You're Not Helping

Summary: Ever since joining the team, Tim has always had a slight, okay major, crush on Miss Martian's adoptive little brother. Bart eventually finds out and wants to help set them up. Only if Tim can help the impulsive speedster with a certain Blue Beetle.

Disclaimer: I do not own Young Justice. But I thank the fan-gods on introducing me to Bluepulse/Speedbuggy xD

A/n: Okay...I have deleted Kappa Phantom for a new story to uphold. That's right, I'm doing a Beastboy/Robin on another universe other than Teen Titans. That's right again, I'm going to work on Garfield and Tim :D Plus an added bonus, some Jaime/Bart too! :D It'll feature other pairings too, but it's nothing major. So forgiveness now if you see slash/yaoi and some yuri/fem-slash, plus a lot of corny jokes, random craziness that is OOCness, sexy times and moreover comedy...it's sort of crackish xD So I'll establish the ages, it's supposed that Tim is 16, making Gar like 15. Bart is also 15, as Jaime is 18. This makes Nightwing in his 20s now? So I won't follow through into the events of the show, let's say they did beat the Reach and blah blah blah no spoiling anything. Anyways, think years after that, and the rebuild the Cave and whatnot, and yes, everyone knows about Nightwing's uber secret plan thing with Artemis and Aqualad, and still sort of kind of miffed at him for it. But enjoy it anyways~

"Alright Timmy, you and me,"

Masked eyes glanced up from his reading, staring at the goggle wearing boy grinning down at him stupidly.

"What is it this time Bart? Another one of your failure prankings on Nightwing. Face it man, he knows all your moves," The third Robin spoke boredly, then went back to his reading.

Impulse rolled his eyes and snatched the book away, much to the protest of the Boy Wonder 3.0.

"C'mon you fuddy duddy, don't you wanna totally crash on the crush?" Bart grinned as he watched Tim blush brightly then cackled, "I knew it~! And I totally know who it is!"

"No you don't," Robin hissed out a bit and pulled Bart down on the couch with him, whispering, "No one knows who it is, not even Batman OR Nightwing...definitely not Nightwing,"

He knew very well Nightwing was an epic troller and teases a lot of people with their crushes. He was also very good at blackmailing people.

Bart blinked then looked a bit proud of himself, "Wow, that must make me a crashin' genius huh?"

"No, makes you an idiot, since you don't know who it is," Robin snapped back with a glare.

The speedster hummed, smirking in a challenging way.

"...I'll scream the name out loud if you're so confident about that,"

Robin looked a little nervous, but then scoffed, seeing that the boy was bluffing.

Bart took this as a yes and jumped up on the couch screaming, "ROBIN LOVES BEASTBOY! ROBIN LOVES-"

Robin immediately reached into his utility belt and pulled Impulse down, tied him up taped his mouth and dragged him out of the room and into the hallway, laughing nervously and waving off some of the other teen heroes walking by looking at him like they were crazy. Robin hoped that no one heard. He then immediately threw the impulsive boy into his bedroom and locked the door behind him, then stomped over to him and bonked his head.

"Owww," Bart whined and held his head with a pout.

"You idiot! Everyone heard you!" Robin shouted and waved his hands in a spazzy manner, then folded his arms and glared at him, one that even almost rivaled his mentor, Batman.

"No one heard me," Impulse stuck his tongue out and wink, "No one was really around or close enough to actually hear me...but I'm right aren't I?"

Robin was about to deny it, but then paused at the smugged grin of his friend then pouted.

"A-Am I that obvious?"

"Nah, nah man," Impulse laughed a bit then sat up on Robin's bed, "I'm just really observant with stuff like that...like yesterday-"

Flashback

Nightwing then nodded as he finished his briefing pointed out to Arsenal, Blue Beetle, Robin and Impulse, "Since you four are a good team and all, I'm appointing you Alpha Team once more for a covert mission...and no blowing up anything this time Roy,"

Arsenal folded his arms and grumbled a bit as he faced the other way. Beastboy raised his hand up with a disappointed look.

"Can't I go too Nightwing?"

"Sorry BB, but I need you here to keep an eye out on your sister...She's been...off since the Aqualad thing..." Nightwing sighed then rubbed his temple, "Maybe another time okay buddy?"

Beastboy sighed then nodded sadly, not noticing how Robin peeked over to him with a look of sympathy and...something else. Impulse stopped talking to Jaime and glanced at Robin with a raised eyebrow then grinned widely. Jaime looked at his auburn haired compadre then looked suspicious.

"What's wrong ese?" He whispered as Nightwing continued to talk, and Impulse glanced up at him with his famous cheeky smile.

"Nothing you should worry about," Bart then looked back at Robin again, and silently snickered as he watched Robin check out Beastboy's backside curiously.

Blackmail gold.

End of Flashback

"I was NOT checking out his...his..."

"Ass?"

"Shut up!"

Bart sat on Tim's bed with crossed legs then raised a brow.

"Dude, I don't blame you man, I mean BB's got one fine bubbly ass if you ask me,"

The Robin blushed brightly then slapped Bart's arm angrily, "Do you have to be so blunt with everything?!"

"Well yeah, I mean I'd be the same as you," Bart shrugged then looked a little coy then smiled innocently, "Just pin that cutie down and have my wicked way with him as he squirms and moans as I-"

"ACK! Stopstopstopstop!" Robin fell back into his bed and covering his red hot face, eyes squeezed shut and hands over his ears, "Fa-La-La-La! Cannot hear you! La-Lalalalalalalalalala!"

Bart rolled his eyes and leaned over and uncovered Robin's ears then looked down at him, "Hey, I have an idea,"

Robin stopped his chant and looked up at the green eyed boy then scoffed, "I don't like any ideas you come up with,"

"No no listen," Bart grinned, "I can totally help you get BB,"

"Bart, we don't even know if he swings...well...for the same team," Robin muttered with a raised eyebrow, still blushing.

"Oh~! But I do know," The speedster winked, "And if you doubt me, I'll run down the halls and scream your undying love for him,"

"Okay! Okay!" Robin shouted then sighed, his head lolling to the side, "What's your plan,"

"I'll help you get BB if, and only if..."

Bart paused dramatically, and this ticked off Tim a lot.

"If what?!"

"If you help me with my crush," Bart nodded with a serious face, as Robin choked a laugh.

"You? Have a crush? On who?"

"Since I know your crush, it's only fair you know mine," Bart shrugged, unashamed, "It's Jaime,"

"Blue Beetle? Seriously?" Robin raised a brow then thought a bit then smiled, "Makes sense,"

It was Bart's turn to blush for a bit but then grinned and ruffled Robin's spiked hair.

"Do we have a deal then?"

He placed his hand out to the boy as Robin sat up and looked thoughtful for a moment, half doubtful but half curious. Making up his mind, he shook Impulse's hand then nodded.

"Okay, you have a deal,"

Bart grinned then laughed out loud, "Don't worry Tim! You and Beastboy will be all frolicking through the beach and have your sexy times in no time,"

"Bart? Tim?"

The two looked up to see a certain Hispanic hero peeking into the room with a raised eyebrow.

"Eh, hermanos, what are you upto?"

Bart blushed a bit and sat up immediately, as Tim looked more than embarrassed.

"Uhhhh j-just teaching Tim how to wrestle," Bart explained with a laugh as Tim facepalmed with a groan.

"Bart, he's a martial arts man, he doesn't need to learn how to wrestle," Jaime folded his arms, "Are you guys planning another prank at Nightwing again?"

"Maybe? Yes? Uh..." Bart scratched his cheek then started to nervously blabber, "W-well when you say pranking, it's such a harsh word, I'd prefer it if it was happily making him and everyone else smile HEY! Did you know blue waffle isn't waffles that are blue? Man worst discovery of my life-what are you doing here anyways Jaime, aren't you supposed to be patrolling with Superboy or something not like we're shooing you away or anything just curious you know-"

"Bart" Robin bonked Impulse's head as the speedster stopped and looked at him.

"Yeah?"

"...You're not helping,"

And thus the title and story was born. LOL do you like it? hate it? Please read and review kiddies ;) Thank you!