Why?

Trigger Warnings: Guilt, Talk of Suicide attempt from the pov of another character.

A/N: Hi, it's been awhile hasn't it? Two years to be exact, I wonder if anyone actually still wants to read this. How about we look at this as another test chapter. If say atleast five people review then I'll continue this. THIS IS NOT ME MANIPULATING FOR REVIEWS, I JUST DON'T WANT TO WASTE ANYONE'S TIME (OR SPACE) WITH A STORY NOONE WANTS TO READ. I oringinally wrote this story as a way to cope with the trauma from my own suicide attempt about six months before I started this fic (I was in the hospital for about four months) I've mostly recovered from both the trauma and how my mental health diagnosis affected my life. The friends and family it caused me to lose and the ones it helped me find. I'm pretty much now bringing this story back, because I miss writing, I may not be good at it, but I enjoy it. And since one of the friends that I made after my release is going to be moving away to ohio, it's bringing back some of my abandonment issue, so I thought I'd try writing through them again. Thanks for reading.

*Dick's POV*

Dick had to take a few deep breaths before entering the door to his best friend's apartement. He felt like he was walking in a daze. A guilt ridden, anxiety inducing haze, that put self-deprecating thoughts on a loop.

How could this of happened? How could he have let this happen? Wally was his friend, he should have seen this coming.

He thought to himself as he entered the kitchen grabbing the mop bucket and cleaning fluids from under the sink, before heading down the hallway to the white door that was hanging off it's bent door hinges.

Wally had had the dead bolt locked. Had he planned this? Before heading to the hospital he had searched everywhere. He couldn't find a note.

He went inside, kneeled on the floor, and mixed the necessary chemicals to clean up the vomit his friend had left there. Halfway through cleaning Dick had to sit back. Dick had been trained and prepared for every situation imaginable, all except for this, not when it came to Wally.

It was like a puzzle with only two pieces left that for some reason just didn't fit. Why would Wally do this, he just seemed so happy, or had he just thought that Wally looked happy? Maybe Wally wasn't happy, and hadn't been happy for a really long time.

After a while Dick had to leave the room, the images from last night were going through his mind at too fast a rate and he needed time to organize them all.

*Flashback*

Dick groaned as he reached Wally's voice mail for the third timed in a row (why wasn't he answering? He knows Wally's phone's on, he never turns the damn thing off.) After the fourth time hearing the god awful answering machine message he just gave up and put his phone back in his pocket and continued his way down the side-walk of Wally's neighborhood. After the second missed call Dick decided to zeta over to Wally's side of the country to check on him. The fact that he wasn't answering any of his calls and that no one's heard from him for a couple months has Dick worrying for his best friend's welfare.

He knocks on the door a couple times before letting himself in with the spare key. He thinks this might not be the smartest move considering that they weren't exactly on speaking terms at the moment. but a swift punch to the jaw is worth it to make sure his friend is okay.

" Wally? Hey, Wally you awake?" He calls as he walks his way through living room and down the short hallway to the bed room. "Hey! Wally it's me Dick open up!" Knocks again. He tries the door handle, but it doesn't budge.

Dick takes a deep breath before saying "Okay Wally open the door right now, or I'm coming in whether you like it or not."

He waits a full five seconds before kicking the door in, and the sight he finds is one he would have never expected. He sees his friend lying on his stomach, pale and with three empty pill bottles on the floor and a puddle of vomit near the bed.

"WALLY!" Dick rushes to his best friend's side and starts to try to shake him awake. "Wally! Wally what did you take?! I need to know Wally so I can help you! Wally!"

He grabs his cell phone from his pocket and dialed 911. He gives them the situation (he says it's an overdose. He can't bring himself to say it was suicide attempt. His brain still doesn't want to believe it) and the address. He picks up the pill bottles off the floor and reads them to the dispatcher.

Minutes later the ambulance arrives and the EMTs wheel Wally out of the apartment. He follows them to the door of the ambulance before he's turned away, aparently there's not enough room for him to go with them.

Once he finally has a hold of himself he goes to Wally's closet and pulls out a small suitcase and a couple of shirts and pants, packing them in the suitcase so Wally can have something to wear other than the hospital gown. He also throws in a few of Wally's paper back science books and comic books to keep Wally busy. He makes sure not to forget toiletries like toothpaste, a tooth brush, and other essentials. He's not even sure Wally's going to be allowed to keep half these things, but atleast it's there if he can. DIck double checks to make sure he's got everything he thinks Wally might need for his stay before closing the suitcase, and carrying it with him to his hotel so he can rest before seeing Wally the next day.

A/N: Hey, since the last chapter was so short I thought I'd add onto it. Don't know if you'll like it, but here it is. Also would anyone be interested Beta-ing for me?