"Hey, Karks… I know you're falling asleep. Just do it before I push you off of me."

You watched as he muttered something about not really being tired, even though you knew better. He had his head in your lap and was purring non-stop as you pet his head. His eyes were slipping shut, then snapping open. His hand half-heartedly pushing at you hand, mumbling for you to stop, even though he knew you wouldn't. He groaned and his eyes slipped shut again.

"You're a real bulge-faced asshole, Strider…" he muttered, half-asleep.

You frowned and pushed your shades up, "Not true, Shouty McShoutShout."

"It's so…. Unbelievably true… It would be a lie… To… Say otherwise…"

After you were sure he had passed out, you smiled, thankful no one was around. You kissed your sleeping crabby boyfriend's lips, your fingers still running through his unruly, tangled hair. When was the last fucking time he brushed his hair? Oh god, did you have to do everything for him?

After a moment, you laugh at yourself.

When did you start acting like this when he was around? Seriously?

Your hands had stopped petting him a while ago in your thought process. This was brought to your attention when he nuzzled against you, making soft grumbling noises. It was pretty fucking adorable.

You felt your insides get all fuzzy as you started to pet him again, his face lost of all tension as he started to purr again. Your face had a smile ripped across it again, it almost hurt, but it was a small price to pay for the idea that came across your mind.

"I'm a bulge-faced asshole? Are you sure about that? We'll see about that…"

"What's so fucking goddamned funny?" he hissed through his teeth as Rose and Kanaya shared a little smile and looked away.

You just shrugged, looking at your lovely handiwork scribbled across his face. You took a drink of the drink you had, admiring the penises and tentabulges scrawled along his chin and mouth. On his forehead said 'I FUCKING LOVE DAVE'S MONSTER COCK' and you drew shades like your's around his eyes. Where you found those red and black sharpies you'll never know, but you were fucking damned glad you did. It was a beautiful work of art.

That was until Terezi came in and nearly burst into sobbing laughter. She had to turn around and hold herself up on her cane as she could smell the artwork.

That's when you almost lost it and had to leave, sprinting away from Karkat, who looked into a reflective surface.

"STRIDER!"