AN: This is what happens when you try and undo how badly blocked you are - probably, I should apologize.

Also, I suspect you will need to suspend your disbelief for what comes next (also, if you've been harrassing me over PM or DM, thank you - I really do appreciate it!). I tried to temper it down with the nod to Steinbeck - did I fail? Not fail? I don't even know.

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Moments That Settle

Even the best laid tac plans sometimes don't work out the way they'd hoped.

And this is one of those tac plans, an extra person standing just outside the field of the camera, no way they'd ever have caught it, not unless they'd been running surveillance themselves from the night before.

It's not a disaster though, this idiot who can barely shoot straight (Spike assumes that's the only reason he doesn't have a bullet lodged somewhere in his skull), lets off one that grazes his neck, one that lodges in his vest and three or four that get embedded somewhere in the wall behind him. Close range though.

Pain's worse than he remembers it being, thinks he caught it right inside the rib cage, seriously hopes it missed everything important or he's going to be looking at surgery in his future and he'd really rather not-

"Status? Team One?" Right. That's Boss. Everyone answers and he hears, "Spike? Status!"

Kind of hard to breathe right now, the fucking bullet caught him right in his exhale and he can't grab any air yet. Forces himself to relax and then sucks in air gratefully. "Yeah," he wheezes.

It's Ed he hears hollering for the kid to put the gun down, Ed who reaches down for him, Ed who looks absolutely terrified before a mask drops down over his whole face.

"Vest, Ed. Vest," Spike says because he knows that look, like it's Lew all over again.

"Good. That's good, Buddy. Can you stand?"

Ed hauls him to his feet and Spike has to suppress a groan. Okay. So. That hurts. He lets out a breath, lets his breathing even out. Winces.

"You're not supposed to let them hit you," Leah says with an eye roll but he catches her relieved look.

"Yeah, think I missed that day in kindergarten," he says. Makes a face. Hates sitting on the sidelines, knows he's going to be off-duty for at least a week, more if there's something broken or perforated. Talk about a hassle.

At the top of the stairs, Jules reaches for his MP5, grins at him in relief and bumps her shoulder lightly against his arm.

Boss meets him outside, walks him over to EMS and like, he looks all worried so Spike tells him a bad joke about bubble bath that has Boss snorting and rolling his eyes (not Spike's best material, not by a long shot but. Does the trick).

EMS takes a look, asks Spike a bunch of questions that he answers succinctly; no, there's no tenderness other than at the site, no, he's not feeling hot or dizzy, no, he's not nauseous and why, yes, thanks for asking, that does hurt. The paramedic tells him he's probably got a broken rib but Spike's had broken ribs before and while this hurts, now that the adrenaline's wearing off, he can at least appreciate that there's nothing broken and he's not even going to need a trip to the ER.

He leans back in the chair once they're all finally on their way back to HQ. Sam leans over, claps him on the shoulder. "You okay?"

"Totally fine."

Sam nods at him and lets it go and Spike's thinking that they're probably going to postpone the debrief till tomorrow and that he's going to owe them all at least a round and maybe two and he wonders if Winnie will feel like joining them.

He's purposely kept his thoughts away from her, knows how it is when he starts thinking about her on a call so he doesn't do that. He knows she heard, knows she would have heard his status update too but still. He hates being the reason she has to worry.

He pauses at the desk while the rest of Team One heads to the locker room.

"Hey Winnie."

She doesn't smile, just looks up at him with her face all pale and - she just looks like she had a bad scare and hasn't quite gotten over it yet. Her hands are all steady on the keyboard though. "Hey." Her voice is soft, whole mess of things he hears in there.

He takes a deep breath. "You know I'm okay, right?"

"Yeah. I know."

He hears relief, knows she must have been tempering it down so she could finish her shift, get through the rest of the things she needs to get through and he feels a bit faint when he looks at her face, the fact that ever agreed to this at all, that she's waiting around for him at the end of shift, that he gets to go home with her. He probably spends five minutes too long just staring at her and she smiles at him, looks a little less terrified.

"I'm gonna grab a shower," he says, keeps his voice calm because they can't have both of them going ahead and freaking out. And she just – she looks a little freaked out, is all he's saying.

"Okay. You uh. You need to go to the ER?"

He shrugs. "Nah. Got checked over. Nothing serious."

She rolls her eyes at him. "If you say so."

He grins at her, leans on the desk, shifts his weight and then remembers why exactly he wasn't doing that before. Covers it with a really bad line but she laughs and he thinks the slightly agonizing pain afterwards – well, it's worth it.

He also can't decide if the hot water feels good or not, glances in the mirror after he showers and wonders if Winnie'll find it weird if he just keeps his shirt on till his skin goes back to the right colour (figures she definitely will, even though there's a flare of vibrant purple starting on his right side and he'd rather she didn't see it at all).

Ed catches him at the door to the briefing room. "Debrief tomorrow afternoon."

Spike knows how this goes, knows he's going to have to see his own doctor tomorrow, get a note clearing him for active duty and that even then, he'll be stuck in the truck until Ed feels like he can jab him in the side and not have him flinch. "Copy."

"And drinks at The Goose now. You're buying, by the way."

Spike rolls his eyes (he knows how this goes too, guy who gets shot gets the first round and, depending on how bad he scared everyone else, the second and third too. So after Jules came back, she ended up getting them all five rounds and a few orders of wings. That was a fairly sloppy night, actually). "Yeah yeah."

Winnie's waiting outside with everyone else too, slides her hand into his pocket and grins up at him. He's a little relieved, obviously, she's feeling better about the whole thing but he also catches this look Ed sends her, like she's his kid sister or something (which – okay, so he needs to get himself a grip and stop thinking these ridiculous soppy thoughts).

He gets the first round, holds Winnie's hand under the table and doesn't want to let go of her so she has to pick up her glass with her left hand and he doesn't even care. She sits close to him, warmth all down his side and how nice she smells, even after a day at work and he relaxes a little (it's just, okay, so possibly, that bullet scared him a little bit too).

He half thinks Ed's going to make him get a second round too, but his TL just squeezes his shoulder and tells them all to get home safe.

They get in the front door and Winnie helps him off with his coat, even though he's still got both his arms and he can use them just fine, hangs it up for him as he kicks off his shoes and he's about to suggest they just sit down for a bit, watch tv or something, when she leans up and kisses him hard on the mouth.

Usually, kiss like that, he'd have her naked and up against the wall in a second and a half but it's different tonight, how she keeps moving just out of his reach and he's wondering what in the hell it's all about.

"Hang on," he pants against her mouth and she shakes her head, keeps kissing him and he finally has to grasp her by the arms, muscle her between him and the wall, even though his rib is asking him what in the hell he thinks he's doing. "Win. You okay?"

"Just want you," she says, shakes her head at him. "Come on. Please. Let me."

And like really, what in the hell can he say to that? She tugs him into the kitchen, unbuckles his jeans and she kisses him the whole time she's unbuttoning his shirt (and honestly, she is just so good at multitasking, he really doesn't tell her often enough, makes a mental note to rectify that), only then she pushes it off his shoulders and freezes.

He clears his throat, had actually totally forgotten about it (in his defence, he did have other things on his mind). "Uh-"

"That hurting? You want me to stop?" All concern and this little furrow between her eyebrows.

He snorts, gets his hands on her jaw. "S'okay. And no. I really don't."

She lets out a huff but she kisses him again and he figures it's got to be okay because then she tugs off the rest of her clothes and he gets her skin right against his. She's got great skin, all soft, no matter where he touches her and she always smells good. He inhales against her neck, bites at her gently and she moans, presses her hips against his and he has no idea why she dragged him into the kitchen of all places, what she's thinking, but she presses him gently into one of the kitchen chairs.

Her grin falters, just a little when her eyes fix on that bruise but he's really not even thinking about it now because, you know, priorities, Winnie adjusting herself so that she's straddling him. Jesus. She's beautiful all the time but just a little bit more, a little bit different, when it's just the two of them like this.

She kisses him and he touches her, slides one hand down until she whimpers his name, tips her hips against his fingers. Not like he really needs to do a whole lot here, not like she's not ready for him, but he's never been able to resist Winnie panting against his skin, begging him just a little.

She's got her arms looped around his neck, tells him, "I'm going to-"

Like he doesn't already know, all those little warnings he's getting, ignores her entirely and she gets a little louder and he's smiling against her neck when she lets out this satisfied little noise. She pulls away a little, still close to him and raises her eyebrow. "Oh shut up," she mutters but she's grinning.

"I didn't say anything." Eases his wet fingers out from between them.

"Yeah, you didn't have to," she says, rolls her eyes. "You really okay?"

"I'm really okay."

"Okay good. Cause I didn't really want to stop either."

He opens his mouth to tell her that duh, like he doesn't already know that, how wet she was before he even got his fingers on her but then she raises up just a little and then slides down and okay, seriously, she's just so warm and it's like-

"Winnie," he mutters, pulls her closer to him.

She's got her hands in his hair, hips barely moving and she lets out this breathless laugh that always makes him smile. "Love you."

He bites against her neck, feels her shiver. "Love you."

She slips her tongue into his mouth and he kisses her back deeply, pulls her closer and lets out a low groan right into her mouth when she changes that gentle moving forward and back of her hips into something a little more urgent, a little harder. He slides his palms down her sides, rests them on her hips, doesn't try and change her pace, likes to just watch her. She doesn't disappoint, gives him a wicked grin, slides her hand across and down her own body and the air between them is all crackly and hot and she collapses against him, loses her rhythm and he wraps her hair around his hand. Tugs so that he can see her face, kisses her hard on the mouth.

"Stop trying to get killed, okay?"

He smiles at her. "Copy that."

She wrinkles her nose. "Turn off that cop talk for one second, would you?"

He laughs, breath exhaling too quickly when she starts moving again. "Sorry. Habit." Knows she's trying to get him out of the headspace of being on a call (it just – it takes time, some nights. Like when you've had the shit scared out of you).

"I'll give you habit," she mutters, moves faster. "Don't you dare come, I'm not done yet."

"Working on it," he says, gritting his teeth.

She laughs, all breathless and pretty and he tries not to think about how she feels, how she's too warm, too slippery, too much. Gets one hand between them and he knows he's being too rough, knows it from the way she's suddenly louder, the way she starts talking, telling him not to stop and like, Winnie has a filthy mouth when she wants to, probably worse than any of the guys he's ever hung out with before and definitely worse than him (although – like, possibly he doesn't start laughing in the middle of telling her stuff anymore and he knows that's all to do with her) and he has to gets his lips on hers, get her to shut up for a second so he can try and think about something other than the fact that she's close and that despite all of that, he's probably closer than she is.

Her rhythm is all way too fast and she's got her arms around his neck, nestled close, skin on skin all the way down, and like any other time, she'd be a huge tease, hop off and turn around or something but he wants her close to him, wants to see her face and have her lips right next to his and he sucks hard against the side of her throat, bites at her neck, hears her whimper his name.

He's probably never been so relieved in his entire life as he is when she gets louder, bottom lip caught between her teeth, sounds pretty fucking obscene, actually, everything in her clenching and her face tipped back, clinging to his shoulders and she's so fucking pretty, skin all flushed and her mouth all swollen from kissing him. He pulls her closer, tangles his fingers in her hair and she never stops moving,

Everything between them is soaking and hot and he can't, wants it to last forever and also wants more, and it's so many versions of ridiculous that what gets him there is-

"Love you." Gasped breathlessly against his neck and he grips her waist, presses his fingers into her skin, groans her name, is trying to tell her that he loves her too, loves her more than he ever meant to love anyone but the words are lost somewhere in between his tongue and the roof of his mouth and it takes him a while to stop his body from tensing, to remember that he's bruised and that it hurts and that he also doesn't care.

Her hair is all stuck to her skin, all sweaty and his tongue darts out, licks a line along her neck, tastes salt and she hugs him tightly.

He tangles a hand in her hair, tugs a little so that she tips her face up and he can kiss her. "Love you, Winnie. A lot."

She kisses him back, and then clears her throat. "Did I hurt you?"

He lets out a disbelieving snort. "I'm not that fragile."

She sighs, rolls her eyes at him. "I know that. I meant. You know. Did I make it worse?"

"Definitely," he says, can't keep the grin off his face.

"Oh, for god's sake," she mutters, like she's trying to look annoyed and is failing miserably.

"I'm okay."

Her hands are warm on either side of his face. "I know." She sounds fucking relieved as all shit.

He leans his face towards hers, angles his head so he can kiss her again.