't help), and I'd imagine this would be fairly controversial in certain places of the internet. Anyway, 'The Last Broadcast' wins because it's a brilliant ending in its own right, without that 'choose your ending' genius of a twist. The last three episode all rank above the first three, but that's not to say that they're all bad - even bottom placed 'Sticks and Rope' was a pretty damn great episode!
CHARACTER OF THE YEAR
Last year, Hal ran home with the trophy for best series four character... but with Hal's bipolar shenanigans in the latter half of the series, naive, arse-kicking ex-werewolf Tom walks home with the award, with Alex a close second. And in third, it's none other than Crumb. Just don't give him aspirin. If you give him aspirin, it's actually murder.
DOUCHE-BAG OF THE YEAR
Anyone who's read a chapter of this fic may guess who will scoop the not-so-coveted Douche-Bag of the Year award... yep, it's Hal. No, not really, it's Mr Dominic 'I don't have any friends or hobbies' Rook. From stabbing a man in the eye with a pen, to locking a bloodthirsty Crumb in a room with his only relatives, from letting Bobby transform in the hotel, from sending Natasha to play to Tom's huge naive side and destroy the bromance, and from resigning from his job the second he got it back... Rook had it all. I mean, he even beat out the Devil in the evil stakes... how is that even possible?
MORAL OF THE SERIES
If you're a supernatural being, being human is hard. But if you wait nicely until the opportunity to kill the Devil and remove your curses arises, you can actually be human. But only if you accept that it's probably a dream.
THE UNSUNG HEROES
There's a few characters that sadly, slipped the net in terms of letters. But even though most people have, we haven't forgotten them. Here's the three unsung heroes of Being Human series five:
Lady Catherine - The werewolf queen who ended up in the wrong side of a ritual to banish the Devil. It happens.
Patsy - The eternally stressed out manager/part time Hal-fangirl of the Barry Grand Hotel, who ended up bleeding her eyes out as Captain Hatch delivered a supervillain speech to the probably oblivious Patsy. Still, it was probably worth it.
Alan - Ex-Man-in-Grey turned vampire who survived for a whole twenty minutes of screentime as a vampire. Even Wyndham of all people did better, and he died offscreen.
And uh... that's it. I blame budget cuts, if you ask me.
REVIEWERS: THANK YOU
So, here's a personal thanks to everyone who reviewed this story!
AGoodOmen: reviewed every chapter! AGoodOmen has been there since the start of the fic, writing pages after pages really, really long reviews. Which is good. Also, Omen came up with one of the best crossover ideas I've heard in a while: Hal solves cases with John Watson in the late 1800s. Make it so, Whithouse.
BloodStainedFingers: reviewed every chapter apart from the first one: Bloodstained's (you don't mind if I call you that, I hope) also the only person to have not only reviewed my series four fic (as they went out), but returned to write reviews for this fic. Why would someone want to do that? I honestly don't know, but thanks a lot for your support!
OnceOrTwiceAMinuteAllSummer: reviewed three chapters: One of the first people to review the fic, OnceOrTwice has been there before the fic even got posted, which is pretty neat. Also, you were the first person to tell me that you liked the blood puns... you may or may not be regretting typing those words out back in chapter one now.
IHeartHalYorke'xo: reviewed two chapters The most recent reviewer, having reviewed chapters four and five. Apparently I made you roll on the floor laughing, which is great in one way, surprising in the other, and slightly worrying in the other. Thanks so much for reviewing!
darkestboy: reviewed the first two chapters I don't know if you're still reading this, but you were one of the first reviewers. Also, you read The Angels Stole My Fanfic, which is essentially a thousand awesome points for you (incidentally, The Angels Stole My Fanfic is currently available for reading on my profile. What? Self-promotion? Never!).
RunningInThePouringRain: reviewed once: Again, I don't know if you're still reading this, but thanks for reviewing what I still regard as the weakest chapter (chapter four) - also, you predicted Halex a week before it came true... is there something you're not telling me, Rain?
fang-banger-and-proud: reviewed once: You live where Being Human is filmed, so I'll be eternally jealous of you for that one. Thanks a lot for reviewing!
anna: reviewed once: You asked for the quotes section, and there it was, in all its slightly misjudged glory. Thanks for reviewing the first chapter!
Guest: I will never know who you are, but you were the first ever reviewer for this story. Here, have some virtual milk and cookies!
GENERAL THANK YOUS
Thanks to Kitty O, who again lent her awesome story format to me to use this time around. Go check out all her fics, but especially Restrictions and Reprimands. It's like this, but for Merlin series four. And about ten times better.
Thanks to Stephen Saul and Sarah Dollard, who made the Being Human blog the best place on the internet for six weeks. Honestly, check out those online scenes... you won't regret it.
Thanks to everyone who had a glance at this fic. You're all amazing, except you.
Thanks to everyone who worked on Being Human.
But most of all, thanks to Toby Whithouse. You made us human-er.
A/N Hello old friend, and here we are, at the last page. Wait, wrong show. Again, thanks to much to the reviewers, the alerters and the readers of this fic for making those cold, dark weeknights a little more bearable. So, the future. I'll be uploading three very similar Being Human fics over the next few months... see if you can figure out what they are. The first of them will land in April, so have a look for that. Elsewhere, I'll be posting a story that takes place in the two futures the ending offers, and I'll be posting new chapters of my Doctor Who series seven parody fic The Angels Stole My Fanfic up until the new series on March 30, where I'll be posting a sequel to that fic. So, anyway, that's it. Bye to everyone who's read this - have a great Easter!
PTS out.
THE POST CREDITS SCENE
Window House shook - but there wasn't anything supernatural here. Well, nothing apart from the vampire, the werewolf and the ghost that had moved in a week ago. As for the shaking? It was nothing more than a slightly panicky George, who'd lost his glasses.
''Where the hell are they?'', he demanded in the slightly squeaky voice that only George could muster.
Mitchell sighed. ''Look in the kitchen, George.'', he suggested. Mitchell just wanted a quiet night in (and possibly find time to catch up on the latest The Real Hustle), and George's frantic search was constantly interrupting him.
George didn't go into the kitchen. It wasn't that he didn't trust Mitchell, but he had combed through every inch of the kitchen and he was sure that they weren't there. So, he went for the only place he hadn't checked in: the loo.
Opening the door, he began to search the room, before something caught his eye. His glasses were sitting on the closed toilet seat, on top of a sheet of paper. George frowned. Why the hell would his glasses be on the toilet seat? He picked up his glasses, before noticing the paper. Snatching it, he slid on his glasses before reading the paper.
'I needed your attention, hope you didn't mind me hiding the glasses!', the cheerful message read. And at the bottom, there were just three words - three words that would consign George, his friends and his enemies, to weeks of letters from the same sender: 'Turn page over'.