I partially woke up and then fell back asleep several times. I finally felt super-lazy and began to get up. I wondered what time it was, and then I realized where I was. The plain metal walls stared back at me, showing just how far from home I was. I belatedly noticed the piece of paper on the table beside me. It read:

Rachel,

Feel free to stay in here for as long as you want. I am only a phone call away if you need me. Please let me know before you leave your room though.

Agent Coulson

The last line confused me. Did he think the helicarrier was dangerous? Did he think I was dangerous? Then I remembered that he had asked me not to leave the room, yet I had visited Clint and Loki. He had barged into Loki's cell like he thought I was in danger. He had been so kind to me, I really should respect his rules and not make him worry so much. An image of my father again appeared in my mind, and I carefully considered the comparison. I mean, they looked nothing the same, but they had similar personalities. Maybe it was just wishful thinking though because...

They were gone. Everyone. Well, maybe I shouldn't be jumping to conclusions. Right. Talk to Coulson first. Find out everything I can about myself in this universe. It would be really strange, but maybe there was another Rachel Christenson out there. Maybe, because of this universe's many differences, she had ended up never meeting Meagan Smith. It was possible. Maybe some of the other people I knew had met the other Rachel still. But would other Rachel be like me at all? I still wouldn't be able to return to my old life. How would I have reacted if another Rachel came and tried to share my life? Confused. I should be confused now, but...I haven't had a lot time to process. I've been running to save the world and not really noticing even...

Oh no. The avengers had seen me running around all future knowing and would expect me to continue with that confidence and skill. I couldn't be like that all the time! I'm fairly confident, but I said and did things I normally would not do because I knew the future. What was I going to do? Wait. It was fairly unlikely I would even ever interact with any of the avengers again. Good.

Alright, so...what now? I mean, my usefulness is over. I know very little about the future, very little combat skills, but have no where to go. Maybe SHIELD could 'pay' me for my 'services' by getting me an ID and a little cash so I could start a new life. Should they though? I knew enough about the heroes' lives that, while not being useful for SHIELD, some enemy could use it to hurt the avengers if they got their hands on me. Could I even start a new life? I was only through my third year of college, so SHIELD couldn't just 'give' me a degree. I couldn't remember my grades from all my classes, but I didn't want to be dishonest. More questions buzzed through my mind, but I knew they only one with the answers was Coulson.

"Agent Coulson here."

"Hi Agent Coulson. This is Rachel. Are you busy right now?"

"I can be right over if you need me." That didn't necessarily answer the question...

"Nothing urgent. I just had a couple questions. Figured you wanted a couple of your own answered as well."

"Give me five and I'll be there." Since the fact that it wasn't urgent had been ignored, I didn't push the matter any more.

"Sure. Thanks, Agent Coulson."

After he had hung up, I grabbed my sketch pad again. I played with some shading techniques before flipping the page and starting to sketch my mother. I wanted a picture of her, and despite my incredible memory, to make the most accurate drawing I should do it soon. I didn't get very far before there was a knock on the door, but that was okay. I could work on it more later.

"Hello, Agent Coulson. Come on in." He responded graciously to my invitation.

"Thank you, Rachel." He pulled the chair from the desk over, while I sat on the bed. "Now what did you want to ask?"

"I just kind of wondered what was SHIELD's plan for me. I mean, I'm not a spy or a soldier. My computer skills are above average, but I'm sure you've hired people far smarter than me. I'm not a scientist either. I haven't even finished college. I'm not useful in this organization." Coulson looked at me bemused and a little sad.

"What do you think my job is?" This pulled me up a little short.

"You are the SHIELD liaison for Mr Stark, SHIELD leadership for Thor, and mentor for Agents Romanoff and Barton." I said the last one a little hesitantly. The job relationship between Natasha, Clint, and Coulson had only been hinted at in the movie. "I also know you have some fighting moves. You took out some thieves at a convenience store on the way to New Mexico."

"If you boil it down though, at this point in my career, I am a liaison. Between Director Fury and everyone else connected to SHIELD. I used to be a field agent, but now, I am a diplomat. If I remember correctly, you said you were studying political science. How would you like to be my assistant?" I think I gaped like a fish for several moments. I wasn't quite sure since my brain had mysteriously gone blank. It made complete sense that his job was basically diplomatic, know that I thought about it. It was more the question that he asked me that had thrown me off guard.

"You want...you want me to what?" Coulson chuckled sightly.

"I think this is the most unruffled I have ever see you. Evil villains don't phase you, but job offers do?" I blushed.

"I've had time to process. I don't think I was really awake when he threatened me."

"What about when you talked with him for almost an hour?" Coming from someone else, I would have thought they were teasing me. Coulson seemed genuinely curious why I had gone and spoke to Loki.

"He was a character with a tragic story. He has done bad and tried to do worse, but I don't think he fully understood his actions. We were a means to an end. I don't think he views us as intelligent as himself, species wise."

"He has your pity." It was a statement, not a question, but I nodded anyway. "Even though he has killed people." Coulson was trying to make a point, I knew, but what point? Oh. He was comparing the 'forgiveness' that I had given Loki to the condemnation I was giving myself. He did have a small point, but I hadn't really forgiven Loki. I just couldn't reconcile the deeds to the character.

"His backstory has my pity. He himself...has not become separate from that yet." Coulson nodded sagely.

"You are still adjusting." My laughter was a little harsh.

"I have barely started adjusting. I feel like I've fallen into a dream. The consequences of that perspective on my actions have become like a nightmare though."

"How?" A small part of my brain realized Coulson was trying to led me through a mental healing process.

"I acted far more bravely and rashly than I normally do. Knowledge gave me confidence. What little the ave...heroes have seen of me has given them a false characterization of me."

"I doubt that. You seem very outspoken. What does it matter what they think anyway?"

"You mean besides that fact that they are heroes?" He gave a very slow nod, as if debating if he wanted to hear more of my reasoning behind heroes opinion's mattering and hearing the 'besides' part. "I guess because they are some of the few people I 'know' without having the past that never happened hanging over them. And the fact that if I am going to be staying at SHIELD, I would like to be able to help them in small ways. Having them think I am different than I am...I guess its just a natural instinct to be honest or at least fear of not being able to live up to the false persona I have in their eyes." Having accepted my answer, Coulson directed the conversation to a new topic.

"What do you mean 'past that never happened?'" Darn it. I was going to have to admit the reality of the situation to myself.

"I guess I need more data, but I don't think my best friend knows who I am. I'm from a parallel universe, so of course things are different. Even if there is another Rachel out there, she could be any kind of different from me since so much of this world is different. I could met someone who I have known since I was little, and they wouldn't have a clue who I was, or assume I was the other Rachel. It wouldn't be the same." Tears were pouring down my face, but I had a pretty good reason to do so. Home was gone. My friends were gone. My mom was gone. I was alone.

"You are not alone. Do you understand me Rachel? You are not alone." Coulson spoke quite forcefully before sitting on the bed next to me and pulling me into a hug. I don't know why I let him, I guess it was that whisper of 'protector' about him. When I finished feeling sorry for myself, I realized I had probably ruined Coulson's suit with my tears and that I had nothing to blow my nose with. Embarrassed, I went into the bathroom and used toilet paper as tissue. Then I gave myself a little pep talk.

Captain had had his whole world yanked away from him, and he wasn't a weeping mess. Clint had been taken over and forced to do things for the bad guys, yet had jumped into battle moments later. Natasha had some horrifying backstory and still fought for what was right. Banner had a destructive persona yet still worked as a doctor. Stark had almost died, and he has become a superhero. I had simply walked into a world I had thought was fiction. I could carry on as they had. When I walked back into the room feeling much more composed, Coulson took one look at me and spoke.

"Rachel, you have the right to break down and cry. You have the right to feel overwhelmed. It does not make you weak, it makes you human. If you ever need someone to talk to, I will always be available. I am even there if you need someone to be with you while you cry. You are not alone." He stood up from the bed. "You may need some space though, so if you don't have any objections, I'll leave you to think." I nodded, feeling slightly overwhelmed by Coulson's conviction. "Don't think Agents Romanoff or Barton haven't ever had a bad day. Heroes especially have the right to cry."

After Coulson left, the words of Superman came once again into my head.

Wish that I could cry
Fall upon my knees
Find a way to lie,
'Bout a home I'll never see

I had survived the Avengers movie. I had saved hundreds of lives. I had had no choice in the cost of my family and friends. What would they do when I didn't return from New York? Forget me? I don't know how my mom is going to get through it. Was it worth it though? Was it worth one person giving up their life so that so many others could live? Of course. If I had been given the choice before, I would have said yes. I would have liked to say goodbye, but then again I wouldn't have really believed that I could travel to the world of the Avengers.

I let myself cry a few more tears for what I had lost while I drew a realistic picture of my mother. It didn't matter that I would never see her again, I would make her proud and make the most of this situation. A political adviser for the SHIELD agency was a career choice beyond my dreams. I mean, mutants were a part of this world too, right? I could totally see myself fighting for mutant rights. Coulson had already proven he would watch out for me, so I would always have someone. I wouldn't be alone. I would be the best I could be with what life had given me. I am Rachel Christenson, and I am an agent of SHIELD; a protector of the world.

And so it is done!

If anyone is curious, I did change the Meagan and Rachel friendship story in the last chapter. No it fits Rachel's personality better.

Confession: Originally the point of this story was to get Rachel to Avengers Tower and help the Avengers become a family. Hence the old title: "What a family is connected by." I however, am taking a church trip which will have me too busy to write for eighteen months. I had thought to have the story 'end' with Rachel getting to Avenger's tower, but then this ending with Coulson wrote itself, and I like it. When I return (in eighteen months) I do plan on making a story with Rachel in the tower. I'm not quite sure if I will just continue this story or make it a separate one, but trust me, I have LOTS of ideas and much plot line for Rachel in the tower.

Thank you for all your reviews and support. You should see the goofy grin I get whenever I see a review. Lots of love to all you lovely readers!