A/N. I'm trying to make myself get over the 'losing Leverage' blues and this popped into my head. I don't think I could write a story as moving as Nate's from 'The Toy Job' so here's a bit of fun instead. I will warn you, I wrote the first half of this at daft-o'clock in the morning (that's about an hour before stupid-o'clock, if you're wondering) so it might be a little ropey in places.

Post-Ep 'The Toy Job' I'm taking liberties with my own personal fanon here (I see E/H/P as being together for quite a while by this point, but this fic will be pre-relations.)

The group were sitting around the bar still. Sophie had just finished telling them a story about her fondest Christmas memory. Apparently she had an aunt in a place called Brecon and one Christmas they'd spent the holiday with her. It had snowed, and Sophie had curled up by an open fire on Christmas eve with her favourite stuffed bear, while the adults all talked above her head. The story had been sweet, and Sophie and Nate were still holding hands on the bar when Parker took a deep breath to tell her story. Nobody was expecting what came out.

"Hardison and I had sex for the first time." Everyone quickly vocalised their need to not be having this conversation but Parker continued, "it was weird."

"Parker!" Hardison spoke up. "This is not what Sophie meant by sharing."

"But I thought you wanted to tell him."

"Him," Hardison stressed. "Parker, him, not them."

"Oh."

"Parker," Sophie spoke tentatively, as Nate made an aborted attempt to stop her. "Is there-"

"Never mind!" Parker cut in with false cheer. "I'll think of something else. Eliot, your turn."

Eliot gave Parker a look that said she was crazy before looking around at his family. Taking a breath, he spoke. "Eliot's not really my name. It's Leonard. When my little sister was learning to talk, she called me 'Liet.' She used to make this little 'tat-tat' sound because she was trying to pronounce the 'D' but didn't have the teeth for it." Eliot smiled fondly at the memory before shaking it off and continuing. "Anyway, when I went into the less savoury lines of work, I started using Eliot. Wanted to keep myself a little distant from it all, I guess."

There was a moment of silence before Hardison leaned forward, placing a hand on Eliot's arm. "Well, I for one am glad you're Eliot Spencer." Eliot smiled a little, but it dropped when he added. "Because Leonard is a horrible name."

"Hey, man!" Eliot growled, trying to pull his arm away but with humour still in his voice. "Leonard was my grand-daddy's name."

"And there's a reason he didn't pass it along to your father."

Nate interrupted Eliot's snarl by stepping out from behind the bar. "We're gonna head out," he said. "Try not to kill each other?"

"But Hardison and I haven't told our stories yet," Parker said with a frown.

"It'll still be Christmas in the morning," Sophie smiled. "Take some more time to think about it."

They were halfway out of the bar area when Nate turned back around. "Your name is Eliot now, right? Legally?"

Eliot nodded. "I changed it. One of the few legal things I've done in the last twelve years."

"Good," Nate nodded. "It suits you." Eliot didn't seem to know how to answer that, but Nate continued talking. "It could've been worse, y'know."

"Yeah?"

"You could've been called Sue." Nate took Sophie's hand and hurried out, but she looked back in time to see Eliot making a less than friendly gesture towards Nate.

When they were gone, Eliot stood up to leave. Hardison and Parker shared a panicked look before each standing up to stop Eliot from going.

"We need to tell you something," Parker spoke in a hurry.

Eliot sighed. "Look, Parker, I really don't want to know about-"

"I said your name during sex!" Parker interrupted him. Eliot stood shocked for a moment, before looking from Parker to Hardison. He didn't know how he was meant to react, and he certainly wasn't prepared for what Parker said next. "So did Hardison."

"We know this is weird," Hardison started, but Parker interrupted.

"No, he thinks it's weird," she clarified. "I think it makes a lot of sense. We work better as a threesome."

Hardison put out a placating hand as Eliot remained silent. "Look, I tried to explain to her why it might be a strange idea for you. I mean, it's not something we've talked about. We don't even know if you swing that way."

"Do you?" Eliot asked. Hardison gulped at the intensity of the look Eliot was giving him. Slowly, he nodded. "And you're attracted to me?" Another nod. Eliot looked to Parker. "And you?" Parker squared her shoulders and gave a short nod. "Well alright then," Eliot said with a smirk. He put a hand out each to the two, and each took the offering. Together they headed out, with Parker belatedly adding.

"You know this means no more soccer moms for you, right?"