Author's Note: -coughs- So I feel awful for not updating any stories for so long, hence posting this story. I've got a few chapters already made, so I have a good head start on this story. I hope you guys enjoy, and Merry soon-to-be Christmas!

Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin.

Warning: This has maleXmale relations, and hints at sex. You've been warned!

Chapter 1

The warm pulse was enticing, intoxicating and powerful with a hint of vulnerability mixed in. Merlin could feel the gentle tug of magic on his senses and the quickening of his heartbeat. He could feel the breath catch in the back of his throat and his mouth dried instantly as listless thoughts ran rampant in his mind. Touching, kissing, tasting; the flashes of conjured images did nothing to calm Merlin's growing arousal and panic.

His eyes followed the two knights sparring on the training field like a hawk stalking his prey. At first, he deluded himself into thinking that his gaze was only following the two to protect the young King Arthur. But more and more time passed and his gaze began to stray to the young knight the King was sparring with instead; Mordred, the young Druid boy that he once saved and has tried to kill more than once in the name of Arthur's safety. To say the emotions between the two of them were complicated would be a massive understatement. Yet, stubbornly, his hormones and magic (though, the two were mostly one and the same in nature) had brought a plague of fantasized images to the front of his mind. Merlin's own magic squirmed and boiled inside of him, reacting to the young knight's presence as he gracefully parried every move the King made.

Not that Merlin found this reaction unusual. He had known for awhile now that his magic and his emotions tended to go hand in hand. His attraction to those with magic was much more intense then towards anyone else. It was much like how Merlin felt around magical objects except much more intense and sexual. And on more than one occasion this magical pull has led to attractions to men and women, young and old, noble and peasants alike. Not that he acted out every desire he felt, and most could be ignored. It's just Merlin's luck though that the desires that he couldn't completely ignore were to his two worst enemies. His first infatuation was to the Lady Morgana, long before she strayed from them and betrayed everyone that loved her. Of course, her beauty had a hand in it, but her accursed magic made it a thousand times harder to ignore. Merlin's magic would hum with pure delight around Morgana and it took every ounce of his willpower to keep his hands to himself back then. Only his desire to keep his head firmly on his shoulders kept him away from the raven haired beauty. Merlin had loved once with Freya, so he knew what true affection was like, but the love between him and Freya was not as intense as it was between him and Morgana. The lines between hate and love blurred when him and Morgana were involved though Merlin would bet his life that Kilgarrah would argue relentlessly against that assessment.

Rubbing the weariness from his face, he looked down at his work and smiled slightly. Arthur's sword was sparkling clean. Not a hint of rust could be seen on the gleaming metal blade, and Merlin couldn't help but feel a stab of pride at the blade he helped make. Excalibur was truly a beautiful piece of art, and he wished he could thank Gwen more profusely for allowing him to use her father's treasured blade. Though, to thank her she would have to be informed that Excalibur was indeed her blade and then admit to how it ended up in Arthur's possession. That wasn't a particular conversation that Merlin wanted to have with current Queen of Camelot. His eyes flickered back to the duel in front of him only to find Arthur and Mordred going their separate ways. Apparently, the King had won again, but that wasn't surprising. Arthur wasn't called the best swordsman in Camelot just because. No, what surprised the young warlock was that Mordred had turned to look at him; his normally cold and distant eyes were sparkling with mirth. "Emrys."

Merlin's eyes widened with surprise as Mordred's lazy smirk grew just a touch wider at Merlin's response. The voice in Merlin's head held a ting of amusement and from the look on Mordred's face; Merlin could guess what Mordred was amused about. "Like what you see, Emrys?"

Merlin's tight smile shifted to a scowl. He wasn't partial to being the butt of Mordred's joke even if what Mordred said held some warrant and that they were only talking in each other's minds. "You know exactly why I'm watching, Mordred."

Merlin's tone was clipped and cold, the perfect combination to keep the distance between the two of them. Mordred's eyes narrowed venomously at Merlin. "No, I don't actually. What have I done to earn your mistrust? Was it when I stabbed Morgana in the back? Or did I lose your trust when I jumped in front of that spear and saved the King's life?"

Merlin was startled by the bitterness in Mordred's tone. He was clearly more affected by Merlin's distrust then he let on. For a moment, Merlin pondered again if it was a good idea to push the young Druid boy away. He had made the same mistake with Morgana before, and he would hate for a repeat experience. "It's not what you did; it's what you'll do."

The druid's gaze softened, but they still were narrowed on Merlin. "You've said that before, Emrys, many years ago but still nothing has come of your prediction. Everyone still has their choices to make in life, and I chose to be loyal to Arthur and turned my back on Morgana. In time, I hope you'll see that."

Merlin frowned, lowering his gaze to the sword in his lap before returning his gaze to the piercing icy blue eyes that Merlin admired so much. Sometime during Mordred's speech, he had made his way over to where the warlock was sitting and was now standing a few inches away looking down at Merlin. Shifting uncomfortably under Mordred's gaze, Merlin could understand on some base level what Mordred was trying to say, but the overwhelming fear for Arthur's life seemed to override every ounce of logic he had. "I wish I could believe you… I truly do."

Mordred must have heard the honesty in Merlin's voice because his gaze softens completely and the hint of a smile plays on his lips. "Perhaps, Emrys, we can start as friends?" The spoken question hangs in the air as Mordred stretches his hand out and offers it to Merlin.

Merlin's eyes flicker from Mordred's outstretched hand to his soft, blue-eyed gaze then back to his outstretched hand. Merlin knew what he was truly offering; peace. He'd be a fool to accept it and pretend the vision that he had seen was non-existent. In the back of his mind, though, Merlin could feel the beginnings of guilt starting to claw at his subconscious. He had failed Morgana by not giving her every option available. There was so many things that Merlin could have done differently that could have saved Morgana's life. Maybe destiny didn't have to be set in stone. With that in mind, the weight that had been suffocating Merlin for so long seemed to lift as he set Arthur's sword to the side and accepted Mordred's hand allowing the young knight to pull him to his feet, "Friends then."

Mordred's small smile split into a full-on grin at Merlin's statement. "Thank you, Emrys. I swear I'll prove to you that your trust is not misplaced."

His heart fluttered slightly, his cheeks flushing at Mordred's promise. Merlin wished fervently that this would work out and for once he hadn't made a mistake. He opened his mouth to reply, but jumped with surprise at Arthur's booming voice calling out, "MER-lin!"

The two men shared an amused look and chuckled slightly. Mordred's head tilts slightly as he gives Merlin a knowing look. "Go on then, Emrys. Destiny is calling."

Merlin snorts, "Destiny? I think you've mistaken that prat for someone important."

Mordred chuckled again at Merlin's attitude. Both knew that Merlin's insults were just thinly veiled fondness. In truth, Merlin was proud to call the young King his friend though neither liked to admit their friendship aloud. "MERLIN!"

Merlin huffed, rolling his eyes in annoyance at Arthur's shouting. He grumbles under his breath, "I'm coming you prat…" He flashes Mordred an amused smile, "The man has no patience."

Mordred chuckles at Merlin's usual insults, and on that note, Merlin quickly takes his leave from the training ground with Arthur's cleaned sword in hand.

/BREAK/BREAK/BREAK/

Arthur looks up from his paperwork when he hears his door slam open without a knock. He knew of only one person brave enough to enter his room without knocking and sighed in half annoyance, half fondness, "Where have you been idiot?"

Arthur wasn't surprised to see Merlin flash him an annoyed glare which clearly showed his dislike of the question. "Where do you think I've been? I've cleaned your damn sword and mucked the stables like you asked!"

Merlin's clipped tone surprised the young King. Arthur had known the manservant for nearly a decade and it was rare for Merlin to ever be truly annoyed or frustrated. Though, Arthur had seen a change in the young man the last few years that has had a profound effect on the manservant's personality. When they were younger, Merlin was always quick to flash a smile and brighten anyone's day. He use to have such a never-ending well of happiness that he couldn't help but infect everyone around him with his persistent cheer. Now, his usually cheerful servant had lost his perpetual happiness. His eyes that used to sparkle with mischief and mirth now seemed to be drowning in a never-ending sorrow. It was rare now-a-days for Arthur to even be able to wrangle up an honest smile on the young man's face. Arthur chewed nervously on his lower lip, unsure of how to proceed with his uncharacteristically somber manservant. "Merlin…"

The annoyed look on Merlin's face faded to a frown as he noted the King's examining gaze. Arthur saw Merlin shift uncomfortably where he stood and wrung his hands in front of him as he waited for the King to continue. "What's wrong with you, Merlin? You haven't been yourself of late and I want to know why."

Merlin's eyes shot up from the ground and locked with Arthur's gaze in surprise. Arthur was wearing his princely 'you better talk or else' gaze that always worked on Merlin before. Merlin's eyes darkened then hardened in anger and frustration. Arthur didn't quite know what to make of Merlin's sudden change in mood, and was even more dumbfounded by the anger in Merlin's gaze. Merlin never got angry and especially not with the young King. It was an unnatural look on the manservant that made Arthur want to squirm on the spot. Apparently, Merlin noticed the King's reaction and quickly shook off his anger and shrugged nonchalantly, "It's nothing, sire. I'm fine."

Arthur scowled at his stubborn manservant. He hated when Merlin called him sire and Arthur also hated the words I'm fine. The combination of the two sent a surge of frustration through Arthur and it cost Arthur every ounce of his will to keep from strangling the younger man. "Mer-lin."

The exasperation in Arthur's tone was hard to miss, and quickly Merlin stopped tidying up the room and glanced over to King. Merlin opened his mouth, clearly about to say something biting, but stopped when he caught Arthur's determined gaze then sighed, "It's nothing, Arthur. I just have a lot on my mind."

Usually, Arthur would have snorted and responded with a retort about that being an accomplishment for an idiot like Merlin, but Arthur held his tongue. For once, Merlin did seem to have a lot on his mind and Arthur didn't want his manservant- his friend closing off on him again. Arthur shifted his weight slightly, eyeing Merlin cautiously before carefully asking, "Anything you want to talk about?"

Arthur couldn't help but grin with pleasure as his question prompted a large grin to spread across his friend's face. It was a true smile, not one of the tentative smiles that Merlin usually forced now-a-days, "Nah, its fine." Merlin turned to return to his tidying but stopped and glanced back at Arthur with a warm smile, "Thank you, Arthur. You don't know how much I appreciate that you asked."

Arthur's cheeks flushed at the unexpected compliment. His heart warmed from the pride he could hear in his friend's voice as he thanked Arthur. It was moments like this that made Arthur truly appreciate his manservant's friendship. Arthur coughed, covering for his sudden blush, and quickly recovered enough to remember what he wanted to talk to Merlin about. "So, did you enjoy the show?"

Despite the teasing tone and the condescension, Arthur was still surprised by Merlin's sudden reaction. Merlin stiffened and he nearly jumped out of his skin as he dropped the armor in his arms. Arthur normally would have been amused by the wide-eye, doe-eyed look, but for once Arthur was just confused. Merlin eyed Arthur suspiciously before tentatively asking, "What do you mean, sire?"

Arthur sighed, shaking his head slightly. Great, back to the sire thing again. "I meant that you seemed quite interested in my bout with the young Mordred. I was wondering what you thoughts were on it?"

Merlin raised an eyebrow at Arthur's question, "Truly?"

Arthur couldn't help himself; he rolled his eyes at Merlin's ridiculous question, "Of course. I asked, didn't I?"

The room filled with silence as Merlin quietly inspected his master and friend. The suspicion slowly faded from Merlin's eyes and he finally shrugged and simply stated, "Sir Mordred is improving."

Again, Arthur had the overwhelming urge to roll his eyes at the very basic statement. Though, what Merlin said did have some truth. Mordred had improved a lot since he first became a knight. Now the young knight could even hold his own with Arthur, who was one of the best swordsmen in Camelot. "Indeed he has. He'll make a fine knight after all."

Merlin's mask had again settled over his features as he closes himself off from Arthur. It left Arthur with the sudden urge to punch a wall, because he just couldn't quite understand why the young new knight seemed to have such an effect on his normally friendly and open manservant. Arthur's memory forces the image of Merlin yelling at him for leaving Mordred alive and not killing him when they had the chance to the front of his mind. Arthur can remember thinking that Merlin's behavior was beyond abnormal. Merlin abhorred violence, and it was always Merlin's last resort. To so vehemently suggest killing another human being was just not in Merlin's nature. As Merlin collected the armor and left the room, Arthur couldn't help but wonder again what was going on with his manservant.

/BREAK/BREAK/BREAK/

Merlin stomped into the cluttered physician quarters drenched to the skin. Huffing, he collapsed onto a bench in exhaustion, not even glancing around to see if his mentor, Gaius was in the room. Stupid prat. Merlin couldn't help but grumble in annoyance as the day's events caught up with him. After leaving Arthur's quarters, he had taken Arthur's armor to the armory to clean and repair any damages. It hadn't taken him fairly long, and he was able to finish quickly and leave to do something else. Gaius had caught him chatting with the new Queen, Gwen, and had sent him on an errand into the forests to collect some obscure herbs he needed. Merlin had only wanted a small break, not really too much to ask in his opinion, but fate had over plans. I do have other things to worry about other than running errands for Gaius or the prat. Merlin huffed again at his own annoyed thoughts. He was so tied up in his own thoughts that he nearly toppled over in shock when another voice invaded his head, "I believe you've increased my vocabulary with half the words you've been grumbling the last hour."

Merlin glanced around the room cautiously, searching for the owner of the voice he heard in his head. Not, that he didn't know who was talking; he just didn't know where he was. "I didn't give you permission to read my thoughts."

"You didn't have to. You've been broadcasting your opinions quite loudly to anyone who could hear them."

Merlin flushed at Mordred's teasing tone. Apparently, Merlin still didn't have much control over his own abilities. He was pretty sure that Mordred couldn't hear any thoughts he didn't allow him too, which meant that for the past hour, Mordred had heard every creative curse Merlin had thought up during his return from the woods. Merlin had been quite angry that he'd been unable to find the herbs he was sent out for, and on top of that it had begun to pour half way out and poor Merlin had been drenched to the skin from the downpour. Grimacing, Merlin couldn't help but feel annoyed with himself, "What do you want, Mordred?"

"I would like to request your assistance in helping me take off my armor. If you're willing that is."

Merlin shifts uncomfortable in his seat. He did not particularly want to be alone in a room with an undressed Mordred. Already, Merlin was having trouble with his erratic emotions and being that close to Mordred would only add fuel to the fire. His thoughts were cut off by an amused Mordred. "Don't worry; it's only my armor I need help with. Unless you fear you can't control yourself around me?"

Merlin narrowed his eyes at the table in front of him, since he was unable to glare at the person himself. For some reason, Mordred could read Merlin better than anyone including his mentor, Gaius and his best friend, Arthur. No matter how closed off Merlin appears, or how well-hidden Merlin believed his emotions to be, somehow Mordred could tell exactly what Merlin was thinking. "I swear if you're poking around in my mind I'll kill you."

"You're belief in my abilities are flattering, but incredibly misplaced. No one has the ability to truly read another's mind. I can only speak to you."

Pacified, Merlin sighs and stands, his mind made up. He leaves the sanctity and comfort of his home and makes his way to Mordred's chambers. "Coming," is Merlin's last reply before closing the door to the physician's chambers and strolling off down to the knight's hall.

Mordred could hear the click of his door opening, announcing the entrance of Emrys as he slipped into his rooms without even knocking. He couldn't help but smile with amusement at Emrys's blatant disregard for rules or privacy. Though, Mordred did not believe in rules much himself. He started life as a Druid and didn't think himself above anyone else just because he was made a knight recently. Mordred turned, smiling at Emrys as he anxiously entered the room, closing the door before making his way over to where Mordred stood. "Emrys, I'm glad you showed up."

Emrys gave him a strange look, a mix of annoyance and disbelief. Mordred understood the powerful warlock had an intense love, hate relationship with his other name, but for Mordred it was name that he first came to the know young man by and considered it as the warlock's true name. The Druids never would willingly call Emrys by the name, Merlin, unless it was absolutely necessary. In a way, it was the Druids way of showing respect for the destiny the manservant held in his hands.

Mordred eyed Emrys, waiting for him to finally speak up, but clearly the manservant was giving the young knight the silent treatment. "Well?"

Emrys quickly moved to help Mordred out of his armor and cloak; unclasping the golden clasp and lifting the heavy red cloak off Mordred's shoulders. Surprisingly, Emrys was quick and efficient in getting Mordred out of his armor. Mordred raised an eyebrow in question at Emrys as he pulled off the last piece of armor. "And Arthur says you can't do anything right."

Emrys snorted, the first noise he made since entering the room, "Yes, well, Arthur's a prat."

Mordred smiled, amused by Emrys's normal insult. Perhaps, if he kept pushing at the bond, he could get Emrys to open up to him. Emrys picked up the pile of armor with an uncharacteristic amount of grace and carried it off to put it away. Mordred shifted from foot to foot, trying to think of a way to get Emrys to stay in Mordred's presence more often. Slowly, an idea began to form in the back of Mordred's mind that brought a sly smile to his lips. Yes, Mordred knew exactly how he could get the powerful warlock to open up around him, "Emrys?"

Emrys turned and eyed Mordred curiously, "Yes?"

"Perhaps you could attend to me each morning and each night? I've been having trouble with my armor and do not wish to trouble any of the other servants."

Emrys raised an eyebrow, amused, "But you don't mind borrowing my time?"

Mordred's grin grew knowing he had the warlock cornered, "Well, if you don't think you can handle it then I understand…"

Mordred's voice trailed off, leaving the challenge hanging in the air. Emrys's eyes narrowed picking up on the underlining challenge in Mordred's voice. "Oh, I can handle it." An answering smirk slid onto Emrys's lips as he heads for the door calling over his shoulder, "I'll get you up bright and early tomorrow morning, then?"

Without waiting for an answer, Emrys slipped out of the room leaving Mordred standing in the middle of his own chambers wondering what the hell he got himself into.

Author's Note: So I hope you guys have enjoyed this story, as much as I have enjoyed writing it. I plan to upload the next chapter in a few days so be prepared. ~Shirley