First Japril fic…new to this fandom, but I love them together. Please enjoy and remember to review!

Chapter 1:

"Alright Mr Walters" April smiled encouragingly. "Your incisions are healing nicely with no signs of infection. I think you can be discharged today!" she beamed at the middle aged man lying in the hospital bed and his wife standing nearby.

"Thank you so much Dr Kepner!" the wife, Helen sighed gratefully, coming over and giving the ginger haired doctor a tight hug. April smiled tightly and nodded.

"No worries" she replied politely. "I'll have a nurse bring around the discharge papers and run through the discharge procedure with you. Take care of yourselves".

With a small polite wave, she exited the room with her two interns hot on her heels. She still had two more surgeries to get through today. Another appendectomy and a gall bladder removal. She knew the interns would be fighting tooth and nail to get in on either of the procedures. She smiled inwardly as she walked confidently down the hall way to the nurses' station. It felt good to hold the power.

…

Jackson Avery watched silently as he watched April walk down the hall. Her wavy red hair bouncing as she walked, a small, confident smile on her lips, shoulders back….what did she have to be happy about? They hadn't spoken since Bailey's almost wedding. Then again, he had been busy with his date. Who knew interns could actually be interesting? Stephanie had been a welcome distraction from his troubles with April. Could they even be classified as 'troubles'? They weren't together….they had never publicly been together. He didn't even know what they had been. Sex buddies? The occasional on call room hook up? The relief of pent up sexual tension? It burned him not knowing! He hated it. What's worse was that he did feel something for her. It wasn't love per say….but it was enough to make him boil at the sight of her with that intern Shane. Hearing her laughing at his jokes…smiling at him….tucking her hair shyly behind her ear. It was enough to ask her to marry him during the whole pregnancy scare. So after one too many champagnes at Bailey's non-wedding reception, he took Stephanie to him car and one thing led to another.

He hated himself for it. He never saw Stephanie as anything more than a colleague…..an intern he outranked. He didn't mean to lead her on. He had told himself he would never stoop to Karev's level and sleep around with interns. So the morning after, he told himself it was the champagne which resulted in his actions. He quickly set Stephanie straight. "It was the alcohol….I'm your boss….we work together….this is an awkward situation…I don't want to hurt your feelings, but I'm not that into you etc etc etc". It turned out ok. The intern seemed hurt at first, but then nodded in agreement and was on her way. They had mutually agreed to keep the night between themselves.

It was a week after the almost wedding and Jackson's one night stand and the guilt was weighing down his conscious like a ten tonne anchor. Luckily he and April didn't get any cases together in the last week and were mainly avoiding each other at the hospital. Their different work schedules meant they didn't see much of each other at the apartment. If they did, polite smiles and awkward small talk usually filled the air.

So instead, he sat at the nearby nurses' computer and watched her. He was desperate to talk to her. To explain everything. To feel her soft ivory skin under his fingertips. To stroke her soft ginger hair. To look into her brown eyes. To kiss her gentle lips. The desperation burned his insides with desire. Did she feel the same way? He just couldn't tell.

…

"What was he like?" Jo murmured softly to her closest friend, Stephanie as they stood waiting for Dr Kepner to finish talking to the nurse.

Stephanie smiled slyly "freakin' amazing", she replied in an excitable whisper. "You would think that all the rumours and those eyes were overrated, but no! He's just as fantastic as they say".

"I honestly can't believe that you got lucky with Dr Avery!" Jo whispered to her with a grin.

"Shhh!" Stephanie reprimanded her friend, rolling her eyes in April's direction. Jo's eyes widened in recognition. Everybody knew that Kepner and Avery had it in for each other. What exactly, nobody knew. But there were feelings lingering.

It didn't matter anyway because April caught the last two sentences the interns had exchanged and immediately her heart sank. She could feel tears welling in her eyes and she felt as if somebody had just punched her in the abdomen. She glanced down at her charts and froze, staring at them emptily. Jackson…sleeping with someone else. She really had been forgotten. All that stuff he told her. About getting married, about children….it was all out of duty. He didn't care about her. She felt so incredibly stupid for loving him.

"Dr Kepner?" Jo asked carefully, sensing the change in the attending's demeanour.

April sighed heavily and spun around quickly to face her interns. She gave them both her dirtiest stare, extra dirty in Stephanie's direction.

"You two" she barked. The two interns immediately stood a little straighter. Kepner meant business. "I want all my post ops for today done. Check everything. Twice. I want you to chase up Mr Willington's labs and then go tell Pathology to hurry up with the results of Mrs Prasad's MRI and CT. Go over my pre-op for the appendectomy, then make sure Dr Robbins is across everything with my paediatric patients, especially Charley from 2239 because I've got her surgery tomorrow. The gall bladder patient in 3356 has been complaining of severe discomfort so make sure he's been taken care of. Got it?" she demanded heatedly.

The two interns nodded furiously before walked away quickly. April sighed heavily in defeat, sighing off her last charts before walking quickly into the nearest on-call room. She made sure it was empty before she flopped down onto the nearest bunk, face down. She buried her face into the pillow and let out a muffled scream. She didn't want to cry. She wanted to scream in anger. How could she be so stupid? How could she hold onto these stupid lingering feelings for Jackson after he had clearly spelled out they didn't have a relationship or a future? Part of her still hated herself for allowing him to take her virginity. For giving it to him. She yearned to feel his chiselled body and his look into his gorgeous eyes. There was nobody else for her. Half the doctors at Seattle Grace either didn't respect her or simply didn't know her. Jackson was her oldest friend still left with her. She hated what the whole situation had done to their friendship. She the awkwardness and the silence and the weirdness. She just wanted to go back to what they hated. The laughing and the jokes. How he would stand up for her and offer a shoulder of support when things got tough. She desperately wanted that back. So much that she let out another muffled scream into the pillow.

Suddenly a soft knock on the door made April jump in surprise. "April?" a lowered voice asked.

"Come in" she replied, sitting up straighter on the bed and fixing up her ruffled auburn hair. She could have almost had a heart attack when she saw Jackson step into the room, a shy awkward smile on his face.

"You ok?" he asked. The concern was evident in his clear blue eyes and it caught April a little of guard. She always melted for those eyes.

"Yep" she smiled a little too brightly. Jackson immediately knew it was a lie. She lifted an awkward hand and smoothed her frizzy hair, glancing down at the floor in an attempt to avoid eye contact with him.

"It's just that…" he walked closer towards her. "I heard sounds coming from in here. Were you crying?"

"No!" she exclaimed defensively. "I just…." she sighed deeply fumbling with her fingers. "Needed a moment. Been a long day".

"April I…." he started, glancing at her longingly. "We need to talk about…..us".

"So talk" she replied shrugging her shoulders. She was sick of his indirectness. She just wanted everything out in the open and she wanted him to make the first move. Better him than her…she would probably just burst out into tears and blubbering words.

"I just want to clear up everything. To know where we stand with each other", Jackson explained to her, pulling up a chair directly opposite her.

"I know where you stand" she told him indignantly. "Or should I say lie…apparently it's with interns!" she exclaimed. Jackson couldn't mistake the hurt in her tone. He hated hurting her. Sighing as he rubbed his face with his hands he glanced at her and unmistakably saw the tears forming in her eyes.

"You heard huh?" he asked gently.

"She had no problem bragging about it to her friends" April retorted, crossing her arms defensively.

Jackson made a mental note to reprimand Stephanie later on about that. Right now, he had to fix this.

"April, please listen" he pleaded. "That…night with Edwards…it was a total mistake…..we were drunk….I guess I was still hurting about…you know…"

"So it's my fault now?" April demanded furiously, her voice rising.

"No of course not" Jackson raised his hands defensively. "I'm just saying that Edwards was there in the moment and one thing led to another. It meant nothing. I felt terrible about it immediately….and I set Edwards straight about it. There is nothing happening between us two. There never will be". Jackson tempted fate by reaching out and placing his hand gently on top of April's. She noticed immediately and shook him off, standing up and walking across the room. Jackson mirrored her and stood too, facing her but remaining near the bed.

"So what now?" April asked, her body beginning to tremble. Jackson wanted nothing more than to walk over and embrace her. To take her in his arms and make love to her there and then. To prove his feelings for her. "Why are you telling me this? We're separate people Jackson, I don't need to know the details of your personal life and affairs with staff" she told him wryly, wrapping her arms around herself.

"April…" he took a step closer. "I think you know the answer to that question", he smiled knowingly. His bright eyes were enough to make her melt slightly.

"I know" she mumbled, glancing down at the ground for a second before her brown eyes met his blue and they locked gazes. "I want to hear you say it", she whispered gently, a single tear rolling down her ivory cheek.

How he wanted to reach out and wipe it away! He took a step closer, still smiling.

"Say it!" April repeated quietly, warningly.

"April…" he took another step….reaching out…. "I" a step "love" another step "you" he stopped arm's length away from her and grinned. It felts amazing to say those three words out loud. She allowed the tears to run freely and soon she was crying.

"Are you ok?" he asked, leaning down to gaze into her eyes. She glanced up and nodded before flinging herself into him, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck. She stood on her tip toes and leaned up so that her lips reached his ears.

"I love you too" she whispered into his ear with a grin.

That was the trigger. Before she could react, Jackson had turned and clicked the door locked and returned to pick her up from the ground and leading her to the nearby bed where only a few minutes earlier she had been screaming silently.

….

Enjoy! Merry Christmas!

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