All afternoon, she fretted and fidgeted, clutching her phone so that she'd know the exact moment he texted.

He didn't.

Gates held forth for hours on how a breakdown in inter-departmental communication had shamed her in front of a reporter.

Then she needed figures and stats.

Then it was something else.

And one more thing.

And could you just.

And I need that on my desk before you leave.

Part of her screamed in frustration at not being able to get away. But a deeply shameful, cowardly part was grateful for the legitimate excuse to put off seeing him. She hated that such good intentions had gone so badly wrong, and that Lanie'd had to be roped in as well.

It was all her fault. The regret and anxiety went to her stomach and ensured that it was a very uncomfortable afternoon, which turned into a miserable evening. To cap it off, tomorrow was her first day off in two weeks, and it was already ruined.

By the time she trudged out of the precinct at ten pm, she was completely drained. She half expected him to be waiting at her apartment, primed for the blow-up of the century.

He wasn't.

She let herself in and had some soup and crackers. She couldn't concentrate to read or watch tv, so she took a hot shower, poured herself a stiff drink, and fell into bed.

***

She slept badly, plagued by wakefulness, self-recrimination, and visions of how the inevitable painful confrontation would likely play out. She rehearsed it over and over, trying to craft the words that would change the outcome.

As daylight began to glow around the curtains, she yanked her too-hot pajama bottoms off and fell into a fitful sleep.

She woke with a start when a weight settled on the bed beside her hip, and it took her a second to process what she was seeing.

Castle.

How did he get in?

She took a breath to calm herself. Right, he had a key now.

She swallowed. "Castle." The word held all her fear and regret.

His expression was soft and warm. "Shh. It's okay."

"No, it's not, I – "

He touched his index finger to her lips, and spoke quietly. "I'm telling you it is."

"I can't imagine how you must have felt… And then I didn't hear from you. I felt sick all day."

"I was upset at first. Not really with you. Just… mortified." He studied a spot on the floor. "I suppose Lanie told you I was hard when she arrived."

Oh, God. "No, she didn't say that. She sent me a text saying she'd unlocked you and was on her way back to work. Nothing else. We were both busy after that, and I didn't get a chance to talk to her." She held his gaze. "I'm so sorry. You must be furious. I know it was humiliating, and - "

"Oh, it was beyond humiliating, but I have to take the blame for cuffing myself without you being there. That was stupid; I should've waited. I was so eager to give you a sexy surprise that I took the risk."

"Oh, Rick." She pulled him down, and kissed him.

Eventually he came up for air, frowning. "You don't look well."

"Bad night," she said, and with more difficulty admitted, "I was worrying about you. I was afraid you were really angry with me."

He smiled slightly. "Well, now that you know that's not the case, let's see what we can do to make you all better."

Without a word, he pushed the covers down and urged her onto her stomach with a firmness that both puzzled and excited her. He put the covers back over her so that only her bottom was exposed, while the rest of her stayed safely hidden.

He caressed her buttocks over her blue silk panties. She felt the soft touch of his mouth on her as her kissed her ass – oh, how she was going to remind him of that later – and squirmed her approval. "Keep still," he said, pushing a hand under the slippery fabric.

She rolled onto her back. "Don't, Castle, I don't deserve –"

He put a finger to his lips. "Katherine Beckett, I love you. Close your eyes, and trust me. I'm going to make everything all right."

She took a breath, and tried to obey. A bag rustled. "Keep them closed," he said, and suddenly his cool hand was covering her closed eyelids. Something rubbery pressed against her lips, but his hand stalled her little jolt of surprise. "I want you to take this in your mouth."

"What – "

"Take it easy," he said, gently. "Keep them closed, and trust me."

She did. She owed him that. A broad silicone probe slipped into her mouth like an oversized pacifier. There was even a guard that pressed against her lips, making sure she couldn't choke on it. After a moment of alarm, she found she could breathe perfectly well, but not move her tongue enough to speak.

His blue eyes studied her intently, alert to the slightest indication of panic or pain. "Okay?" he said, softly.

After an experimental semi-swallow, she nodded. It felt incredibly strange, and the urge to expel it was strong. Oh, God she needed it out now. She reached for it, and he grasped her wrist.

"No, Kate. Keep it in. Just relax." His warm hand rubbed slow, soothing patterns between her tense shoulder blades. "Suck it," he said.

She did, and was surprised when a little squirt of water came out of the tip, a welcome counter to the dryness of her mouth.

He smiled. "Again."

She gave it another, stronger pull, and was rewarded with another dribble of liquid. It was a little like sucking his cock, and as a little dribble ran out of her mouth, she was gratified to hear a moan from her partner.

She tried to wipe her chin, but he stopped her. "Leave it."

"Good girl," he said. "I can see it's not easy for you, so I'm not going to secure it in place, but you're not allowed to take it out yourself. If you need it to be removed, you hold up two fingers and I'll do it. Clear?"

She nodded.

"It's to take the pressure off you. I want you to suckle it, and not feel like you need to say anything to me, because you don't."

Her eyes filled with tears, and she nodded again. As she calmed, she realized there was something about his dominating her like this that thrilled her, and was a little self conscious about it. She could feel him watching her, and opened her eyes.

He smiled. "Don't be embarrassed. It's okay to enjoy this, Kate. It's okay to take what you need." He rubbed her hand. "And now I want you to turn over."

Allowing herself this moment of surrender, she obeyed. It was okay. She could enjoy this.

He moved her panties aside. Deft fingers parted her buttocks, and something cool and wet pressed against her entrance. He let her feel it there for a few moments, until she squirmed. The cool probe slid inside with a long, easy push, relaxing and stimulating her at the same time. It was the first time he'd done this without asking permission. His hand rested on her rear end, slipping… well, it had to be a thermometer… all the way in, and never quite out.

She closed her eyes and let herself enjoy being attended to so intimately.

He reached lower and filled her with his fingers, manipulating her body expertly. As soon as she moaned and clamped down on them, they were gone, and she wanted to cry out in frustration.

"Sorry," he said, but he didn't sound sorry.

The mattress creaked as he reached over to open the top drawer of her bedside table, and pulled out a couple of things. They thudded onto the bed on his other side, out of her view. She raised herself a little to see, but he smiled and shook his head, and pushed her down with a firm hand on her back.

"All in good time, my dear detective."

He moved off the bed and quickly shed his clothes. He let her drink in the sight him standing there, the evidence of just how much he wanted her in full view. He was beautiful, and kind, and she didn't know how she ever got so lucky as to have arrived at this moment, here, with him.

She smiled as well as she could around the thing in her mouth. He smiled back, leaned down, and and pushed the covers right off her before returning to sit on the bed at her hip. A cap popped open, and noises of wet friction followed. She shivered in delicious anticipation.

"Sorry about this, but it has to be done." He grabbed the side of her silk panties, and tore them in half. She moaned – half in arousal, half in regret, as they were her favorites – and felt him pull them away.

It was his turn to moan. "God, Kate, look at you. If you were anyone else, I'd have been done by now. But with you, I just want to make it last and last."

His hand slipped down between her legs again, and she lifted her hips, urging him to get on with it, already. He laughed. "Is this a bad time to make a joke about an eager beaver?"

She groaned.

"Thought so."

He spread her folds with his fingers, and eased her long, nubbly vibrator all the way in with no resistance. As vibes from her collection went, this one was quite slender, and she wanted to be filled, to feel nothing but him. She shook her head, and pointed to the drawer.

"What? You don't like this one?"

She managed to make a noise that was some approximation of "Thicker."

"Well,I've just had my fingers in there, and I feel pretty confident in saying I know exactly how much you can take. And sweetheart," he bent down and whispered in her ear, "I'm not done yet."

She felt him grasp the glass instrument in her anus and the slow, breath-stopping slide as he gently tugged it from her. There was silence for a moment, and she knew he was actually reading the result.

"I'm satisfied with your temperature."

Somehow the level of dominance he showed when insisting on examining her in this way and then pronouncing judgment on it, had the effect of producing a new gush of sticky wetness between her legs.

He leaned over and put the thermometer on the bedside table, then cupped her low on her ass. He caressed her for a few moments, then pushed his middle finger between her cheeks, and into her anus. Feeling his digit moving inside her was exquisite. She closed her eyes and keened her need as his finger skewered in deeper.

His eyes darkened, his gaze intensified. "I'm going to take you here," he said, wiggling his finger, "but first I want you to watch me."

He showed her a bulbous, gently curving butt plug. He lubed it generously, lay down beside her, pulled his right leg up, and reached behind himself. He blushed, but looked her straight in the eyes. She saw on his face the exact moment the insertion began, and moaned with him, imagining how it felt, what it took for him to show her this. His eyes closed, halfway between pleasure and discomfort as it slipped deeper into his body, and finally came to rest against his prostate.

She watched, mesmerized, suckling hard at the gag. She loved that he felt safe to do this with her. Next time they did this, she'd stimulate his prostate for him.

He sat up, carefully so as not to dislodge the toy, and picked up a bottle with a long, thickly tapered nozzle about as wide around as his middle finger. Once again she was exposed to him, and the unyielding plastic applicator easily overcame her body's resistance. He didn't rush to get the job done, but slowly fucked her with the nozzle, opening her up, getting her ready for more. She imagined it was his cock in there. Suddenly a cool gush of lube filled her back passage, and she gasped, close to the edge.

He pressed his hand to the base of her spine, grounding her. "Easy. Not yet." He smiled. "I was talking to me, by the way." He waited until her tremors subsided and her breathing slowed, then withdrew the nozzle and quickly put on a condom.

His hands urged her into position and made sure the vibrator was still in as deeply as possible. She took as deep a breath as she could as he parted her cheeks and pressed his tip against her. It popped just inside, and they both gasped. He adjusted his grip on her hips and pushed in with a long, forceful slide. His first thrusts were slow for her benefit and she felt him trembling with the effort it took to hold back. He needed to let go. They both did.

She reached down and turned the vibrator on. He cried out and began thrusting wildly, uncontrollably. She doubted he'd have heard her if she told him to stop, but she didn't want him to.

She came first, screaming her release around the gag as he drove her forward into the mattress. A pulsing warmth in her ass confirmed he'd come as well, filling the condom inside her. He slowed, but didn't stop until they both collapsed, boneless and sated. She reached down and turned the vibrator off, but left it where it was, enjoying the fullness.

He brushed her hair aside and kissed the back of her neck. "Thank you." He pulled out of her gently, and rolled to the side. He looked deeply into her eyes, and smiled, touching her jaw. "I think we can dispense with this for now."

She opened her mouth, and allowed him to remove the gag. For a moment she almost missed it. She touched her mouth and was embarrassed to realize how much she'd drooled when they'd been so carried away. He took a cleansing cloth from the bedside table. She reached for it, but he batted her hand away.

"Stop that, I said I'd take care of you, and that means everything," he smiled, removing the saliva and sweat from her face and neck. "I take it as a compliment that you got so messy for me."

She laughed, and he spread her buttocks and cleaned her gently and very thoroughly. In return, she took a wipe from the packet. She pulled the condom off him, and wiped him down. His cock jerked a little from her attentions, and she simply held it for a few moments, enjoying the feel of him in her hand. He gave a little, reflexive thrust, and she knew it wouldn't be long before he was ready to go again.

He reached behind himself to withdraw the plug. He winced as it slipped free with a sucking sound. She winced in sympathy, and he grinned a little self-consciously. "It was worth it."

He moved to lie on his back, but this time it was her turn to stop him, cleaning him so intimately.

He smiled at her, and there was such love in his eyes that she felt an answering ache in her own chest.

"Are you feeling better?" he asked, using a wipe to clean his hands and hers.

She grinned. "You owe me silk panties."

He grinned even wider. "I would love to go silk panty shopping with you."

She laughed, and pulled him to her.

End.