A/N I added a character, Piers' brother Allen.

I'm Keeping You

Always

The same old run-down bar, the same old watered down whisky, it was like a bad song playing on repeat. This was his retreat, his safe haven and it was also the place no one would think to find him. Chris had a habit of running away. Despite bringing the world's largest threat to an end, countering bioterrorism attacks and facing death every day, he was a coward.

He knew it and it was only a matter of time before others found out. This was the place he was sure no one would find him and yet there sat a young man, looking to be in his mid-twenties. Of course Piers would follow him, no doubt checking up on his commander. The younger BSAA member seemed to be minding his own business, chewing thoughtfully on a piece of steak before washing it down with what Chris assumed was water. The spiky haired man seemed different now that Chris really took the time to study him, he looked older maybe. Deep blue eyes closed as the BSAA tried to remember how the younger man had looked upon their first meeting.

Chris Redfield was a legend, a hero. Piers would give anything to meet the man behind the idol. What had led to this almost unhealthy obsession?

It started with abandonment. There wasn't much to say about Piers' father except that the man was a drill sergeant. Nothing could ever be out of the ordinary in his family, perhaps that's why when Piers came out to his family as gay, they let him out of their lives. But it wasn't all bad, his older brother had taken him in and they lived together until Piers turned eighteen. The two boys had always gone hunting and to target practice with their father, so it came as no surprise when Allen announced that he wanted to join the Air Force.

Piers started off quite lonely when his brother left, but with time he slowly learned to accept it. The frequent letters and online chats helped the young boy out immensely. Allen would always talk about Chris Redfield, a badass who hardly ever listened to their instructors and always did his own thing. The man was a marksmen as well as a flying Ace. When Piers heard these stories he couldn't wait to meet this amazing superhero. His brother always told him he would introduce them when he got back from his tour, but he never did. Allen had died in a plane crash two weeks before he was scheduled to come home. The news devastated Piers, he had a rough time trying to accept that his closest companion was gone.

Time heals all wounds as they say and soon Piers heard that Chris Redfield had created an association known as the BSAA. He didn't even give it a second thought. Piers signed up for the BSAA, acceding in all the physical training tests. After her made it he threw himself into his work, quickly becoming the best sniper in the BSAA. After years of hard work he finally got to meet the hero himself, Chris Redfield.

"Captain Redfield? I-It's a pleasure to meet you sir, I'm Nivans, Piers Nivans." The tall brunette looked down into the bright slate blue eyes that belonged to the newest member of his team. The shorter man stood straight, his hand going up to his forehead to salute his leader. The usual steady hand twitched slightly as the older man stifled a chuckle.

"Nice to meet you too." The brunette returned the jerky salute with a confident one of his own. "Just relax, I'm no hero. And call me Chris." Piers shuffled, running a hand through his gelled hair and averting his eyes. He would have never thought the Great Chris Redfield would be such a laid back person.

"Erm, then you can call me Piers. I-if you'd like to I mean." Finally their eyes locked and Piers couldn't decipher the look dancing in his idol's ocean like orbs. For a split second there was something akin to understanding in them, until it was pushed away and replaced with some other emotion Piers wouldn't be able to name.

"We're a team. We watch out for each other here, everyone comes back. I'm counting on you to help me make sure of that, alright Piers?"

"What are you so deep in thought about?" The sudden voice shook Chris out of his musings, his eyes snapping in the direction of his longtime partner, friend and perhaps a little more. Despite the faint numbness in his head, Chris was able to answer the patient man.

"You know what I'm thinking about Piers." Was that voice his? It seemed so gruff and foreign, even to his own ears. The commander shook his head clear, trying to ignore the guilt building up in his throat by downing another drink.

"Are you still hung up about that? It was an accident Chris, you couldn't have known how things were gonna go." The young soldier put his silverware down, his eyebrows drawn and his stormy eyes focused on his moping hero.

"It doesn't matter Piers, they were my men. I've lost too many people in this stupid fight and I'm tired of it." And it showed by the way the brunette slumped in his seat, his elbows resting heavily on the counter. He seemed so much more human all of a sudden. Like he hadn't just saved a town from a bioterrorist attack. Piers leaned back, thinking of the first time he realized his idol was not all he was cracked up to be.

"God dammit." The commander cursed, his hands fumbling to reload his weapon. Piers shot with deadly accuracy at the… Abominations running towards them. He was running low on ammo as well. The entire team had been wiped out when they walked into an ambush. These mutated freaks were the ones responsible for their untimely deaths and Chris had ignored the urge to run, deciding to stay and avenge his men.

That, of course, meant that Piers was staying too. He wouldn't abandon Chris, not now, not ever. What had started as admiration had quickly become something more. With every mission, every glance, even every order; Piers found himself falling. He would never admit it. Hell, he couldn't even admit it to himself but there was something about the way the commander was so dedicated that sent him reeling.

A dull click sounded and Piers knew the end was near. A mutated freak, or J'avo, had gotten much too close for comfort and the sniper had the misfortune of being directly in the way of the charging monstrosity. It's black, gangly limb reared back, prepped to make the final blow when a strong hand shoved the small man's shoulder.

Piers went tumbling onto the hard dirt, landing with a stinging skid. His steal eyes rose, widening as he realized it had been Chris that had pushed him out of the way and in doing so was now suffering the consequences of being impaled through the lower stomach.

What happened after that was all a blur, Piers quickly reached for his Glock, watching as Chris struggled to keep the monster from running him through. With precision he didn't know he could still have in such a state, he shot the attacker in the head, the creature pulling back and reaching a hand up to cradle its broken and bleeding skull. A second shot ended it all and Piers sighed with relief as he realized the rest of the J'avo were quite a ways away.

Shaky steps led him to his fallen commander's side. A gloved hand blocked the injury from view, though the blood was still very noticeable. What was once green vest was now splattered with crimson, the stain gradually spreading. Blurry dark eyes looked up at him, the man's face morphed into a painful grimace. That was when the severity of the situation hit Piers. Chris Redfield was not a god, he was a man, and men can die.

He gently moved the large hand away from the puncture, his eyes taking in all the details of the wound. It was deep, very deep but it did not go through him. Blood leaked from the slice, adding to the already copious amount growing on the man's stomach.

"C'mon Captain, I can't fix this on my own." Their rendezvous was close, well a mile away but they did still have one of the Humvees. Careful steps led them to the vehicle, the older of the two panting hard and trying to control his breathing. The sniper worked quickly, assisting the injured soldier into the SUV before searching for and medical supplies. He handed the man the gauze he found, and Chris held it tightly to his side, willing the blood to stop.

"I'm so sorry Captain, I wasn't focused, I hurt you and I'm sorry. I was just so careless." Light blue eyes looked over at the heaving hero, surprised to find a smirk residing on his handsome face.

"Dammit Piers, we're partners, I'm not gonna lose you. This isn't your fault." The younger man nodded slightly, his heart swelling slightly at the man's words. The rough voice still echoed in his ears. No Captain Chris Redfield was indeed human. "Besides I lost the team so I'm keeping you."

The sniper hadn't realized he had begun talking until he looked over at the older man. Chris was staring at him, his jaw clenched at the memory. He hated when Piers would bring up old losses. All of his men were important, they all had someone waiting for them, someone they never returned to.

"I remember that." The captain admitted softly, his eyes flicking at Piers before returning to look at the glass in his hand. Grey blue eyes noticed that the BSSA agent seemed a little more inebriated than he did before. He must have drank quite a bit during the story for there to be a noticeable difference.

"Do you remember that time you kissed me?" Piers asked with a grin. The older man scowled at him, cloudy eyes scanning the room to see if anyone had noticed, they didn't seem to. So Chris decided to play along, for now.

"Which time?" There had been many times. Sometimes it was sloppy due to alcohol, other times it was hard and fast but the moment Piers remembered was the very first one, the shy and uncertain brush of the mouth. The one that started it all. All this messing around, this relationship. It had literally changed everything.

"First time." Piers responded just as softly, his eyes never leaving the dark blue that were suddenly on him. He was pinned by the hard gaze of the man he once referred to as Captain. He could practically see the gears turning in the brunette's head, a large hand coming up to rub at his stubbly chin absentmindedly as his memories carried him away.

Christmas Eve. It was a time to spend with family. Piers had been walking aimlessly sometime in the early afternoon, his hands in his pockets and his scarf pulled tightly around his face and ears to block out the chill that threatened to engulf him. He didn't have anywhere to go. It was this time of the year that made him feel lonelier than ever. With his head ducked he didn't even see the person walking towards him. The taller man didn't see him either, it wasn't until the two collided that they realized they knew each other. Piers landed on the ground, a bulky form towering over him.

"Piers?"

"Chris?" The two looked at each other, the stronger man offering his hand to his fallen friend. Piers could feel his cheeks burn with embarrassment, but running into the captain was like hitting a brick wall, there was no way he could have stayed standing.

"Sorry about that, I was checking this list Claire gave me, she asked me to pick up some last minute dinner things so I didn't see you." The large man gestured to the bags in his left hand before offering the younger male a goofy smile.

"It's no problem Capta-Chris." Piers internally chided himself, the captain had specifically told him after their little stabbing incident to start calling him by his first name and the transition wasn't exactly easy for the young soldier.

"Where are you headed?" The spiky haired guy shrugged, he didn't have any plans. "You're more than welcome to come to my place, Claire and I are having a small celebration with our friends and you're more than welcome to join us."

That was how he ended up in the Redfield household, more specifically Chris' house. Piers had been leaning awkwardly against the wall as he watched everyone receive gifts until a very energetic and friendly Claire pulled him towards the circle of friends and pushed him in the middle.

To say he felt awkward would have been an understatement, Piers glanced around at the people surrounding him. He finally got the message when Chris nudged him and whispered.

"Introduce yourself." Chris grinned slightly as the smaller male shivered involuntarily as his hot breath ticked the side of the thin neck.

"Hi, I'm Piers Nivans." And just like that he was initiated into the group and everyone began to converse with him. Claire and Chris watched from the kitchen, a smirk beginning to crawl onto her face at her brother's lovesick expression.

"Someone's got a cruuush." The auburn hair girl sang with a grin. Her older brother turned to look at her, his face exasperated.

"I do not!" The man replied indignantly, looking back over at his friends to hide the slight blush on his face. Here he was acting like some teenage boy with a crush. Who blushes when they reach their thirties?

Deep blue eyes narrowed as Rebecca laid her hand softly on Piers' shoulder. The two were around the same age, they would make for a cute couple and everyone around them seemed oblivious to the blatant flirting going on right in front of them. With a slight huff, Chris carried himself to the door, walking out into the frigid night and watching as the snow began to fall.

He shouldn't be this focused on Piers. It was unhealthy, it had to be.

It was a while before suddenly the object of his thoughts came through the door and joined him on the porch. They stood in silence for a while, both staring up at the sky.

"I like the snow, my brother and I used to watch it all the time." A small, serene smile spread on Piers' face. The kind of calm that holds so much sorrow, it was the way Claire used to smile when she talked about their parents. Hell, it was probably the way Chris used to smile too.

"Oh yeah?" He wouldn't push Piers to speak about his family. Chris knew about his brother, hell he knew his brother. And according to the sniper's profile, that was his closest family member.

"He talked about you, you know. He told me I would have loved to meet you… He was right." Piers offered him a remorseful smile, Chris simply stared back. There no words to say in a moment like this so Chris decided to do what he does best, act. It took a few seconds for the older man to close the space between them, his hand moving to Piers' jaw. The shorter male was frozen in place but he didn't look unwilling so Chris closed the space, gently pressing his lips against the snipers. Slightly hesitant lips pressed back before the two pulled away.

"What was that for?" Piers questioned, his eyes lit up with some emotion Chris would not yet recognize.

"That was your Christmas gift."

"But I have nothing to give you." Piers stated as if he couldn't just kiss the older man back. The captain shrugged, his dark eyes returning to the sky.

"I'm keeping you."

"God dammit Piers! Why are you making me remember this?!" The patrons in the bar looked up at the sudden outburst. The tall man offered them an icy glare as Piers suddenly shot up, his eyes never leaving Chris'.

"Because Captain you seem to have forgotten EVERYTHING the BSAA has ever worked for! Maybe you need to remember our past so you get why fighting is so important!" Hard glares met head on. It wasn't often that Piers would lose his cool to Chris, but a drunk Chris was more than a nuisance to him.

"Fighting has gotten my men killed! I'm tired of this bullshit!" Suddenly the bartender banged on the bar, his brown eyes narrow and accusing.

"Stop yelling! It's time for you to leave!" Piers stormed out of the establishment without hesitation, leaving brown eyes to stare into the defiant ones of Chris Redfield. The brunette grabbed his bottle before yanking the door open and following after Piers. The two stood in an alleyway, the shorter of the duo not even offering his companion so much as a glance.

"Well now you've made an ass of yourself." Chris scoffed, taking a drink out of his bottle and glaring out into the night sky.

"I don't give a damn what they think." The older man slurred, his vision beginning to get that haze to it. Piers leaned against the wall, his arms crossed.

"Look, I'm just saying fighting is why we got together, don't you remember that? What about those… Other times, remember those?" Chris didn't even flinch or move to acknowledge his lover, he simply stood, taking a long drink out of the bottle.

It didn't matter who started it, either way they had somehow managed to wait until they gotten home to act on the things they had been feeling all night. After the kiss the pair had decided to make it official. Well in their group of friends, the BSAA was a different story. After getting together they became a better team, however they had to keep things strictly professional. And that included acting like platonic friends at the dinner the BSAA was holding.

The both had been wearing suits and all night they couldn't help but sneak glances at one another. The same thought raced through their minds; that suit would look better on the floor. So that's why the minute the door to Chris' house shut, their lips were sealed, tongues eagerly seeking one another. They managed to make it to his bedroom the only casualty being their overcoats and Piers' vest. Piers pulled the older man closer as he fell onto the bed, Chris catching himself carefully so he doesn't crash onto the younger soldier. Their lips melding seamlessly and the older male's stubble rubbing against his chin in a way he has come to love.

Thick fingers ran down Piers' heated neck, ending up unclasping the buttons holding the shirt in place. Chris' mouth followed the trail his fingers had made, taking a moment to focus on that one spot that makes Piers' hips jerk against his. He loves that spot and can't resist sinking his teeth into it slightly. The feverish kisses continue down until they are stopped by the sudden appearance of clothing. Chris pulls away slightly, pushing the dress shirt off of Piers shoulders, one hand moving down to confidently grasp the evident bulge in the shorter man's pants. The sniper lets out a muffled moan at the contact, his hips arching off the bed.

"Y-you guh-" The younger male is momentarily sidetracked as the hand slips into the hem of his pants and boxers, slowly stroking the growing appendage. "You too." Piers ends lamely, gesturing to Chris' shirt. The brunette lets the sniper undo the button up, his nimble fingers undoing the first button before just pulling the clothing over Chris' head.

"Someone's impatient." Chris grins, his hand still moving torturously slow. Piers' hands move down, running over the older man's hard muscles before ending at the man's lower stomach, the fingers resting slightly above the older man's hip.

"I still feel bad about this." Piers pants as he glides the pads of his fingers over the scar adorning Chris' body. The hand currently wrapped around his shaft stops, before tightening slightly and stroking at a faster pace. Piers' groans at the feeling, all regret and guilt lost as he gives into the feelings Chris is evoking. His hands rush to undo his captain's pants, before pulling the older man's pants and underwear off in one go. Chris' own member springing free. Piers wraps his hand around it slightly, grinning when his hero lets out a shuddering breath and begins to harden even further in his hand.

With a slight nervous grin Piers presses kisses down Chris' overheated body, paying attention to the faded scar before reaching his destination. Despite having already done this once before he can't help but feel nervous as he runs his tongue up the underside of Chris' erection. The older man groans, his hands fisting in the bed sheets as Piers slowly puts his mouth around the head of Chris' penis. Judging by the low expletive Chris groans out, he's doing pretty good this time around. Piers tries his best to lick and suck in a way that Chris is sure to like when suddenly the captain stops him.

"Your turn." Without any further warning Chris practically rips Piers' remaining clothes off, his patience having run out. As his head dipped down to slowly take Piers into his mouth he slowly moves his fingers to Piers' back running down his spine before finding their target. Piers is too focused on the feeling of Chris' warm mouth surrounding him to even notice the sudden intrusion. His hand slowly ran through the captain's short brown hair, the man bucking his hips in response to the finger being added. He hadn't even realized Chris was touching him. Piers is so close, so close to reaching the end, his moans stringing together with muttering Chris' name. Once again the captain stops him.

"This might feel weird again." Chris warns before slowly he inches his throbbing member into Piers' tight hole. Their lips meet again with a fiery passion, both to muffle Piers' noise of discomfort and Chris' moan. The older man pauses. waiting for Piers to relax. When he finally does Chris begins to move slowly, and it isn't until Piers wraps his legs around his hips that he begins to thrust faster. Piers breaks from the kiss to moan loudly into the pillow, Chris' hand runs to grasp Piers' hot member as he continues to pound into him. The feelings continue radiating through the duo until finally the reach the end, their vision getting hazy for a moment as the both come.

Piers lays against Chris, focusing slowly on the older man's heartbeat. It was beginning to slow down as the man began to drift off into sleep.

"I love you." Piers blurted suddenly, his blue eyes raking over Chris' sculpted chin and strong jaw. At first he felt embarrassed but then he realized it was the truth so he didn't have the heart to take it back.

"I love you too." Came the rough drowsy voice, the words causing his entire chest to vibrate. "I love you so I'm keeping you."

"I remember them all. Of course I remember." Chris said softly, not feeling any effect from the alcohol aside from a slight headache and blurry vision.

"Then our fighting wasn't for nothing, it counted for something." Piers assured, smiling at his captain's back. He was sure that as BSAA members, they had done something right, and he didn't think any of the men they lost would disagree.

"But because we fought, we lost so many people." Chris said, still not glancing back. He couldn't help but feel responsible, it was all his fault.

"You'll find new recruits Chris, you will." The bulky brunette scoffed, his eyes staring across the street. The alley was so dark, hardly anyone noticed the two. They would notice him soon enough, Piers' words were beginning to aggravate him. He could feel the tears begin to sting his eyes.

"It doesn't matter who I find because no matter what they can't replace you!" Chris screamed, turning and throwing his bottle at the person he loved more than anything in this world. Just as expected the bottle exploded against the wall, its contents spilling on the ground. Chris turned and stared brokenly across the street, tears running down his face.

"Why are you torturing me with these visions of things I can never get back? You're DEAD. You died to save me and you come back here and make me relive all these things, WHY? Because it will change that fact I didn't get to keep you, it will change the fact that I lost you? It won't so just LEAVE!" When he turned back around he was met with nothing, nothing but air and an abandoned alleyway. He hates himself for drinking because that's the only way he can see Piers again, he hate himself for the way he keeps setting himself up for a broken heart. But for some reason he just can't stop wanting his vision to become real, so until it does he'll just have to be a bad song playing on repeat. Because he'd do anything to keep Piers.