Do you want to know a secret, do da do, do you promise not to tell? Do da do… ~ The Beatles

Do You Promise not to Tell?

I am just so angry, all the time.

I don't know where it comes from, or what its purpose is but I'm fairly sure that it's there to destroy my world from around me.

One second I'm laughing with my friends and the next, I'm all hot headed and angry at them for no reason at all. I push them around and bitch about them and then I'm left regretting every single one of my actions and wallowing in my own self- pity.

I don't want to talk to anyone because I'm afraid that I'll bite their head off spontaneously and they'll turn away from me, just like everyone is nowadays, even my cousins.

I suppose it all started when Hugo came out as gay to the rest of the family last year. I don't know why, but I just felt an overwhelming hatred towards him and wanted him out of my life. To cut a long story short, we had fought and Hugo had ended up at the bottom of a cliff, he was lucky to survive. I didn't deliver the push that had sent him over the cliff, he had stumbled on a rock and tripped backwards when I pushed him, so I guess all of the blame falls onto me. Nobody's forgiven me to this day. They say that they have but I can see in their eyes that same hatred that courses through my veins every day.

"Luce."

I jerked out of my daze to see one of my closest friends, Jack Hamlin, standing next to me.

"Hey Jack," I said forcing a smile, "what's up?"

"Come for a walk with me Lucy," Jack said, offering me his hand. I took it worriedly, was Jack about to tell me that Tessa, Amber and Carson didn't want to be friends with me anymore? I followed Jack in silence down to the grounds, hoping and praying that he wasn't about to deliver the news that I was thinking about.

"Sit down," Jack said, sitting by the bank of the lake and stretching out underneath at the beach tree. I sat down nervously, leaning against the tree for support.

"What's this about, Jack?" I asked nervously.

"I wanted to talk to you," Jack said, shutting his eyes as my heart's pace quickened to what seemed like a million beats per minute.

"What about?" I asked, trying to keep my cool while I freaked out on the inside. Jack opened his eyes and sat up, sighing at me.

"You don't have to hide it Luce, I can see straight through that façade of yours," Jack said, shaking his head, "Why are you so angry?"

"What are you talking about?" I said hotly, not wanting to discuss this with Jack of all people.

"I'm talking about what's been happening for the past year and a half, we thought that it was just hormones and that you would grow out of it as time went by but you haven't, and the others don't agree with me but I think it's time that we had a little talk," Jack said.

I fired up immediately, "I do not need to discuss my bloody hormones with you Mister Jack Hamlin!" I yelled, jumping up and moving to walk away, angry tears welling in my eyes.

"You love her, don't you?" Jack said softly. This made me stop in my tracks and turn around, staring quizzically at Jack who was still seated in the same position under the beach tree, "That's why you're acting like this Lucy, you're confused and it's killing you, isn't it?"

I paused for a second, "And who exactly is it that I love?" I asked Jack, walking back over and sitting down, my heart starting to thunder again.

"Amber," Jack said simply. I burst out laughing. "What?" Jack said innocently, "I know it's true Lucy, there's no point in denying it."

"Of course I love Amber," I said, rolling my eyes, "As a friend, nothing more and nothing less."

"Well I think you've got a little more than friendship on your mind," Jack said hoisting himself up and grinning at me, "Just think about it for a while and you'll see that I'm right and I'm here if you need to talk."

With that, he walked away.

I scoffed, staring out over the lake. Love Amber? No way, she's my friend. But Jack was right, as he always was, the more I thought about it the more I realised that maybe I did love her.

I had always been jealous of Amber's eyes; ever since we were in first year I had loved her eyes and wished that mine were that beautiful chocolaty shade of brown that seemed to melt my heart every time she looked into them. Her laugh and her smile made my heart race as her lips curved upwards and emitted the most beautiful sound that I had ever heard.

And her body, oh god her body was to die for. She was slender and tall with round full breasts that stood out to me whenever I was with her, I couldn't keep my eyes off of them. How had I only realised now?

I wasn't long before the sun started to set and I still didn't feel like moving.

"Still out here Luce?" I heard Jack ask from behind me, "We missed you at dinner."

"I couldn't face her," I said softly a tear rolling down my cheek.

"Who?" Jack asked.

"Amber," I whispered softly into the night, the name feeling sweet on my tongue.

"Lucy," Jack said slowly, "Is there something that you wanted to tell me?"

"You were right," I said quietly, "You're always right, I do love Amber as more than a friend."

"Finally," Jack said happily, "Does this mean that you're happy now that you're less confused about who you are?"

I shook my head tearfully.

"Why not?" Jack asked in disappointment.

"Because I can't ever tell her," I sniffed, "It would ruin our friendship."

Jack moved to sit next to me and put an arm around my shaking shoulders, "Look, Luce, if Amber is a true friend then nothing will get in the way of your friendship, you should tell her."

"I can't," I whispered, "it's complicated Jack, but I can't ever tell anyone about this."

"Why not?" Jack asked, puzzled.

"You have to promise not to tell," I said urgently, "please Jack you can't tell anyone, promise me that you won't tell anyone."

Still looking very confused Jack opened his mouth and said, "I promise."

AN: So I have lots of different head!canon's for Lucy, there's depressed!lucy, rebellious!Lucy and angrylesbian!Lucy, they all come from a different verse that I write in and this characterisation of Lucy is from the Light of Day verse so you may have recognised some stuff from there if you've read that :)

This was for:

The 2012 Hogwarts Games – Shot Put: Round 1 – Theme, Dark secrets.

The Favourite Character Bootcamp Challenge - Prompt #14: Tell

This will probably turn into a oneshot collection regardless if I get into the next round of shotput or not so if you enjoyed please either leave a little comment for me down in the review box or alert so that you get emails when I update :)

Until Next Time

~The Original Horcrux~