Summary: Sometimes it was better to end things now than to hang on until they inevitably fell apart.

Author's Note: Because you all asked for more :)

Disclaimer: Not so much.

Chapter 2

"Why, Kate?"

"Why what?" she asked, confused by the sudden turn of conversation, of Castle's tone of voice. Gone was the despair, replaced by determination.

"Why did you leave?"

Kate sighed heavily, forced herself to answer honestly. "Because I got scared."

"But of what?" he pressed, unwilling to relent until he got to the bottom of this, until he understood her reasoning.

"Forever," she answered meekly.

"You don't think this will last?" Castle asked, gesturing between them sharply.

"I...no, not..."

He interrupted her disjointed mutterings, desperate to make sense of this. "Is it me?" he asked bluntly. "Is it because I've made the promise of forever twice before and it didn't work out?"

Never had he regretted his past more than at this moment.

"No," she replied immediately, needing him to understand that this was not his fault. It had nothing to do with his divorces or his past. They had talked over all of that and she understood, knew that this was different. That they were different.

No, this one was on her.

"Then what?"

"It's...me," Kate managed, cursing her lack of eloquence. She had never been able to string together words like he did and at times like this she felt so woefully inadequate, so unable to properly express her thought processes.

"You're afraid your feelings won't last?"

"No, God, Castle. No," she corrected, horrified, unwilling to allow that thought to spread any further. She would be hurt that he could even consider it were it not for her less-than convincing actions yesterday. "God, I...I love you. So much. And that's never not going to be the case."

"Then what, Kate? Because I'm not...I'm not following you right now."

She sighed again, rose from her squatted position to perch on the edge of the bed. Her hands came to rest in her lap, one stacked on top of the other, and Castle's eyes automatically flicked down to her left hand. He felt a pang of longing at seeing the ring on her finger, right where it belonged, and yet it pained him to see it there under these circumstances.

"I have a dangerous job, Castle. And you're there with me. One of us not coming home one night is a very real possibility. And I..." she trailed off, paused for a breath before continuing. "I've been there. I wouldn't survive it again. And I would never want to put you through something like that either."

"Kate..."

"I know," she continued, but Castle spoke again before she had a chance to say more because he desperately needed her to understand that her fears were not confined to her alone. That they were very much mutual.

"What if I walked outside tomorrow and got hit by a car? Or by a falling object?"

She snapped her eyes up to meet his in the semi-darkness, mouth open in shock and terror. "Castle..."

"I'm not saying it's going to happen," he clarified. "I'm just saying that it could. I could wind up in the wrong place at the wrong time and not come home tomorrow."

Kate bit back a sob, felt a tear escape from the corner of her eye and trickle down her cheek. She was already emotionally unstable and adding hypothetical worst-case scenarios to her thoughts was not helping her situation.

"And what happens then?"

She closed her mouth, took a breath to respond but stopped again, because how could she ever condense such a horrible possibility into words?

"I would...be devastated," she offered finally.

Castle nodded in agreement. "And would that be any different if we were married?"

"I...no," Kate conceded.

"Exactly." He affirmed. If something happened to you tomorrow, I would be broken, Kate. I would be so broken that I wouldn't know what to do. And nothing is going to change that. Not a ring, not a wedding. Nothing."

"I know," she whispered, because she already felt that way at the mere consideration of a life without him. And that was what justified her decision, at least in the heat of the moment. That was what she needed him to understand.

"That's why...why I left," she admitted sadly.

Castle shifted in bed, loosened his grip on the pillow and freed an arm to prop himself up on one elbow. His eyes locked with hers as understanding dawned and he wanted to be absolutely sure that his next words were correctly received. Because he did not agree with her thought process, but he understood it.

"Before anything could happen."

Kate nodded, ashamed at her choice, her spur of the moment, panicked reaction.

"I wish I could promise you that nothing ever will," he began quietly, gaze still unwavering. "But we both know that would be a lie." He reached out, covered her hand with one of his on the edge of the bed, and the contact after more than a day in his absence was overwhelming. "But I can promise you this; if something ever does, it will be so much better to have happy memories to look back on rather than the regret from missing out on the chance to create a life together."

She hung her head. "I know."

"Do you?" he queried. His anger was diminishing, he was willing to forgive her. But he needed to be absolutely sure that she understood the risks and was prepared to take the leap.

Kate dropped his gaze, allowed her eyes to float down to their hands, his over hers, parts of the engagement band peeking through the gaps between his fingers. She twisted her hand beneath his, twined their fingers together for emphasis.

"Yes. I do."

He nodded slowly, the movement measured. "Okay."

After a tense pause, Castle tugged lightly on her hand, just enough force to urge her down onto the bed, closer to him. She loosened her hand from his grip, lifted it to cup his cheek as she settled next to him, mirroring his position with one elbow beneath her. She leaned her forehead against his, eyes fluttering closed with the nearness.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered, desperation and apology and guilt and pain and 'I love you' all wrapped up in three words, a barely audible plea for forgiveness. "So sorry, Castle."

His free arm slithered around her waist and he tilted his head to the side so that his temple came to rest against hers, breaths fanning out over the exposed skin of each other's necks. He paused for a moment, took the time to breathe her in, her familiar scent comforting yet also a reminder of what he very nearly lost.

Castle would be lying if he said he was not the slightest bit weary or distrusting, that he was not nervous as to their future, to her next moment of panic. Because the repercussions were real and he knew they would rear their ugly head again at some point. But they had to begin rebuilding somewhere and here, together, with an apology fresh on Kate's lips, was as good a place to start as any.

"I've missed you," he released on an exhale, lips feather light against her cheek.

"I've missed you too," Kate replied, felt the first wave of tension leave her body.

"And I love you," Castle continued, fingers digging into her spine with just enough pressure to coax her closer, and she came without resistance, body pliable under his welcoming touch.

"And I forgive you," he spoke at last, and Kate felt the oxygen leave her in a rush, an enormous sense of relief washing over her.

"Thank you," she breathed after a moment, the words nearly stuck in her throat as she fought to regain her composure, felt her world begin to right itself once again.

She lifted her head just slightly, but it was enough to lean in for a kiss. It was shy and tentative, treading lightly after...well, everything. Castle was cautious as well, not deepening the kiss, merely brushing their lips together in some kind of silent 'oh thank God.'

They separated soon after, dark eyes locking as their gazes held, heaps of words and emotions passing between them. It was a jumbled mess, so many things still to talk over, to work through, to forgive.

They were not okay, not completely and not yet. But they would be.

Of that Kate was certain.

Because she may have been stupid enough to walk away from him yesterday, but no matter what the future threw their way, she was never making that mistake again.

She was here to stay.

As if reading her mind, Castle lifted a hand to cover hers where it still rested on his jaw, gently guided it down to rest between them on the sheets. His thumb absently stroked over the metal band, tracing the shapes of the various stones, all modest yet classy and beautiful, perfect for her, for them.

"I'm sorry," Kate whispered again, hating herself for having said 'no,' for ruining the only proposal she ever dreamed of. For the fact that she had actually turned him down. God, what was she thinking?

"It's okay," he placated, but it was empty, false, and they both knew it. The pain of her rejection would sting worse than anything else that had happened and would linger for a long time.

"It's not," she murmured into the darkness, settling her head against the arm that was supporting her. She was taking a chance here but she had an inkling that maybe her suggestion would be exactly what they needed right now. "But...ask me again."

Castle's eyes flitted from hers to the ring and back again, surprised and yet hopeful. Kate nodded in encouragement, a soft smile adorning her face as she awaited his words.

Romantic and dramatic and well-planned was out of the question this time, leaving short and sweet and simple as the best option. And after all they had been through in the last day, that was probably for the better.

Castle took a deep breath, released it slowly as his eyes searched hers in the darkness. Kate had no idea exactly what he was looking for, but she could tell when he found it because he flicked his eyes down to the ring once more and when they lifted back to hers, they were clear and calm.

"Marry me, Kate," he whispered.

She squeezed his hand, leaned in to seal her answer with a kiss.

"Yes."

THE END

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