"Dear Arnold,
It's been a while since I saw you and your stupid football-shaped head last. Can't say I miss it too much, but all the kids here could still sure use your goody-goody advice. Heck, you might even say I wouldn't mind it anymore. Don't get any big ideas, bucko.
Big Bob and Miriam still argue about Olga's 'new' career choice. I told you about that before, right? She wants to be a Broadway actress now. So much for teaching, huh? Sure, she hasn't landed any parts, probably irritates all the directors. HAH!
And don't start going on about how special sibling relationships are supposed to be either. You."
Helga paused in writing her letter as soon as the loud bell rang, marking the ending of the day's final period. She had English Literature for her last period this year as a sophomore, and the teacher had given them ten minutes to work on their homework since the day's lesson plan had finished sooner than expected. Helga doubted any of them were actually doing the homework.well, besides her long time best friend, Phoebe. She only stared momentarily at the shrilling bell with one half of her unibrow raised, and then began to collect her things after it finished. Most of the students were leaving the room by the time she stood, prattling away about weekend plans. It was a Friday.
"Do you have any plans scheduled for this weekend, Helga?" Phoebe asked, her face the usual pleasant expression.
Helga's was the opposite and she snorted softly. "Yeah, see how many times I can snatch the TV remote from Big Bob, avoid Miriam, and ignore Olga." Helga was prone to call her parents by their first names.she never considered them much of parents at all.
They continued chatting as they strolled into the hallway, pressing through the throng of excited students rushing to leave as soon as possible. "Well, I've heard of an exceedingly invigorating and educational cinematic thriller about."
"No thanks, Pheebs. I'm not in the mood for movies this week." She sighed, strolling down the curving steps of the old, musty high school.
Phoebe hugged her books to her chest, wishing her friend would be more social. "I'll call you later in the evening, is that all right?"
"Sounds good. Bye, Pheebs." With that, she turned to her locker, spinning the combination and grabbing her things to pack up. Phoebe stood there momentarily, wondering if she should try and suggest Helga come out this weekend. Still she knew it was futile at this point in time and started off down the thinning out hallways to her own locker by the computer room. Specially requested, of course.
Helga finished putting her few books away for the homework she hadn't done in study hall when Stinky, Sid, and Harold came by. "Hey, Helga." Harold said in a singsong voice purposely used to taunt her.
"What is it, pink boy?" She snapped, slinging the bag over her shoulder and spinning to face him. She called him that since his skin seemed more tinged pink than most. He was overweight, though muscled, with a wide nose to match his belly.
Stinky stepped in before the conversation turned into a growling match, towering over the two with his height, as thin as a pencil. "We just wanted to ask if you were gonna join the stickball game come Sunday on account of you usually do." He drawled in his thick southern accent.
"Yeah." Sid added on, jutting his thumb over his shoulder at an approaching figure. "Seeing as Eugene's out since he kind of broke his leg after that incident with the Jolly Olly Man after the football game last week."
Eugene hobbled by on his crutch saying a chipper, "I'm okay! Really, guys! I'm sure I can still make it," only to be accidentally smacked in the head by a wayward football someone was tossing in the hallway. He fell over, a meek "I'm okay." trailing into the air while some kids came running near him to retrieve the ball.
Sid turned back to Helga. "As I said, he can't make it."
Harold laughed. "I'm sure Helga has too many girly things to do, like paint her nails or read sappy romance novels," he cackled, wiggling his fingers. He loved to taunt Helga on occasion, like some small, infrequent hobby. Of course this was easy for him, considering he was four years older than the entire rest of the class.
She glared at him for a moment, and then turned back to the other two. "I'll think about it. Just don't get your hopes up." And with that, she strolled out.
They watched her go, and then Sid turned to Harold. "Maybe you shouldn't tease her so much, Harold."
He smirked, leaning into the shorter boy's face. "Why.do you like her?"
"No." Stinky answered for him. "It's just on account of that she scares us." Sid nodded in agreement.
The door clicked shut behind her and Helga came inside, calling out, "I'm home!" though she doubted anyone particularly cared. The place was quiet, the television barely audible from the front room. As Helga went up the stairs, she peered in to see Big Bob with his feet propped up, most likely waiting to see his new beeper commercial air. Miriam was asleep at his side, a sweatband still around her forehead from her earlier aerobic exercises.
Olga was nowhere in sight. Helga took the opportunity to disappear upstairs. As she came up to her bedroom door, she noted light streaming out from under Olga's door. "I guess she's home after all." she muttered to herself, striding into her own room with a soft snort.
To Helga, her room was like a safe-haven from the big, blowhard beeper salesmen, yoga fanatics, and actress wannabes that made up her family. No one, it seemed, was the picture of 'normal', Helga herself included. She shut the door quickly, and flipped the light switch. Bright, yellow light flooded the room as she briskly walked to the closet. One might wonder why she was headed to her closet in such a hurry, but it wasn't just any closet.
Opening the door, at first glance it did seem normal after all, packed with clothes of several shades, most of which were never worn. But Helga pushed it all aside, revealing a large walk-in space. Bookshelves were on both sides of the wall, filled with pink books. She sighed, and picked up a book near the bottom of a shelf on her right. Almost like choreography, she pulled out pen and opened the book to the first empty page. She reached into her shirt to pull out a golden locket with a photograph of a smiling boy inside; it was a few years old. Helga smiled back at a face she hadn't seen in so long.
She looked over the edge of it to a small clay statue with very similar features to the boy in the picture. He had a football-shaped head and flaxen hair that stuck up in opposite directions, though it was still quite neat. A single, small, blue cap sat just so between the locks of hair. She had molded and painted the statue herself. The entire back of the closet was adorned with items of his, including a framed set of his briefs.
Sighing softly, she thought back. Arnold had moved away nearly six years ago, not long after he had reunited with his parents.
Then they moved away.
This in mind, she clicked the back of the pen and the tip poked out. Then the purple pen danced across the page in rhyming motions she was so used to.
"My love was a crimson rose," She spoke as she wrote. My sweetest sorrow, my sunshine bright The morning dew, like well spent tears, Drops from so many of my empty years Lay down on him, reflecting the morning light All my dreams were for my crimson rose. How I wanted him to be forever! But not all dreams come true, Like my dreams of myself and you, The ones I now know, happening never. For the winter did oppose To our love; I thought it to never cease. The winter's winds did freeze My love, it brought me to my knees Then it stole away my crimson rose."
She paused, re-reading the last few lines, blinking. Grinning, she murmured, "Well, that's a keeper!"
Some time later, Helga left the sanctity of her room in curiosity of what dinner would be.
"Oh! Baby sister!" Olga chirped as Helga walked down the stairs. Helga noted that she lacked a bit of her usual perk, but she wasn't one to complain. Olga set plates down gently on the dinner table, setting four places for dinner. "Now Helga, be kind this evening. Mummy worked really hard over dinner."
"Miriam? Cook dinner?!" Helga asked as she came into the kitchen. "This I've got to see!" She pulled out a chair, spun it around, and sat backwards in it. She looked down at the plates, which to her surprise weren't plastic or Styrofoam. "Wait, like a REAL dinner?"
"She got it out of her new 'Health and Wellness' magazine."
Helga raised one half of her monobrow with disgust. "So is it safe to assume tofu?"
"Oh hush," her sister replied good-naturedly, "You just might like it." Olga sat across from her, the room falling silent. Even when Big Bob came in, no words were exchanged and Helga raised half of her brow in curiosity. Big Bob not saying something to his golden child.Olga, that is. It seemed as if all that night had been silent.
Miriam came in with the dinner, setting it down and taking her seat just as quietly as had the rest of the Pataki family.
She also noticed throughout the course of the next few minutes Miriam kept casting glances at Bob, which were returned with a disgruntled look. Olga on the other hand seemed either oblivious to the angered air, or was just keeping her distance from the subject. But this wasn't doing any good, so Helga decided to try and start up some conversation.
"So...get a part in any big plays yet Olga?" she started, but stopped when she heard a noise from Bob. Wrong choice of words.
"FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!" Big Bob shouted, slamming a hand on the table.
Miriam placed a hand on her husband's sleeve in a futile attempt to calm him. "B-now calm down.can't we just."
"You just HAD to bring it up didn't you little missy!" He accused pointing at Helga directly.
"What? All I was doing was trying to break the ice." she muttered and put her fork down and looked to Olga, who looked ready to cry as it was.
"Daddy, really...please. Don't do this at the dinner table."
It was too late, Big Bob started to rant about what had apparently been an earlier argument. "Acting, for Pete's sake! You have to do acting. First it's 'going to drop out of school and marry' Now this? Just how badly do you want to screw up your life huh?" Helga watched in dimmed amusement as the vein over his left eye started to throb.
"Olga, sweetie, please don't do this, acting.it.it's not a sure thing honey. It's not going to work, you're capable of so much more than that." Miriam chimed in putting her glass down.
"Of course...little miss perfect..." Helga muttered and ignored the icy look she received from Bob.
"Daddy, Mummy, I can do this. Really, I can! I've thought it through for a long time now.!"
"What? A few days?" Bob snorted.
"No, for a couple months now. I know of this production going on in a while, I can do this! Just give it a chance, please daddy? Please?"
"You're ruining your life Olga...don't do this." Miriam repeated.
"Oh get a new line, Mom." Helga muttered and was cut off by Bob.
"Hey, hey, hey! Either shut your mouth now, little missy, or get out of the room. Do you hear me?"
"Hey, don't yell at me, I'm the good child as of now." She shot back and folded her arms over her chest glaring at him and heard Olga sniffle slightly.
"I could just do as well as you do. I can do this! I could get my own place, I could.I could make a life for myself away from here! I really could!" Olga said as tears threatened to spill from her eyes.
Bob threw down his fork with a clatter but Helga was stuck on those last few words. "You know what Olga? I bet you could too. I mean, you're 27, smart, pretty. I'm very sure you could get yourself a great job as an actress, and a great place to live. Really show 'em what you're made of!!" Helga said with fake enthusiasm.
Great! A chance to get her out of the house, and out of my hair! She thought, smirking slightly.
"You think so baby sis?" came a very squeaky Olga who was already stifling a new flow of tears.
"Sure."
"GIVE IT UP WOULD YOU OLGA?! I WON'T HAVE ANY DAUGHTER OF MINE GOING OUT FOR SOMETHING AS...AS FOOLHEARTY AS ACTING!!!" He bellowed and knocked over his glass, sending it shattering to the ground. This caused Miriam to gasp, and Olga to let out a huge sob. She then ran from the room after crying out, "Why don't you understand? It's my dream daddy.my dream!"
Helga just looked after her silently then back to Bob who was glaring icy darts at her and Miriam who sitting down shaking her head. "Great."
Helga knocked on the door and gently turned the knob, revealing a sobbing Olga laying face down on her bed. "I don't understand how they can make you so upset," Helga sighed. "I mean, just look at yourself. Crying over a little argument. If I cried every time I fought with Bob, I would have had major wrinkles by the age of nine. If I were you, well first I'd wipe the mascara dripping down my face, but then I would move out. Immediately. I've never let Bob walk all over me like he did to you a while ago."
"Really?" Olga sniffed.
Helga snorted and said, "No! If he tells me I can't do something I want to do, then I do it anyway just to prove him wrong."
"But I'm not as strong as you baby sister," she said, wiping the tears from her eyes.
"True," Helga nodded, "but they'll love you no matter what you do. You're their pride and joy, their golden child! So stop being so darn sensitive and whiny and take control of your own life!"
Olga thought to herself, still sniffling a little, and then nodded too. "You know what? You're right. I can move out and I can be an actress. And sooner or later, they will come around."
"Why not get a head start and make it right now," Helga agreed eagerly. "Heck, I'll even help you pack!"
"Oh thank you so much Helga!" she squealed. "What would I do without you baby sister?" Olga flew off the bed with arms wide open and headed straight for Helga.
Frightened, Helga backed up until she was up against the door. "Uh, Olga, there's really no need for-" she was saying, but was crushed into a hug.
"And no matter what they think about me, I know you'll always be standing behind me."
"Right, uh yeah sure," she said quickly, attempting to escape the arms of her sister.
Olga let her go and walked over to her big dresser that contained all her clothes. Sighing with relief, Helga straightened out her shirt which Olga had wrinkled with the hug.
"I wonder what I'll need to take," she said and opened the doors. Olga stood with her hands on her hips, trying to decide. "Hmm."
Five minutes later.
"Olga!" Helga growled with impatience and shoved her out of the way. "Tell you what, you look for a place and I'll pack for you, okay??"
"Great plan baby sister!" she said with excitement. Olga picked up the newspaper laying on her nightstand and turned to the section with rooms for rent. While she was looking, she sat down on her bed and started humming to herself.
Helga popped her knuckles and started pulling random clothes from their hangers. The humming continued and Helga tried to ignore it, but it was getting louder by the minute. After Helga had pulled all of the clothes from the wardrobe, she folded them up and placed them on the bed next to Olga. Cringing from the high pitched hum, Helga bent down and pulled out two suitcases from under the bed.
"Hmm humm hmm huuummm!"
"Olga, could you please not do that!" Helga snapped.
"Oh I'm so sorry," she said. "I hum when I'm excited." Still smiling cheerfully, she went back to searching through the ads.
"Well it's annoying," Helga rolled her eyes, putting the folded clothes into one of the suitcases. Suddenly, it occurred to her that Olga was moving out. Out of the house, out of her hair, and out of her life. Well, not completely out of her life, but good enough. A smile spread across Helga's face and she herself started humming the same song that Olga had been. "I'll be back," Helga smiled cheerfully. "I've got to find some boxes to pack your other things."
Time passed as Olga idly flipped through the newspaper, calling a few places here and there. Finally, Olga gave an excited squeal, running from the room for the phone again. Helga rolled her eyes, half of Olga's more essential stuff packed up already.
While she was gone, Helga grabbed the radio and practically tore the plug out of the wall. Olga had been singing.or trying to sing, to most of the songs that had been played and she was sick of it.
Olga came back after a minute, clapping her hands. "Baby sister! Great news! I found a place and I can move in tomorrow!"
"That's great, Olga!" Helga said, more enthusiastic over the fact Olga was leaving then being enthusiastic with her.
Her older sister suddenly yanked her into a bear hug again and she stiffened. "Oh, baby sister! I'm going to miss you so much!"
Helga shoved her away. "Oh, for Pete's sake! I."
"Hey.what happened to my radio?"
Olga's periwinkle blue car with the tiny flowers printed on it pulled up on an old, familiar street. Helga darted her eyes about, praying Olga was just passing through. She held two boxes in her lap, and several stuffed boxes were in the back seat and trunk, barely tied down.
Adrenaline began to pump through her veins as Olga slowed.
Oh please, oh please not there.
Sure enough, Olga stopped. Helga hopped out of the car, leaving one of the boxes in the seat as she carried the other.
Helga stared up at the aged brick boarding house, reading the sign that said "Sunset Arms" as if it would miraculously change. She spun to her sister, her face ashen.
"Here, Olga?"
"It has a.chíc sort of early Industrial America look, doesn't it baby sister?"
"But.but Olga! It's old.and moldy.and falling apart! Can't you find a nicer place? You know anywhere but this place?"
"Oh, nonsense baby sister! It seems nice enough to me, just needs a little touching up here and there. Besides, the owner is letting me move in right away! They don't often do that, you know. Now, it's so sweet of you to care, but this place is just perfect!" She pinched her little sister's cheek, prancing up the steps, oblivious of her little sister's horror.
As Olga reached the door, Helga slid back into the car, hiding behind the boxes. She yanked out her locket and stared at the image of her beloved, Arnold, and his odd football-shaped head. "Oh, Arnold! Of all places, Olga had to pick here?!" She held the locket to her chest in worry. Arnold had once lived in that boarding house.and some time after he had moved, Helga had started to help out at the place. His grandparents took quite a liking to her.
Suddenly, a terrified thought came to mind.
What if.
Olga got Arnold's old room?
Helga's eyes widened. In her mind's eye, she saw Olga, bustling around a room, adding homey touches here and there. Olga removed an alarm clock from the nightstand and replaced it with a porcelain ballerina before flitting across the pink carpeting to place the clock in a cardboard box with other items she didn't have any use for. The clock, a homemade potato clock with a small Arnold figure on top, found its new home between a stack of Purdy Boys' mysteries and a pile of red plaid shirts. All lay near piles of things to be given to the poor and needy. Olga turned to what used to be a computer desk and adorned the surface with an array of doilies.
Ceramic knick-knacks and wicker baskets of various sizes filled the shelves. The walls were adorned with photos of Olga - Olga receiving her degree from Bennington College, Olga performing her role in the school production of "Rats," Olga on stage playing the piano. The room no longer resembled the boyhood haunt of Helga's lifelong obsession except for the elaborate stereo system against the wall.
Olga cocked her head to one side, evaluating the placement of the filmy curtains over the bookcase. Music from The Nutcracker Suite filtered through the speakers as she smoothed floral patterned sheets on the bed. She reached into her purse, pulled out a small picture frame engraved with "My Little Sis," and set it next to the ballerina.
Sunlight shone through the skylight, creating a halo around Olga's head as she clasped her hands together, squealing with delight as she surveyed the room.
Helga screamed.
Olga gently knocked on the old weathered door, leaving at her feet a simple suitcase packed sparsely with odd belongings. As she heard heavy footsteps approaching the door, she stepped back and prepared for the introductory encounter, picking up her suitcase and straightening her collar. Then, the door opened.
"Hey Miss, you're lucky I was nearby. You'll never get a rise outta nobody if you knock like that." Olga looked down to see Ernie Potts standing at the door, with a sledgehammer slung over his shoulder. "Now, if you would excuse me."
Olga, realizing that she was in Ernie's way, quickly stepped to the side to allow him passage. "Oh, I'm sorry about that sir, but would it be too much trouble to ask an itsy bitsy question before you get on your way?" Olga asked, before realizing what she said and covering her mouth. "Oh, I am so sorry."
Ernie chucked. "Heh, no offense taken, just as long as this question of yours is quick. I have to be at a very important demolition site in 10, and it'll take 15 by foot, so I gotta run," Ernie said, setting the sledgehammer on the ground while he waited.
Olga flinched as the sledgehammer came close to her as he lowered it. "Would you be able to point me in the direction of the landlord's offices? You see, I'm interested in renting a room after my parents suggested." Olga began, leaning against the doorframe on the porch of Sunset Arms.
"Hey, Miss, I have no time for life stories here," Ernie interrupted, waving his hand at Olga. "Anyway, the person you're lookin' for is Gramps.er, ol' Phil in there. And I don't think you want to meet with him in the bathroom, I'll tell you that much," Ernie chuckled, swinging his sledgehammer back over his shoulder and strolling off.
"Excuse me?" Olga responded, looking back into the house as she heard a toilet flush. She stepped inside to see Grandpa casually walking down the stairs. "Oh, hello, you must be the landlord," Olga said pleasantly, extending a hand to Grandpa.
Grandpa looked at Olga's hand before shaking it. "Dunno. It depends on who I'm talking to," Grandpa said, flatly. Olga drew her hand back in and looked at Grandpa dubiously. "You wouldn't happen to be from the department of mental health, would ya?" Grandpa asked, eyeing Olga sharply from the corner of his eye.
With this revelation, Olga laughed uncertainly. "Oh, of course not, sir. I'm Olga Pataki," she said, looking into Grandpa's eyes as if trying to help him along.
"Oh, so that's who you are! Olga Pataki, why yes.that name's not registering with me," Grandpa finally admitted.
Olga sighed, smiled absently, and explained, "The Olga Pataki who called concerning the room you had for rent."
Grandpa then snapped. "Oh, so you're interested in renting a room, eh?" Grandpa said, placing his hands behind his back. "Well, of course there's the necessary paperwork to be done concerning your rental, but first, it's imperative to go over the Sunset Arms rules," Grandpa said, pacing in the opening hallway of the house.
"Oh, but of course," Olga nodded, giggling nervously.
"Number one.no kids allowed. No kids, right?" Grandpa asked.
Olga relaxed a little, and began to giggle and shake her head. "No, of course not."
Grandpa nodded. "Didn't think so. Okay, now that we are over the rules, I guess I'll show you around the place, show you where things are, and.you are planning on actually renting, right? Not one of those pesky lookers that only look and then decide later?" Grandpa asked again, glaring at Olga critically.
"Well, sir, I think I made clear when I called you." Olga began, slightly on the defensive.
"A simple yes was all I needed," Grandpa said, passing through the hallway and stopping at the kitchen. Olga, still grasping her suitcase tightly in her hands, followed Grandpa, who was stepping quickly through the house. They reached the kitchen, where Mr. Hyunh and Oskar and Susie Kokoshka were sitting at the table, eating the lunch that Grandma had recently fixed. Although Oskar was in the company of his wife, upon the entrance of Olga to the kitchen he directed all of his attention. Mr. Hyunh also looked up from his plate, though slightly uninterested. "I suppose since we are on the ground level now, we can start from the bottom up," Grandpa continued in his tour.
Oskar nodded, as he stared at Olga. "Are we taking the pretty young lady on a tour, Grandpa, because I'd be glad to help, heh heh." he laughed, not noticing Susie taking offense at his admiration of Olga. "Oskar!" she exclaimed, glaring at him harshly.
"What?"
"So anyway," Grandpa continued, rolling his eyes at the couple, "this is the community kitchen. We serve all of our boarders three meals a day, as cooked by my wife over there," Grandpa guided flatly, as Grandma nodded from the other side of the kitchen where she was dressed as a Spanish Flamenco dancer.
"Olé!" she exclaimed, tossing her hand in the air. Olga, amused by Grandma's antics, smiled and waved at her.
"And, if you are so inclined, you may also used the kitchen to cook your own meals," Grandpa said, as he was prepared to continue throughout the boarding house.
Olga, however, continued through the kitchen, with her suitcase still in her hands, and glanced at the furnishing. "Would it be at all possible for me to take your wife's place sometimes and cook a few meals for the rest of the boarders?" Olga asked, as Grandma began to stomp her own version of the Flamenco out of the kitchen and into the hallway. "Because cooking is one of my absolute favorite things in the world, and I don't know what I'd do if I wasn't able to." Olga began, smiling dreamily as she looked into the cabinets.
Grandpa reentered the kitchen to see what Olga was talking about. "Well, I'll see if that can't be arranged.although I'd say it's the first time someone else has ever volunteered to cook," he shrugged.
Mr. Hyunh finally spoke up after remaining silent since Olga's entrance. "Well, I think it will be.an improvement! After so many years.of Grandma's cooking, I don't know how.much.more I can stand!" he exclaimed, finally getting up from the table after eating a heaping plate of whatever it was Grandma cooked for lunch.
After finishing his own lunch, Oskar made an observation. "Oh look, the pretty young lady is probably tired of carrying that suitcase all this time. Ms. Pretty Young Lady, can I carry this to your room for you? Hehehe," Oskar volunteered, bowing his head earnestly and chuckling.
Olga, truly flattered yet again, held her hand to her chest. "Why thank you, that's so kind and considerate of you," Olga said, giving her suitcase to Oskar.
Susie mumbled under her breath, "Yeah, he's considerate alright," before sitting back in her chair and sipping on a Yahoo.
Grandpa snapped as Oskar reminded him of something. "Oh yeah, now that you mention it Kokoshka, I forgot! Ms. Pataki, do you have any more belongings that need to be brought up to your room?" Grandpa asked.
Olga, who forgot herself, nodded. "Oh yes, I completely forgot! Oh, I'm such a silly! I have about two trunks and three more suitcases full of various necessities in my car parked out front," Olga remembered, looking towards the door of the boardinghouse.
"Well, Kokoshka, since you're already in the helping mood, I guess you and Hyunh here won't mind carrying the lady's things to her room," Grandpa volunteered them, as Mr. Hyunh sluggishly complied through groaning. Susie snickered as she watched Oskar sulk at the suggestion of more work.
Olga watched as the two men walked lethargically towards her car. "It's the baby blue car with the flowers painted on, you can't miss it!" she yelled as they walked out of the door.
Grandpa watched the two until they were both out of the door. "Well, Ms. Pataki, I suppose I'll be showing you around the rest of the premises now, unless by now you've changed your mind about this place," Grandpa said quickly and under his breath.
Olga followed Grandpa back into the hallway and up the stairs. "Oh, of course I haven't changed my mind, sir. I just love this place. Although the place is a little worn at the edges, its got definite potential," Olga said absently, as she smoothed her hands over the woodwork on the staircase. "It's got some type of eclectic flair to it that makes it worthy of the.antique feel," Olga analyzed.
Grandpa nodded. "Yeah, sure. So anyway, this is the community restroom." Grandpa began. But, before he could finish, he was again interrupted by one of the boarders, this time by Mr. Simmons, who was exiting the bathroom.
"Oh, excuse me, Phil, but I think the sink's encountered the same plumbing problem as it had before." he began, before he saw Olga. "Why, oh my! .Is that you, Olga Pataki?" he said, folding his arms and looking at Olga.
Olga nodded and smiled warmly. "And yes, you must be Mr. Simmons. Do you remember me, though it's been ages?"
"Of course I remember you!" Mr. Simmons exclaimed, as Grandpa rolled his eyes. "How could I forget, the award winning Olga Pataki," Simmons said. Grandpa cleared his throat impatiently as Mr. Simmons was prepared to go into a tangent. "Ah well, I guess we can catch up at dinner tonight. Will I see you then?"
Olga shrugged. "Yes, most likely. I look forward to speaking with you again, Mr. Simmons," she said politely as Mr. Simmons departed.
Grandpa looked at Olga for a while before he spoke again. "What is it about you, anyway, that gets people around here so stirred up. It's like you've got a people magnet on you or something.not saying that's necessarily a bad thing," Grandpa commented, once again contradicting himself. Olga giggled and Grandpa continued. "So, as I was saying, community bathroom. One shower, one toilet, one sink. This is the only public bathroom in the boardinghouse, contrary to popular belief," Grandpa whispered to Olga, who nodded in full belief of Grandpa's statement.
"Okay, and so continuing on, we're getting close to.aw, shoot! Forgot to show you the laundry room, didn't I?" Grandpa realized as he stopped in front of a room and unlocked the door. "Ah, well, we'll get to that later," he resolved as he pushed open the door to Olga's room.
"Oh, my." Olga began, as she walked into the room and looked around. She smiled, though the room was not much to smile at.
"Oh my what? Well, you're smiling, so I'll assume that was a good thing," Grandpa said, eyeing Olga. "Anyway, this is your room. As advertised, a flat rate and affordable. May not have all of the modern amenities, but enough so that you can live. One bedroom, a general room and a small kitchenette.ah, self furnished, of course," Grandpa said, as he dusted off the cabinet in the empty kitchen.
Olga nodded, enchanted somehow even in the dinginess of the room. "Oh, of course." she said, trailing off. She landed on an old dusty couch that was left in the room and rose thick dust all around her, causing her to cough.
"Now, if you wouldn't mind, Ms. Pataki, let's get all the paper work out of the way.my least favorite part of my job.besides being the landlord of a boardinghouse," Grandpa afforded, scratching the back of his head. Olga rose from the couch, dusted herself off as she followed Grandpa out of the door. As she did, she saw Oskar and Mr. Hyunh approaching the room, hefting one of her chests in. Helga was not far behind, sweating profusely even though she was carrying a solitary box.
As Olga and Grandpa went down the hallway, she beamed brightly, excited to finally be out on her own, more or less. "I think I'm going to like it here!" she exclaimed, clasping her hands together adoringly.
Grandpa chuckled at her before he continued on down the hallway. "Hehe.that's what you think," he said under his breath. As Olga passed by Mr. Smith's room, his camera followed her walking up the hall, and then refocused to get a full body view. She eyed it suspiciously as Grandpa continued to walk.
Helga strolled up the steps to the boarding house, her book bag bouncing on her back. It had been a few days since Olga moved in, and so far everything was going well, surprisingly enough. Big Bob and Miriam were the same as they always were, though a little miffed at Olga's "rebellion", Big Bob more so.
She opened the door and stepped aside to let a stampede of Gertie's animals rush by. Then she walked in. Phil was asleep in the den on the rocking chair. One could easily hear Susie and Oskar arguing up the stairs. Mr. Hyunh was singing in the shower as he prepared for work, his Vietnamese accent completely gone and replaced by a smooth, country-western sounding voice. Heaven only knew how that worked. Ernie would arrive soon. Mr. Smith dashed past her and out the door, barely tipping his hat in acknowledgement. Helga continued on into the kitchen where Gertie stirred a giant pot of a bubbling something. She wore dusty, dirty, worn clothes with buckles and shiny buttons. A musket, hopefully a toy one, was strapped to her back. A gunpowder horn hung at her waist, and a bag, probably full of metal pellets, tied beside it.
"Where's Olga?" Helga asked, dumping her book bag in a chair.
Gertie sipped at what was presumed to be soup. Setting the ladle back in, she turned to Helga. "Anne Marie and Robert are setting up traps on the upper floors." She grabbed the musket, her finger slipping over the trigger. "You never know which way those British mongrels will be coming from."
Helga stared at her momentarily, her brow up. Then she shrugged, grabbed her backpack, and made her way up the steps. Oskar came running down past her, but she ignored him. One of the doors lay open and Helga noted it was Olga's, so she peeked in.
Only to find Olga wearing an apron, tearing down wallpaper, and painting walls. Or, more accurately, Mr. Simmons was tearing the paper on one side and Olga was painting the other.
"Hi baby sister!" Olga squealed, putting the designer roller into the dip pan and dashed over to pinch Helga cheeks, leaving paint stains.
She swatted her away, trying to get a better look into the room. "What are you guys doing?"
Mr. Simmons finished peeling a strip, folding it and placing it onto a large piece of plastic. He clasped his hands together. "We're redecorating! Giving the room it's own 'special' touch." He unclasped his hands to make quotation marks in the air as he said "special".
Helga looked at them both. ".And Phil agreed to this?"
Olga giggled, tying an apron on Helga. "Of course Grandpa did, silly. He said we could redecorate this room as long as I paid for all the supplies."
"We'll be making Mr. Hyunh's apartment even more 'special' next!" Mr. Simmons said excitedly.
"Isn't this wonderful, Baby sister?" Olga made her way back to the dip pan, handing a detail brush to Helga so she could take care of corners.
Helga stared at it, and then sighed, dipping it into a giant mixed batch of golden yellow paint. "Great."
"Are you sure you want to make dinner for the army, Anne Marie?" Grandma asked. "So many mouths to feed, and one must feed them enough to keep them nourished for the battles ahead!" Olga noted the old lady's colonial style uniform with a bit of fear. She'd already realized the poor old woman wasn't all there mentally.
"Oh yes, Gertrude, I'll make enough, I swear." Olga smiled. The answer seemed to mollify Grandma, and she handed Olga a spatula.
"Your weapon, private! I'll see you at Sixteen Hundred hours!" Saluting, she marched out of the kitchen. Olga looked down at the utensil in her hands.
"Sixteen hundred hours? I don't imagine it will take that long!"
"How long can it take one chick to make a dinner? Sheesh!" Ernie Potts complained. "I mean, really, ya put a little meat in the oven, fix up some potatoes, bada boom, bada bang!" he clapped his hands.
"No, no, Olga's making a more sophisticated dish." Mr. Hyunh smiled, looking down at his empty plate with anticipation. "It should be very good!"
Grandma, still wearing her Colonial style outfit, was barking something about it being past sixteen hundred hours. Finally Olga emerged from the kitchen, carrying a big pot.
"I sure hope everyone's brought their appetites, because I've made plenty of food!" She grinned, obviously not knowing that there was flour stuck to her cheeks and all over her dress.
Oskar looked greedily at the large pot. "Heh heh, finally! The cranky old lady never cooks enough, and my poor stomach grumbles so loudly at night, it keeps Suzie awake!"
"Oh, keep quiet you big baby!" Grandpa muttered under his breath. Olga was just too excited to notice.
"Well, I've cooked a big pot of Bubble and Squeak..." she set it in the middle of the table, with a long ladle sticking out of it. She ran back into the kitchen, and then emerged again with a pan of pastries. "Crumpets... and." Once again, she disappeared into the kitchen after depositing the food on the table. "Lemon cake!" she held the large, golden cake in front of her with pride. "I hope you..." She was cut off.
"BRITISH SYMPATHIZER!!!!" Grandma yelled while knocking the cake off of its pan.
Olga gasped as the cake flew through the air.
Just then, Mr. Simmons decided to join them. "Hello everyone! What's for dinner to." and he was cut off as the cake hit him smack in the face.
Olga ran over in worry while the rest cackled. Grandma was cheering about Britain's defeat.
Ernie and Oskar waited outside of the bathroom as Mr. Hyunh took his sweet time inside. They both groaned, holding their stomachs. Susie suddenly came from her room to rejoin the line.
"I'm so sorry." Olga sniveled, her hands together as she spoke to them.
Ernie waved a hand. "We're just so used to Grandma's cooking yours was too fancy for our stomach."
"Oh dear.maybe tomorrow I should cook something a little less foreign?"
Oskar licked his lips. "I think I can take a little bathroom time for that again, heh heh." Then his stomach made a loud noise and he curled over again, holding it.
Olga placed a worried hand to her mouth.
Grandpa walked by with a laugh, patting his own abdomen and then Olga's back. "The best food I ever had! Not a single commode break in two hours!"
"Speak for yourself, Grandpa." Mr. Hyunh groaned as he opened the door.
While the others leaned away from the sudden smell, Olga pinching her nose, Oskar dashed in.
"Oskar!" Ernie cried, since he had been next in line. "You weasel!"
Grandpa strolled down the upstairs hall, carrying a glass of orange juice, humming to himself. Olga's food hadn't sent him to bathroom once, besides normal nature calling.
Hearing something, he looked into Ernie's room. "Holy peppers!" He yelped, dropping his glass.
Olga stood inside on a ladder, one hand to her cheek in concern. Ernie was at the bottom of the ladder, a paint can on his head and paint dripping around him.
And half his room was pink.
"You can say that again." Ernie groaned.
Olga sniffled. "I'm so sorry!"
Ernie waited outside of the bathroom impatiently, Mr. Hyunh and Oskar in line behind him.
"Man, how long does she have to be in there?" He crossed his arms and leaned against the wall.
"Yes, she always take too much time!" Mr. Hyunh huffed in his thick Vietnamese accent, both of his hands on his hips with towel gripped tightly in one.
"Too bad we can't get rid of her somehow." Ernie sighed.
Oskar, who had been oddly quiet, perked up. "What if we got that little ugly girl to talk her into moving?"
"Helga is a very nice girl." Mr. Hyunh scolded.
"Yeah, but she still has a hot temper and she's not too pretty with that one eyebrow of hers." Ernie snickered, gesturing to his own brow.
Mr. Hyunh and Oskar stared at him and his unibrow.
"What?" Asked the short man, pushing from the wall and holding his hands out in question.
Mr. Hyunh just continued. "Besides, she's probably very happy that that girl is out of her house."
Oskar grinned. "I bet you five dollars I can get Olga kicked out."
Ernie snorted. "If we can't get a weasel like you kicked out, or you haven't gotten yourself kicked out by now.how are you going to do it to her?"
"Are you in or not?"
Ernie went back to his previous position against the wall with his arms crossed. "Yeah, yeah. But when you lose, I want my five bucks and the ten you owed me from two weeks ago."
"I am staying out of this one." Mr. Hyunh sighed with his hands in the air.
"All right! Heh heh!" Oskar chuckled, rubbing his greedy hands together. "You better have your five bucks ready, Ernie. Don't you worry."
"I'll believe it when I see it you cheap-skate."
It was then Olga finally announced her leaving of the joint bathroom that all three men rushed to go in next, ignoring the line's waiting positions. Mr. Simmons came and calmly walked in while they didn't notice since they were busy bickering and scrambling.
Finally, Ernie turned as the door clicked shut. "Hey, who went in?"
"Please baby sister?" Came Olga's whiny voice over the phone. Helga sighed, sitting on her bed in her room while talking to Olga.
"Olga, I can't promise anything."
"Just try, Baby Sister. I want Mummy and Daddy to see how well I'm doing here!"
"I'll try." Helga sighed in aggravation, hanging up the phone from her extension in her bedroom. Olga was going to have a huge dinner at the boarding house the next day and Olga somehow managed to convince her to try and make their parents come.
She put her head in her hands. "I must be getting soft."
"OLGA!" Big Bob cried from downstairs.
She hopped off her bed, clenching her fists. "It's HELGA dad! HELGA!"
"I can't believe I let myself get dragged into eating dinner at this run down, old rickety place." Big Bob grunted, overlooking the aged building. They waited just outside for only a minute before Olga opened the door, smiling brightly.
"I'm so very glad you came to dinner! You're going to just love it! I'm afraid Mr. Simmons couldn't join us today, something about schoolwork." She explained and basically dragged Helga into the kitchen while Bob and Miriam followed silently. The usual round of greetings and introductions went around before everybody sat down at the table, which was elegantly set, wine glasses, special china, the works.
"So Olga, what new exciting dish are you going to be serving us today?" Susie asked and Oskar made a face and piped in.
"As long as it doesn't have any of that green stringy vegetable, you know, the one that smells like grandpa's socks. Eh heh heh heh"
"Oskar!" Susie admonished. "That meal was very good, and don't be such a baby, cabbage is a very good thing to eat."
"I was just telling the truth Susie." The two of them proceeded into a silent argument.
"Attention everybody! I've made this dinner in honor of the very kind people who allowed me to move in here and helped make my change to living on my own just as easy as could be." Olga said then disappeared behind a corner and brought a dish.
"What is that?" Helga asked in suspicion at the smell, the others were looking at it rather oddly as well.
"Champignons à l'Ail!" Was the reply and Helga made a face as her sister set something down that looked a lot like mushrooms and croissants.
"And that would make it look more appetizing...how?"
"It's Garlic mushrooms silly."
"Ooh well that makes a whole big world of difference." Came a dark retort.
"Next up-Champignons à la Grecque!" Helga heard and then saw Oskar make a face and concealed an agreeing snort of disapproval.
"Lovely, more mushrooms."
"Watch it little lady."
This comment she chose to ignore.
"And for dessert.Grand Tiramisu!" She said but sat down. "That can come later."
"What is Grand Tiramisu or whatever?" Helga asked skeptically.
Kind of a French cheese cake."
"Well why couldn't you have just said that?" Helga muttered and rolled her eyes, then picked at her food for a second as everybody, after eyeing the food in mild skepticism, finally started to eat.
After a while, probably the worst possible thing to happen, happened. "So..Old Timer, is this nuthouse worth letting my daughter stay here? I see she's done some changes, for the better of course-" Bob started in and Helga groaned.
"Daad.please-"
"Pipe down!"
"Of course this place is worth letting your daughter live here, it's a great place for her to stay warm atmosphere." At this Mr. Potts snorted into his drink and ignored a glare from Phil. "Good prices, the works! She even has her own room and everything." He added.
"Oh, yes daddy. It's great here, I just love it so much!" Olga chimed in and giggled.
"Oh, yeah, just grand." Potts added and Oskar laughed a little.
"She cooks so much, it's like a dream come true! Always room for seconds, or thirds even!"
He grinned and Susie gasped. "Oskar! Please!"
"Well it's true Susie" and again they fell into argument.
"However, some of the decorations I could definitely do without." Phil muttered.
"What was that?" Bob asked angrily when Olga went to grab the dessert.
"If I see one more frilly little antique critter around, I'll smash it." Potts muttered and Helga then snorted into her drink and had to stop herself from laughing.
"Who asked you loons to join in this conversation?!" Phil shot at them and then roughly forked Oskar's hand as he went for Olga's vulnerable meal. "Leave her stuff alone you no good for nothing cheating scum!"
Miriam exchanged glances with Arnold's grandma and Helga shook her head in disgust as Olga walked into the room with the dessert to find nearly everybody in the midst of an argument.
"Oh dear." Helga heard then had to stop herself from laughing outright when she caught wind of the exclusive argument that had broken out between Arnold's grandpa and her dad.
"Oh! Not that incident again! It was an accident for mercy's sake, the car damage was fixed and everything's just rosy now!" Was what she heard from Phil's side only to be countered by.
"You old bag of wrinkles, you'd just better be thankful you're so blasted lucky at Golf! You still should have paid for both yours and MY damage, twice! I should sue you for every penny you have.and it probably would only be pennies..." They were arguing about a time when the two cars had had a simple fender bender, which was followed by a golf contest to find out who would pay damage repair for both vehicles.
It looked like the food was going to start to fly, so all at once Helga, Miriam, Arnolds Grandma, and Olga backed up from the table and watched as the argument heated up to such a point.
"THAT'S IT! Come on Miriam, Helga, we're out of here!" Bob shouted.
Oskar let out a loud yell when a fork came in contact with his hand. "Keep your mitts off my food, Kokoshka!
"But Dad!" Helga protested.
"You can do whatever you want, we're out of here, come on Miriam." Bob ordered and stormed towards the exit muttering profusely to himself.
Helga snickered when a croissant bounced off his head and fell to the floor, almost immediately bringing an end to the dinner of disaster.
Oskar peeked into the den, Grandpa was sound asleep in his rocking chair, his head lolled on the back of the wooden frame. Snickering to himself, he snuck over and slipped his fingers between the wooden bars, pulling a ring of keys from Phil's pocket. Pausing when Grandpa muttered something about raspberries, and Oskar stiffened when Phil's head rolled towards him. Finally, letting out a breath, he snuck back out of the room.
Grandpa suddenly jolted up, looking around in confusion. "Eh, who's there?" He peered back and forth, shrugged, and fell right back to sleep. Oskar hid around the doorframe with the set of keys held tightly to his chest. He waited a minute, and then tiptoed up the stairs. "Heh heh, I'm going to get five bucks!"
Olga, almost as if it were a practiced ballet step, moved out of her room. To her surprise a set of stairs was pulled down from the ceiling to her left and Oskar was perched at the top, struggling with a set of keys. She walked up to the bottom step, watching him cheer as the final key clicked the lock open and he pulled it away, rubbing his hands together and chuckling. "What are you doing, Mr. Kokoshka?" She asked perkily.
He jumped, the keys flying down and then jingling as Olga caught them effortlessly, resting on a single foot and leaning into the air with her long, slender form. She moved back into a normal standing position, and looked at the ring. "Aren't these Phil's?" She asked sweetly, her face betraying no suspicion.
Oskar thought about it a moment. His plan had been a simple one: steal something from Arnold's room and blame it on Olga.then take it and sell it. Still.a new, better one came. "Yeah. Heh heh, Grandpa gave them to me. I was going to get it open for you." He said as he came down the stairs.
"For me?" She looked at the keys quizzically once more.
He nodded vigorously, beginning to sneak away down the hall. "Grandpa wanted you to redecorate up there. A new room for.uh.Grandma. Yeah, heh heh." And with that, he made a mad dash for his own room, slamming it shut behind him. Olga looked at the keys once more, then shrugged, and strolled up to look around. She smiled all the way as several plans came to her mind.
Helga wandered through the front door, lugging a paper bag full of the strangest groceries from the most far away stores in town. Olga had sent her out in search of exotic things for dinner and she was tired from the long trek. Kicking the boarding house door closed behind a stampede of Grandma's pets, she peered about. The place was oddly quiet for so late in the day without dinner being set yet.
Then she heard the toilet flush upstairs and decided, perhaps, it wasn't so strange after all. Smirking, she went into the den, setting the bag down, and went over to Phil. "Hey! Grandpa!" She shouted in his ear.
"What?! Who?! I didn't do it, it was Jimmy Kofka!" He yelled, snapping forward and nearly falling out of the chair. Helga cackled and he paused to glare at her, and then looked around. "What time is it?"
"A little late in the day. Surprised no one's complaining for dinner." She looked out into the hallway, hands on her hips. "Speaking of which, where is Olga? She usually practically pounces on me as soon as I open the door."
"Aw, that's sweet. Baby sister misses her great big hug from her older, award winning sister." Grandpa clasped his hands together, mocking her big sister's usual manner of speaking.
Helga stared at him for a moment, deciding to ignore his usual quirks, and went back to looking around. She picked the bag up and went to the kitchen. Ernie was just beginning to sit in the dining room, waiting at the table with an almost frightful expression as if he already knew what was for dinner. Grandpa, yawning, followed and Ernie blinked as they passed by.
"What are you doing down here, Gramps?" He asked, confused.
Grandpa blinked. "And just what is that supposed to mean?"
Ernie shrugged. "The stairs are pulled down that lead to Arnold's room and the door's open. I assumed you were up there."
There was a sudden rattling and a crash as Helga dropped something and poked her head out the kitchen doorway. "What?"
Grandpa scoffed. "I'm the only one with the key to that room and it's right here." He said, patting his pocket. He blinked, realizing he hadn't felt or heard anything. He patted it again, bewildered. Then he and Helga exchanged glances.
They both ran off like a single shot up the stairs.
Barreling down the hall and fighting to be the first up the steps, they barged in just as Olga began to peel a layer of wallpaper. Helga screamed at the top of her lungs in panic and Grandpa shouted, "Oh no!" He ran over with Helga right behind.
"What are you doing?" Helga gasped.
"Whatever do you mean, baby sister? I'm redecorating." Olga smiled brightly, pressing one hand to her cheek, the other clasping a tiny scraper. Only a small corner was peeled down, but both Helga and Grandpa stared at it in horror.
Grandpa stuttered for a moment and then managed to get the words out. "Wha.re.redecorating? No! Who told you to do that?" His hands held to his face.
"Well, Mr. Kokoshka said it was a surprise for-"
Grandpa interrupted her, "Oskar?! Ooohh, that weasel's going to get it this time!" He then rolled up a sleeve and shook his bony fist. Phil then promptly headed down the set of stairs and down the hall. "Oskar, I want to have a word with you." He called in false cheer.
Helga and Olga stared after him, and then Helga calmly walked over to her big sister, removing the scraper from her hand and leading her down the stairs. True, her sister drove her nuts, but the boarding house had been her one safe place from her family, the last piece of Arnold she had left. She'd rather the worst of it all be in one place rather than two. "Look, Olga, don't you think you've proved your point?"
"My point?" Olga asked innocently, watching as her younger sister flung the scraper into the air, it letting out a loud "thunk" sound as it dug into the wall, just missing Mr. Hyunh as he left his room, sipping a cup of coffee.
Helga set an arm around Olga's shoulders, pulling her closer to make sure she listened. "Yes. You wanted to prove you could make it on your own, and you did."
"But baby sister, I like it here! I can't just go back now!"
They stopped after they got off the bottom step, Oskar dashing from his room with Grandpa not far behind, hollering and waving his fists. "Yes, yes you can." She considered her words for a pause. "The house isn't the same without you." The words barely squeezed out, there was truth behind them and she hated every syllable that she was forced to say.
"That's so sweet baby sister! But-"
"Mom's been ignoring her aerobics.and Dad really misses you."
Olga thought about it a moment, one manicured fingernail held to her lips. ".Really?"
Helga nodded. "Oh yes. He hasn't said it out loud, but he talks about how much nicer the place had been, how quiet the house is."
Grandpa came trotting back up the steps, muttering under his breath about Oskar running outside. He then walked up to the girls as if he had just remembered something, which, he had. "You know, this reminds me of the time when my friend's older brother got in a fight with his parents. He was so mad, he moved out of the house with nothing more than his pride. And a ham sandwich."
"What happened," Olga asked breathlessly.
"Well, he was determined to show his parents that he could make it on his own, so he took a room right here in the boarding house. He didn't have any money, so he worked around the place to earn his keep. After he'd been here a while, he decided to invite his parents over to show them how well he was doing on his own."
"And I'll just bet they were so proud of him when they saw him!" Olga gushed.
"Well, no, but while he was arguing with his parents, he left his room unlocked."
"Where are you going with this?" Helga interjected.
"Aren't you listening? The ham sandwich! I finally had access to that ham sandwich!" Phil cackled gleefully.
Helga rolled her eyes and put her arm back around Olga's shoulders. "Listen, Olga, Mom and Dad really miss you. You're all they talk about at dinner." Olga didn't need to know exactly what direction those conversations tended to take.
Really?" Olga asked, a glimmer of hope in her eyes.
"Criminy! Why else do you think Big Bob got so upset?" Helga asked. Olga didn't notice Phil behind her, clenching his fists and mumbling about the 'big blowhard'.
"Do you really think so, Baby Sister?" Olga said, clasping one of Helga's hands in hers.
"Well, sure," she said, prying Olga's fingers from hers one by one.
"You're right," Olga cried happily. She turned to Phil, who looked like he'd been caught with his hands in the cookie jar. Oblivious, Olga ran over and embraced him.
"And I couldn't have done it without you," she said. "Thank you so much for being there for me and my baby sister. I just know that you've helped bring my family closer together."
Phil looked over Olga's head at Helga, who shrugged.
"Well, I'd better start packing right away," Olga said, wiping a tear from her eye. She then pranced off to her room to start packing.
Phil sighed as the door shut behind Olga. "I am going to miss that girl's cooking." And he then trudged off down the hall, holding his stomach, knowing what was going to come once Gertie started cooking again.
Helga shook her head at Phil, a half smile on her face. She looked down the hall, watching Mr. Hyunh go into the joint bathroom. Ernie was downstairs, Grandpa heading there, and Oskar was outside. Mr. Simmons was nowhere to be seen.
Helga looked left, and then right.
Then she sneaked up the steps, going into Arnold's room and softly closing the door behind her. She tiptoed over to his old bed, sitting gently as if it would break at any moment. She ran her hands over the old sheets. Not a speck of dust dare tarnish such a place, as Grandma, or Helga, kept the room spick and span.
She sighed softly, falling onto her side and burying her face into the pillow and inhaling deeply. That old familiar scent remained within the folds of cotton, but just barely. "How I miss the smell of your hair.I never did figure out what shampoo you used." She swooned, hugging the pillow a few moments.
Hearing a small sound, her eyes snapped open to see Grandpa peeking in with eyebrows raised. He blinked once, and then twice before Helga sat straight up, setting the pillow back in place. Then she smoothed the sheets and laughed sheepishly.
Grandpa stared for an instant, and in one swift motion, a jingling blur flew at her and she caught it on reflex. It was Grandpa's set of keys. "I'll let you lock up." He said, turning and closing the door with a knowing, small smile.
Grandpa closed the door and made his way down the steps, shaking his head. "She's crazier than Pookie."
Helga stared after him, and then at the ring of keys in her hand.
Grinning, she pulled a free key from her pocket. Grandpa wasn't the only one with a key.
"Welcome home darling," Miriam said as soon as Olga was through the door. "We've missed you so much."
After sharing a brief embrace with her, Olga asked, "Where's Daddy?"
"He's in there watching TV," Miriam pointed.
Olga walked into the living room, holding her suitcases with both hands. Bob was sitting in his recliner, watching TV as usual. He didn't acknowledge her presence at all.
"Daddy?" Olga managed to chirp out.
He turned his head slightly, but then returned it to the screen. "Oh... you're back," Bob said as nonchalantly as he could make it.
"Yes," she nodded. "I didn't realize how much you wanted me back in the house."
"Yeah, me either," he said, lifting the remote and flipping through the channels rapidly. "But I'm glad you're back... nobody makes a cup of coffee like my little Olga does."
"Oh Daddy!" she cried out happily, dropping her suitcases with a loud thud and running over to him. Olga wrapped him into a hug, but Bob only patted her arm.
"Well isn't this great?" Miriam smiled, joining in the hug. "We're a family again!"
"Oh gag me," Helga scowled, watching from the stairs.
"Come on Mummy, I'll make you a nice smoothie," Olga said smiling.
"Oh no honey, I'm fine. Really," Miriam replied, shaking her head.
"Nonsense," she said. "I'll even put in extra strawberries, just like you like it."
Miriam hesitated, but eventually gave in. "Well if you insist..."
"Perfect!" Olga said and clasped her hands. "You get the Tabasco sauce and I'll get the blender!"
Helga watched as her mother and sister disappeared into the kitchen. She then looked at her father, who was still busy flipping through the channels. She sighed and left the stairs, walking toward the recliner.
"So..." she said slowly. "Everything's okay? You're going to let Olga pursue her new career while she stays with us?"
"Of course not," he said, eyes still glued to the TV. "But we'll just sweep this under the rug for now. Olga will forget all about acting and things will return to normal, you'll see. Big Bob is still king of his castle, master of his domain, and nothing is going to change that."
Helga ignored the sounds coming from downstairs as her parents and Olga talked and laughed. Sighing, she pulled a fresh piece of paper from her backpack.
"Dear Arnold," She started, talking out loud as she went along. "Your room is safe yet again, I stopped the horrible Olga from doing anything to it. I can't say I'm happy to have her home," She paused, hearing Bob's roaring laughter. Somewhere down inside, it hurt. They were never so happy about her. She shook her head. It didn't matter anyway.
"But I'm glad she's not at the boarding house anymore. I need someplace to get away from them all.
Grandpa misses Olga's cooking, and Grandma's convinced Olga was a spy for Russia. Other than that, all is back to normal. What's considered normal around here, anyway.
See, everything worked out even without you, hair boy.
I played baseball with the guys after all. My team won. We were up against the Juniors at our high school, Bartlett High. Wolfgang still tries to beat us.
We could have used you for a short stop, though.
Even if you don't hit well, whenever you do, you usually smack someone. Too bad you couldn't wallop that moron, Wolfgang, one.
Well, I'll see you around, football-head.
Helga Pataki
P.S. Okay, maybe I miss you a little. I need someone to throw my spitballs at."
Written By: Old Betsy
Edited By: The Five Avengers
Directed By: Nicole K.
Produced By: Nicole K.
Based on characters created by Craig Bartlett
Most characters are privately owned by such parties as Nickelodeon, Viacom, etc. and are used without permission, but not without respect.
It's been a while since I saw you and your stupid football-shaped head last. Can't say I miss it too much, but all the kids here could still sure use your goody-goody advice. Heck, you might even say I wouldn't mind it anymore. Don't get any big ideas, bucko.
Big Bob and Miriam still argue about Olga's 'new' career choice. I told you about that before, right? She wants to be a Broadway actress now. So much for teaching, huh? Sure, she hasn't landed any parts, probably irritates all the directors. HAH!
And don't start going on about how special sibling relationships are supposed to be either. You."
Helga paused in writing her letter as soon as the loud bell rang, marking the ending of the day's final period. She had English Literature for her last period this year as a sophomore, and the teacher had given them ten minutes to work on their homework since the day's lesson plan had finished sooner than expected. Helga doubted any of them were actually doing the homework.well, besides her long time best friend, Phoebe. She only stared momentarily at the shrilling bell with one half of her unibrow raised, and then began to collect her things after it finished. Most of the students were leaving the room by the time she stood, prattling away about weekend plans. It was a Friday.
"Do you have any plans scheduled for this weekend, Helga?" Phoebe asked, her face the usual pleasant expression.
Helga's was the opposite and she snorted softly. "Yeah, see how many times I can snatch the TV remote from Big Bob, avoid Miriam, and ignore Olga." Helga was prone to call her parents by their first names.she never considered them much of parents at all.
They continued chatting as they strolled into the hallway, pressing through the throng of excited students rushing to leave as soon as possible. "Well, I've heard of an exceedingly invigorating and educational cinematic thriller about."
"No thanks, Pheebs. I'm not in the mood for movies this week." She sighed, strolling down the curving steps of the old, musty high school.
Phoebe hugged her books to her chest, wishing her friend would be more social. "I'll call you later in the evening, is that all right?"
"Sounds good. Bye, Pheebs." With that, she turned to her locker, spinning the combination and grabbing her things to pack up. Phoebe stood there momentarily, wondering if she should try and suggest Helga come out this weekend. Still she knew it was futile at this point in time and started off down the thinning out hallways to her own locker by the computer room. Specially requested, of course.
Helga finished putting her few books away for the homework she hadn't done in study hall when Stinky, Sid, and Harold came by. "Hey, Helga." Harold said in a singsong voice purposely used to taunt her.
"What is it, pink boy?" She snapped, slinging the bag over her shoulder and spinning to face him. She called him that since his skin seemed more tinged pink than most. He was overweight, though muscled, with a wide nose to match his belly.
Stinky stepped in before the conversation turned into a growling match, towering over the two with his height, as thin as a pencil. "We just wanted to ask if you were gonna join the stickball game come Sunday on account of you usually do." He drawled in his thick southern accent.
"Yeah." Sid added on, jutting his thumb over his shoulder at an approaching figure. "Seeing as Eugene's out since he kind of broke his leg after that incident with the Jolly Olly Man after the football game last week."
Eugene hobbled by on his crutch saying a chipper, "I'm okay! Really, guys! I'm sure I can still make it," only to be accidentally smacked in the head by a wayward football someone was tossing in the hallway. He fell over, a meek "I'm okay." trailing into the air while some kids came running near him to retrieve the ball.
Sid turned back to Helga. "As I said, he can't make it."
Harold laughed. "I'm sure Helga has too many girly things to do, like paint her nails or read sappy romance novels," he cackled, wiggling his fingers. He loved to taunt Helga on occasion, like some small, infrequent hobby. Of course this was easy for him, considering he was four years older than the entire rest of the class.
She glared at him for a moment, and then turned back to the other two. "I'll think about it. Just don't get your hopes up." And with that, she strolled out.
They watched her go, and then Sid turned to Harold. "Maybe you shouldn't tease her so much, Harold."
He smirked, leaning into the shorter boy's face. "Why.do you like her?"
"No." Stinky answered for him. "It's just on account of that she scares us." Sid nodded in agreement.
The door clicked shut behind her and Helga came inside, calling out, "I'm home!" though she doubted anyone particularly cared. The place was quiet, the television barely audible from the front room. As Helga went up the stairs, she peered in to see Big Bob with his feet propped up, most likely waiting to see his new beeper commercial air. Miriam was asleep at his side, a sweatband still around her forehead from her earlier aerobic exercises.
Olga was nowhere in sight. Helga took the opportunity to disappear upstairs. As she came up to her bedroom door, she noted light streaming out from under Olga's door. "I guess she's home after all." she muttered to herself, striding into her own room with a soft snort.
To Helga, her room was like a safe-haven from the big, blowhard beeper salesmen, yoga fanatics, and actress wannabes that made up her family. No one, it seemed, was the picture of 'normal', Helga herself included. She shut the door quickly, and flipped the light switch. Bright, yellow light flooded the room as she briskly walked to the closet. One might wonder why she was headed to her closet in such a hurry, but it wasn't just any closet.
Opening the door, at first glance it did seem normal after all, packed with clothes of several shades, most of which were never worn. But Helga pushed it all aside, revealing a large walk-in space. Bookshelves were on both sides of the wall, filled with pink books. She sighed, and picked up a book near the bottom of a shelf on her right. Almost like choreography, she pulled out pen and opened the book to the first empty page. She reached into her shirt to pull out a golden locket with a photograph of a smiling boy inside; it was a few years old. Helga smiled back at a face she hadn't seen in so long.
She looked over the edge of it to a small clay statue with very similar features to the boy in the picture. He had a football-shaped head and flaxen hair that stuck up in opposite directions, though it was still quite neat. A single, small, blue cap sat just so between the locks of hair. She had molded and painted the statue herself. The entire back of the closet was adorned with items of his, including a framed set of his briefs.
Sighing softly, she thought back. Arnold had moved away nearly six years ago, not long after he had reunited with his parents.
Then they moved away.
This in mind, she clicked the back of the pen and the tip poked out. Then the purple pen danced across the page in rhyming motions she was so used to.
"My love was a crimson rose," She spoke as she wrote. My sweetest sorrow, my sunshine bright The morning dew, like well spent tears, Drops from so many of my empty years Lay down on him, reflecting the morning light All my dreams were for my crimson rose. How I wanted him to be forever! But not all dreams come true, Like my dreams of myself and you, The ones I now know, happening never. For the winter did oppose To our love; I thought it to never cease. The winter's winds did freeze My love, it brought me to my knees Then it stole away my crimson rose."
She paused, re-reading the last few lines, blinking. Grinning, she murmured, "Well, that's a keeper!"
Some time later, Helga left the sanctity of her room in curiosity of what dinner would be.
"Oh! Baby sister!" Olga chirped as Helga walked down the stairs. Helga noted that she lacked a bit of her usual perk, but she wasn't one to complain. Olga set plates down gently on the dinner table, setting four places for dinner. "Now Helga, be kind this evening. Mummy worked really hard over dinner."
"Miriam? Cook dinner?!" Helga asked as she came into the kitchen. "This I've got to see!" She pulled out a chair, spun it around, and sat backwards in it. She looked down at the plates, which to her surprise weren't plastic or Styrofoam. "Wait, like a REAL dinner?"
"She got it out of her new 'Health and Wellness' magazine."
Helga raised one half of her monobrow with disgust. "So is it safe to assume tofu?"
"Oh hush," her sister replied good-naturedly, "You just might like it." Olga sat across from her, the room falling silent. Even when Big Bob came in, no words were exchanged and Helga raised half of her brow in curiosity. Big Bob not saying something to his golden child.Olga, that is. It seemed as if all that night had been silent.
Miriam came in with the dinner, setting it down and taking her seat just as quietly as had the rest of the Pataki family.
She also noticed throughout the course of the next few minutes Miriam kept casting glances at Bob, which were returned with a disgruntled look. Olga on the other hand seemed either oblivious to the angered air, or was just keeping her distance from the subject. But this wasn't doing any good, so Helga decided to try and start up some conversation.
"So...get a part in any big plays yet Olga?" she started, but stopped when she heard a noise from Bob. Wrong choice of words.
"FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!" Big Bob shouted, slamming a hand on the table.
Miriam placed a hand on her husband's sleeve in a futile attempt to calm him. "B-now calm down.can't we just."
"You just HAD to bring it up didn't you little missy!" He accused pointing at Helga directly.
"What? All I was doing was trying to break the ice." she muttered and put her fork down and looked to Olga, who looked ready to cry as it was.
"Daddy, really...please. Don't do this at the dinner table."
It was too late, Big Bob started to rant about what had apparently been an earlier argument. "Acting, for Pete's sake! You have to do acting. First it's 'going to drop out of school and marry' Now this? Just how badly do you want to screw up your life huh?" Helga watched in dimmed amusement as the vein over his left eye started to throb.
"Olga, sweetie, please don't do this, acting.it.it's not a sure thing honey. It's not going to work, you're capable of so much more than that." Miriam chimed in putting her glass down.
"Of course...little miss perfect..." Helga muttered and ignored the icy look she received from Bob.
"Daddy, Mummy, I can do this. Really, I can! I've thought it through for a long time now.!"
"What? A few days?" Bob snorted.
"No, for a couple months now. I know of this production going on in a while, I can do this! Just give it a chance, please daddy? Please?"
"You're ruining your life Olga...don't do this." Miriam repeated.
"Oh get a new line, Mom." Helga muttered and was cut off by Bob.
"Hey, hey, hey! Either shut your mouth now, little missy, or get out of the room. Do you hear me?"
"Hey, don't yell at me, I'm the good child as of now." She shot back and folded her arms over her chest glaring at him and heard Olga sniffle slightly.
"I could just do as well as you do. I can do this! I could get my own place, I could.I could make a life for myself away from here! I really could!" Olga said as tears threatened to spill from her eyes.
Bob threw down his fork with a clatter but Helga was stuck on those last few words. "You know what Olga? I bet you could too. I mean, you're 27, smart, pretty. I'm very sure you could get yourself a great job as an actress, and a great place to live. Really show 'em what you're made of!!" Helga said with fake enthusiasm.
Great! A chance to get her out of the house, and out of my hair! She thought, smirking slightly.
"You think so baby sis?" came a very squeaky Olga who was already stifling a new flow of tears.
"Sure."
"GIVE IT UP WOULD YOU OLGA?! I WON'T HAVE ANY DAUGHTER OF MINE GOING OUT FOR SOMETHING AS...AS FOOLHEARTY AS ACTING!!!" He bellowed and knocked over his glass, sending it shattering to the ground. This caused Miriam to gasp, and Olga to let out a huge sob. She then ran from the room after crying out, "Why don't you understand? It's my dream daddy.my dream!"
Helga just looked after her silently then back to Bob who was glaring icy darts at her and Miriam who sitting down shaking her head. "Great."
Helga knocked on the door and gently turned the knob, revealing a sobbing Olga laying face down on her bed. "I don't understand how they can make you so upset," Helga sighed. "I mean, just look at yourself. Crying over a little argument. If I cried every time I fought with Bob, I would have had major wrinkles by the age of nine. If I were you, well first I'd wipe the mascara dripping down my face, but then I would move out. Immediately. I've never let Bob walk all over me like he did to you a while ago."
"Really?" Olga sniffed.
Helga snorted and said, "No! If he tells me I can't do something I want to do, then I do it anyway just to prove him wrong."
"But I'm not as strong as you baby sister," she said, wiping the tears from her eyes.
"True," Helga nodded, "but they'll love you no matter what you do. You're their pride and joy, their golden child! So stop being so darn sensitive and whiny and take control of your own life!"
Olga thought to herself, still sniffling a little, and then nodded too. "You know what? You're right. I can move out and I can be an actress. And sooner or later, they will come around."
"Why not get a head start and make it right now," Helga agreed eagerly. "Heck, I'll even help you pack!"
"Oh thank you so much Helga!" she squealed. "What would I do without you baby sister?" Olga flew off the bed with arms wide open and headed straight for Helga.
Frightened, Helga backed up until she was up against the door. "Uh, Olga, there's really no need for-" she was saying, but was crushed into a hug.
"And no matter what they think about me, I know you'll always be standing behind me."
"Right, uh yeah sure," she said quickly, attempting to escape the arms of her sister.
Olga let her go and walked over to her big dresser that contained all her clothes. Sighing with relief, Helga straightened out her shirt which Olga had wrinkled with the hug.
"I wonder what I'll need to take," she said and opened the doors. Olga stood with her hands on her hips, trying to decide. "Hmm."
Five minutes later.
"Olga!" Helga growled with impatience and shoved her out of the way. "Tell you what, you look for a place and I'll pack for you, okay??"
"Great plan baby sister!" she said with excitement. Olga picked up the newspaper laying on her nightstand and turned to the section with rooms for rent. While she was looking, she sat down on her bed and started humming to herself.
Helga popped her knuckles and started pulling random clothes from their hangers. The humming continued and Helga tried to ignore it, but it was getting louder by the minute. After Helga had pulled all of the clothes from the wardrobe, she folded them up and placed them on the bed next to Olga. Cringing from the high pitched hum, Helga bent down and pulled out two suitcases from under the bed.
"Hmm humm hmm huuummm!"
"Olga, could you please not do that!" Helga snapped.
"Oh I'm so sorry," she said. "I hum when I'm excited." Still smiling cheerfully, she went back to searching through the ads.
"Well it's annoying," Helga rolled her eyes, putting the folded clothes into one of the suitcases. Suddenly, it occurred to her that Olga was moving out. Out of the house, out of her hair, and out of her life. Well, not completely out of her life, but good enough. A smile spread across Helga's face and she herself started humming the same song that Olga had been. "I'll be back," Helga smiled cheerfully. "I've got to find some boxes to pack your other things."
Time passed as Olga idly flipped through the newspaper, calling a few places here and there. Finally, Olga gave an excited squeal, running from the room for the phone again. Helga rolled her eyes, half of Olga's more essential stuff packed up already.
While she was gone, Helga grabbed the radio and practically tore the plug out of the wall. Olga had been singing.or trying to sing, to most of the songs that had been played and she was sick of it.
Olga came back after a minute, clapping her hands. "Baby sister! Great news! I found a place and I can move in tomorrow!"
"That's great, Olga!" Helga said, more enthusiastic over the fact Olga was leaving then being enthusiastic with her.
Her older sister suddenly yanked her into a bear hug again and she stiffened. "Oh, baby sister! I'm going to miss you so much!"
Helga shoved her away. "Oh, for Pete's sake! I."
"Hey.what happened to my radio?"
Olga's periwinkle blue car with the tiny flowers printed on it pulled up on an old, familiar street. Helga darted her eyes about, praying Olga was just passing through. She held two boxes in her lap, and several stuffed boxes were in the back seat and trunk, barely tied down.
Adrenaline began to pump through her veins as Olga slowed.
Oh please, oh please not there.
Sure enough, Olga stopped. Helga hopped out of the car, leaving one of the boxes in the seat as she carried the other.
Helga stared up at the aged brick boarding house, reading the sign that said "Sunset Arms" as if it would miraculously change. She spun to her sister, her face ashen.
"Here, Olga?"
"It has a.chíc sort of early Industrial America look, doesn't it baby sister?"
"But.but Olga! It's old.and moldy.and falling apart! Can't you find a nicer place? You know anywhere but this place?"
"Oh, nonsense baby sister! It seems nice enough to me, just needs a little touching up here and there. Besides, the owner is letting me move in right away! They don't often do that, you know. Now, it's so sweet of you to care, but this place is just perfect!" She pinched her little sister's cheek, prancing up the steps, oblivious of her little sister's horror.
As Olga reached the door, Helga slid back into the car, hiding behind the boxes. She yanked out her locket and stared at the image of her beloved, Arnold, and his odd football-shaped head. "Oh, Arnold! Of all places, Olga had to pick here?!" She held the locket to her chest in worry. Arnold had once lived in that boarding house.and some time after he had moved, Helga had started to help out at the place. His grandparents took quite a liking to her.
Suddenly, a terrified thought came to mind.
What if.
Olga got Arnold's old room?
Helga's eyes widened. In her mind's eye, she saw Olga, bustling around a room, adding homey touches here and there. Olga removed an alarm clock from the nightstand and replaced it with a porcelain ballerina before flitting across the pink carpeting to place the clock in a cardboard box with other items she didn't have any use for. The clock, a homemade potato clock with a small Arnold figure on top, found its new home between a stack of Purdy Boys' mysteries and a pile of red plaid shirts. All lay near piles of things to be given to the poor and needy. Olga turned to what used to be a computer desk and adorned the surface with an array of doilies.
Ceramic knick-knacks and wicker baskets of various sizes filled the shelves. The walls were adorned with photos of Olga - Olga receiving her degree from Bennington College, Olga performing her role in the school production of "Rats," Olga on stage playing the piano. The room no longer resembled the boyhood haunt of Helga's lifelong obsession except for the elaborate stereo system against the wall.
Olga cocked her head to one side, evaluating the placement of the filmy curtains over the bookcase. Music from The Nutcracker Suite filtered through the speakers as she smoothed floral patterned sheets on the bed. She reached into her purse, pulled out a small picture frame engraved with "My Little Sis," and set it next to the ballerina.
Sunlight shone through the skylight, creating a halo around Olga's head as she clasped her hands together, squealing with delight as she surveyed the room.
Helga screamed.
Olga gently knocked on the old weathered door, leaving at her feet a simple suitcase packed sparsely with odd belongings. As she heard heavy footsteps approaching the door, she stepped back and prepared for the introductory encounter, picking up her suitcase and straightening her collar. Then, the door opened.
"Hey Miss, you're lucky I was nearby. You'll never get a rise outta nobody if you knock like that." Olga looked down to see Ernie Potts standing at the door, with a sledgehammer slung over his shoulder. "Now, if you would excuse me."
Olga, realizing that she was in Ernie's way, quickly stepped to the side to allow him passage. "Oh, I'm sorry about that sir, but would it be too much trouble to ask an itsy bitsy question before you get on your way?" Olga asked, before realizing what she said and covering her mouth. "Oh, I am so sorry."
Ernie chucked. "Heh, no offense taken, just as long as this question of yours is quick. I have to be at a very important demolition site in 10, and it'll take 15 by foot, so I gotta run," Ernie said, setting the sledgehammer on the ground while he waited.
Olga flinched as the sledgehammer came close to her as he lowered it. "Would you be able to point me in the direction of the landlord's offices? You see, I'm interested in renting a room after my parents suggested." Olga began, leaning against the doorframe on the porch of Sunset Arms.
"Hey, Miss, I have no time for life stories here," Ernie interrupted, waving his hand at Olga. "Anyway, the person you're lookin' for is Gramps.er, ol' Phil in there. And I don't think you want to meet with him in the bathroom, I'll tell you that much," Ernie chuckled, swinging his sledgehammer back over his shoulder and strolling off.
"Excuse me?" Olga responded, looking back into the house as she heard a toilet flush. She stepped inside to see Grandpa casually walking down the stairs. "Oh, hello, you must be the landlord," Olga said pleasantly, extending a hand to Grandpa.
Grandpa looked at Olga's hand before shaking it. "Dunno. It depends on who I'm talking to," Grandpa said, flatly. Olga drew her hand back in and looked at Grandpa dubiously. "You wouldn't happen to be from the department of mental health, would ya?" Grandpa asked, eyeing Olga sharply from the corner of his eye.
With this revelation, Olga laughed uncertainly. "Oh, of course not, sir. I'm Olga Pataki," she said, looking into Grandpa's eyes as if trying to help him along.
"Oh, so that's who you are! Olga Pataki, why yes.that name's not registering with me," Grandpa finally admitted.
Olga sighed, smiled absently, and explained, "The Olga Pataki who called concerning the room you had for rent."
Grandpa then snapped. "Oh, so you're interested in renting a room, eh?" Grandpa said, placing his hands behind his back. "Well, of course there's the necessary paperwork to be done concerning your rental, but first, it's imperative to go over the Sunset Arms rules," Grandpa said, pacing in the opening hallway of the house.
"Oh, but of course," Olga nodded, giggling nervously.
"Number one.no kids allowed. No kids, right?" Grandpa asked.
Olga relaxed a little, and began to giggle and shake her head. "No, of course not."
Grandpa nodded. "Didn't think so. Okay, now that we are over the rules, I guess I'll show you around the place, show you where things are, and.you are planning on actually renting, right? Not one of those pesky lookers that only look and then decide later?" Grandpa asked again, glaring at Olga critically.
"Well, sir, I think I made clear when I called you." Olga began, slightly on the defensive.
"A simple yes was all I needed," Grandpa said, passing through the hallway and stopping at the kitchen. Olga, still grasping her suitcase tightly in her hands, followed Grandpa, who was stepping quickly through the house. They reached the kitchen, where Mr. Hyunh and Oskar and Susie Kokoshka were sitting at the table, eating the lunch that Grandma had recently fixed. Although Oskar was in the company of his wife, upon the entrance of Olga to the kitchen he directed all of his attention. Mr. Hyunh also looked up from his plate, though slightly uninterested. "I suppose since we are on the ground level now, we can start from the bottom up," Grandpa continued in his tour.
Oskar nodded, as he stared at Olga. "Are we taking the pretty young lady on a tour, Grandpa, because I'd be glad to help, heh heh." he laughed, not noticing Susie taking offense at his admiration of Olga. "Oskar!" she exclaimed, glaring at him harshly.
"What?"
"So anyway," Grandpa continued, rolling his eyes at the couple, "this is the community kitchen. We serve all of our boarders three meals a day, as cooked by my wife over there," Grandpa guided flatly, as Grandma nodded from the other side of the kitchen where she was dressed as a Spanish Flamenco dancer.
"Olé!" she exclaimed, tossing her hand in the air. Olga, amused by Grandma's antics, smiled and waved at her.
"And, if you are so inclined, you may also used the kitchen to cook your own meals," Grandpa said, as he was prepared to continue throughout the boarding house.
Olga, however, continued through the kitchen, with her suitcase still in her hands, and glanced at the furnishing. "Would it be at all possible for me to take your wife's place sometimes and cook a few meals for the rest of the boarders?" Olga asked, as Grandma began to stomp her own version of the Flamenco out of the kitchen and into the hallway. "Because cooking is one of my absolute favorite things in the world, and I don't know what I'd do if I wasn't able to." Olga began, smiling dreamily as she looked into the cabinets.
Grandpa reentered the kitchen to see what Olga was talking about. "Well, I'll see if that can't be arranged.although I'd say it's the first time someone else has ever volunteered to cook," he shrugged.
Mr. Hyunh finally spoke up after remaining silent since Olga's entrance. "Well, I think it will be.an improvement! After so many years.of Grandma's cooking, I don't know how.much.more I can stand!" he exclaimed, finally getting up from the table after eating a heaping plate of whatever it was Grandma cooked for lunch.
After finishing his own lunch, Oskar made an observation. "Oh look, the pretty young lady is probably tired of carrying that suitcase all this time. Ms. Pretty Young Lady, can I carry this to your room for you? Hehehe," Oskar volunteered, bowing his head earnestly and chuckling.
Olga, truly flattered yet again, held her hand to her chest. "Why thank you, that's so kind and considerate of you," Olga said, giving her suitcase to Oskar.
Susie mumbled under her breath, "Yeah, he's considerate alright," before sitting back in her chair and sipping on a Yahoo.
Grandpa snapped as Oskar reminded him of something. "Oh yeah, now that you mention it Kokoshka, I forgot! Ms. Pataki, do you have any more belongings that need to be brought up to your room?" Grandpa asked.
Olga, who forgot herself, nodded. "Oh yes, I completely forgot! Oh, I'm such a silly! I have about two trunks and three more suitcases full of various necessities in my car parked out front," Olga remembered, looking towards the door of the boardinghouse.
"Well, Kokoshka, since you're already in the helping mood, I guess you and Hyunh here won't mind carrying the lady's things to her room," Grandpa volunteered them, as Mr. Hyunh sluggishly complied through groaning. Susie snickered as she watched Oskar sulk at the suggestion of more work.
Olga watched as the two men walked lethargically towards her car. "It's the baby blue car with the flowers painted on, you can't miss it!" she yelled as they walked out of the door.
Grandpa watched the two until they were both out of the door. "Well, Ms. Pataki, I suppose I'll be showing you around the rest of the premises now, unless by now you've changed your mind about this place," Grandpa said quickly and under his breath.
Olga followed Grandpa back into the hallway and up the stairs. "Oh, of course I haven't changed my mind, sir. I just love this place. Although the place is a little worn at the edges, its got definite potential," Olga said absently, as she smoothed her hands over the woodwork on the staircase. "It's got some type of eclectic flair to it that makes it worthy of the.antique feel," Olga analyzed.
Grandpa nodded. "Yeah, sure. So anyway, this is the community restroom." Grandpa began. But, before he could finish, he was again interrupted by one of the boarders, this time by Mr. Simmons, who was exiting the bathroom.
"Oh, excuse me, Phil, but I think the sink's encountered the same plumbing problem as it had before." he began, before he saw Olga. "Why, oh my! .Is that you, Olga Pataki?" he said, folding his arms and looking at Olga.
Olga nodded and smiled warmly. "And yes, you must be Mr. Simmons. Do you remember me, though it's been ages?"
"Of course I remember you!" Mr. Simmons exclaimed, as Grandpa rolled his eyes. "How could I forget, the award winning Olga Pataki," Simmons said. Grandpa cleared his throat impatiently as Mr. Simmons was prepared to go into a tangent. "Ah well, I guess we can catch up at dinner tonight. Will I see you then?"
Olga shrugged. "Yes, most likely. I look forward to speaking with you again, Mr. Simmons," she said politely as Mr. Simmons departed.
Grandpa looked at Olga for a while before he spoke again. "What is it about you, anyway, that gets people around here so stirred up. It's like you've got a people magnet on you or something.not saying that's necessarily a bad thing," Grandpa commented, once again contradicting himself. Olga giggled and Grandpa continued. "So, as I was saying, community bathroom. One shower, one toilet, one sink. This is the only public bathroom in the boardinghouse, contrary to popular belief," Grandpa whispered to Olga, who nodded in full belief of Grandpa's statement.
"Okay, and so continuing on, we're getting close to.aw, shoot! Forgot to show you the laundry room, didn't I?" Grandpa realized as he stopped in front of a room and unlocked the door. "Ah, well, we'll get to that later," he resolved as he pushed open the door to Olga's room.
"Oh, my." Olga began, as she walked into the room and looked around. She smiled, though the room was not much to smile at.
"Oh my what? Well, you're smiling, so I'll assume that was a good thing," Grandpa said, eyeing Olga. "Anyway, this is your room. As advertised, a flat rate and affordable. May not have all of the modern amenities, but enough so that you can live. One bedroom, a general room and a small kitchenette.ah, self furnished, of course," Grandpa said, as he dusted off the cabinet in the empty kitchen.
Olga nodded, enchanted somehow even in the dinginess of the room. "Oh, of course." she said, trailing off. She landed on an old dusty couch that was left in the room and rose thick dust all around her, causing her to cough.
"Now, if you wouldn't mind, Ms. Pataki, let's get all the paper work out of the way.my least favorite part of my job.besides being the landlord of a boardinghouse," Grandpa afforded, scratching the back of his head. Olga rose from the couch, dusted herself off as she followed Grandpa out of the door. As she did, she saw Oskar and Mr. Hyunh approaching the room, hefting one of her chests in. Helga was not far behind, sweating profusely even though she was carrying a solitary box.
As Olga and Grandpa went down the hallway, she beamed brightly, excited to finally be out on her own, more or less. "I think I'm going to like it here!" she exclaimed, clasping her hands together adoringly.
Grandpa chuckled at her before he continued on down the hallway. "Hehe.that's what you think," he said under his breath. As Olga passed by Mr. Smith's room, his camera followed her walking up the hall, and then refocused to get a full body view. She eyed it suspiciously as Grandpa continued to walk.
Helga strolled up the steps to the boarding house, her book bag bouncing on her back. It had been a few days since Olga moved in, and so far everything was going well, surprisingly enough. Big Bob and Miriam were the same as they always were, though a little miffed at Olga's "rebellion", Big Bob more so.
She opened the door and stepped aside to let a stampede of Gertie's animals rush by. Then she walked in. Phil was asleep in the den on the rocking chair. One could easily hear Susie and Oskar arguing up the stairs. Mr. Hyunh was singing in the shower as he prepared for work, his Vietnamese accent completely gone and replaced by a smooth, country-western sounding voice. Heaven only knew how that worked. Ernie would arrive soon. Mr. Smith dashed past her and out the door, barely tipping his hat in acknowledgement. Helga continued on into the kitchen where Gertie stirred a giant pot of a bubbling something. She wore dusty, dirty, worn clothes with buckles and shiny buttons. A musket, hopefully a toy one, was strapped to her back. A gunpowder horn hung at her waist, and a bag, probably full of metal pellets, tied beside it.
"Where's Olga?" Helga asked, dumping her book bag in a chair.
Gertie sipped at what was presumed to be soup. Setting the ladle back in, she turned to Helga. "Anne Marie and Robert are setting up traps on the upper floors." She grabbed the musket, her finger slipping over the trigger. "You never know which way those British mongrels will be coming from."
Helga stared at her momentarily, her brow up. Then she shrugged, grabbed her backpack, and made her way up the steps. Oskar came running down past her, but she ignored him. One of the doors lay open and Helga noted it was Olga's, so she peeked in.
Only to find Olga wearing an apron, tearing down wallpaper, and painting walls. Or, more accurately, Mr. Simmons was tearing the paper on one side and Olga was painting the other.
"Hi baby sister!" Olga squealed, putting the designer roller into the dip pan and dashed over to pinch Helga cheeks, leaving paint stains.
She swatted her away, trying to get a better look into the room. "What are you guys doing?"
Mr. Simmons finished peeling a strip, folding it and placing it onto a large piece of plastic. He clasped his hands together. "We're redecorating! Giving the room it's own 'special' touch." He unclasped his hands to make quotation marks in the air as he said "special".
Helga looked at them both. ".And Phil agreed to this?"
Olga giggled, tying an apron on Helga. "Of course Grandpa did, silly. He said we could redecorate this room as long as I paid for all the supplies."
"We'll be making Mr. Hyunh's apartment even more 'special' next!" Mr. Simmons said excitedly.
"Isn't this wonderful, Baby sister?" Olga made her way back to the dip pan, handing a detail brush to Helga so she could take care of corners.
Helga stared at it, and then sighed, dipping it into a giant mixed batch of golden yellow paint. "Great."
"Are you sure you want to make dinner for the army, Anne Marie?" Grandma asked. "So many mouths to feed, and one must feed them enough to keep them nourished for the battles ahead!" Olga noted the old lady's colonial style uniform with a bit of fear. She'd already realized the poor old woman wasn't all there mentally.
"Oh yes, Gertrude, I'll make enough, I swear." Olga smiled. The answer seemed to mollify Grandma, and she handed Olga a spatula.
"Your weapon, private! I'll see you at Sixteen Hundred hours!" Saluting, she marched out of the kitchen. Olga looked down at the utensil in her hands.
"Sixteen hundred hours? I don't imagine it will take that long!"
"How long can it take one chick to make a dinner? Sheesh!" Ernie Potts complained. "I mean, really, ya put a little meat in the oven, fix up some potatoes, bada boom, bada bang!" he clapped his hands.
"No, no, Olga's making a more sophisticated dish." Mr. Hyunh smiled, looking down at his empty plate with anticipation. "It should be very good!"
Grandma, still wearing her Colonial style outfit, was barking something about it being past sixteen hundred hours. Finally Olga emerged from the kitchen, carrying a big pot.
"I sure hope everyone's brought their appetites, because I've made plenty of food!" She grinned, obviously not knowing that there was flour stuck to her cheeks and all over her dress.
Oskar looked greedily at the large pot. "Heh heh, finally! The cranky old lady never cooks enough, and my poor stomach grumbles so loudly at night, it keeps Suzie awake!"
"Oh, keep quiet you big baby!" Grandpa muttered under his breath. Olga was just too excited to notice.
"Well, I've cooked a big pot of Bubble and Squeak..." she set it in the middle of the table, with a long ladle sticking out of it. She ran back into the kitchen, and then emerged again with a pan of pastries. "Crumpets... and." Once again, she disappeared into the kitchen after depositing the food on the table. "Lemon cake!" she held the large, golden cake in front of her with pride. "I hope you..." She was cut off.
"BRITISH SYMPATHIZER!!!!" Grandma yelled while knocking the cake off of its pan.
Olga gasped as the cake flew through the air.
Just then, Mr. Simmons decided to join them. "Hello everyone! What's for dinner to." and he was cut off as the cake hit him smack in the face.
Olga ran over in worry while the rest cackled. Grandma was cheering about Britain's defeat.
Ernie and Oskar waited outside of the bathroom as Mr. Hyunh took his sweet time inside. They both groaned, holding their stomachs. Susie suddenly came from her room to rejoin the line.
"I'm so sorry." Olga sniveled, her hands together as she spoke to them.
Ernie waved a hand. "We're just so used to Grandma's cooking yours was too fancy for our stomach."
"Oh dear.maybe tomorrow I should cook something a little less foreign?"
Oskar licked his lips. "I think I can take a little bathroom time for that again, heh heh." Then his stomach made a loud noise and he curled over again, holding it.
Olga placed a worried hand to her mouth.
Grandpa walked by with a laugh, patting his own abdomen and then Olga's back. "The best food I ever had! Not a single commode break in two hours!"
"Speak for yourself, Grandpa." Mr. Hyunh groaned as he opened the door.
While the others leaned away from the sudden smell, Olga pinching her nose, Oskar dashed in.
"Oskar!" Ernie cried, since he had been next in line. "You weasel!"
Grandpa strolled down the upstairs hall, carrying a glass of orange juice, humming to himself. Olga's food hadn't sent him to bathroom once, besides normal nature calling.
Hearing something, he looked into Ernie's room. "Holy peppers!" He yelped, dropping his glass.
Olga stood inside on a ladder, one hand to her cheek in concern. Ernie was at the bottom of the ladder, a paint can on his head and paint dripping around him.
And half his room was pink.
"You can say that again." Ernie groaned.
Olga sniffled. "I'm so sorry!"
Ernie waited outside of the bathroom impatiently, Mr. Hyunh and Oskar in line behind him.
"Man, how long does she have to be in there?" He crossed his arms and leaned against the wall.
"Yes, she always take too much time!" Mr. Hyunh huffed in his thick Vietnamese accent, both of his hands on his hips with towel gripped tightly in one.
"Too bad we can't get rid of her somehow." Ernie sighed.
Oskar, who had been oddly quiet, perked up. "What if we got that little ugly girl to talk her into moving?"
"Helga is a very nice girl." Mr. Hyunh scolded.
"Yeah, but she still has a hot temper and she's not too pretty with that one eyebrow of hers." Ernie snickered, gesturing to his own brow.
Mr. Hyunh and Oskar stared at him and his unibrow.
"What?" Asked the short man, pushing from the wall and holding his hands out in question.
Mr. Hyunh just continued. "Besides, she's probably very happy that that girl is out of her house."
Oskar grinned. "I bet you five dollars I can get Olga kicked out."
Ernie snorted. "If we can't get a weasel like you kicked out, or you haven't gotten yourself kicked out by now.how are you going to do it to her?"
"Are you in or not?"
Ernie went back to his previous position against the wall with his arms crossed. "Yeah, yeah. But when you lose, I want my five bucks and the ten you owed me from two weeks ago."
"I am staying out of this one." Mr. Hyunh sighed with his hands in the air.
"All right! Heh heh!" Oskar chuckled, rubbing his greedy hands together. "You better have your five bucks ready, Ernie. Don't you worry."
"I'll believe it when I see it you cheap-skate."
It was then Olga finally announced her leaving of the joint bathroom that all three men rushed to go in next, ignoring the line's waiting positions. Mr. Simmons came and calmly walked in while they didn't notice since they were busy bickering and scrambling.
Finally, Ernie turned as the door clicked shut. "Hey, who went in?"
"Please baby sister?" Came Olga's whiny voice over the phone. Helga sighed, sitting on her bed in her room while talking to Olga.
"Olga, I can't promise anything."
"Just try, Baby Sister. I want Mummy and Daddy to see how well I'm doing here!"
"I'll try." Helga sighed in aggravation, hanging up the phone from her extension in her bedroom. Olga was going to have a huge dinner at the boarding house the next day and Olga somehow managed to convince her to try and make their parents come.
She put her head in her hands. "I must be getting soft."
"OLGA!" Big Bob cried from downstairs.
She hopped off her bed, clenching her fists. "It's HELGA dad! HELGA!"
"I can't believe I let myself get dragged into eating dinner at this run down, old rickety place." Big Bob grunted, overlooking the aged building. They waited just outside for only a minute before Olga opened the door, smiling brightly.
"I'm so very glad you came to dinner! You're going to just love it! I'm afraid Mr. Simmons couldn't join us today, something about schoolwork." She explained and basically dragged Helga into the kitchen while Bob and Miriam followed silently. The usual round of greetings and introductions went around before everybody sat down at the table, which was elegantly set, wine glasses, special china, the works.
"So Olga, what new exciting dish are you going to be serving us today?" Susie asked and Oskar made a face and piped in.
"As long as it doesn't have any of that green stringy vegetable, you know, the one that smells like grandpa's socks. Eh heh heh heh"
"Oskar!" Susie admonished. "That meal was very good, and don't be such a baby, cabbage is a very good thing to eat."
"I was just telling the truth Susie." The two of them proceeded into a silent argument.
"Attention everybody! I've made this dinner in honor of the very kind people who allowed me to move in here and helped make my change to living on my own just as easy as could be." Olga said then disappeared behind a corner and brought a dish.
"What is that?" Helga asked in suspicion at the smell, the others were looking at it rather oddly as well.
"Champignons à l'Ail!" Was the reply and Helga made a face as her sister set something down that looked a lot like mushrooms and croissants.
"And that would make it look more appetizing...how?"
"It's Garlic mushrooms silly."
"Ooh well that makes a whole big world of difference." Came a dark retort.
"Next up-Champignons à la Grecque!" Helga heard and then saw Oskar make a face and concealed an agreeing snort of disapproval.
"Lovely, more mushrooms."
"Watch it little lady."
This comment she chose to ignore.
"And for dessert.Grand Tiramisu!" She said but sat down. "That can come later."
"What is Grand Tiramisu or whatever?" Helga asked skeptically.
Kind of a French cheese cake."
"Well why couldn't you have just said that?" Helga muttered and rolled her eyes, then picked at her food for a second as everybody, after eyeing the food in mild skepticism, finally started to eat.
After a while, probably the worst possible thing to happen, happened. "So..Old Timer, is this nuthouse worth letting my daughter stay here? I see she's done some changes, for the better of course-" Bob started in and Helga groaned.
"Daad.please-"
"Pipe down!"
"Of course this place is worth letting your daughter live here, it's a great place for her to stay warm atmosphere." At this Mr. Potts snorted into his drink and ignored a glare from Phil. "Good prices, the works! She even has her own room and everything." He added.
"Oh, yes daddy. It's great here, I just love it so much!" Olga chimed in and giggled.
"Oh, yeah, just grand." Potts added and Oskar laughed a little.
"She cooks so much, it's like a dream come true! Always room for seconds, or thirds even!"
He grinned and Susie gasped. "Oskar! Please!"
"Well it's true Susie" and again they fell into argument.
"However, some of the decorations I could definitely do without." Phil muttered.
"What was that?" Bob asked angrily when Olga went to grab the dessert.
"If I see one more frilly little antique critter around, I'll smash it." Potts muttered and Helga then snorted into her drink and had to stop herself from laughing.
"Who asked you loons to join in this conversation?!" Phil shot at them and then roughly forked Oskar's hand as he went for Olga's vulnerable meal. "Leave her stuff alone you no good for nothing cheating scum!"
Miriam exchanged glances with Arnold's grandma and Helga shook her head in disgust as Olga walked into the room with the dessert to find nearly everybody in the midst of an argument.
"Oh dear." Helga heard then had to stop herself from laughing outright when she caught wind of the exclusive argument that had broken out between Arnold's grandpa and her dad.
"Oh! Not that incident again! It was an accident for mercy's sake, the car damage was fixed and everything's just rosy now!" Was what she heard from Phil's side only to be countered by.
"You old bag of wrinkles, you'd just better be thankful you're so blasted lucky at Golf! You still should have paid for both yours and MY damage, twice! I should sue you for every penny you have.and it probably would only be pennies..." They were arguing about a time when the two cars had had a simple fender bender, which was followed by a golf contest to find out who would pay damage repair for both vehicles.
It looked like the food was going to start to fly, so all at once Helga, Miriam, Arnolds Grandma, and Olga backed up from the table and watched as the argument heated up to such a point.
"THAT'S IT! Come on Miriam, Helga, we're out of here!" Bob shouted.
Oskar let out a loud yell when a fork came in contact with his hand. "Keep your mitts off my food, Kokoshka!
"But Dad!" Helga protested.
"You can do whatever you want, we're out of here, come on Miriam." Bob ordered and stormed towards the exit muttering profusely to himself.
Helga snickered when a croissant bounced off his head and fell to the floor, almost immediately bringing an end to the dinner of disaster.
Oskar peeked into the den, Grandpa was sound asleep in his rocking chair, his head lolled on the back of the wooden frame. Snickering to himself, he snuck over and slipped his fingers between the wooden bars, pulling a ring of keys from Phil's pocket. Pausing when Grandpa muttered something about raspberries, and Oskar stiffened when Phil's head rolled towards him. Finally, letting out a breath, he snuck back out of the room.
Grandpa suddenly jolted up, looking around in confusion. "Eh, who's there?" He peered back and forth, shrugged, and fell right back to sleep. Oskar hid around the doorframe with the set of keys held tightly to his chest. He waited a minute, and then tiptoed up the stairs. "Heh heh, I'm going to get five bucks!"
Olga, almost as if it were a practiced ballet step, moved out of her room. To her surprise a set of stairs was pulled down from the ceiling to her left and Oskar was perched at the top, struggling with a set of keys. She walked up to the bottom step, watching him cheer as the final key clicked the lock open and he pulled it away, rubbing his hands together and chuckling. "What are you doing, Mr. Kokoshka?" She asked perkily.
He jumped, the keys flying down and then jingling as Olga caught them effortlessly, resting on a single foot and leaning into the air with her long, slender form. She moved back into a normal standing position, and looked at the ring. "Aren't these Phil's?" She asked sweetly, her face betraying no suspicion.
Oskar thought about it a moment. His plan had been a simple one: steal something from Arnold's room and blame it on Olga.then take it and sell it. Still.a new, better one came. "Yeah. Heh heh, Grandpa gave them to me. I was going to get it open for you." He said as he came down the stairs.
"For me?" She looked at the keys quizzically once more.
He nodded vigorously, beginning to sneak away down the hall. "Grandpa wanted you to redecorate up there. A new room for.uh.Grandma. Yeah, heh heh." And with that, he made a mad dash for his own room, slamming it shut behind him. Olga looked at the keys once more, then shrugged, and strolled up to look around. She smiled all the way as several plans came to her mind.
Helga wandered through the front door, lugging a paper bag full of the strangest groceries from the most far away stores in town. Olga had sent her out in search of exotic things for dinner and she was tired from the long trek. Kicking the boarding house door closed behind a stampede of Grandma's pets, she peered about. The place was oddly quiet for so late in the day without dinner being set yet.
Then she heard the toilet flush upstairs and decided, perhaps, it wasn't so strange after all. Smirking, she went into the den, setting the bag down, and went over to Phil. "Hey! Grandpa!" She shouted in his ear.
"What?! Who?! I didn't do it, it was Jimmy Kofka!" He yelled, snapping forward and nearly falling out of the chair. Helga cackled and he paused to glare at her, and then looked around. "What time is it?"
"A little late in the day. Surprised no one's complaining for dinner." She looked out into the hallway, hands on her hips. "Speaking of which, where is Olga? She usually practically pounces on me as soon as I open the door."
"Aw, that's sweet. Baby sister misses her great big hug from her older, award winning sister." Grandpa clasped his hands together, mocking her big sister's usual manner of speaking.
Helga stared at him for a moment, deciding to ignore his usual quirks, and went back to looking around. She picked the bag up and went to the kitchen. Ernie was just beginning to sit in the dining room, waiting at the table with an almost frightful expression as if he already knew what was for dinner. Grandpa, yawning, followed and Ernie blinked as they passed by.
"What are you doing down here, Gramps?" He asked, confused.
Grandpa blinked. "And just what is that supposed to mean?"
Ernie shrugged. "The stairs are pulled down that lead to Arnold's room and the door's open. I assumed you were up there."
There was a sudden rattling and a crash as Helga dropped something and poked her head out the kitchen doorway. "What?"
Grandpa scoffed. "I'm the only one with the key to that room and it's right here." He said, patting his pocket. He blinked, realizing he hadn't felt or heard anything. He patted it again, bewildered. Then he and Helga exchanged glances.
They both ran off like a single shot up the stairs.
Barreling down the hall and fighting to be the first up the steps, they barged in just as Olga began to peel a layer of wallpaper. Helga screamed at the top of her lungs in panic and Grandpa shouted, "Oh no!" He ran over with Helga right behind.
"What are you doing?" Helga gasped.
"Whatever do you mean, baby sister? I'm redecorating." Olga smiled brightly, pressing one hand to her cheek, the other clasping a tiny scraper. Only a small corner was peeled down, but both Helga and Grandpa stared at it in horror.
Grandpa stuttered for a moment and then managed to get the words out. "Wha.re.redecorating? No! Who told you to do that?" His hands held to his face.
"Well, Mr. Kokoshka said it was a surprise for-"
Grandpa interrupted her, "Oskar?! Ooohh, that weasel's going to get it this time!" He then rolled up a sleeve and shook his bony fist. Phil then promptly headed down the set of stairs and down the hall. "Oskar, I want to have a word with you." He called in false cheer.
Helga and Olga stared after him, and then Helga calmly walked over to her big sister, removing the scraper from her hand and leading her down the stairs. True, her sister drove her nuts, but the boarding house had been her one safe place from her family, the last piece of Arnold she had left. She'd rather the worst of it all be in one place rather than two. "Look, Olga, don't you think you've proved your point?"
"My point?" Olga asked innocently, watching as her younger sister flung the scraper into the air, it letting out a loud "thunk" sound as it dug into the wall, just missing Mr. Hyunh as he left his room, sipping a cup of coffee.
Helga set an arm around Olga's shoulders, pulling her closer to make sure she listened. "Yes. You wanted to prove you could make it on your own, and you did."
"But baby sister, I like it here! I can't just go back now!"
They stopped after they got off the bottom step, Oskar dashing from his room with Grandpa not far behind, hollering and waving his fists. "Yes, yes you can." She considered her words for a pause. "The house isn't the same without you." The words barely squeezed out, there was truth behind them and she hated every syllable that she was forced to say.
"That's so sweet baby sister! But-"
"Mom's been ignoring her aerobics.and Dad really misses you."
Olga thought about it a moment, one manicured fingernail held to her lips. ".Really?"
Helga nodded. "Oh yes. He hasn't said it out loud, but he talks about how much nicer the place had been, how quiet the house is."
Grandpa came trotting back up the steps, muttering under his breath about Oskar running outside. He then walked up to the girls as if he had just remembered something, which, he had. "You know, this reminds me of the time when my friend's older brother got in a fight with his parents. He was so mad, he moved out of the house with nothing more than his pride. And a ham sandwich."
"What happened," Olga asked breathlessly.
"Well, he was determined to show his parents that he could make it on his own, so he took a room right here in the boarding house. He didn't have any money, so he worked around the place to earn his keep. After he'd been here a while, he decided to invite his parents over to show them how well he was doing on his own."
"And I'll just bet they were so proud of him when they saw him!" Olga gushed.
"Well, no, but while he was arguing with his parents, he left his room unlocked."
"Where are you going with this?" Helga interjected.
"Aren't you listening? The ham sandwich! I finally had access to that ham sandwich!" Phil cackled gleefully.
Helga rolled her eyes and put her arm back around Olga's shoulders. "Listen, Olga, Mom and Dad really miss you. You're all they talk about at dinner." Olga didn't need to know exactly what direction those conversations tended to take.
Really?" Olga asked, a glimmer of hope in her eyes.
"Criminy! Why else do you think Big Bob got so upset?" Helga asked. Olga didn't notice Phil behind her, clenching his fists and mumbling about the 'big blowhard'.
"Do you really think so, Baby Sister?" Olga said, clasping one of Helga's hands in hers.
"Well, sure," she said, prying Olga's fingers from hers one by one.
"You're right," Olga cried happily. She turned to Phil, who looked like he'd been caught with his hands in the cookie jar. Oblivious, Olga ran over and embraced him.
"And I couldn't have done it without you," she said. "Thank you so much for being there for me and my baby sister. I just know that you've helped bring my family closer together."
Phil looked over Olga's head at Helga, who shrugged.
"Well, I'd better start packing right away," Olga said, wiping a tear from her eye. She then pranced off to her room to start packing.
Phil sighed as the door shut behind Olga. "I am going to miss that girl's cooking." And he then trudged off down the hall, holding his stomach, knowing what was going to come once Gertie started cooking again.
Helga shook her head at Phil, a half smile on her face. She looked down the hall, watching Mr. Hyunh go into the joint bathroom. Ernie was downstairs, Grandpa heading there, and Oskar was outside. Mr. Simmons was nowhere to be seen.
Helga looked left, and then right.
Then she sneaked up the steps, going into Arnold's room and softly closing the door behind her. She tiptoed over to his old bed, sitting gently as if it would break at any moment. She ran her hands over the old sheets. Not a speck of dust dare tarnish such a place, as Grandma, or Helga, kept the room spick and span.
She sighed softly, falling onto her side and burying her face into the pillow and inhaling deeply. That old familiar scent remained within the folds of cotton, but just barely. "How I miss the smell of your hair.I never did figure out what shampoo you used." She swooned, hugging the pillow a few moments.
Hearing a small sound, her eyes snapped open to see Grandpa peeking in with eyebrows raised. He blinked once, and then twice before Helga sat straight up, setting the pillow back in place. Then she smoothed the sheets and laughed sheepishly.
Grandpa stared for an instant, and in one swift motion, a jingling blur flew at her and she caught it on reflex. It was Grandpa's set of keys. "I'll let you lock up." He said, turning and closing the door with a knowing, small smile.
Grandpa closed the door and made his way down the steps, shaking his head. "She's crazier than Pookie."
Helga stared after him, and then at the ring of keys in her hand.
Grinning, she pulled a free key from her pocket. Grandpa wasn't the only one with a key.
"Welcome home darling," Miriam said as soon as Olga was through the door. "We've missed you so much."
After sharing a brief embrace with her, Olga asked, "Where's Daddy?"
"He's in there watching TV," Miriam pointed.
Olga walked into the living room, holding her suitcases with both hands. Bob was sitting in his recliner, watching TV as usual. He didn't acknowledge her presence at all.
"Daddy?" Olga managed to chirp out.
He turned his head slightly, but then returned it to the screen. "Oh... you're back," Bob said as nonchalantly as he could make it.
"Yes," she nodded. "I didn't realize how much you wanted me back in the house."
"Yeah, me either," he said, lifting the remote and flipping through the channels rapidly. "But I'm glad you're back... nobody makes a cup of coffee like my little Olga does."
"Oh Daddy!" she cried out happily, dropping her suitcases with a loud thud and running over to him. Olga wrapped him into a hug, but Bob only patted her arm.
"Well isn't this great?" Miriam smiled, joining in the hug. "We're a family again!"
"Oh gag me," Helga scowled, watching from the stairs.
"Come on Mummy, I'll make you a nice smoothie," Olga said smiling.
"Oh no honey, I'm fine. Really," Miriam replied, shaking her head.
"Nonsense," she said. "I'll even put in extra strawberries, just like you like it."
Miriam hesitated, but eventually gave in. "Well if you insist..."
"Perfect!" Olga said and clasped her hands. "You get the Tabasco sauce and I'll get the blender!"
Helga watched as her mother and sister disappeared into the kitchen. She then looked at her father, who was still busy flipping through the channels. She sighed and left the stairs, walking toward the recliner.
"So..." she said slowly. "Everything's okay? You're going to let Olga pursue her new career while she stays with us?"
"Of course not," he said, eyes still glued to the TV. "But we'll just sweep this under the rug for now. Olga will forget all about acting and things will return to normal, you'll see. Big Bob is still king of his castle, master of his domain, and nothing is going to change that."
Helga ignored the sounds coming from downstairs as her parents and Olga talked and laughed. Sighing, she pulled a fresh piece of paper from her backpack.
"Dear Arnold," She started, talking out loud as she went along. "Your room is safe yet again, I stopped the horrible Olga from doing anything to it. I can't say I'm happy to have her home," She paused, hearing Bob's roaring laughter. Somewhere down inside, it hurt. They were never so happy about her. She shook her head. It didn't matter anyway.
"But I'm glad she's not at the boarding house anymore. I need someplace to get away from them all.
Grandpa misses Olga's cooking, and Grandma's convinced Olga was a spy for Russia. Other than that, all is back to normal. What's considered normal around here, anyway.
See, everything worked out even without you, hair boy.
I played baseball with the guys after all. My team won. We were up against the Juniors at our high school, Bartlett High. Wolfgang still tries to beat us.
We could have used you for a short stop, though.
Even if you don't hit well, whenever you do, you usually smack someone. Too bad you couldn't wallop that moron, Wolfgang, one.
Well, I'll see you around, football-head.
Helga Pataki
P.S. Okay, maybe I miss you a little. I need someone to throw my spitballs at."
Written By: Old Betsy
Edited By: The Five Avengers
Directed By: Nicole K.
Produced By: Nicole K.
Based on characters created by Craig Bartlett
Most characters are privately owned by such parties as Nickelodeon, Viacom, etc. and are used without permission, but not without respect.