The Runaway Shawn

Disclaimer: I do not own Psych or Doctor Who, no matter how much I wish I did.

Note: I do skip some parts of the episodes. This is because what would happen here is pretty much what happened in the episode.

December 25th 2006

It was a normal day for Shawn. Absolutely, completely, totally, 100% normal. And that was boring. That was dull. That was boring. That was unacceptable. Simply unacceptable. It got to the point at which Shawn finally decided… screw it. I'll take the damn case. Shawn had a case offered to him by the SBPD. But it was stupid. It was simple. It was… boring. But fine. If it would mean that he would have something to do on this of all days, then fine.

H.C. Clements. Breaking and entry cases. Boring.

Shawn was on his way to the Psych office when he noticed his bike was running out of gas. Typical for Shawn, really. He never did pay attention to how much gas he had. And now, he'd have to walk his bike all the way to the nearest gas station.

He walked towards the stand to pay for his gas when all of a sudden… he disappeared. The next thing he knew, he was in a room. A very strange room. There were buttons. Lots of them. Not a very good room for someone like Shawn. He walked towards the biggest one, hand at the ready, when all of a sudden a man who was just as well groomed appeared.

"What?" was all he said. Shawn stared at him, raising one eyebrow.

"Yes?" Shawn replied.

"What are you doing here?" the man asked.

"What am I doing here? I would like to know too."

"What?"

"You kidnapped me. Are you holding me hostage? Well, let me just let you down softly now. My dad has no money. I mean, you could try reaching Gus, but I'm not sure how much money he has at this moment. Or how willing he is to part with it. If I were you, I'd choose someone who looks a little bit more wealthy than me. I mean, hell, I'm travelling halfway across the country on a motorbike. Wouldn't most wealthy people take a plane? Or a helicopter? I'm not really sure-"

"What? I didn't kidnap you."

"Well, see, last I checked I was getting gas and ZIP here I am." Shawn then noticed the door. "So if you don't mind I'm just going to ZIP back out, pay for my gas." Shawn started heading for the door and suddenly, the man started to remember where he was and what was going on.

"Wait! No! don't go!" he said, running after Shawn.

"See? You take me up here, lock me up, don't let me leave… you sure you didn't kidnap me? It's all sounding very sketchy. Just saying." And then Shawn opened the door. He nearly took a step out too until he noticed the impossible.

Earth. He was staring down at Earth. The moon was just visible… from up close. Shawn stared at the infinite space around him. Stars within reach, planets he'd never even known about in sight. All he could do was stare at the impossibilities before him with wide eyes and an open mouth.

"Who are you?" he asked at last, all jokes left behind.

"I'm the Doctor. And you are?"

"Shawn. Shawn Spencer. Where are we?"

"Space."

"Really? I wouldn't have guessed!" Shawn found himself yelling. "Where the hell are we?! How the hell can I be looking down at Earth?! I'm dead, aren't I? oh, God, I'm dead! I've died! Dammit! Well, might as well, really. Today was going to be boring as hell anyways. My death certainly spiced it up a bit. I can't believe I'm dead-"

"You're not dead!" the Doctor yelled at last.

"Then explain this!" Shawn said, gesturing around himself. "This is impossible. And I know impossible."

"You're in space. This is my… spaceship…"

"So you abducted me?"

"Hey, I didn't-"

"Oh, Gus would've loved to see this! And you! Are you some kind of Martian than?"

"No… no, no. I'm not… I'm not from-"

"Wait… no… this isn't right. I have to get back. I have to get back down to Earth. Look, this has been great and all, but I've got friends and a job. I literally just got assigned a case. Could you… take me back now?"

"Okay. But for the record, I did not abduct you" the Doctor said, starting to push several buttons. Soon enough, the space ship started to tumble, spinning uncontrollably.

"Couldn't you steer this thing a bit more… delicately?" Shawn asked.

"I could… if I had the correct amount of people flying this thing…"

"Great…" Shawn muttered. But soon, the impossible journey back to Earth was finished. Shawn opened the front door, happy to be at the gas station he was just at. he let out a sigh of relief before turning back to the Doctor. "Well, thanks for the lift. I'll leave you and your lady friend to get back to business. Funny… didn't think Martians were so like us in that way…"

"What lady friend?" the Doctor asked. Shawn turned back to the Doctor and gestured towards a purple shirt hanging on the railing. The Doctor looked as if he was about to cry when he saw that and immediately Shawn regretted ever bringing up the stupid thing. "That belonged to a friend. But she's gone now. She's lost."

"I'm so sorry" Shawn said sincerely. "Let me offer you a drink. I mean, it is Christmas after all" Shawn started pulling on the Doctor's arm, dragging him along with him into the gas station.

The two of them were just sipping on really hot coffee when the Doctor noticed it. A security camera. Monitoring the gas station at all times. Now he could see how the hell this boy wound up in his TARDIS. It shouldn't be possible. It just shouldn't. So in the middle of Shawn's sentence, the Doctor stood up and walked to the camera. Investigating.

"Doctor, are you even… Doctor? Doc!" Shawn called out when he noticed his new friend had left him hanging. Shawn turned back to his bike to find a car in its place. Without any choice at all, the young man was forced into the car. "DOCTOR! HELP!" Shawn called out.

The Doctor ran to his TARDIS and followed the car until they reached a highway. The Doctor forced his TARDIS to fly barely above the road, right next to the car. He pushed open the door and held out a hand to the strange young man in the car.

"You're going to have to jump!" The Doctor ordered.

"Okay!" Shawn replied as he swung open his door. He didn't even think twice before taking the leap. He just went for it, head first. It even caught the Doctor off guard and they both fell over inside the TARDIS. "I never noticed, and I'm not sure if you have either " Shawn started. "But it could be rather important, so I'm going to tell you anyways. Did you know that your spaceship is bigger on the inside?"

To Shawn's request, they found themselves at the Psych office. With the motorbike and a pineapple smoothie from the vendor just outside. In the Psych office, the Doctor explained everything about Shawn. How he got 'abducted' and what was wrong with him. It was Huon Particles. Very old particles. From the beginning of time. There would be no way to stop the robot santas from finding him. They could easily trace him. The question was, of course, how did Shawn come to be in contact with these Huon Particles?

In return, Shawn explained everything about his current case. He explained that there were breaking and entry cases going on in this firm and it was his job to investigate it. He made sure to emphasise how boring he found it. The Doctor, on the other hand, was very intrigued. And so, he did what any other curious person would do. He looked them up. And sure enough, it was owned by none other than Torchwood.

After an intense battle with Christmas tree decorations, the Doctor and Shawn found themselves at HC Clements. Investigating. Together they went down to the lower basement, where the Doctor feared something horrible was happening. There, they found a lab. Liquid Huon Particles were being made. That was what made Shawn attracted to the TARDIS.

"Think very carefully" The Doctor told Shawn. "They would have had to be giving you these Huon Particles for months now. What have you had everyday that's different these last few months? Think very carefully, Shawn."

"The Pineapple smoothies" Shawn whispered. "That place only opened up a few months ago. I seem to be they're best customer. They gave me a card and everything." The Doctor gave him a look. "I will not apologise for my love of delicious flavour."

"Well, that love for delicious flavour is going to get you killed" the Doctor said.

"Then may it be a tasty death." The Doctor patted Shawn's back.

"Okay, Shawn. Sure. A tasty death."

"Yessssss" a voice said. "A very tasty deatthhh." A wall to their side opened up revealing a giant hole that never seemed to end. "Only not for you, but for my children!" this was shortly followed by an evil laugh that made both men feel a bit uneasy. Shawn shot the Doctor a very worried look.

"Show yourself!" the Doctor demanded.

"Dude! Seriously? It just threatened to feed me to its children, and you're asking it to show itself?!" Shawn complained.

"Only mad-men talk to thin air and you don't want to make me a mad man!"

"Then I shall present myself!" another evil laugh. Shawn rolled his eyes, already getting bored of the same old, same old. That is, until the giant, red half-human-half-spider-creature-alien-thing presented itself. Shawn backed away from it. Slightly in awe and slightly in horror.

"Racnoss" the Doctor muttered.

"Gus would have loved to see this! Another alien!" Shawn squealed excitedly, like a school girl. The Doctor raised an eyebrow at this boy. He hoped one day to meet Gus. But that was for another time.

"Tell me what you need the Huon Particles for!" The Doctor demanded. Another evil laugh from the weird-spider-thing-apparently-called-a-Racnoss.

"Seriously?! Stop with the laughing, it gets old!" Shawn yelled.

"Fiesssty little boy!"

"The pineapple smoothies. Those were poisoning me, but how did you know I'd end up here? How did you know months in advance that I'd be assigned the HC Clements case? How did you know I'd end up here?" Shawn asked. The Doctor nodded in approval. All of those were legit questions.

"An easy cassse and an alien" the Racnoss said simply. "How could you resist?"

"Why him?" the Doctor asked.

"Why not?" evil laugh. Shawn rolled his eyes again. "Now… say goodbye, Doctor…"

Suddenly, Shawn and the Doctor found themselves surrounded by hundreds of little robots. All under the command of the Racnoss.

"You wouldn't dare" Shawn said. "You need me alive!"

"I wouldn't worry, psychic!" The Racnoss said. "They have a very good ssssshhhot!"

It was all over. The Racnoss was dead. Each and every one of them. Not a single one was left alive. And that left Shawn feeling… just awful. Genocide. How could it be? And now, to Shawn's request, he was being dropped off at his father's house for a Christmas dinner. What else?

"So what now?" the Doctor asked him.

"Well…" Shawn said. "I have to take off the 'Every Case Solved' sign now. Seeing as I can't exactly go spreading around that the breaking and entry cases were due to a spider-alien trying to use me to feed and save her children."

"Sorry about that" the Doctor said, even though he really didn't need to.

"No big deal. So I don't let people know about this case. It's just one case. No big deal."

"What about travelling? Ever… I don't know… ever think about seeing the worlds?"

"Well, I don't know. I've done my fair of travelling… wait… worlds? Plural?"

"You bet. So what do you say? Travel with me?"

"No" Shawn said immediately. The Doctor looked taken back. "Today… is it always like this with you?"

"Adventure? Yeah. I thought you enjoyed your fair share of adventure as well."

"Yes. That's why I became a detective. For adventure. Not for genocide. Do me a favour though. Don't go travelling alone. I know what that could do to a man. It's not good. Especially not for you."

"I don't need anyone."

"Yes you do. You need someone to stop you. Just like I did today. "

"I'll bear that in mind." The Doctor said with a nod.

"Good." Shawn replied. "So… I guess this is goodbye."

"I guess so."

"Will I ever see you again?" Shawn asked, immediately feeling overly clingy and even a bit girl asking that question.

"Oh, I hope I do, Shawn Spencer. I hope I do."

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