Woo first thing that I've ever uploaded! QuQ
Well I dunno what else to say...enjoy?

P.S. I most likely will not continue these "one-shots" unless someone wishes for me to.


1. Time Waits for No Man

"Zim wait!"
"...Eh?"

Zim slowly turned around to see who was so desperately calling to him. Oh. It was the Dib.
He continued walking in the other direction, making Dib cry out in exasperation behind him. Finally catching up to the Irken, he struggled to express his annoyance in words as he let out ragged pants.

"Y-You...c-could..have...at...LEAST...waited...for me!"
"Time waits for no man, Dib-thing."
"...H-How the hell does that relate to anything?!"

2. Homework
"DIBBB THINGGG! Zim can't do this "homework"! DO IT FOR ME."
"Maybe if you actually OPENED your Maths book, you would be able to do it..."
"YOU LIE FILTHY HUMAN...eh...FILTH!"
"...Fine whatever. Just don't come whining to me if you get something wrong."

3. Homesick
He sighed as he looked up at the dark purplish night sky, antennae drooping ever so low on his head. Slowly sitting himself on the grass of his backyard, next to his one and only friend, Zim felt tears well up in his glistening ruby eyes. Dib gave him a quick side hug, wrapping his arms across Zim's shoulders. The Irken grudgingly accepted the sign of affection.

"Homesick huh?"

He growled in annoyance. "I am an honored Irken Invader, on a secret mission from the Tallest! I am NOT h-homesick!"

"Zim..it's fine to-" Dib let out a small gasp as he felt a heavy load land on him.

He looked down and saw a whimpering Zim leaning his head against his shoulder. The boy looked apologetically at the alien, stroking his back comfortingly, as he heard a weak sob, growing stronger with each second that passed.

"It's ok to cry Zim...everyone cries once in awhile..."

4. Questions
"...s-seriously Zim! Do you seriously not know what ...IT is?! Don't you have one?!" Dib frantically waved his arms around in confusion.
"...eh? Is it a weapon? Some sort of weakness of the humans...?"
"...Z-Zim..." Dib slapped his hand onto his forehead. "...You're a guy, aren't you?!"
"Of course Zim is male!" He snapped back. "So what is this pen-"
"-S-SHH!...L-Look, all guys have one of them...well HUMAN guys at least."
"I'm not human in case you haven't noticed." Zim scowled up at him.
"... I don't know how Irken anatomy works, ok?!"
"YOU LIE! So what is a-
" -Its the male reproductive organ for humans, alright?!" Dib blurted out. The whole corridor went silent and everyone stared at him in disgust.

5. Dib's Birthday
"It's my birthday today Zim."
"...AHHH...I KNEW THAT! ..ah-aha-ha..." Zim sheepishly grinned while awkwardly laughing. "..I have EVERYTHING set up! YES! I-I just have to go and get...my present..I mean your present...I mean...your present from me! I'll just go get stuff-"
"You forgot didn't you?" Dib said with a deadpan expression. He shook his head and weakly laughed. "Of course. Stupid of me to even THINK that anyone would remember."

And with that, he turned on his heel and walked swiftly away, not giving a glance back. Zim blinked a few times at the boy. Stupid human. He should be honored that Zim even offered to give him a gift...!As much as he was annoyed, he was puzzled himself to why he felt this strange feeling, deep down at the bottom of his squeedily spooch. The feeling of guilt.

6. Lollipop
"Look Zim, it's just a lollipop. It's not going to kill you."
"YES IT WILL! And then you'll be sorry that you even thought of touching that...germy...candy stick."
"Can you try it at least? For me?"
"NO. Are you TRYING to kill the amazing and unstoppable Z-"

Before he could finish his sentence, Dib shoved the lollipop into the unsettled Irken's mouth. Zim's glare softened into a wide-eyed expression as he slowly gave the strange Earth candy a small suck. He looked up at Dib and continued to suck on the lolly, letting a tiny smile pass his face. Dib smiled back.

"You like that, don't you?"

Zim shot him a look of pure annoyance, however he hesitantly nodded once, before quickly turning the other way.

7. Sickening
"OH THAT IS JUST...DISGUSTING! YOU HUMANS SICKEN ME SO MUCH! UGH!"
"...Well then how do Irkens reproduce then?! Don't they do it the same way?!"
"Ew of course not! We take the DNA from the highly respected or successful Irkens, to create clones of ourselves! Isn't it OBVIOUS?!"
"...No?! ...But I have to admit...that is pretty neat. Wait hold up...so do you have any reproductive organs?"
"THIS CONVERSATION IS OVER." Zim stormed off by himself, muttering inaudibly under his breath. Dib simply smirked. What was there to hide?

8. Lies
"My Tallest lied to me."

Dib froze.

"'You are no Irken, let alone Invader!', they said. 'You're just a stupid DEFECTIVE and you are useless to the armada. Stay on that stupid planet until the day you die and never come back to Irk. Never.'"

Dib held his breath as he saw a tear slide down Zim's cheek. He stared at the ground with his ruby eyes, with a look that screamed "Help me." Dib let a soft whisper of the other's name pass his lips.

Knowing that the Irken would prefer to be alone, especially at a time like this, the human started pacing towards the room's exit. He gave Zim one last look back before gently closing the door behind him. The sound of sobbing grew louder.

9. Help
I knew he was an evil little alien...Born only to destroy and kill. But seeing him like this...I couldn't help but let a wave of guilt overcome me. I grabbed his little gloved hand and smiled down weakly at the defeated Irken, covered in bruises, scratches and burns.

His words resounded in my head and still haunt me to this day.

"Dib..h-help...Please..I-I'll do anything...p-please."

The great almighty Invader Zim was asking ME for help? Me? His "pathetic" rival for life?

I've known Zim since 5th grade. I can tell when he is lying or not. Pretty easy to tell anyway. That look in his eyes...and that way he said those few simple words...he definitely wasn't lying. I offered my hand in front of the weakened alien, who gleamed back.

10. My One and Only Friend
"He is an Irken Invader, from a far away planet called Irk. Assigned to planet Earth on a "secret" mission from his leaders, the Almighty Tallest. As the name suggests, they are simply taller than everyone else, however hold the most power over Irk. The Irkens have a hierarchy based on height. He is one of shortest Irkens alive. He doesn't grow or mature as fast as us humans do. He can be a stubborn, idiotic, pain in the butt some of the time, but I definitely don't regret meeting my one and only friend, Invader Zim."