I'm sorry for not updating this. Personally I just couldn't get into the mindset to do it. So I finally did write a little piece however first I want to share with you a little girl I knew a almost two decades ago who took her own life recently at the age of twenty five, after dealing with a trauma that no person should have to, let alone a five year old. You hear about school shootings all the time but so many acts of bravery go unnoticed.

When I was a little girl I went to a school with lots of other little girls and boys. I played in the sandbox and on the monkey bars and I was happy. Now as a realize for the first time just how precious every life is I can't help but wonder would I realize how valuable it is without that stain on the floor and tribute on the wall next to a broken mirror.

I'm not a little girl. Those words still play in my head, the stain still haunts my dreams. Rust colored circles dance around me, her face is that of a ghost so familiar to me now. She haunts me.

I'm not a little girl, I am all grown up. She was all grown up too, but she didn't get to be as grown up as I am now. She was 22, I'm 23.

He was once a little boy too, now he's all grown up with an orange jumpsuit. He's the reason she didn't get to grow any older. I wonder what made him into a bad grown up. I wonder why he thought she had to die. I wonder if her life was worth only fifty of his years. I wonder if that orange outfit reminds him enough of her.

She was kind and caring and everything a teacher should be. She was smart and a little silly. She helped in any way she could. She was going to teach me how to write in cursive and divide and all about butterflies. She has been gone for fifteen years and I still can't tell you why that little boy grew up and made her go away.

She is gone. I am here.

"We the jury find the defendant..."

12 hours earlier.

"Elle Green, that's who has her." Questioning eyes were glued to her as she spoke.

"The Elle who worked here before you? That Elle?" asked Munch.

Olivia nodded. Dark hair and slightly sunken features were prominent the last time Elle had visited her, nearly a decade before after leaving the Feds. She was a woman descending into madness.

"Where do we find her? How do we find her?"

"We don't," said George, "we won't ever catch her this way. There is only one person in the whole world who has a chance. Let me make a call."

Olivia heard the crunch of seven sets of heavy boots on twigs and grass as they approached a shed like thing in the middle of northern New York in a lightly forested area. A circle of dirt surrounded the building. Casey was directly behind wearing a bulletproof vest her and the moon was high in the sky.
After the door fell everything became a blur but Amanda was found and freed mostly unharmed. Both Elle and her accomplice were arrested by the locals to be extricated later to the city of New York. Casey and Amanda were in the hospital but for Olivia and Alex it was no time to rest.

Casey looked around the room as she listened to Amanda give her statement to two detectives who looked like they weren't even old enough to be out of the academy. They dealt in these crimes everyday but hearing her lover tell of the horrible things that happened to her over the last four days was something incomprehensible to her.

"We the jury find the defendant guilty on all charges."
It was over, the hellacious, awful time this had been was over. Over. He was going to be locked away far from Olivia, unable to hurt her and Alex took what she thought had to be her first full breath in