A/N: Happy Birthday, Kendall Schmidt! Believe it or not, this was actually inspired by a small part of my one-shot, "Super Boyfriends." Reading that is not necessary for you to understand this, but if you have read "Super Boyfriends," you will understand how a certain part served as inspiration for this one-shot.
Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush, but negotiations are underway. My people are talking to their people…
Virtually Impossible
I had a dumbfounded expression on my face as I blinked in disbelief at two of my best friends. The whole situation, oddly enough, was so amusing, I actually found myself suppressing laughter. It was laughable really.
"That has got to be the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard!" I commented.
"James is right though, Logie," Carlos said.
I noticed how Carlos was hiding behind James as he said that. I inwardly snickered. Seriously, what did he think I was going to do? Deck him for siding with James? I wasn't the one with anger management issues. I wasn't Kendall.
"Okay, then name one time when you have. Just one," James replied.
I racked my brain as I tried to come up with one such example. I furrowed my eyebrows in concentration. Surely this couldn't be as difficult as it seemed to be, could it? I mean how long have I known them all? Since the third grade.
The color drained from my face. I had a startling revelation. Oh my goodness! They couldn't be right! Right? Do you mean to tell me that I have known them for almost a decade, and not once have I done what James and Carlos accused me of never having done? That's virtually impossible! So then why can't I come up with one measly example?
"Ha! You can't do it!" Carlos boasted.
I glared daggers at Carlos, who promptly retreated behind James even more than before. His trusty helmet slid over his eyes. Even though I doubted he could see me, I rolled my eyes at Carlos.
"How about we make a friendly little wager then? I bet you twenty dollars that you can't tell Kendall, 'no' once in twenty-four hours," James stated.
"Ooh! I want in on that!" Carlos chimed in.
I narrowed my eyes at Carlos, wordlessly telling him to get back to hiding behind James. I really needed to get new friends. What kind of friends would bet actual money on something as absurd as this? What does that say about them? Heck, what does that say about me?
"If this truly was a friendly wager, then you wouldn't bet any money at all," I quickly pointed out.
"This is a friendly wager! If it wasn't, I'd have bet you like $500 or something," James retorted.
"What's the matter, Logie? Are you scared?" Carlos asked.
Oh, the irony of the situation. This coming from the person cowering behind one of his much larger best friends. Right. And I'm the scared one?!
"I'm not scared, and I'll prove it. Get ready to lose twenty bucks, you two. You're on!" I said, before shaking hands with both James and Carlos, sealing the deal.
The way I saw it, it was clear sailing from here. Forty bucks, here I come. All I had to do was say, "no" to Kendall once. Just once. This would be a piece of cake. I was feeling pretty confident, and why shouldn't I? I believed I could do anything I set my mind to, so really, how hard could this be?
XXXXX
James, Carlos, and I were sitting on the orange couch playing video games when Kendall entered the apartment. This was perfect! Now was my chance. If I played my cards right, I could win the bet with plenty of time to spare!
"I wanna play too! Scoot over, Logie," Kendall said.
Without giving it another thought, I slid over on the couch until I was next to a smirking Carlos. He arched his eyebrows at me, giving me a knowing look. I retaliated by nudging him in the ribs with my elbow. Serves him right…
What was wrong with me? I can too say, 'no' to Kendall! It's one word. Two letters. In other contexts, I've used the word plenty of times. So theoretically, this should be no different.
It was okay though. I still had loads of time to tell Kendall, 'no' just once. I wasn't worried. After all, it wasn't like it was crunch time or anything like that. Besides, even if it was crunch time, telling someone, 'no' took what? Like one second! So really, I could wait until I'm twenty-three hours, fifty-nine minutes, and fifty-nine seconds into the bet to say, 'no' to Kendall. Of course, not that I will! That would be cutting it way too close! I'm not reckless! I'm not Carlos!
"Hey, the platinum controller is mine!" Kendall exclaimed.
Don't give it to him, Logan. Don't give it to him! Just flat out refuse him. All you have to do is tell him one word, two letters. You can do it. It's a piece of cake.
"Here you go," I found myself saying whilst handing over the platinum controller.
What was that? Seriously, what was that? No! N-O! Is that really so hard to say…to Kendall? Why is it so hard to say to Kendall? You have no problem saying no to James and Carlos. Why is that? What makes Kendall so different? Why…Why are James and Carlos looking at me like that?
James and Carlos both looked like they would burst out laughing at a moment's notice. They obviously found this highly amusing. I didn't think there was anything amusing about this whatsoever. They may have won the battle, but the war was far from over. And by war, I mean bet.
XXXXX
Kendall came out into the living room in his hockey gear. I wanted to make some snide comment about his choice of wardrobe for lounging around the apartment all day, but I held my tongue, which was easier said than done too. Kendall was just asking for it…
"I think I'll go hit the rink. Anyone wanna come with?" Kendall asked, before turning towards me. "Logie, you in?"
Just say no. Just say no? What was this? D.A.R.E.? Tell him that you have other plans, even though you have no such plans, but Kendall doesn't need to know that. Say you don't want to go with him. Say that his competitive streak makes playing hockey with him less fun. Okay, on second thought, that's a little extreme. Yeah, don't say that, Logan. He won't like that. Not that it matters what he does or doesn't like, but yeah…
I couldn't help but notice James and Carlos hanging on my every word, craning their necks in anticipation of the one word that would make me $40 richer. They might as well pull out their wallets now.
"Okay," I answered.
You know that saying mind over matter? Well I think it's both in this case! It's like my mind won't let me say no to Kendall. However, it's not just my mind either! It's like some physiological response prevents me from telling Kendall no. But that's ridiculous, right? That's utterly insane! Not to mention not at all logical!
As I went to my room to get my hockey gear, I was soon aware that I had an entourage. James and Carlos, of course! Who else would it be? You'd think they had nothing better to do than follow me around and pester me!
"I don't want to hear a word!" I said before they had a chance to make a single smart-alec remark.
"Someone's whipped!" Carlos commented. He made a whipping gesture while saying, "Yow!"
James and I both met one another's gaze. He merely shrugged his shoulders. I was fighting an internal battle not to introduce my forehead to the top of my desk…repeatedly.
"Carlos, that's not the sound a whip makes!" I replied.
"Oh yeah? Then what sound does it make?" Carlos retorted.
What does he want me to do? Spell it out? Pronounce it syllabically? Either course of action would be extremely difficult given that the sound a whip makes isn't exactly something found in Webster's Dictionary.
"Wha-psh!" I answered.
Carlos scoffed.
"That sounds nothing like a whip!" he remarked.
"Oh, and yow does?" I shot back.
"You better hurry it up, Logie. Wouldn't want to keep your boyfriend waiting," James commented, grinning like the idiot he is.
Okay, it's one thing not being able to tell Kendall no, but now this? Now, they were taking this too far. Boyfriend? Really? That's a stretch. A part of me knew that he was only joking, but a part of me honestly…well let's just say that it ruffled my feathers. Not that I have feathers…That was a figure of speech, you see…
"Hardy, har, har. You're so funny, James!" I said, my voice saturated with sarcasm.
James clasped both his hands over his chest right where his heart was. He appeared deeply moved by my words. But I saw right through his shenanigans. He wasn't fooling me.
"Did you hear that, Carlos? Logan actually thinks I'm funny," James stated.
"I was being sarcastic!" I said, raising my voice.
XXXXX
I woke up the next morning to find James and Carlos hovering over me. Just as a startled scream was about to pass through my lips, Carlos clamped his hand over my mouth, muffling said scream. When did they…How long have they…Why were they…They had some serious explaining to do!
When Carlos finally removed his hand from my mouth, which in retrospect took him much longer than it probably should have, I immediately started to try to get to the bottom of all this.
"When we were younger, it was no big deal, but now that we're older, this is bordering on creepy," I commented.
"Did you know that you sleep with your mouth open? How do you do that? Doesn't your mouth get dry?" Carlos inquired.
Right, because a case of dry mouth was the issue of utmost importance here…Knowing that two of my best friends had been watching me sleep made me feel so…violated. I mean they had their own freaking room! They should, gee, I don't know, use it!
"Why were you watching me sleep?" I demanded.
"Duh! So we could make sure whether or not you managed to tell Kendall, 'no' yet!" Carlos responded like it was the most obvious answer in the universe.
"Yeah, we couldn't just take your word for it. For all we know, you'd cheat and say that you told Kendall, 'no' when in reality, you hadn't!" James added.
"What? I would never do that!" I replied, which would have been more convincing had my voice not got all high-pitched and squeaky.
James and Carlos, as well as I knew that my voice getting high-pitched and squeaky was a tell-tale sign of me telling a little white lie…or getting nervous…or getting caught red-handed…or feeling uncomfortable. Okay, it could mean several different things!
"Tick, tock. Tick, tock," Carlos said, while holding his watch up to his ear.
Kendall sat up in his bed, stretched his arms, and yawned rather obnoxiously if you ask me.
"What's going on? Are we having a band meeting?" a groggy Kendall asked.
"A band meeting? When have we ever had a band meeting?" I retorted.
Kendall held his hands up innocently. James and Carlos wore matching smirks. Where was the snooze button? And more importantly, would said button magically make James and Carlos disappear?
"Did I do something to upset you?" a confused Kendall asked.
However, he wasn't the only one confused. What do I answer? If I answer, 'no,' somehow I don't think that satisfies the terms of the bet. At the same time, if I answer, 'yes,' that isn't exactly telling Kendall 'no' either. But isn't the crux of the bet being disagreeable with Kendall? Then shouldn't I…
"And time," James and Carlos said in unison.
"Time? What are you guys talking about?" Kendall questioned.
I didn't think it was fair that I had to pay James and Carlos anything! If anything, they should be paying me! After all, they both still owed me money! Seriously, what do I look like? An ATM? Just because I'm the most frugal with my money doesn't mean they can keep hitting me up for loans! Of course, I don't dare tell any of them that. Could you imagine the looks on their faces if I did? I rather not go there…
"Carlos and I bet Logie Bear $20 each that he couldn't tell you, 'no' once in one day's time," James explained.
"Oh! Count me in!" Kendall said excitedly. "I could always use some more cash!"
"You guys are horrible!" I commented before sulking out of the bedroom.
Wait. Why was I the one leaving? It was my room! Well, I guess Kendall doesn't have to leave seeing how it's his room too. I mean if he wanted to stay, then that's perfectly fine. But as for the other two, they should have been the ones to leave if anyone had to leave!
"Notice how he didn't exactly say, 'no?'" I heard Carlos comment.
The End