Bulkheads massive arms locked around Arcee from behind like a thunderclap and she was plucked off her feet as if she weighed nothing.

"Bulkhead! What are you doing?!" She cried, as the massive Autobot backed up, lifting her high in his arms so that Arcee's boots found no purchase.

"You brought this on yourself, Cee." He backed through the doors leading to central command and tromped over to the others, Autobots and humans all. For some reason they had all gathered here this morning. Most looked pissed...some looked even madder than that.

"What the hell is this?" Arcee frowned, trying to wiggle free as Bulkhead her up in front of them.

"Call it pay back." Ratchet tutted, thrusting his chin out.

"Okay, who's first?" Bulkhead rumbled.

"First for what?" Arcee glowered, taking in all their angry glares.

Jack stepped forward and glared back at Arcee where she was pinned helplessly in Bulkheads arms.

"Pimples and playboys huh? Who was it that wanted to be 'detailed' twice at the car wash and told me not to tell? Who is it that makes me flush her chassis with 'new car scent' to keep her feminine fresh while we're there?"

Arcee gaped at him.

Miko jumped forward, slightly behind Jack.

"Yeah! And I'm scared of spiders and bats, huh? Well who is it that can't handle her own 'spider' for the last what? Ten thousand years? Just one two three and Arcee's hangin' in a tree F - U - C - K - E - D!" the fiery teen finished by sticking out her tongue.

"Miko, watch your language." Ratchet admonished her.

"She means Airachnid." Bulkhead rumbled.

"I know who she means!" Arcee tried to look back at him, but then calming her voice she looked down at Miko.

"Look, kid..."

"And...and another thing." Raf stepped forward a little behind Miko. Arcee looked over at him.

Raf turned to Bumblebee, who carried out a loud series of beeps and hoots, punching his fists in the air. Raf nodded and looked back at Arcee.

"Bumblebee says you can kiss his ass. As for what you said to me? I think you can go fuck yourself."

"Rafael!" Ratchet's mouth dropped open.

"You little..." Arcee started.

"Hey hey hey, let's not forget about me!" Smokescreen stepped up, motioning Rafael back.

He turned to Arcee.

"You know I've been dying to ask, what's with the two wheels? We're auto-bots, not bike-bots. And all this leaping around and kicking crap? Who do you think you are? Sonic the hedgehog?"

"Well, she's blue enough for it." Wheeljack chimed in.

"I'll show you a kick, you rookie!" Arcee snarled and her boot shot out and kicked Smokescreen between the legs, where he doubled up and crashed over in front of Wheeljack.

"What's your problem, babe?" Wheeljack frowned, looking back up and over at her. "Anyone so much as looks at you wrong and you turn into a scraplet. All you do is chew ass and you never shut your mouth."

"Listen you over-rated..."

"Hold on, it's my turn." June Darby pushed forward, shoving Smokescreen out of the way as he struggled up onto his hands and knees. He crashed over on his side with a squeak.

"Underpants huh?" June fumed. "Well what about you, you hussy?!" She jabbed a finger up at Arcee. Then she thrust her chest forward and stuck her butt out before she teetered around on her tiptoes, waving her hands in the air.

"Look at me! I'm Arcee. I'm a great warrior. I'm not sexually suggestive at all! I just showed up in my gym clothes with bullet proof tits and a whale tail!"

"I have a teenage son here!" June said as she spun around. "Pull your damn pants up! Show her, Wheeljack!"

Bulkhead turned his arms towards Wheeljack who reached behind her and grabbed Arcee by the back armor, yanking it up hard with one powerful tug.

"HU-UNH!" Arcee cried out, her eyes going wide.

"Uh huh." Wheeljack smirked and reaching up he snapped Arcee's helmet spike off with a PING and began picking his teeth.

"Sorry, I think I got some cheese in my grill."

"And another thing!" Ratchet said as he hauled Smokescreen to his feet. "Old hacksaw is it? Do you think it's easy keeping you in one piece? The rest of us show enough sense to carry some armor, but you zip around no tougher than a balloon animal! Don't come crying to me when you need those broomsticks you call arms set!" He slammed his fists on his hips.

"Yeah!" Smokescreen choked.

Optimus stepped forward between them and Arcee and leaned down slightly to look her in the eye.

"Say AHHH." His voice rumbled.

At a complete loss by now, Arcee opened her mouth and Optimus stuck a tiny piece of paper between her lips.

"That is a bill for the car from Agent Fowler." Optimus explained. "He could not be here today but he decided to let Bulkhead convey his sympathies." Optimus straightened up and motioned to Bulkhead. The massive warrior let Arcee go without a word, spreading his arms wide and dumping her on her ass with a cry.

"Allow me!" He chuckled.

Bulkhead stepped up next to her and just as she looked up at him, he lifted one massive leg and vented his exhaust right in her face with a resounding backfire.

Arcee's face pinched shut and she waved her hands in the blue air.

"I believe agent Fowler's exact words were: How's that for hot air?" Prime narrated gravely.

As everyone turned their backs on Arcee and walked away, the Autobot warriors exchanging high-fives, Optimus Prime bent down, hands on his knees, to address his erstwhile warrior.

Arcee looked up at him in shock.

"Arcee, this remind me of some ancient wisdom I learned long ago...when you're up to your nose in shit, it's better to keep your mouth shut." Optimus straightened up again and walked away.

"How's that for a fucking fortune cookie?" he said over his shoulder.

He walked over to everyone else where they stood by the door and spread his arms wide.

"Ice cream is on me."

The kids cheered and everybody paired up, transforming and falling into line as Optimus led the way out. Ratchet paused near his computer console before following everyone else. He leaned over and pushed a button.

"Megatron? Do you have anything you wish to add?" he spoke in a superior tone, raising his eyes and waiting.

"You're a bitch." The savage Decepticon leader called out through the speaker. Ratchet released the button, walked over to the door leading to the outside, and slammed it behind him.

Arcee stayed where she was, blinking in shock.

"Was it something I said?!"

The end.